by Marian Tee
He parried smoothly, “This is Reid Chalkias’ party, is it not?”
Amusement gleamed in her blue eyes, which were almost the same shade as his. “Ah, true. You have a point.” She made a show of looking at him, her gaze roving his bare muscular body from head to toe. She wetted her lips. “I like what I see.” It was normal for couples to get together for a quickie without exchanging names in Reid’s parties, and she wasn’t shy about instigating
He did the same with her, taking in her high pert breasts, her tiny waist, and her long golden legs, all perfectly flaunted by nearly-nonexistent bikini. It left him cold, but he didn’t give a damn. Behind him, all his senses were acutely attuned to Lilac, and the sound of her occasional laugh flayed him. Looking at Felicity under his lashes, Nick purred, “I’m not sure I like what I see.”
Felicity and the other girls gasped.
“I think…I’d need a sample.” Nick raised a brow. “Don’t you think?”
She pretended to think about it. “What do you think, girls?”
“It’s Nick Christakos,” one of the smarter ones hissed. “Of course he deserves a sample.”
Cheers erupted from the poolside, and the noise drew her attention and Jason’s. Her stomach turned upside down as she saw a girl unclasping her bikini top and then taking Nick’s hand to cover one of her bare breasts.
Everything inside Lilac froze. Jason’s gaze was on hers, and she choked out, “Don’t…pity me.”
“I’m not,” he said harshly. “I pity my brother because he doesn’t fucking appreciate how lucky he is that you love him.”
The realization that Jason knew her secret – maybe even before she had understood how strongly she felt for Nick – made Lilac push her seat back, mumbling an incoherent excuse as she stumbled away.
Nick withdrew his hand the moment the cheers erupted, knowing the game had gone far beyond his liking. The hairs on his nape stood, and Nick stilled, fear chilling his blood. He stumbled, his gaze desperately seeking Lilac or even his brother, but both of them were gone.
Fuck!
Lilac.
Fuck, fuck, fuck!
What the fuck had he done?
“Looking for the girl in white?” Felicity came to stand at his side as she re-tied her bikini at the back.
He nodded curtly.
“Your date?”
This time he acknowledged it. “We’re just friends.”
“Is that so?” Her voice expressed her doubt.
“Yeah.” But Nick was starting to doubt it himself. He and Lilac had done too much, felt too much, and gone too far to be just friends – even the kind of friends that had benefits.
His phone rang. Jason’s name flashed on the screen, and Nick answered it right away. “Give her back to me, Jason.”
His brother’s mirthless laugh spilled out from the other end of the line like poison. “Now you want her back after you hurt her?”
The fact that Jason was speaking in Greek meant he was still with her. “Lilac’s mine.”
“Yes.” Jason’s admission stunned Nick, but before he could answer, Jason said harshly, “But you are not hers, and you fucking shoved the truth down her throat by grabbing another girl’s breast.”
“It was just a game---” But even he knew that was a stupid fucking worthless excuse.
“If you saw her holding another man’s dick, would it seem like a fucking game to you?”
Nick whitened.
Just the thought of seeing Lilac doing something like that – just thinking of Lilac doing something like that had him almost blacking out in pain.
And he had made her feel like that.
“Bring her back, Jason. Please.”
Jason cursed silently. Furious as he was, he couldn’t ignore the way Nick’s voice had shattered at the end. He struggled to be fair even though his every instinct told Jason that the pale girl sitting next to him was better off without Nick Christakos in her life.
“Mother and I have never made any secret about how we felt about the other girl.”
Nick said tightly, “She has nothing to do---”
“She has everything to do with this. Because you still love her---don’t you?”
I don’t know who else to turn to, Nick. Please help me.
He closed his eyes. Maybe this wasn’t love. Maybe this was just need. Or honor. He didn’t fucking know anymore. All Nick knew was that he couldn’t leave her helpless.
Karla.
The name was enough to make Nick sick because it reminded him of how weak he had been.
“While you’re trying to fucking figure out what you feel for that bitch, the girl next to me is hurting for you – and because of you.”
Nick said tautly, “I didn’t mean to hurt her.”
“IT DOESN’T FUCKING MATTER WHEN WE BOTH KNOW SHE’S IN LOVE WITH YOU.”
The words hammered into Nick’s brain and he fell to the ground on his knees, the truth of Jason’s words throwing his world off tangent.
Lilac loved him.
“Nick?” Lilac’s voice came from the other end of the line a little too soft, a little too hesitant. He broke a little more at the sound, knowing it was because of him. Nick knew Jason had deliberately omitted telling him that he was passing the phone to Lilac to force his hand. He didn’t blame Jason – right now, he could only be thankful that someone was treating her right.
Lilac loved him.
Nick should have seen it, known it, should have felt it with every every fiber of his being. Karla…Karla might have been the one who brought him back to life, but Lilac was the one who made his heart beat now.
Because Lilac loved him.
Nick forced himself to speak, his voice coming out hoarse and uneven as he said, “Hello, sweetheart.”
Silence descended on the ballroom as the duke bowed. He was resplendent in black, more elegant than austere---a strikingly powerful figure who drew gazes all around him. Fans fluttered, quizzing glasses raised high as he took to the dance floor, holding the hand of a girl that was…not her.
She stepped back with a silent sob, blending in the shadows as only a wallflower could.
Lilting notes from a violin played in the air, and the rest of the orchestra followed. The duke and his betrothed whirled like a prince and princess straight out from a fairytale.
If this was what she had wanted, then why did it hurt so terribly?
Lilac fell back against the passenger seat in Jason’s car, a midnight-black coupe that matched the essence of its owner. She stared fixedly out the window, doing her best not to cry.
“Are you still there, Lilac?”
She wiped away the tears that had managed to fall. Just the sound of Nick’s voice was enough for her entire body to hurt. All the places he touched, he kissed – it all hurt because she belonged to him, and he didn’t want her anymore.
“Yes.”
His heart clenched at the tear-clogged note in Lilac’s voice. “Jason is taking care of you well?” So many words rushed to his throat, but Nick pushed them all away. None of them were worth saying because they were about him, and right now everything had to be about Lilac.
More tears pricked her eyes at Nick’s voice. He was hurting. And she hurt even more, knowing that she wouldn’t be the one to heal his pain. “I…wasn’t feeling g-good.” Lilac’s fingers clenched around the door handle as she uttered the lie. “Jason o-offered to d-drive me home. So…I accepted.”
Nick exhaled, gripping his phone tightly because right now it felt like it was his only connection to Lilac. He closed his eyes, futilely wishing there was a way he could absorb her pain. “Lilac, I---” He stopped, knowing there weren’t words eloquent enough to express how fucking sorry he was.
“No…it’s okay.” Lilac didn’t need his apologies – his excuses. It wasn’t what she wanted to hear. “What happened…” She gripped the door handle more tightly, knuckles turning white, feeling like she needed something to anchor her before the waves of pain could carry her
away.
“It’s best forgotten.”
Nick flinched. “Lilac---”
She shook her head wildly even knowing he couldn’t see her. “If you want…to stay…as friends.” This time, she didn’t wait to hear what Nick had to say, fearing he’d try to change her mind. She pressed the button to end the call and quickly handed the phone back to Jason.
“T-thank you.” She couldn’t meet Jason’s gaze. Fumbling for her own phone, she quickly shut it off, not wanting to expose herself to more temptation.
She had her one night with Nick Christakos. That had been enough for most women, and so it had to be enough for her as well. Now, it was time to move on, to wean herself from Nick because if she didn’t – then she just wouldn’t last another day.
An immeasurable amount of time passed before she resurfaced, hearing Jason say her name.
“Do you have classes today?”
“No. I just have…one subject today, and…Professor Flynn’s…on leave.”
He waited for Lilac to say something more, and when she didn’t, he asked, “Do you want to go straight home?”
Slowly, Lilac shook her head. “No…I don’t.”
“Anywhere you want to go?”
She glanced at him hesitantly. “If you’re…busy---”
“Never,” Jason said quietly. “I’ll never be too busy for you.”
Somehow, the words just made her hurt even more.
****
A surprise was all Jason told her as they boarded the family jet. And when it took off, Jason had escorted her to one of its guest rooms, advising her gently to rest. To her surprise, Lilac slept the entire three-hour-plus flight, awaking only at the respectful knock of one of the flight attendants.
“Mr. Christakos thought you’d appreciate a change of clothes, Ms. York. If you need any extra supplies for your bath, please let me know.”
Taking the packages, Lilac managed a smile. “Thank…you.” Jason’s thoughtfulness was nice, but it also hurt. It reminded her too much of Nick, and that wasn’t a good thing anymore.
Jason’s selection of clothes bordered on the casual, with an assortment of beautiful feminine flannel shirts and jeans that made her blush because they were the perfect fit. There were cardigans and boots, too, making Lilac guess that they were heading somewhere cool.
Jason was waiting for her outside the door, and a slow, sexy smile formed on his lips as he took in her appearance. Lilac had always been beautiful but somehow, she was more so now. Her dark hair contrasted exquisitely with her rosy white complexion and doll eyes.
His lips twitched as he took in her clothes. Somehow, even with the most beautiful clothes in the world, Lilac had still managed to make an unorthodox choice – tangerine cardigan, soft green shirt, and dark blue jeans. It was, without a doubt, Lilac all over.
“Do I look…okay?”
“Perfect,” he said solemnly as he took her hand and guided her to the exit. The plane had already landed, and the flight crew was quick to roll out the red carpet in anticipation of their arrival.
Past the jet doors, the first thing that hit her senses was the scent of pines, followed by the cool breeze that had her shivering a little. She pulled her cardigan closer to her body as her gaze roamed her surroundings. Snow-capped mountains and gorgeous scenery all around – she didn’t need any more clues.
Lilac’s smile when she faced Jason hit him like a ton of bricks, and he gripped the rails tightly. “Colorado,” she breathed in wonder, and just the sound of her voice was enough, binding him to her permanently like a silken rope that no force in the world could ever cut.
Jason’s second surprise was even more wondrous, Lilac wide-eyed and the heaviness in her heart lightening at the sight of the magnificent steam train, with its gleaming red and silver body and the rumbling sounds of its engine running in the background. When it arrived, a loud booming sound thundered in the air, and Lilac jumped before laughing, realizing it was just someone honking the train’s horn.
She looked at Jason and found him smiling down at her. “How do you feel about an afternoon excursion on a historic train?”
Lilac pretended to frown. “I’m not…sure.” She cocked her head to the side, a thoughtful look on her face. “How do I feel…about books and…history?” She raised a brow. “You tell me.”
Jason laughed, but his eyes were solemnly tender as he told her, “No, Lilac. You show me.”
And then he didn’t give her time to breathe, to think, or even to hurt.
Jason had rented the entire train and its crew for just the two of them, with succinct instructions for everyone to entertain Lilac. Throughout the trip, Jason made sure they had a professional photographer and historian in tow to recapture every beautiful moment of their trip with snapshots and meticulous notes.
It was a whirlwind of an adventure, with visits to a charming historic town that might or might not have a haunted hotel, walks through the sometimes-dark, sometimes-glowing tunnels of old mines, and a candlelit dinner on board the train that started as romantic but ended up riotous when Lilac invited the entire crew to join them.
On the flight home, Jason gently brushed off Lilac’s attempt to buckle her own seatbelt, wanting to do it for her. They were quiet throughout the flight, but it was a good kind of silence, one that needed no words.
As the jet landed, and he helped to unbuckle her seatbelt, he asked slowly, “Did you enjoy today?”
She turned to him with doll eyes that were no longer lost, a soft smile that sparkled even if it only curved her lips the slightest bit. Lilac said with a heartfelt catch in her voice, “Yes.”
And Jason was, in a word, dazzled.
But it wouldn’t last, just like how even the brightest stars died a quiet death. Lilac’s quickly drawn breath beside him told Jason that she had finally seen the tall, dark silent figure standing at the hangar, a line of security personnel behind him.
Nick, his brother, his twin---his face exactly like Jason’s, and now their hearts were the same as well because they wanted - needed – the same girl.
The Eighteenth Encounter
Moonlight shone in the background, casting shadows all over the balcony. She was not surprised when the doors opened quietly, followed by the duke’s voice as he asked, “I thought you would not come.”
Without looking back, she said just as softly, “You thought wrong.”
He stood behind her, and his power and strength were like a tangible force at her back. It mocked her, his strength, his grace, his beauty – everything that was his and he wanted to be hers…once.
She looked down, her white silk gloves shining in the dark. Something fell, and a dark spot spread on the silk.
“Don’t cry.” The duke’s voice was harsh.
Stubborn, she thought. He had always thought her stubborn and her tears were proving him right, as more of them fell despite the duke’s command.
She twisted her hands, doing what she could to keep them busy for if they were not…
She said painfully, “I just hope you’re happy, Nikolai.”
The duke did not speak a long time. And when he did, she wished he hadn’t.
“Please address me as Your Grace from here on.”
Lilac missed the last step of the stairs, and she wobbled in the air just before losing her balance. She started to fall, and all she could think of was that the Fates had a twisted sense of humor because that was exactly how Lilac felt ever since she met Nick Christakos.
She had been falling since that first day, and there seemed no way to stop falling.
Sure hands caught her, and she looked up to thank Jason.
But it wasn’t Jason.
It was Nick, and it knocked her off anew, her head reeling.
A lump in his throat, Nick slowly helped Lilac up to her feet. Lilac stiffened at his touch for the first time and he let his hands fall, his heart clenching at the way she carefully took a step back from him.
She looked at him with eyes fi
lled with wariness, and the sight of it hurt – it pained him so much more than seeing Lilac look so goddamn happy with Jason at top of the stairs
The distance between them was just a few inches, but it fucking felt like miles. Jason slowly came to Lilac’s side, but Nick ignored his brother, his gaze focused entirely on Lilac.
“Look at me, sweetheart,” Nick whispered. “Please, look at me.” He didn’t fucking care if he had to beg in front of the entire fucking airport. He needed Lilac to forgive him, to take him back. He needed her. He goddamn needed her more than anyone else in the world.
“I’m so goddamn sorry about what I did. I promise I won’t do it again, won’t fucking shame you like that.” He raked a hand through his hair. “I went crazy. It’s no fucking excuse, but all I can say is that I know I was an ass and I won’t do it again.” When she still did not speak, Nick begged rawly, “Please look at me, sweetheart.”
But she did not, her head lowering, hair falling forward like a curtain to shield her face.
His chest squeezed. God, he couldn’t lose her now. He couldn’t. Maybe, maybe if Karla came back, he wouldn’t need Lilac anymore. But he didn’t think so. Lilac had taken a piece of his heart, and he wasn’t ever going to get it back.
The words came out in a choking mutter, his last hope of living again.
Lilac’s head snapped up, her beautiful doll eyes wide. Beside him, Jason went pale, his gaze just as stunned.
Nick cleared his throat, saying it again. Loudly, clearly, he would fucking shout the words if it would mean having Lilac back.
Lilac’s lips parted in a silent cry.
He said it a third time, looking at Lilac. “I love you.”
And then she was flying to him, her arms wrapping around his neck. Nick lifted her up, his arms wounding tightly around the girl who had become as necessary to him as air in order to breathe.
“I love…you.” She choked out the words against his neck, tears seeping into his chest.
Nick’s gaze met his brother’s as he whispered the most painful lie he had to tell her. “I love you.”