She quickly tossed her green apron into the laundry room and went to the kitchen. After preheating the oven, she pulled out several frozen pizzas and set them on the counter. It had been a while since she’d bought wine, but a quick glance in the fridge told her there was plenty of IPA.
Pizza and beer.
Life was looking up.
Jasper knocked once then let himself in, his boots making loud footsteps in the hall.
“You finally made it?” Kessed teased, handing him a cold Iron Horse IPA.
Jasper took the beer and gave her a stern glare. “I don’t drive like the devil’s on my tail.”
“I don’t either.” Kessed shrugged, taking a swig of the smooth brew.
Jasper shook his head. “Sure, you don’t.” He glanced to the bottle. “Love these guys.” He took a long drink.
“Buy local.” Kessed wiggled her fingers, shrugging her shoulders a bit. The oven dinged, and she turned to the pizzas. “Hope you like pepperoni, and… wait for it… pepperoni,” Kessed teased, setting the pizza onto the bare rack of the oven.
“Are you sure you don’t have pepperoni? It’s my favorite,” Jasper joked from behind.
“Funny.” Kessed closed the oven, then turned. “Have a seat. Spill. Is it Harper’s horse?”
Her eyes studied the way Jasper tensed, then frowned, creating deep creases in his forehead, as if he’d done a lot of it recently. He took a deep breath, tapping the table a few times with this thumb before answering.
“We lost Lady.”
Kessed froze midstep to the table. Jasper’s tone was broken, lost, powerless… and immediately her thoughts ran to Harper.
“How’s Harper?” she whispered, taking the last few steps to the table and finding a seat.
Jasper shook his head slowly, his gaze communicating what a hundred words would have lacked in meaning.
Kessed bit her lip, leaning across the table and grasping Jasper’s hands, her fingers rubbing across his calluses till she laced her fingers through his. “What happened?”
He shook his head. “You know how I said that something felt off?”
She nodded.
Jasper took a slow breath. “I checked everything beforehand, and the foal was in the perfect position, but the cord was wrapped around him. When Lady pushed, he ripped the cord out from inside her, and I”—he closed his eyes—“I couldn’t stop the bleeding, and if I worked any harder on her, I’d have lost them both. The foal needed me to get it breathing since it ended up being a traumatic birth and—“ Jasper set his head in his free hand, closing his eyes tightly as if reliving the whole nightmare. “Harper was crying. I could hear her sobbing as I’m trying to do everything in my power, and all I could think… I was too late… again. I couldn’t do a damn thing to save Harper. I couldn’t do a damn thing to save Lady.” He sighed heavily, his shoulders tense as if bearing the weight of the world—his family. “And then she was gone. There’s so many large blood vessels in the uterine wall during pregnancy, Lady bled out in a matter of minutes. She didn’t suffer,” Jasper whispered.
Kessed tightened her grip on his hand, waiting, just listening, feeling powerless herself to do anything but be present, share his pain.
“I keep telling myself that there was nothing I could have done. And in my head, I know that. But that doesn’t keep me from wishing it weren’t true, or thinking that maybe I could have seen some warning signs. This is the last thing that Harper needed.” Jasper met her gaze with a direct one of his own, his pain echoing in her heart.
“Jasper, knowing it’s not your fault and believing it’s not your fault are two separate things. And I know it’s new, and it’s fresh, but… be careful. You’re not a help to your sister if you’re drowning in self-recrimination. Harsh, but true.” Kessed held her breath, hoping she hadn’t gone too far.
Jasper’s green eyes cooled, then he blinked, breaking the gaze. “You’re right. And I might need another reminder in a day or two. I’m man enough to admit that.” He shrugged his burly shoulders, his powerful form a sharp contrast to the kind heart within.
Kessed blew out a tense breath, hesitating before asking the next question. “The baby?”
Jasper relaxed slightly, his ridged shoulders bowing ever so gently as a ghost of a smile teased his full lips. “Full of piss and vinegar, white as a ghost, and already has decided that Harper’s his new mama.” He gave his head a small shake. “It’s the only saving grace in this hell of a mess.”
Kessed nodded, releasing a pent up breath. “That’s… that’s good. Harper will need that little baby horse, and that horse will need her just as much.”
“Yeah, he’s in for a rough ride, but he’s a pretty determined little cuss. Already kicked me twice.” Jasper absentmindedly rubbed his shoulder.
“I like him already.”
“You would.” A little more of his grin came to life.
“Does he have a name?”
Jasper closed his eyes, a beleaguered expression on his face. Kessed thrilled to see his mood shift to a lighter tone. “This one is all Harper. She named the poor bastard Rake.”
Kessed frowned. “Rake… like what you use to pick up leaves?” She scrunched up her nose.
Jasper shook his head, his grin widening. “No, it’s from all her historical romance books. A rake is actually the bad boy in old-time London.”
“Oh!” Kessed grinned. “Yes! I know now! Ah… I like it.” She arched a brow.
“Why doesn’t that surprise me?”
“Basically, it’s like calling him charming, dangerous, and a ladies’ man. Yup. Good work, Harper.”
“Poor bastard.”
“He’s going to live up to the name, you watch.”
“That’s kinda what I’m afraid of.”
“Hey!” Kessed released his hand and smacked him gently. “A horse with this kind of entrance into the world needs to make a mark. It’s only fair.”
Jasper grinned a crooked smile, shook his head slightly, and sighed. “You might be right. Might. We’ll see how much trouble this little colt becomes.”
“If he’s already kicked you twice, and he’s about a day old, I’d say the odds aren’t in your favor.”
Jasper took a long breath. “Yeah.”
The oven timer dinged, and Kessed stood from her chair. “So, when do I get to meet this tall, dark, and handsome stranger?”
Jasper’s tone was dry. “He’s white, short, and anything but dangerous. His baby kicks are less than threatening.”
Kessed shrugged then pulled out the drawer with the insulated mitts. The oven’s heat blew hot across her face as she opened the door and pulled out the pizzas. The pepperoni was starting to get dark and crispy, just like she preferred.
“That smells so good.” Jasper groaned from behind her. “I haven’t eaten in…” He trailed off. “Damn, I can’t even remember.” The sound of his chair scraping the tile let her know he’d stood from the table.
“Forgetting to eat… something I’ve never done,” Kessed voiced over her shoulder. The drawer below the counter held the knives, and she pulled out a pizza cutter and began to slice.
“Here’s the plates.” Jasper set the white dishes beside her, and she started loading them up.
“Praise God.” Jasper stole a piece and took a bite.
Kessed grinned and handed him a plate. He smiled his thanks and walked over to the table once more.
A comfortable silence surrounded Kessed as they ate. It was nice, relaxing, to just simply be at rest.
Especially after the hell of the day they’d both experienced. As she took her seat once more, Kessed found her mind wandering to Harper. Torn between opening up the subject again and concern for Jasper’s sister, she didn’t know how to proceed.
“What’s on your mind?” Jasper’s enticing baritone surprised her, an
d she glanced up, meeting his inquiring gaze.
“What do you mean?” she asked, tilting her head.
“Your expression… it’s asking a question.” He circled his face with his finger and then picked up another slice of pizza. “And that question is…”
Kessed sighed impatiently. “Am I that transparent?”
Jasper nodded. “Yup.”
“So frustrating,” she grumbled. “Fine. I was wondering about Harper. I’m worried about her, and I didn’t want to reopen the subject since we landed on kind of a high note and… yeah.” Kessed picked up her piece of pizza and took a huge bite.
“Easy, killer.” Jasper arched a dark brow. “And you’re not reopening a conversation. This whole mess, it isn’t over, and won’t be for a while. It’s a process, and it’s healthy to end on a high note, as you put it, but it’s not the only part of the ordeal. You can’t just have one conversation make it all right. But I get what you’re saying, and I’m glad you were being sensitive since it’s so fresh for me. But Harper… she’s hurting right now. She will be fine… with time. And this little colt is exactly the right medicine. Harper needs someone to look at, other than herself. She’s not selfish, by any means, but it’s easy to collapse on yourself after trauma, and this will force her to keep her eyes open, her hands out, and keep stretching herself. She shut down so much over the past year, a survival mode. Rake”—he winced when he said the name, and Kessed bit back a grin—“is going to be the best thing to ever happen to her. At least for now.” Jasper took another bite and nodded once, as if stamping his approval on the subject.
“Can’t argue with that logic,” Kessed replied. “In other news, this pizza is pretty much my favorite frozen variety of all time, in the history of ever.”
“You and food.”
“A girl’s got needs.” She arched a brow.
Jasper’s eyes shot to her, his green eyes smoldering before he glanced away.
“If you don’t stop that I’m going to get turned on every time I eat pizza… not the best situation for me.”
Kessed frowned then remembered that the other night they had ordered the same food as well. “No way. That’s funny.” She giggled. “I seriously didn’t see the connection. Hey, we’re being totally platonic here.” She gestured between the two of them.
“For now,” Jasper challenged, giving her a dangerous grin.
Kessed shrugged, even as her whole body warmed from the inside out with a radiant heat that smoldered deep. “For now.”
Jasper tossed his final pizza crust on the plate and leaned back. “Seriously though, that was the best pizza, probably because I was so damn hungry, but I don’t think I ever said thank you. So, thank you, Kessed. Dinner was amazing.”
Kessed grinned. “Guys gotta eat too. C’mon. I’ll wash. You dry. And then, if you’re feeling energetic, you can help me finish up the last few things for Laken and Cyler tomorrow.”
“Yay.” Jasper gave a pathetic little fist-pump and stood.
“I’m going to need more enthusiasm if you’re going to get laid tonight.” Kessed waited, giving him a teasing grin.
“I can give you enthusiasm.” Jasper placed his hand on his heart, his grin widening as his green eyes sparkled with a dangerous glow.
Kessed shook her head and giggled.
“So, they come home tomorrow? You know what? I don’t think I even know where you live when you’re not here. That’s kinda lame of me.”
“Super lame. You should be ashamed of yourself.” Kessed flicked water from the faucet to Jasper’s face.
He twisted his lips. “Thanks.”
“You’re welcome,” she replied cheerily then stopped up the sink and added the dish soap, causing the white bubbles to fill the larger basin.
“Why are we not using the dishwasher?” Jasper asked, arching a brow as he handed her their two plates.
“Because it’s stupid. We have two plates.” She shook her head, scolding, then grinned. “So, the vet’s not afraid to get dirty but gets all snobby about cleaning. Interesting.”
Jasper sighed impatiently, and Kessed watched him from the corner of her eye as she dipped the plates in the hot water.
A slow grin widened his face and had her turning to look at him suspiciously.
“What’s that grin for?”
“Nothing.” He shrugged, moving to stand on the other side of her. He reached down and picked up a plate from the soapy water then rinsed it off. With slow strokes, he started to dry it. “You know, I was plenty clean in the shower the other night… you know, the one just down the hall….”
Kessed couldn’t help but laugh at his challenging expression. “Fine. You win.”
“That’s right, baby. Talk dirty to me. Say it again,” he whispered by her ear, earning another laugh.
“Seriously!” Kessed swatted at him, flinging a few bubbles onto his shirt.
“See? Clean.” He pointed to the bubbles and shrugged.
“See? Pain in the ass.” Kessed pushed his solid chest with her finger.
“Also true.” Jasper shrugged as Kessed pulled out the last plate and rinsed it off.
He took it from her hand and wiped it dry then took both plates and set them in the cupboard.
“Was that so hard?” Kessed asked, popping her hip.
Jasper glanced over his shoulder then closed the cupboard door. “Insanely so.”
“Then the next few things might kill you. We’re talking full-on sweeping the front porch, checking on Margaret in the barn, and who knows what other torture,” Kessed replied with dry sarcasm.
“I’ll take care of the horse. You tackle the rest of it. Fair?” Jasper leaned back against the countertop.
“Not fair. Plus, Margaret likes me more. I give her special treats.”
Jasper shook his head. “I do too.” Jasper’s cell buzzed from his pocket. With a frown, he pulled it out and unlocked the screen.
Kessed waited, watching as he quickly finger-tapped a reply.
“Harper’s just checking in. She said not to worry if I didn’t see her in the house. She’s spending the night in the barn with Rake.” He gave a sad smile then tucked his phone back in his tight pocket.
Kessed appreciated the view his jeans offered before forcing herself to focus. “In the barn?”
“Yeah, so she can feed Rake. He needs to eat every few hours for the next while. It’s going to be a job, but Harper will be the best adoptive mama ever.”
“Yeah, I’m sure she will be,” Kessed added honestly. She took a deep breath. ”Go, give Margaret an extra sugar cube and tell her it’s from me. Really, don’t even think about taking credit for it, because I’ll cut you. That’s the only horse that I’ve ever actually loved and so, yeah…” Kessed arched a brow.
“Yes, ma’am.” Jasper held up his hands in surrender. “I wouldn’t think of stealing your glory… or credit.”
“I’ll finish up in the house.”
“Hey, you never answered my earlier question. Where do you actually… uh, live?” Jasper asked, his brow furrowed in confusion.
Kessed shrugged as she pulled the broom from its little nook beside the refrigerator. “I live in a small apartment in downtown Ellensburg. Not an exciting story, but it’s home for now.”
“Got it.” Jasper pushed from the counter and walked toward her, causing her to pause. He grasped her hand, enveloping her chilly fingers in his warm ones.
She met his gaze, startled anew by the green hue of his eyes.
“Anywhere you live would feel like home, Kessed.”
He leaned down and gently kissed her lips, sending a thousand delightful shivers down her back that bloomed in her belly. He lingered in the contact, then slowly drew away, leaving her stunned in silence as he walked to the back door and out to the barn.
A slow smile lifted her lips
and she tightened her grip on the broom.
She had always thought of home as a place.
But maybe, just maybe… home was a person.
And Jasper just might be hers.
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
Jasper walked out to the barn, his thoughts lingering on the woman back at the house that had him hogtied in every way. It freaked him the hell out, to be at the mercy of someone else, yet, the greater the risk the greater the reward, right?
The risk was worth taking, but damn it would suck if she wasn’t falling as hard and as fast as he had already fallen. He wanted to think that Kessed had strong feelings for him, but a lingering doubt always persisted in his mind.
Sterling.
What if I am just a replacement? What if he was just available, and she would rather have someone than be alone? He didn’t think Kessed would do such a thing, but she might not realize it either.
And what if Sterling ever decided to have an interest in her? Would he always be her number-one choice? Or had Jasper effectively stepped in fully? Even marginally?
The hard part was not knowing, at least not knowing for sure. But that was part of falling in love.
Having faith in the person who is falling with me, hoping she is holding my heart as tightly as I’m holding hers.
Margaret nickered as he slid the barn door open, the evening light spilling into the dim room.
“Hey there, love. You doing well?” He sauntered over to the stall.
Margaret arched her head over the gate and hung it down, waiting for him to give her a gentle pat.
Jasper obliged and softly stroked her muzzle then scratched her forelocks, earning a low rumble of appreciation. When he stepped back to get her flake of hay, Margaret shook her head, whinnying once again.
“Felt that good, huh?” Jasper teased then tossed the green hay into the pen.
Margaret went over to her dinner, sniffing and scattering the dry leaves of alfalfa with her warm breath before muzzling the flake and taking a bite.
“I’ll be back with your treat.” Jasper patted her solid shoulder and walked to the tack room. He pulled out the small box of sugar cubes, and just as he’d been told, took two from the box and walked back to the stall.
The Courage of a Cowboy Page 14