by Beth Wiseman
“You and Annie were born right here in this house.” His father’s eyes beamed, as he nodded behind him. “But the Englisch doctor said this boppli must be born in a hospital.”
“I think that’s wise,” Daniel said just as a car turned in the driveway. “There’s Annie.” He stood up, stuffed his hands in his pockets, and waited. “And Aunt Faye.”
Daed shook his head. “Do you think she will want to come in?”
“Ya, I’m guessing so. She’ll probably want to see Mamm.” Hopefully Aunt Faye had left her baseball bat at home.
“That car looks like the ones they made before you were even born.” Daed brought a hand to his forehead as he peered at the long green car.
“It’s a station wagon,” Daniel said as both car doors opened.
“I know that.” Daed scowled at Daniel as he lowered his hand.
“Gut to have you back,” Daniel said after Annie got out of the car, toting her suitcase.
Aunt Faye followed Annie across the yard, carrying a brown paper bag on her hip. His sister slowed her steps as she neared the porch, locking eyes with their father. But when Daed stood up and held out his arms to Annie, his sister dropped the suitcase and ran to him.
Daniel still saw Annie as a little girl, and he knew their father did too. Somewhere along the line, Annie had grown into a young woman. And now she was going to be a mother.
“You can thank me later,” Aunt Faye said as she marched up the porch steps. “I’ve brought enough food to last you through the weekend, including some pickled oysters. Annie said Eve is pregnant, too, and I figure you boys probably aren’t helping out one bit.” She brushed past all of them and walked into the house.
Daniel was sure his mother would hurl if she got a whiff of pickled oysters.
It was midday on Friday when Annie opened the front door.
“I was glad to hear that you came home.” Charlotte smiled.
“Daniel had to meet his boss about an installation, but he said you would be bringing Mamm’s medicine today. Danki, Charlotte.”
She accepted the bag and motioned for Charlotte to come in. “No one is here right now, but Mamm left some money. How much was it?”
Charlotte told her the cost, and Annie paid her.
“How is Jacob?” Annie asked. “I thought he would be over here the instant he heard I was back home.”
“I feel like he is probably as confused as you are. He’s getting a lot of advice from everyone too.”
“What do you think I should do? Should I marry him?” Annie couldn’t believe she was asking an Englisch person she barely knew to chime in about a decision that would affect the rest of her life, but Charlotte had gone up against Daniel when her brother had tried to push her into marriage. Maybe Charlotte was exactly the person she needed to talk to, someone who would give Annie the answer she wanted to hear.
“I don’t know. Only you and Jacob can decide.”
“I guess I have to marry him.” Tears pooled in the corners of her eyes. “Then both of our families will be happy, and our child will grow up with two parents.” She dabbed her eyes with a tissue. “Do you think God is punishing us for what we did? I know a baby is a blessing, but having sex before marriage is wrong. And now we’re having all these problems, and . . .” She shook her head.
“One thing I learned from my time living with the Kings, that isn’t how God works. But when we’re in the midst of a crisis, sometimes we feel like God has abandoned us or that we’re unworthy of happiness. That’s never His intent—we just can’t foresee His plan for us.”
Charlotte stared into space, realizing she was ministering to herself more than Annie, and she needed to heed her own advice. “When Ryan broke up with me, I was sure it was God turning away from me, that I didn’t deserve to be happy. It hasn’t been very long since we broke up, so it still hurts, but our breakup has forced me to really dissect our relationship to figure out what went wrong.” She paused and took a deep breath. “Aside from the fact that he cheated on me.”
Annie nodded, not crying so much. “I’m sorry you were hurt.”
Charlotte shrugged. “Ryan’s the first man I ever let into my heart, and it was hard for me to trust. I’m afraid it will be even harder for me to trust someone after his betrayal. But with each day, I heal a little more. No more thoughts about chopping him up with an ax while he sleeps.”
Annie gasped, which made Charlotte laugh. “Annie, I’m kidding.” Her cell phone rang in her purse, so she fumbled around until she found it. “It’s your brother. I should probably answer it.”
“Did you have any problems getting the prescription?” Daniel asked after she said hello.
“Nope, I brought your mom’s medicine by your house, and I was just chatting with Annie.” She glanced at Annie. The poor girl hung her head.
“Gut, thank you. I’m sure she’s sitting right there so you can’t really talk, but I wanted you to know that I checked on your house on my way in to work. Everything was fine, but the door was unlocked.”
“Wow. Maybe Yvonne has already showed the house, but it would have been really early in the morning. I’ll check with her and call you back shortly. I’d left her a message about the plumbing issues.”
After she hung up, she turned back to Annie. “You’re going to be okay, no matter what you and Jacob decide.”
“I hope so.” She spoke through tears, sniffling.
“Sweetie, what is it you’re the most upset about? That Jacob really wants to marry you, not just because you’re pregnant? That he may not want to? Your father? Of being a mom?”
“All of it. If I don’t marry Jacob, I’ll be alone with a baby. If I do marry him, I’ll be with him the rest of my life.” She sighed. “We don’t get divorces. If we don’t get married, it’s my father’s wrath I fear in the long run. I know mei daed just wanted me to come home, and so he is biting his tongue about this whole situation for the moment. And he doesn’t want mei mudder upset again. And yes . . . I’m not really ready to have a boppli.” She took a deep breath.
Charlotte had to admit, the girl had a lot to be concerned about, but all this upset surely wasn’t good for the baby. “Pray about it, Annie. You’ll make the right decision.” Charlotte felt her phone vibrate in her purse. She pulled it out and eyed the number.
“I need to take this call. It’s my real estate agent—we keep playing phone tag. It’ll only take a minute. Is that okay?”
“Ya, of course.” Annie sniffled, then smoothed the wrinkles from her dress.
When Charlotte answered the phone, she told Yvonne about the door being unlocked.
“Hmm, that’s unusual. I haven’t showed the house,” Yvonne said. “However . . . I did get an odd phone call from someone asking about your house.”
“Odd how?”
“I haven’t taken any pictures, so the listing is very basic, just stating the square footage based on the tax roll, the price, and the size of the lot. And I put in the listing that the house doesn’t have electricity. But the caller—a woman—didn’t ask any questions about the details of the home. Instead, she wanted to know if I knew the man who had lived there. I told her I did not know him. Then she thanked me and hung up.”
“Hmm . . . a little odd, I guess.” Charlotte hoped Ethan hadn’t been involved with another woman. Good grief.
“We’ve set the price really low, so I think it’ll go quick. But let me know when the plumbing repairs are taken care of.”
They ended the call, and Charlotte was glad to see that Annie had stopped crying.
“Everything okay with your house?” she asked.
“Yeah, I think so. It’s just kind of strange that a random woman would ask the listing agent if she knew the owner, but then not want to know anything about the house.” Charlotte paused. “Oh well. Maybe she’ll call back and want to see it.” She looked at Annie. “I should probably go, but are you going to be okay?”
Annie nodded. “Ya, ya. Danki for coming. I know I have
a lot to think about.” She smiled a little. “And I can tell you’re trying not to influence me.”
“Well, I’m trying not to. It seems important to your brother that I don’t, and he’s right. But you do have choices.” Charlotte walked to the door, Annie following. “That’s all I’m going to say. And now, it’s time for me to get Big Red back home.”
Annie followed her to the old truck. “Big Red?” Annie chuckled. “That name seems to fit.”
Charlotte hugged her, happy that the girl had warmed up to her. But one thing still lingered in Charlotte’s mind. As she eased away, she held Annie at arm’s length. “I’m so sorry for all the lies I told last time I was here.” It was all-consuming sometimes, Charlotte’s need to be forgiven for her past choices. “Please forgive me.”
Annie smiled. “I already did.”
When his phone rang, Daniel excused himself from Bill and the other two men he was eating lunch with at the diner. He usually brought his lunch, so this was a treat to eat out, though it was later than he normally ate. He stepped onto the sidewalk outside the diner then walked around to the side of the building, feeling like a criminal. The Englisch always looked shocked when they saw an Amish person using a cell phone. They seemed to have preconceived notions about the way the Amish should and shouldn’t be—almost like they felt cheated if the Amish weren’t performing in the touristy capacity they expected.
“Hey. I talked to Yvonne, and she hasn’t shown the house to anyone, so I don’t know why the front door was unlocked. There’s nothing to take, so I’m not going to worry about it right now.”
“I’ll keep my eyes open next time I go over there. How was your visit with Annie?”
“You’d have been proud of me. I did my best not to influence her.” Daniel listened as she gave him details about their conversation.
“They wanted to get married before they knew Annie was pregnant,” he said. “So I don’t understand why everything is such a mess now.”
“In a nutshell, I think Jacob feels trapped. And I think he felt that way before he even knew there was a baby. That’s why he left in the first place. And Annie doesn’t trust Jacob anymore.”
Daniel paced back and forth, scratching his forehead. “Well, they need to get married. That’s all there is to it.”
“I disagree, but I’ve kept my promise not to sway either one of them.”
“How can it possibly be gut for them not to get married? Annie would be raising a baby on her own, and how could Jacob bond with his child?”
“Because they will resent each other. As I told you before, my mom was pregnant with me when she married my father, and trust me, I wish they’d never gotten married. Ethan and I had a pretty rough childhood, and both of us eventually ended up in foster care.”
Daniel recalled his and Annie’s childhood. It hadn’t been perfect, but there had always been love. “I’m sorry that your growing-up years weren’t gut. But Jacob and Annie have created this situation, this baby, and they both need to be responsible now.”
“It’s a decision they need to make together.”
Daniel didn’t want to argue with Charlotte. He supposed if he had grown up the way she did, he might feel different.
“Is she feeling okay?” Daniel had heard his mother throwing up at home early this morning. “Mei mamm has been really sick.”
“Annie seems okay—at least physically. Has your mother been to the doctor?”
“Ya. She will have to go often. And I think that’s part of the reason Daed has been so hard on Annie; he’s worried about Mamm too.”
“There’s a lot going on in your family right now. I will remember to keep you all in my prayers.”
“Danki. I will keep you in my prayers, too, Charlotte. You have been gut to Annie and Jacob. Do you have something specific you’d like me to pray for?”
Charlotte thought for a few moments. A week ago, she would have asked Daniel to pray that she’d become financially stable and for God to mend her broken heart. But as she watched Annie and Jacob struggling and also recalled her own childhood, she sensed her objectives beginning to shift. She was trying to accept that God hadn’t abandoned her but was just guiding her in a new direction. But it was hard to understand why she couldn’t find any peace.
“I guess, if I could ask you to pray for anything, it would be that I accept God’s plan for my life. I don’t have to understand it, but I need to trust it. God wants me to be happy, but I can’t shake the feeling that I’m not deserving yet. I’ve made so many mistakes.” She paused. “I know how that sounds, and I know in my heart that’s not how God works, but . . .”
“Charlotte, I am going to pray for you every day, that God will guide you onto the path He has chosen for you, and that you will trust Him with all your heart.”
She manhandled Big Red’s steering wheel into the Kings’ driveway, touched by the tenderness in Daniel’s voice. “Thank you. I guess I have trust issues in general, even when it comes to my faith.” She recalled the way she and Ryan used to pray together, before meals, and sometimes during the day if something was heavy on their hearts. When he’d broken up with her, she’d asked him to pray with her, that they could fix things. She’d never forget his expression, his teary eyes and blank gaze, as he said, “I already did,” as if God had given him specific instructions to walk away from her, away from the life they’d planned. And all the while, he’d been cheating on her. Maybe she was meant to catch Ryan in the act, God’s little nudge that he wasn’t the right guy for her.
“I suppose it’s hard for me to trust people, too, but I believe fiercely in God’s will,” Daniel said. “I know Edna isn’t your favorite person, but I cared about her very much. There is a side to Edna that most people don’t know. She longs to be loved, but love never seems to be enough, almost like she’s searching for an amount of love that’s not humanly possible.”
“I know several people like that. They are restless by nature and try to fill the void in their lives with all kinds of things. The search doesn’t end until they open their hearts to God’s love,” Charlotte said.
Daniel sighed into the phone. “I used to think it was you Englisch people who made things complicated. But I’m having to rethink that as I watch the situations around me unfolding.”
Charlotte put the truck in park and took the key out of the ignition. “I will pray for all of you, Daniel, but is there anything specific I can pray for, for you?”
He was quiet for a few moments, then said, “Ya. I think that I’d like you to pray that I’m able to trust again too. But only after you’ve prayed for Annie and mei mamm. They both need extra prayers right now.”
“Done. I’m going to pray for all good things for your family, and I’m going to pray that you and I both learn to trust again and that I will trust God as strongly as you do.”
“That’s a gut prayer, my Englisch friend.”
Charlotte’s heart warmed. “Are we friends now? I’m pretty sure you didn’t like me too much a couple of weeks ago.”
“I only knew you as Mary Troyer, the woman who pretended to be Amish and lied to Hannah and her family.” He paused, and Charlotte realized she was holding her breath. “But now I see someone who puts the needs of others before her own. I know it must not have been easy taking care of Lena when she went to Houston for her cancer treatments. And you’ve been very gut to Annie and Jacob. So, ya . . . I hope we’re friends now.”
“Thank you for saying that. Jacob and Annie are sweet kids. They’ll get things figured out.”
A friend. Charlotte could use one of those. Hannah had been busy with wedding plans prior to this crisis with Jacob and Annie. But even before all this, Hannah rarely called. She missed having a close friend.
“I have a question. When things settle down with Jacob and Annie, will everyone pack up their cell phones and go back to the way things used to be, using the phones mostly for emergencies?”
Daniel laughed. “I don’t know. Almost everyone has one
, especially those who do business with the Englisch. I know some of the elders have never used cell phones, and they are against them. They are farmers who still have a phone shanty that several families share. The rule is, phones of any type are for emergencies only, but it’s a rule that isn’t enforced by the bishop.”
Charlotte recalled a prior conversation. “Careful, you’ll turn into us.”
“And we can’t have that.” He laughed, but Charlotte grumbled.
“Ahhh, I left my sunglasses at your house. I knew something didn’t feel right. I gotta go back. They were a gift from Lena, and I don’t want her to think I carelessly lost them.” She pulled Big Red back onto the road, grinding the gears as she got going.
A few minutes later, Charlotte bounded up the porch steps of the Byler residence two at a time.
“Forget something?” Annie was holding Charlotte’s glasses when she answered the door.
“Yep.” Charlotte put the glasses on. “Thanks.” She turned to leave but saw Annie flinch. “What’s wrong?” She pushed the sunglasses up on her head.
“My stomach is cramping.” Annie came onto the porch and closed the screen door behind her. She bent over slightly and clutched her stomach.
Charlotte thought for a few moments. “When are you due?”
“Um . . .” Annie counted on her fingers. “July, I think.”
Charlotte stared at her. “Annie, it’s almost April. That would make you six months pregnant.”
She nodded. “Ya, I know.”
Charlotte scratched her head. “You don’t look six months pregnant. Are you sure you’re calculating correctly?”
“Nee, not for certain. But I think.”
“Have you gained much weight?” Charlotte glanced at Annie’s stomach, knowing Annie’s baggy clothes could hide a growing tummy.
“I’ve gained a little.” She cleared her throat. “But I would have thought I’d be feeling the baby moving by now.”
Charlotte tried to keep her expression from registering shock and bit her bottom lip. She wasn’t an expert on pregnancy, but the baby should be moving by now. “Are you bleeding at all?”