by Gina Drayer
“For you maybe, but what about me?”
“You don’t get any special treatment because we’re dating.” Jason pinched the bridge of his nose and let out a deep breath. “I don’t know what this is about, Kira. I’ve never been good at this. If I try to guess what’s bothering you, I’ll probably get it wrong, so please, just tell me what upset you at the meeting enough to want to break up.”
“You took credit for all the work on the PowerSport project—for work that I did. And quite honestly, it made me feel—it makes me feel used.” Now that she’d said it aloud, the anger was back. “What happened to having my back?”
Jason blinked, his mask slipping a little. She didn’t see guilt or indignation, only confusion. “When did I take credit for your work?”
“Seriously?” she said, tossing her arms in the air. “It was only few hours ago! I was sitting right there when you said it.”
“You just misunderstood,” he said, shaking his head. “I wasn’t taking credit for your work. I wouldn’t. You know how clients are; they don’t care who does the work as long as it’s done. I was accepting praise for the whole team—including you.”
“Don’t do that. Don’t gaslight me,” she ground out. “I know what I heard. You took all the credit while that prehistoric pig from PowerSport ignored me. After everything I did to help save this project. So, don’t you dare tell me that it’s all in my head.” She sniffed and realized tears were rolling down her cheeks. Now she seemed like an emotional woman instead of a disregarded colleague.
Jason’s frown deepened. “Can we just stop this? I don’t know what’s going on. Are you still upset at me about what happened on Friday? Because once again, I say one thing, and you’ve managed to turn it into something else entirely. That’s a real skill, Kira.”
She almost told him to go to hell, but she bit off the harsh words. She was not going to become hysterical, because she knew that would weaken her point.
“Look, don’t you see how this is a problem? How are we supposed to be a couple when I can’t count on you to be on my side? At work, or at home.” She forced herself to level her tone. “You said we make a good team, but I don’t want to be part of your team. I want a partner.”
“That’s what I meant by team. Us, together.”
Jason stood up from his seat and came around the desk to stand in front of her. They were inches apart and she caught a whiff of his intoxicating masculine scent. She inhaled, remembering what it was like to fall asleep in his arms.
“I hear what you’re saying, but I have a counteroffer,” he said. his intense gaze trained on her, his expression committed. “Before we throw everything away, we sit down and talk this out. We’re smart people. We can figure out how to make this work.”
Her treacherous heart skipped a beat with the knowledge that he wanted to fight for her, but her brain told that stupid organ to sit down and shut up. The one thing she’d learned from her marriage was that love didn’t always conquer all. Sometimes things failed despite your best intentions.
“There’s nothing to work out,” she said firmly. “We had an affair, it was fun, but this is where it needs to stop. End of discussion.” She turned to leave, but he reached out to touch her arm.
“This isn’t the end of the discussion. You decided on your own that we’re over just because you’re hurt and scared.”
“Scared?”
“Yes.” To her surprise, he touched her cheek with gentle fingers, a tenderness lighting those green eyes she loved. “We’re getting too close, and it scares you, doesn’t it? I’m not Cole. I’m not going to give up on you just because things get hard.”
Her earlier dizziness returned, but she fought it. “This doesn’t have anything to do with Cole,” she said in a tight voice.
“It has everything to do with Cole. You keep people at arm's length because you’re afraid to trust. Let me in.”
“That’s not true,” she said, but the protest sounded weak even to her own ears. She was afraid of getting hurt. But not because of Cole. Whatever it was she felt for Jason was stronger than ever before—and getting stronger every day. If she sank any deeper, when things finally did end, it would destroy her. So he might call it fear, but it was self-preservation, plain and simple.
“Then why can’t we work it out? Why can’t we discuss it? Why does it just have to be over when you say it’s over?”
“Because it’s over!” She practically shouted the words. “Why won’t you hear what I’m saying? All I have is my daughter and my job. Those are the most important things in my life. I can’t risk everything to be with you.” She shook her head, angry that the tears were back. “I can’t do it. I don’t want to!”
He clenched his jaw. “So, you won’t even give us a chance?”
“We tried it and it didn’t work. You’re my boss, and I shouldn’t have gotten involved with you in the first place. Let’s move on while we still can.”
“That’s bullshit. You’re running away. You seem to be very good at that.”
That did it. Her anger roared through her, and she didn’t even realize what she was saying when she shouted, “Fine. I’m tired of having people tell me that I’m too afraid to take a chance, a risk. Well, how’s this for taking risks. I’m done. I quit!” She was in his face, yelling. But she’d had enough. “I’m quitting this job, and this company, and you, because I’m tired of people taking me for granted. I’m tired of not being heard.”
She was breathing hard, and Jason just stared at her. When she realized that she’d just quit her job, she almost begged to take it back. She covered her mouth with her hand to hold in the words.
What had she done?
“So that’s your solution, then?” Jason stepped away from her. “You’re done with it all.”
She couldn’t say anything. Her voice was lost.
“Fine. You’re upset and I’m not going to keep fighting with you.”
Kira didn’t stay to hear anything else he had to say. She turned and practically ran from his office, gathered her purse, and raced out of the building.
She’d just quit her job. She’d just quit her job!
As she sat on the train on her way home, she could barely think. Panic coursed through her. How was she going to manage without a job? The economy wasn’t that great, and finding a new one wasn’t as simple as it used to be. She thought of all of the horrible things that could happen, and she froze with fear.
When she got home, Riley gave her an odd look when she came into the kitchen. “You okay, Mom?”
“It’s going to be fine,” Kira said, but she couldn’t even convince herself. Slumping onto a barstool, she put her head in her hands. One thought raced around and around and around in her head.
What have I done?
Chapter 18
Let’s Get Ready to Rumble
We’ve already warned you to keep your private life at home, but what happens when you’re fighting? It’s hard to turn those strong emotions off. The best thing to do when emotions run high is give each other space. Work on different projects, if possible. After your argument is resolved, you can go back to business as usual.
* * *
Jason stared at the closed elevator doors, trying to figure out what the hell just happened. Had she really quit? How did their conversation turn so fast? One second he was riding the high of closing his first big client, and the next he’d lost everything—everything that really mattered.
The one thing he did know for certain was that letting Kira walk out was the stupidest thing he’d ever done, but Jason didn’t know how to stop her. It seemed like the more he tried to reason with her, the angrier she got. If he’d been smart, he would have let her leave before things turned ugly.
But then again, Jason had never been accused of being smart when it came to women. He kept pushing, unwilling to give up on them, and in the end, he always pushed too far.
He wanted to call—go to her house and beat on the door until she talked
to him. But there were even odds that it would just make things worse.
Worse. That thought made him laugh. How much worse could it really get? She’d broken up with him, quit her job. The only thing she hadn’t done was light a match and burn the office to the ground on her way out. But she might as well have. Kira was the heart of this office. They couldn’t survive without her.
There was a chance she’d come back to work. She loved her job; her spontaneous resignation had been uttered in a moment of passion. He’d let her cool down and they’d talk again tomorrow. Maybe by then, he’d figure out what he’d done wrong.
But when he walked into work the next morning, he knew right away it was going to be a shitty day.
The office was dead silent. No one had come in to make coffee, sent out the morning updates. And as the employees started to trickle in, he knew word had already spread. When he entered the break room for his morning cup of coffee, the three people gathered around the machine grabbed their cups and left as if they didn’t want to hear what he had to say. They didn’t make eye contact. But that’s okay, he didn’t feel like talking anyway. He grunted a “good morning” at them as they passed, grabbed his coffee, and headed out without saying another word to anyone.
For the rest of the day, the office was filled with whispers and sideways glances. The topic of conversation: Kira Clark. Heads popped up over cubicle walls while vague emails on the latest hot topic flew back and forth. Jason heard all the rumors. Some people thought she’d been planning to quit ever since he had been hired. Others thought their not-so-secret affair had ended badly and he had broken her heart. He even heard someone say he had fired her.
But all the rumors had a common theme; Kira had left because of him. No one actually came out and said it, but he felt it—whispered accusations sticking to his skin, painting him as the bad guy.
It didn’t help that Kira had come in hours late with red-rimmed eyes and a large box. The gossip hit fever-pitch after that; he could hear it through his closed door. And he could hear her. Hear her voice, picture her dismissing the gossip. He almost went out, grabbed her, and demanded that she change her mind. Dammit, she couldn’t end things between them and quit her job! Was she completely insane?
He refused to cower in his office like he’d done something wrong. When he stepped into the hall, he felt as much as heard the whispers cease immediately. With his teeth gritted, he nodded to Kira.
“Good morning. Did you have time to think about our conversation last night?”
“I did.” She glanced up at him, as cool as a cucumber. Other than the red eyes that no makeup could hide, she seemed completely unaffected by the ending of their relationship. That didn’t help his pride much.
“And?”
“Nothing’s changed. I stand by my decision.”
They stared at each other. He wanted to say something about them, about her quitting, about what the hell had happened, but his heart cracked seeing her cool, emotionless expression staring back at him. That warmth that he’d felt from her just days ago, gone.
It was truly over, wasn’t it?
“Kira—”
“I spoke with Liam this morning and I put in my formal resignation. I’ve given two weeks’ notice. I wish I could give you more time to find my replacement, but I have another position waiting.”
He realized with a jolt that in two weeks he wouldn’t get to see her almost every day. He wouldn’t have coffee with her, walk her home after work, hear about Riley’s day, kiss those soft lips. Hell, he might not see her ever again. The knife she’d planted in his gut twisted.
“Congratulations on your new position,” he said. “We’ll miss you here, of course, but we’re always excited to see our employees discover new opportunities.”
Her eyes went wide and she seemed surprised by his words. Did she think he’d make a scene in the middle of the office? Beg her to stay when she was so determined to leave? He knew when to give up.
“Thank you.” Her voice was soft. “I’m sorry. I’ve loved working here, and I’ve learned so much. But I think it’s for the best, you know?”
He didn’t know, but he’d try to take her word for it. He didn’t know where she was going, or if the line about the new job was just that—a line—but that wasn’t any of his business. Not anymore.
Nodding, he returned to his office, shutting the door against all of the gossip still floating around.
Close to lunchtime, Jason’s phone rang. Glancing at the caller ID, he groaned a little: it was his brother, Matt, who’d probably already heard about Kira’s departure. Knowing Liam, he’d probably already sent her exit interview to corporate.
“Matt,” Jason said by way of greeting.
“Jason, I’m glad I caught you. You have a second to talk?”
He didn’t, not really, but considering everything that had happened, he probably shouldn’t weasel out of this phone conversation. “Yeah, I have time.”
“I just found out about Kira. Liam called first thing this morning. This seems out of the blue. What happened? Have you had a chance to talk to her? Is there something we can do? More money? Fewer responsibilities? She’s not an employee we can really afford to lose.”
Jason opened his mouth to make some excuse, but he couldn’t lie to his brother. For one, Matt would figure it out sooner or later, and besides, he’d rather tell Matt now than have him find out about it through the rumor mill.
With a deep breath, Jason confessed. “She’s leaving because of me.”
The other end of the line was silent for a long time. He thought the call might have dropped until his brother sighed and asked, “What exactly does that mean?”
“It means that she and I … oh, hell, we had a thing. And it ended.”
He could just imagine Matt’s expression as he processed this news.
“A thing? Could this thing be called an affair?”
Jason gritted his teeth. “Yes.” Before Matt could rip into him, he added, “But it isn’t what you’re thinking. It was serious. We were dating. It wasn’t some fling—at least not to me. We got to know each other, and I got to know her daughter, Riley—who’s a firecracker—and I thought …” Sighing, Jason rubbed his face. “I thought it was going somewhere … permanent, but all of a sudden, it just fell apart.”
Matt made a “hmm” sound, and Jason could just imagine him tapping a pen against his desk, remembering all the other times he’d had to fix something Jason had screwed up. But this wasn’t like those other times. The only person who could fix this was Jason. If it could even be fixed.
“How long was this going on?” Matt finally asked. “Did it start right after you were hired?”
“Uh, kind of before?” Jason admitted. “We met at Simon and Julia’s wedding.”
“What?” Matt practically screamed into the phone. “You slept with one of our employees at Simon’s wedding? Fuck, Jason, what were you thinking?”
“It wasn’t like that. I didn’t sleep with her. We just had drinks and talked. But after I moved to New York, things just got more intense.”
Matt sighed on the other end. “This is not looking good. You realize we could be hit with a sexual harassment suit on top of everything else?”
Jason winced. “I know. It wasn’t the best idea,” he said, feeling defeated. “We tried to keep it professional, but … Do you know what it’s like to be around someone day in and day out that you just can’t stop thinking about? It just kind of happened. I don’t regret it, either.”
And he didn’t. Although, he did regretted how it ended—and a part of him still refused to believe that it was truly over. He cherished every second that he’d spent with Kira—having her in his bed, seeing her smile, making her moan. He hadn’t been happy in a long, long time, but he’d been happy with her .
“She’s … she’s amazing,” Jason admitted. Matt didn’t say anything, and Jason was glad for his brother’s silence as the words just spilled out. “Not only is she an amazing wo
rker—which, by the way, I’m not sure any of us appreciated her enough—but she’s been through so much and is still kind-hearted. She’s worked hard for everything she has, and she’s totally devoted to her daughter. I think I fell in love with her when I saw her with Riley, actually. It was like a revelation.”
Matt still hadn’t said anything, which made Jason shift in his chair. Had he really just spilled his guts to his brother? He gritted his teeth. He’d never been one to talk about his feelings, and yet here he was, spouting off Kira’s qualities like she was the sum total of the sun, moon, and stars.
“I’ve never heard you talk about a woman like that before,” Matt finally said quietly. “Not even when you and Bridget first got together. Who, by the way, we always thought wasn’t good enough for you.”
Jason flushed a little. “Why didn’t you say anything?”
“About Bridget? If I had, would you have listened? You were so convinced she was the one that I have a feeling if I had said anything, you would have punched me in the face. Great sex doesn’t equal a great relationship. If it makes you feel better, I hated that I was right about her. I didn’t want to be.”
“I’m such a screw-up.”
Matt snorted. “Not any more than anyone else; you just took that label onto yourself for some reason. You’re human, Jason. You’re allowed to make mistakes. Although in this case, I think the only mistake you made is letting Kira go without putting up a fight.”
Jason swallowed and decided to leave that thought alone for now. He had to think about the business first. “Did Kira say anything to Liam about what happened?” He wasn’t sure if he wanted to know the answer, though.
“Not that I’m aware of. She told him that she’d loved working at Millennial but felt that it was time to move on. Nothing more interesting than that. That being said, she’s been critical to our success, especially last summer. Her absence will be a huge loss to the company.”