by Ryanne Corey
Connor opened the door and stopped short. Morris, the last person in the world he had expected to see at this particular moment, was standing on the front porch with his hand raised to knock. Worse still, Morris wasn’t alone. There were several vehicles parked on the road, most of them bearing the insignias of television stations. Bodies were draped over the fence, each one holding a camera focused directly on Connor. There was even a reporter sitting in the branches of a huge oak tree, clicking away. Everyone began waving and shouting questions at him, a confusing barrage of sound and movement. He heard the name Glitter Baby over and over. The commotion roused Boo enough to actually make him bark. Once.
“What the bloody damn hell…?” Connor grabbed Morris by the shirtfront and pulled him inside, leaving Boo on the front porch to stand guard. “Did you bring all those reporters with you?”
Morris peered at him through his wire-rimmed spectacles, mildly indignant. “Of course I didn’t bring them. I’m driving a little rental car that’s not quite big enough for one.”
“I didn’t mean it literally, Morris. How the hell did you find me?”
Morris blinked, looking confused. “How did I find you? I’m a reporter, or did you forget? I went to your hotel. When you weren’t there, I looked up Maxie Calhoon in the phone book. You were right, she’s listed plain as day.”
“And what about everyone else?” Connor grated out. “It looks like the circus came to town outside. How did they find out where she was?”
“They’re here because Glitter Baby is very big news. You know as well as I do after you found her it was only a matter of time before the news leaked. Hell, look on the bright side. We got the interview, thanks to my ingenious creativity. I know it’s a pain in the neck to deal with all this hoopla, but the publicity will send your ratings through the roof.”
“Back up, Morris.” Connor’s voice was low and tight. “Back up to that bit about your ingenious creativity. What did you do?”
Morris brightened, seeing an opportunity to redeem himself. “I made sure you got the interview, that’s what I did! Have you had a personality transplant or something? You told me she was in financial difficulties and was arranging for a mortgage loan. I made sure it didn’t go through.”
“Oh, hell.” Connor sank down in the couch, dropping his head into his hands. He felt sick. “I should have known something like this would happen. I should have known….”
Morris was not only baffled at this point, but more than a little peeved. “Why did you tell me about the stupid loan if you didn’t want me to use it against her? You know how the game is played. It’s not like you’re an amateur, Connor.”
“And after I told you about her loan…?” Connor’s voice was barely audible. “Then what did you do?”
“I found an agency in New York who claimed she still owed them money. I gave them a little incentive to file a lien. They have no intention of letting it go to court, but by the time Maxie figures that out, we’ll have the interview in the can. It worked just the way I planned. She went straight to you and agreed to do the show.” Morris paused, waiting for a pat on the back that didn’t come. “You wanted the interview, Connor. I made sure you got it. That’s what I’m supposed to do.”
It just kept getting worse. Connor dropped his head back on the sofa, hating the pain this would cause Maxie, hating his role in it. “You’re right about one thing, Morris. I’m no amateur. I should have known what would happen.”
“You’re acting like this is a problem. This is what we wanted to happen.”
“Oh, yeah. It’s a dream come true.” Connor’s expression was bleak. “Where’s the crew?”
“Sitting in your room at the motel. I had to bribe the desk clerk to let us in. There wasn’t a spare room in town as of six o’clock this morning. The motel is overrun with reporters and camera crews. There’s not a single parking space to be had on Main Street. They’re swarming like locusts. I thought you might want to know before you walked into the ambush.”
As if on cue, the telephone started ringing. Connor swore beneath his breath, ran to the kitchen and flipped the ringer off. “She’s going to wake up to this zoo,” he muttered, stomping back into the living room. “What am I going to tell her?”
“I don’t know,” Morris said cautiously, “but I’d change into something else if I were you. A dozen photographers just took pictures of Connor Garrett wearing a ruffled pink bathrobe. Pink’s not your color, man.”
“I did this to her,” Connor said bleakly. “Before she met me, she managed to stay incognito. Damn it all to hell, Morris. This isn’t the way I wanted things to happen.”
“Speaking of things happening…” Morris paused, choosing his words carefully. “Are you and…well, the two of you…did you…?”
“That’s none of your damn business, Morris.”
Morris gave a soft whistle, his eyes stretching. “I don’t believe this. You did it, didn’t you? You lucky dog, you did it! I worship you. Every man in America will worship you. You not only landed the interview of the decade—you actually slept with Glitter Baby!”
Before Connor could decide whether to knock him down or just throw him out, Maxie walked into the room, dressed only in Connor’s white dress shirt. He had no idea what she had heard, but judging from the look on her face, she’d heard too much.
“Maxie,” he said urgently, “just give me a chance—”
“Who are you?” she interrupted, staring at Morris with lifeless eyes.
Apparently Morris was struck dumb by Maxie’s presence, not to mention her abbreviated attire. His mouth moved, but no sound came out. Connor threw him a look that could kill. “His name is Morris and he’s part of my crew. He came out here to warn us. Look, the front yard is crawling with reporters—the entire town is crawling with reporters. I don’t know how they found you, but they did.”
Maxie sat down on the very edge of the sofa, her movements rigid, as if she was in terrible pain. “It doesn’t matter.”
“What do you mean, it doesn’t matter?”
She looked up at him, meeting his eyes for the first time. Her hands were clasped in her lap. “The most important thing,” she said dully, “is that you got to sleep with Glitter Baby.”
Nine
Maxie had fallen asleep in a dream and awakened in a nightmare.
It wasn’t an unfamiliar nightmare; not by a long shot. She knew it by heart. The telephone had to be off the hook or it would have been ringing incessantly. The drapes were pulled. Connor had made an SOS call on his cell phone and two sheriff’s deputies had appeared fifteen minutes later, sirens wailing and lights flashing. They took up their posts at the entrance to her driveway, keeping ambitious photographers and reporters out of the trees and off the fences. Unfortunately, there was no way to keep them off the main road, no legal way to take away their cameras or telephoto lenses. Maxie felt like she was trapped in the Alamo, and the enemy had somehow found his way inside with her.
“You’ve got to talk to me.” Connor’s voice was rippling with strain through the bedroom door. “Maxie…damn it all, you know how I feel about you. You, not some invention of the media. I can’t help it if Morris is an idiot. His mouth ran away with him, and I’m sorry. You weren’t supposed to hear that.”
“No, I guess not.” Maxie remained curled up on her bed, staring at the closed blinds over the window and trying to think things through. It had been forty-five minutes since she had walked back in the bedroom and locked the door behind her. She had opened it just once, to toss Connor’s clothes out into the hall. She knew he wouldn’t leave wearing a pink bathrobe. And she wanted him to leave. “Go away, Connor.”
Connor groaned and thumped his head against the door. “Maxie, I’ll cancel the interview. Hell, I’ll fire Morris and quit my job if you want. I’ll do anything. Just…come out and talk to me. Tell me how to help you.”
“I don’t need your help.” The room started to swim with her tears. Maxie concentrated fiercely, wi
lling them away. She couldn’t afford to fall apart. She would be damned if she would fall apart. She’d gone down that road once, and it hadn’t been pretty. “I’m an old pro at dealing with situations like this. Being used, being lied to, being hunted down. I can handle it all.”
Connor muttered an amazing string of four-letter words beneath his breath. He knew it was his fault her whereabouts had become common knowledge, albeit indirectly. Someone had tapped in on a phone conversation or bribed one of his camera crew or talked to one of the execs at the network. As Morris had pointed out, he wasn’t a novice, he should have taken more precautions. If he hadn’t been so damned lost in love, he would have been more careful.
He’d never told her, either. He’d never said he loved her, and now it was too late. She wouldn’t believe him.
He sank down on the floor, resting his back against the bedroom door. He’d lost the pink bathrobe and was now wearing a wrinkled tuxedo that looked almost as stupid. How had it all come apart so quickly? Now Maxie was thrown to the wolves once again. He hurt from the knowledge that he was responsible for turning her quiet sanctuary into a prison. Whatever trust she had put in him was destroyed.
“Maxie?” There was a heavy undercurrent in his voice, an audible guilt trip of massive proportions. “Listen to me, please. You don’t have to say anything, just listen. I should have protected you. I should have guarded you and kept you safe from those vultures outside. Instead…hell, I’m one of ’em. You had it all together before you met me. The cows, Harvey, your garden, this place. You built this amazing life for yourself. Then I come along and screw it all up. In the space of a few days I ruin everything you’ve worked so hard to build. I don’t know how it happened, I never meant it to happen, but you have to believe me when I say I never wanted—”
The bedroom door opened suddenly, sending Connor backwards. He blinked upwards at Maxie from his new position on the floor. She was wearing her overalls and her hair was stuffed into a baseball cap. Other than looking pale, she seemed quite composed. Almost too composed.
“What do you think you’re doing?” Connor asked.
Maxie stepped over his prone body as if he were a bug. “Have you seen my mud boots?”
“The cow-milking boots?”
“Yes.”
“By the front door.” Connor scrambled to his feet, trailing her into the living room. “Maxie? Where do you think you’re going?”
“I have chores to do. You’ve been found out, Connor. There’s no sense sticking around now.”
Connor watched with disbelief as she pulled on her giant yellow mud boots. “You’re going outside?”
“Go away, Connor. Go far, far away.”
“Look, you can tell me to go away till the moon turns blue but I’m not leaving you! I know what I’m responsible for here! I have to salvage something out of this mess. I’m not leaving you to face all this craziness alone. You need me, and I’m going to be here for you. That’s final.”
“Are you serious?” Maxie gave a short, hard laugh, turning to face him. “Is that what you think? Oh, Connor, you flatter yourself. I don’t need you to salvage anything. I haven’t lost a damn thing, not really. Well, I suppose I did lose my virginity, but that was my choice. And please don’t feel guilty for that as well, because I enjoyed myself thoroughly.”
Connor closed his eyes briefly. “Maxie, you know there was more to it than that. I realize you’re hurt, but don’t twist this into something sordid. Don’t.”
“I never said it was sordid. A good time was had by all. Maybe you’ll get a raise for being the one to find me. That bank-loan maneuver was terribly impressive.”
“I told you, Morris did that on his own.”
“And who told Morris about the loan in the first place?”
“I did.”
Maxie shrugged. “Like I said, you’ll probably get a raise. Have you seen my gloves?”
“On the porch,” Connor grated out. “What are you going to do now? Walk outside dressed like that in front of fifty photographers?”
This seemed to check her. She stared long and hard at Connor, as if she couldn’t quite believe what she was hearing. “First of all,” she said softly, “I am dressed like this because my cows need to be milked before they explode. I would probably look better for the cameras if I changed back into that dress you bought me, but it would be hell trying to work in it and the yellow mud boots would clash. Second, I feel obligated to tell you that it isn’t in your power, or anyone else’s, to take away the things I hold dear in my life. I’m going outside to do what I always do. I truly don’t care if my overalls aren’t up to Glitter Baby’s standards…or yours.”
“I don’t give a damn about Glitter Baby!” Connor tried to take her in his arms, but she backed away, shaking her head mutely. “All right,” he said tiredly. “You feel you have a point to make for the reporters outside, I’ll make it with you. You’re not doing this alone.”
“Hold it.” Maxie drew a shaky breath, her throat growing tight and painful. She wanted no misunderstandings. Now more than ever, she wanted him to understand who she really was. “I don’t want you here and I don’t need you here. I’m not afraid of walking to my barn in my overalls, Connor. I’m not afraid for the world to see me as I am now. You might not believe this, but I’m proud of who I am. I can look into the mirror and like what I see. Can you say the same thing?” Then, when Connor didn’t answer, “I didn’t think so.”
“And what about us?”
“What about us?” Maxie echoed tonelessly. “There is no us, Connor. I don’t know who you slept with last night, but it wasn’t plain, old Maxie. So obviously, there is no us.”
“Don’t do this, Maxie. You know damn well who I was with last night.”
“Actually, I don’t. And that…that just isn’t good enough for me. I don’t make compromises any longer. It’s never worth the price you pay. So if being true to myself means I might have to be alone, then I’ll be alone. And I’ll be all right.”
There were tears in her eyes, but she decided not to fight them. She figured they were as much a part of this moment as the words she spoke. Losing him hurt, but not nearly as much as losing herself would hurt.
“Don’t push me away, Maxie. Let me help.”
“Help with what?” Maxie walked over to the window, pulling the drapes wide. “You think I need help dealing with this?” She gestured outside, at all the little stick figures on the main road scrambling for a picture. “No, Connor. This is child’s play for me. I admit I had a bad moment there, but I’m fine now. My head is still on straight, my heart is bruised but not broken. I don’t need you or anyone else to get through this. When I come back inside, I’d like you to be gone. And Connor?”
“What?”
Her eyes were misted with unshed tears, but her gaze was direct and cold. “Don’t ever come back.”
Connor watched her walk out the front door, and listened as the barrage of questions came at her from all sides. Hell, it sounded as though a couple of the reporters had megaphones. Moving slowly, he went to the window, watching her walk down the front steps into the sun and give the reporters a quick wave. Then, without once glancing back at the house, she continued across the yard to the barn. She looked absurdly small and defenseless in her baggy overalls and knee-high rubber boots. She was everything he hoped for in this life and the next. His worry for her was at fever pitch, a stabbing emotion that tormented him.
He closed his eyes, taking a deep breath that didn’t seem to reach his lungs. He was hurting so much, every cell in his body aching, he couldn’t think. Neither could he escape the haunting voice echoing in the darkest corners of his mind: Don’t ever come back.
He felt like he’d been turned away at the gates of heaven.
When Maxie returned from milking, the reporters were still hovering and Connor’s car was gone. She’d expected it, but she didn’t anticipate the emptiness that echoed through the house. Connor’s absence made as deep an impa
ct as his presence had. There were signs of their time together everywhere—the tumbled sheets on the bed, the wilted wrist corsage on the dresser, two ticket stubs for the Oakley High School homecoming dance. Here and there she could detect a whiff of his cologne, evoking powerful and sensual memories.
You actually slept with Glitter Baby.
She allowed herself a good hard cry at that point. Despite the show of bravado she had put on for the assembled reporters, she was hurting as she had never hurt before. It was more than her loss of privacy that devastated her. It was the knowledge that she would never be free of Glitter Baby. Whatever her feelings were for Connor—and she very much feared she loved him—she was justifiably frightened of his motives. He had set out to find the phenomenon known as Glitter Baby, and that was precisely what he had done. She had deluded herself into thinking he was attracted to Maxie Calhoon, but she knew now how horribly wrong she had been. Judging from Morris’s comments, sleeping with Glitter Baby was a feather in Connor’s cap.
She called her mother and filled her in on everything that had happened. Well, almost everything.
“What do you mean, ‘When we got up the press was everywhere’?” Natalie demanded. “What exactly does we mean?”
I’d make a terrible spy, Maxie thought. I have a big mouth. “I meant me,” she explained hastily. “I meant when I got up this morning.”
“You’re lying. I’ve always been able to tell when you were lying, Maxie. Something happened last night, didn’t it? After Connor took you to the dance—”
“Mother, this isn’t about my love life. Will you please just listen—”
“Hold it,” Natalie interrupted. “This is very interesting to me. I wasn’t aware you had a love life.”
I did, Maxie thought. Almost. “What I had or didn’t have isn’t the point. The secret is out, my house is besieged and Connor Garrett is no different than anyone else. He wanted to use Glitter Baby as his own personal stepping stone. And,” she added with a watery sniff, “I let him.”