Ethan laughed. At first, he thought I was joking, but slowly, he began to realize that I wasn’t. “Don’t tell me you’re jealous too, babe?”
I leaned towards him to whisper in his ear. “I thought you told me you were a virgin earlier.”
Ethan laughed. “You don’t honestly think I slept with her, do you? I’m one hundred percent gay, babe,” he said and smiled at me for a few seconds. He pinched my nose and shook it left and right. “You’re so cute when you’re jealous, you know that?”
“I’m not.”
“You are.”
“I’m not.”
“Not jealous or not cute when you’re jealous?”
I thought about it. “I’m cute,” I said. “But not jealous.”
Ethan laughed again. “Both cute and jealous.”
To be honest, I found Ethan cuter than me. But I wasn’t going to tell him that yet just in case if he decided to get all cocky with me, especially when we were in front of so many people now. But him calling me cute… I knew it was nothing new but I liked it.
Our food came. When there were so much good news happening all at once, the food tasted so good. Ethan and I shared our food with each other, me taking some of his and him taking some of mine. I fed him and he fed me back too. Max and Theo were doing the same to each other. When Olivia and Nathalie saw us doing the public display of affection, they wanted the same. They asked their straight boyfriends to feed them.
Ethan’s mouth was covered with sauce, and he continued to eat like that, didn’t seem to realize it. I quickly pulled a napkin from the table and wiped his mouth for him. My obsession-with-cleanliness just decided to come out, all of a sudden.
“Oh my god,” Nathalie said. “Hey, Liam! You’re gonna spoil Eth!”
Ethan tried to take the napkin away from me.
“What are you doing?” I stopped him, using his usual tone, imitating him. “Let me do my job,” I said and continued to wipe his mouth.
He smiled and nodded. “Keep me clean, babe.”
Nathalie rolled her eyes.
We ate until we were damn full. There was so much food left that we couldn’t finish. We didn’t force ourselves, though. We left the food and waited for our stomachs to digest a bit before we began drinking. We played some casual card games together and while we were at it, we listened to Max and Theo’s stories.
Max and Theo told us many things: how they met, what they liked about each other, what they had been through, and much more. And as they did, they kept drinking. They planned to get drunk. It was okay, though. After all, it was their big day. We would be happy to take care of them.
Ethan wanted to join too. “Let me drink, babe. We’re so happy tonight. We’re part of the celebration. We should all get drunk. Together. Nathalie will take care of us. No worries.”
I wasn’t so sure about that. Because Nathalie seemed like she was trying to get wasted too, drinking nonstop with Jerry. Ethan drank but I didn’t.
“If you’re not drinking, babe, I won’t drink too,” Ethan said, putting down his cocktail.
I smiled and pushed his forehead lightly. His face was already red from the few sips of his drink. Too late if he said he wasn’t drinking. Because clearly, he was already drunk. When he reached his mouth for mine to kiss, he wasn’t really kissing. He bit my lower lip and shook it left and right, like a puppy playing with its toy. Yup. Definitely not drinking. Else, who would get us home, clean him up and put him to bed later?
The celebration was loud and happy, and would have gone on until past midnight if it wasn’t for a phone call that I decided to answer. I didn’t have much of a choice, though. It was a call from home. From my parents. From Dad. What if it was an emergency?
“Hello?” I hoped Dad could hear me.
“Liam, get home as soon as possible,” Dad said straightaway in a serious tone. “We have something important to talk about.”
I stood up, made sure Ethan was okay and walked away from the table to somewhere less noisy. “What is it about, Dad? We can talk here,” I told him.
“You,” Dad said. “But I want to talk to you face to face. Make sure you bring along your boy, Liam.”
I almost dropped my phone. What the heck did I just hear? “Wait. What, Dad?”
“You broke up with Joanna for a boy, right?”
“How did you know?”
“How could I not know?” Dad wondered. “Talk to you soon,” he said and hung up.
When I got back to the table, they all knew something had happened.
Ethan straightened up and tapped my seat beside him. I sat, my mind blank. They waited for me.
“What happened, babe?” Ethan decided to ask then, when I didn’t say anything yet. He squeezed my hand to comfort me.
“Dad wants to see me.” No. “Dad wants to see us.”
17
Him or Her
(Ethan)
I knew this day would eventually come. It was just a matter of time but never had I thought that it was going to be so quick. Liam and I weren’t together, as in, “in the relationship”, for even a week and yet, the news had already reached his parents’ ears.
I tried to come up with many possibilities. To try to think how did they find out. It wouldn’t be the pictures we had uploaded to our social media. We both had blocked both of our families’ social media. Relatives included. It wouldn’t be any of our friends either. Our parents never knew any of them apart from the ones we always hung out with. Unless coincidentally... Liam’s parents were visiting Buvekeli without telling him or they had friends here who saw us together and told them.
“You sure you wanna come?” Liam asked when we were about to sleep. It was unusually cold that night even when there was a blanket around us. It must be the alcohol I’d drank. He embraced me tightly so that I only felt his warmth.
Earlier, we’d decided that we would go after our classes tomorrow. We’d skipped quite a number of them. Skipping any more might affect our grades due to poor attendance records.
“Yeah,” I said, nestling my face into his naked chest. “I’m not gonna leave you to face them alone, babe, especially when you said your dad wants to see me.” I wanted to be there in case he got disowned too. I wanted to be the first person to be there to comfort him when he fell into a down state.
The next morning, we packed whatever we needed before going to school. We didn’t want to rush when we got back. I’d also asked my manager for an emergency leave. When we were done with our classes, the sky looked like it was about to rain soon. But we didn’t care. We were too anxious to care.
Just when we were about to hop onto my motorbike, wearing our helmets, someone stopped us. “Stop right there, both of you!”
“Nat?” Both of us stopped putting on our helmets. She came walking quickly from the direction of her apartment building.
“I’m not going to let you both go back alone and on a motorbike,” Nathalie said. She gestured towards the parking lot. “Let’s go.”
“Wait. Go where?” I asked.
“You’re not trying to leave me out on this one, are you?” Nathalie said. “I’m coming.”
“Liam’s parents asked for me. Not you.”
Nathalie smacked my head. “Where do you think you’ll sleep, huh? What if Liam gets disowned? No offense, Liam. Hotels aren’t cheap, even in Eastville or Westville, and you don’t have many choices. What if they’re all full? Don’t even think of riding the motorbike all the way back here in the middle of the night. You guys could be so broken after meeting his parents.”
Wow, that was so thoughtful of her.
“Besides, it’s going to rain soon. Are you going to meet his father drenched?” Nathalie blinked a few times, like she really wondered if we planned to do that. She left us, walking towards the direction she’d gestured to earlier.
She was right. Meeting Liam’s parents drenched wouldn’t make a good first impression. It wasn’t that I hadn’t seen them before. I’d gone to his place p
lenty of times. But all this while, I was seeing them only as Liam’s friend. This time, it would be his boyfriend.
Nathalie drove us to Westville. She didn’t mind when I sat with Liam in the back seat. Liam had been quiet since the journey began and I could understand why. There would be only two outcomes. Either his parents were going to accept him for who he was or they were going to disown him like mine. But before coming to either conclusion, a fight might break out. It might be legal to have a same-sex relationship in my country, but it wasn’t widely accepted yet by the society, especially those with higher status like mine. I worried if Liam was going to have the same issue.
As we’d predicted, it rained, and not only the highway collected water, it collected cars too, causing terrible traffic congestion. When we reached Westville, dusk was already approaching.
“You guys sure you don’t wanna rest at my place first?” Nathalie asked us again.
I looked at Liam. Liam shook his head and heaved a deep sigh. He was really anxious. I patted his chest. “It’s okay, babe.”
Liam closed his eyes and nodded.
“Nah,” I answered Nathalie. “We’ll go straight to Liam’s.”
Nathalie had gone to Liam’s place many times before, too, so she knew the way. It only took us ten minutes to reach from town. Nathalie dropped us right in front of the house. After we got out, she rolled down the window.
“Call me if anything happens, okay? I’ll take a break nearby before I go home,” Nathalie said.
“Okay, Nat. Thanks.” I waved.
Nathalie waved back and left.
Liam and I stood side by side. He took a few deep breaths. I waited for him. He took out his phone from his pocket and texted his family WhatsApp group.
Hey, Dad. I’m home. He texted. He looked at me. “You ready, babe?”
I nodded. “I am.”
Liam took my hand and pulled me as he walked towards the front door. It was only then my heart started beating rapidly. I felt what Liam was feeling. The nervousness and anxiousness. Liam opened the front door. He had the key. Together, we walked in.
In the living room, there were three people. A man and a woman sat on a couch side by side. The man was slim. He had long hair tied in a small ponytail. He looked very healthy for his age. The woman was fair and her hair was reddish-brown. She had a small mole on her left cheek. I remembered them clearly. They were Liam’s parents: Mr. and Mrs. Eastwood. In an armchair was another man. A much younger one, who carried similar features of Liam’s face, only his body was much skinnier. This person was Liam's younger brother, Michael.
The moment they saw us enter, Mr. Eastwood turned off the TV. Michael got up from the armchair and headed upstairs. As he passed by, he nodded at us, a greeting, like how I would greet my friends sometimes.
Liam took a deep breath again and together, with his hand still holding mine, and mine holding his, we walked over to face his parents. His parents stared at our hands.
“Hi, Dad, Mom,” Liam greeted when we were in front of them. “I’m home.”
They were quiet. It wasn’t a good sign. And they were still staring at us.
Liam let out another deep breath. “This is Ethan.” He gestured. “You know him. My best friend. But right now, he’s my boyfriend...”
I expected for both of them to snap. Like get mad. But surprisingly, they didn’t.
“Have a seat,” Mrs. Eastwood offered.
I looked at Liam, unsure of what to do.
Liam nodded. Together, we sat on a couch separately from his parents.
“Would you like to have a drink?” Mrs. Eastwood asked me. Wait, could it be that the reason I was called to come along was so that they could poison me?
“N-n-no, thanks, ma’am,” I stuttered.
We waited for a while. Liam’s parents were still quiet. They continued to watch us, like they were trying to read us. When Liam was getting very uncomfortable, he cleared his throat and decided to say something.
“What is it that you want to talk about, Dad?” Liam asked.
Mr. Eastwood squared his shoulders and leaned forward, then his eyes fixed on me. “My son isn’t gay,” he started, answering me as though I was the one asking. “A few weeks ago, he was still with a girl. And he was happy with her. What did you do that you...,” he tilted his head a little, like he was trying to think, “...suddenly turn him into… one?” Mr. Eastwood hadn’t raised his voice. He asked me in a very polite manner.
“Sir, I…” I didn’t know what to answer. Because if I answered “I don’t know,” it would be a lie.
“It’s not his fault,” Liam answered for me. “I chose him.”
“Chose,” Mr. Eastwood caught the word Liam had used. “Him.” His eyes were still fixed on me. Though he didn’t sound like he was asking a question, his eyes told me that he was expecting an answer. From me.
“I…”
“What happened to Joanna, honey?” Mrs. Eastwood asked Liam, saving me from having to answer Mr. Eastwood. She sounded as polite as her husband. “You don’t love her anymore? Or you never liked girls in the first place?”
“Dad, Mom,” Liam said. “Love isn’t about gender, okay? It’s about the feeling and... loving someone.”
“So you think what you’re doing now is right?” Mr. Eastwood finally turned his head to face Liam.
“I love Ethan now,” Liam said bravely. “And I do think that it is right. Love is not a sin. Love is love.”
Mr. Eastwood raised an eyebrow. “But how could you say that? He was only a friend. From high school. Why now and not then?” He looked at me again. “I’m gonna ask you one more time, kid. What did you do?”
“Dad—” Liam tried to help but Mr. Eastwood raised his finger at him, stopping him.
“Nothing.” I didn’t know what came over me. I suddenly found the courage to speak. “I loved him for five years, sir, but really, I did nothing.” I looked at Liam for a second. “I thought he was straight. He was straight all the while since I knew him. He even had Joanna. Even then, I did nothing. I—”
“Except he would risk his life for mine. Not once but twice,” Liam added, cutting me off. “Dad, Mom…” And then Liam began telling his parents the story. The story about how I protected him from some random bad guys outside our apartment and how I saved him from the evil clown outside the carnival which turned out to be a prank.
“If the clown had been real, Dad, Mom... I wouldn’t be sitting here today and talking to you,” Liam finished.
“Oh, honey. Love is more than just repaying even if it’s your life that he’d saved. You can’t pay him with yours. Love is much more than that, my son,” Mrs. Eastwood said.
“I know, Mom,” Liam said. “I know… And I know we’re more than that. We do many things together. We miss each other a lot...”
“What about Joanna?” Mrs. Eastwood asked again. “You two did many things together too. You’ve always said you miss her. All the time.”
Liam shook his head. “Not anymore,” he said and squeezed my hand. Earlier, when he told them about the clown, he never told them about what Joanna had done. “Remember the evil clown? Joanna was there with me when the clown appeared. She… she didn’t wait for me. The moment she got into her car, she drove off on her own, leaving me behind. Alone. My heart has been broken since.”
“I see,” Mrs. Eastwood said. “How could she do that?” She shook her head. “But, honey, are you sure this isn’t just a rebound? I assume you broke up with her right after that. You said so yourself. Your heart has been broken since.”
“What is your point, Mom?” Liam asked. “I… I know what I feel, okay? I mean, my heart for Joanna has been broken, but my heart for Ethan has not. Eth and I…” I realized I didn’t make any sense. It would mean that I had two hearts. For two different persons. “Look, it’s like this... I’ve been in love with two persons at the same time, but I just didn’t know it. I only realized it when Ethan confessed one night that he was into me one, when I b
egan to avoid him.”
“So much for doing nothing,” Mr. Eastwood said, his tone full of sarcasm this time.
“He was drunk,” Liam defended me. He continued his story. “When I realized he was gay and had a secret crush on me, I tried to avoid him. I was scared he would do something to me. Until I realized that I began missing him. I figured if he hadn’t done anything to me in five years, why would he now?” Liam looked at me for a second and smiled. “Many things happened. Ethan got into the hospital for protecting me. I wanted to take care of him but he started to avoid me instead. At that point in time, I didn’t know what I did wrong or why he was doing that. Later I found out that Ethan was trying to move on, but his attempt caused me so much pain. I didn’t know what was happening until I consulted a doctor. It was then I realized I had to choose between Eth and Jo. I…” Liam hesitated. He looked down, his face telling me that he was afraid of me getting disappointed with what he was about to say next.
“You chose Ethan,” Mrs. Eastwood assumed.
“No,” Liam said. “I chose Jo.” He squeezed my hand again, but this time, he didn’t let go.
I smiled and squeezed his back, assuring him that I was fine. Because in the end, he chose me.
“But she left me,” Liam continued. “At the very time when I needed someone the most. I know as her boyfriend, I should be more understanding. She was probably too scared so she might have lost her logic, lost her usual sense and was on her fight-or-flight mode. She was just a girl. But… but it just hurt me so bad. You have no idea how much pain and fear I had to go through all by myself when the clown…” Tears were collecting in Liam’s eyes, and when he closed his eyes to try hold back his feelings, a tear rolled down his cheek.
I reached my thumb to his face to wipe it. Watching him cry, it made my eyes hot and teary too.
“...when the clown almost killed me,” Liam managed to continue. “Until now I can remember how it feels. It scarred me. And when Eth just jumped in without thinking at all, even when the clown had a machete in his hand, he just… he just came in between us and fought it off for me. Without thinking about his own life. That’s when I realized who I needed. Who I really wanted.” Liam sniffled. He looked at me, his eyes red and wet. That moment, he couldn’t hold back anymore, he hugged me and cried.
A Monster's Love Page 26