Sunflower

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Sunflower Page 16

by Jill Marie Landis


  “Your drawers, my lady.” With a formal bow he presented her with the pantalets. “Would you like me to wait for you, or do you think we should go back inside separately?”

  Analisa stared up at him wide-eyed, unsure of how to answer. What she craved most was to wash, put on a clean nightgown and crawl between the sheets ... with Caleb. Reality told her that her dream was impossible, that she had to return to face her new friends, her son, and a pile of dirty dishes. For an instant she wanted to wish them all away, but only for an instant. Hesitantly, she returned Caleb’s quick kiss and turned him away from her. He seemed to understand her need for privacy and walked out of the shed to stand just beyond her vision, fastening his own trousers as he went.

  While Analisa readjusted her clothing, Caleb leaned back against the outer wall of the shed and looked up at the winter sky. A wide, satisfied smile lit his face as he stood with his hands deep in his pockets. Of all the homecomings he could have imagined, none could have been as much of a surprise or delight as the one he’d just received. “Thanks for the advice, Ruth,” he whispered as he looked up at the stars and, still smiling, turned as he sensed Analisa’s presence near him. He reached out to take her elbow and escort his lady back into the soddie.

  During the brief walk, Caleb and Analisa decided not to offer any excuse for their absence, and upon entering, they were met by Sophie and Jon, who had obviously decided not to ask. Kase was lost in concentration as he lined the tin soldiers up on the table. Sophie bustled from the dishpan to the stove while Jon, his fiddle stowed in its case, sat at the table and lit his pipe.

  “Caleb,” Jon called out, a smile lighting his face. “Come and join me for a Christmas toast while the women finish up the dishes.” He pulled a flat silver flask from his hip pocket and poured a hearty draft of whiskey into his coffee cup.

  Caleb looked to Analisa, who was tying an apron over her plaid wool dress and, at her slight nod of encouragement, seated himself on the bench beside Jon. The two men began to talk of business ventures while Sophie and Analisa made quick work of the dishes and pans.

  “Anja, listen,” Sophie said softly while the men talked amiably. “Jon and I want to take Kase home with us tonight, if you would agree. We haven’t mentioned it to him yet, because I wanted to see if you had any objections.”

  Analisa began to protest, but Sophie hurried on. “We would love to have him stay with us. Besides, it would give you and Caleb time to work things out. What do you think?”

  “Oh, Sophie ... I don’t know ...” Analisa shook her head, a worried expression darkening her radiant glow. “Kase has never been away from me, not even for a night, since the day he was born.”

  “You know we will care for him as if he were our own. It’s only for a night or two. Whatever you decide.”

  Glancing over her shoulder at Kase playing quietly by himself and then toward Caleb, who sent her a secret smile that warmed her to her toes, Analisa turned back to Sophie with her answer.

  “You can ask Kase. If he wants to go, he has my permission. I think you are right, Sophie. This first night with Caleb back will be quite awkward with the three of us here, but Kase may want to be with Caleb, too.”

  Sophie called the boy to her side. “Kase, would you like to come back to town with Jon and me and stay with us for Christmas Day and night?”

  Looking at his mother with excitement shining in his eyes, Kase nodded enthusiastically. “Ja, Mama? I can go with Sophie?”

  “If you’d like to, Kase. You will have to get your nightshirt and change into your other clothes. Find a brush for your hair, too.”

  “Can I take my soldiers?”

  “Yes.” Analisa nodded, watching Caleb’s reaction to the news of the boy’s sudden departure. Lifting his coffee, he met her eyes over the rim of the cup and sent her another secret smile.

  “Bring your skates, too, Kase, and we will try the pond near the edge of town,” Jon added as he went outside to hitch his horse to the rig.

  Finally, they were ready to go, Jon and Sophie standing just inside the doorway, wrapped in their heavy coats, Kase bundled between them. Analisa bent to kiss her son good-bye.

  The boy noticed her worried look and suddenly turned to Caleb. “Caleb, are you going to be here while I’m gone?”

  His gaze steady, the man answered, “Yes. And when you get back, too.”

  “Good, because I couldn’t leave Mama here all by herself if you were not going to stay with her.”

  The adults laughed to cover their embarrassment, and Caleb knelt to say his own farewell to Kase. They spoke quietly, heads together as they talked while Caleb pulled the collar of Kase’s thick coat up around his neck.

  “You have a good time with the Aliens and don’t worry about your mother, all right?”

  “All right, Caleb. Don’t feel bad. We will play with the new soldiers when I get back.”

  “Good. I’ll ride into town to pick you up day after tomorrow, so you be ready, you hear?” Standing once more, Caleb slipped an arm around Analisa’s shoulders and watched the boy walk out of the house with Sophie and climb into the rig. Wrapped in lap robes and bundled to their noses, Sophie and Kase huddled near Jon as he turned the horse and buggy and headed out the gate. Sleighbells added a magical sound to the special night. Caleb and Analisa watched them until the carriage was swallowed up by the darkness.

  Closing the door, Caleb drew the latch into place, then turned and noticed the tears shimmering in Analisa’s eyes. He drew her into his arms and heard her sigh.

  “What is it?” He kissed her brow.

  “He’s never been away from me before ...”

  Caleb heard her breath catch in her throat, lifted her chin with his forefinger, and watched as the tears brimmed over and slid down her cheeks.

  “I’ll try to take your mind off of him,” Caleb told her as he lowered his lips to hers and began to replace her thoughts of Kase with new sensations.

  Sunlight streaked through the windowpanes, melting the tiny frost crystals that had formed on them during the hours of darkness. The beams of light spread across the high bed beside the window, jumped its shadow, and streaked across the floor, dispersing the chill that had crept into the room the night before.

  Lying still beneath the warm down coverlet, Analisa watched dust motes play in the sunbeams. She’d grown used to the constant settling and shifting of dust from the earthen ceiling of the sod house. Quiet moments passed before she turned her thoughts away from the dancing specks to the man sleeping beside her, his long form stretched out full length on her bed.

  The thick comforter hid all of him except his nose, eyes, and blue-black hair as he slept, unaware of her scrutiny. He was nude beneath the covers. Analisa was tempted to run her hand along his side, to feel the firm muscles bunched beneath the smooth skin of his hips and powerful thighs, but she chose to let him sleep on.

  The day and two nights since Caleb’s return had passed all too quickly as they had used the precious moments to grow acquainted with their new love in the quiet solitude. Analisa smiled to herself as she remembered the way they had hurried through the daily chores, feeding the animals, stoking the stove, barely taking time to eat. Like children, they had created a private world of their own, free from intrusion and filled with laughter. Analisa sought to etch the precious memories on her mind as she lay quietly watching Caleb sleep.

  She recalled the way he’d asked about her family, wanting to gain some knowledge of her people. She had climbed from the bed and rummaged through her trunk to retrieve a photograph of the Van Meeterens. Without looking at it herself, she’d handed it to Caleb.

  He held it quietly for a time, seemingly aware of her inner struggle as she steeled herself to look at the photograph. When Analisa felt his arm slip around her shoulders and draw her near, she took her strength from his and reached for the pictures. Memories came flooding back.

  The picture had been taken in New York. Photographers had waited at the docks to entice the
boatloads of immigrants to purchase mementos of their arrival in the New World. Her father, Emmett Van Meeteren, so proud of his decision to move to a new land of wealth and promise, had chosen to part with a portion of their stake in the future and so lined his family up for the portrait.

  Analisa had tried to view the picture as Caleb might. The Van Meeterens stood proud and ramrod straight, adults and older children arranged behind the two youngsters. Jan, Analisa’s nineteen-year-old brother, stood on the far left next to Mama, then Edvard, standing between Mama and Papa, and then Analisa herself. How young I look, she’d thought, staring at herself at sixteen. Two long braids hung over her shoulders and across her breasts. Her blue eyes appeared nearly transparent in the photograph, the subjects all portrayed in black, white, and shades of gray. So very young and so very innocent, she’d added. Her eyes were as wondering as Pieter’s and Meika’s. While she stared at the picture, she had wondered if the children’s expressions still held that look of innocence, the look she’d lost long ago. What was life among the Indians doing to them?

  It was then Analisa had told Caleb about her hope of one day being reunited with Meika and Pieter. She prayed they would escape their captors and make their way to a white settlement. Caleb’s silence, his refusal to reassure her, had hurt Analisa, darkening the moment. She’d returned the photograph to the safety of the trunk and vowed to hold on to her hope.

  As if he sensed her distress, Caleb had tried to lighten the mood. She remembered answering his questions about the name Anja.

  “It’s just a childhood name. A way to say, Little Anna,” she explained. “Do you have any such name, Caleb?”

  “That’s what we would call a nickname. There is none for Caleb, that I know of. It’s good to know what a name means. The Sioux choose names that describe a person or tell of an important event in one’s life. Some Indians even change their names after a significant experience.”

  Before he could continue, she interrupted.

  “What is your ... Sioux name?” She wanted to understand the one facet of Caleb’s past that frightened her the most.

  “The name my mother gave me was Raven’s Shadow, because my hair was so black and glossy. That was only my infant name, though. My father wanted me to have a white name as well, and so he chose Caleb. It’s a Hebrew name that means ‘bold one.’ It can also mean ‘dog.’ “

  “They all seem to suit you very well,” she laughed. “You are lucky to have so many names.”

  “Oh, I have more.” His smile had been mischievous as he continued his explanation. “My Sioux grandfather later named me, One-Who-Walks-in-Two-Worlds, for obvious reasons. And when I’m working for General Parker, I often have to assume other names.”

  “So it seems I have married many men?”

  She watched the laughter in his eyes as he lowered his lips to hers.

  “And I have just my Anja.”

  The memories faded as Analisa’s thoughts returned to the present. Today Caleb was to ride into town and return with Kase as well as his own belongings. She looked forward to welcoming her son home again, but at the same time wondered how the boy would react to Caleb’s sleeping in her bed. Analisa refused to consider the complications that were sure to arise with the three of them living together in one small room. When she voiced her worries to Caleb, he’d merely laughed at her embarrassment and said he wouldn’t mind a few more sessions in the cow shed. She had taken a swipe at him with her dish towel, but ended up laughing as she did so often now. Perhaps, after the spring rains let up and it was dry enough to cut more sod, they could add another room to the house. Analisa decided to suggest the idea to Caleb. For now she was content to watch him sleep as she continued to sort out the thoughts that had awakened her long before dawn.

  When she asked about his family, Caleb had told her the story of his father’s return to Boston after years of living out west, and his own reluctant introduction to his white heritage. A description of his years at school, his time in the army, and his friendship with Ruth followed. Analisa listened intently, trying to understand, asking questions whenever they came to mind.

  As he told her about the work he did for Ely Parker and the Bureau of Indian Affairs, she’d sensed hesitation on his part and realized Caleb was leaving many details untold. He’d avoided any mention of how he would carry out his assignments from Pella, and now his obvious omission of facts hung heavy on her mind.

  Feeling like a child, eager to be up and out of bed, Analisa forced herself to lie still a little longer. It was only an hour past dawn, but she’d been awake long before the sun gathered enough strength to force its way into the room. Analisa closed her eyes against the light, intending to give Caleb a few more minutes before she roused him ...

  “I thought you wanted to be up and about early to send me off after Kase, yet here you are sleeping away the morning.”

  Drifting back to consciousness, Analisa listened to Caleb’s soft words spoken very near her ear. She smiled, eyes closed, and threw her arm across her eyes to avoid the daylight.

  “I was awake before dawn, but you, Caleb, slept on and on until I just gave up.” A smile peeked out from beneath the downy white sleeve of her nightgown.

  “Why didn’t you wake me up?” He leaned over her and lifted her wrist slowly to uncover her eyes. Caleb then planted a kiss on her closed lips. “Is this how you really are? Too lazy to fix breakfast for your starving husband? I can’t recall the last time I sat down to a decent meal in this house. Christmas Eve, I think. I’ll have to ask Sophie to make me something while I’m in town.”

  “You must do that,” she teased. “I am getting very used to being so lazy, but if you light the stove, I will cook.”

  “That sounds fair enough.”

  “Then you must collect Kase and your things. Sophie always says she rots him. He will be very rotted by now.”

  “Rots?” Caleb stopped where he was, half out of bed, and turned to face her. “Rots him?” He repeated.

  She looked thoughtful, her brow furrowed as she tried to remember the expression Sophie used so frequently. “Ruins?” she tried again.

  Caleb thought for a moment. “Spoils?” he countered.

  “Yes! That’s what she said she does. Spoils him rots.”

  Caleb rolled his eyes toward the ceiling, stepped from the bed, and reached for the pile of clothing draped across the rocker.

  “Repeat after me.” He looked at her while standing on one leg, thrusting the other into the pantleg. “Sophie spoils Kase rotten.”

  “No.”

  “Why not?”

  “You are laughing at me.” Analisa folded her arms across her breasts and stared up at the ceiling.

  “I’m not laughing at you,” he began, engaged in the process of buttoning his shirt. “I admire your creative ability to change the language, that’s all.” When a glance in her direction warned him that she was not enjoying his joke, he, moved to the edge of the bed. “Really, Analisa, I’m not teasing you. I think it’s remarkable that you taught yourself English at all. It’s just that the way you turn words around sometimes is very ... entertaining.” He gave her a slow smile and extended a hand to help her out of bed. “I’m sorry if I hurt your feelings.”

  Unable to resist the warmth of his smile and his apparent sincerity, Analisa slipped out from beneath the covers and put her arms about his neck. She could feel the rough wool of his tweed pants through the soft cotton of her long-sleeved nightgown.

  Caleb kissed her thoroughly before relinquishing possession of her lips.

  “You do want me to go get Kase, don’t you?”

  She nodded.

  “Then you’d better get dressed and let me go.” His clear blue eyes sought the depths of hers. He was still for a moment before he added, “I have something important to tell you, so get dressed while I light the stove and start the coffee.”

  “Caleb ...” Analisa was worried by his words. Was he going to leave again soon? This time if she threw asi
de her stubborn pride and asked him to stay, would he go anyway?

  She felt cold and alone as she watched him move toward the stove, then turned away to dress hurriedly while trying to still the anxious beat of her heart.

  * * *

  “Fort Sully ...”

  Analisa repeated the name and tried it on her tongue while she sought to create a picture in her mind. Nothing materialized.

  “Where is this Fort Sully?” She met his straightforward gaze across the table, her plate of fried ham and eggs forgotten. Caleb’s “something important” was not what she expected. She had been sure that he would tell her he was leaving soon, but Caleb had surprised Analisa with the news that he wanted her to leave Iowa and move with him to Fort Sully.

  “Actually,” he said, “it’s on the Missouri River in what the army calls the Department of the Dakotas. Right now, the most flagrant misuse of Indian funds stems from that area.”

  Analisa sat in silence, not quite able to understand all Caleb said.

  Aware of her confusion, he tried to explain as briefly as he could. “At first, when General Parker gave me the assignment, I decided to go out there alone. I didn’t think it was feasible to take you and Kase along, but the more I’ve thought it through, the more it seems like a good idea. You two could provide a cover for me as well as constant contact with the fort.”

  He reached across the table and took her right hand in his. “Besides, now that I have you, I’m not so willing to give you up. For anything.”

  Analisa felt herself blush at his words. “Nor I you.” She dropped her eyes to avoid the intensity of his gaze. “But, Caleb”—she looked up again—“I never dreamed I’d leave here.” Her gaze took in the interior of the soddie. “What about my things?”

  He squeezed her hand, relieved at the lack of resistance she’d shown, and smiled reassuringly. “We’ll move everything you cannot replace and sell the rest. You’ll have to sell the livestock, too, and the homestead.”

 

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