What God Has For Me

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What God Has For Me Page 5

by Pat Simmons


  A Bible verse. When she attended church, the Lord seemed to plant Scriptures in her head as He was doing now. But that stopped when she became legally grown and decided to go on her own. Was God now trying to rescue her after all her years of living in sin?

  Taking a deep breath to compose herself, only made Halcyon start crying again. “Jesus, I truly am sorry for the decisions I made that put my children in the middle of this drama.”

  Once she depleted her reservoir of tears, she took a deep breath and looked in the direction of her children—still asleep. Halcyon quietly stepped out of bed and padded across the room to the bathroom. Her spacious childhood bedroom served as a studio apartment that she hoped would be temporary, if she didn’t mess up on the job with Zachary.

  Halcyon stared at her reflection in the mirror. She wasn’t the beauty she had been when she met Scott five years ago. She had been slender, shapely, thick head of hair, and glowing in her youthfulness. Thanks to childbirth, her curves had been altered. Her mother and Granny Rose said the added pounds made her look more like a woman and it took nothing away from her beauty. Of course, she never believed that. At twenty-seven, she even noticed gray strands. Oh well, her past was her past. It was time to move on.

  She wanted to shower before the children woke, so she could find that Scripture in the Bible God told her to read. Although Halcyon came out the bathroom in record time, Jonathan was already awake and quietly playing with a stuffed toy. When he noticed her, he scrambled to his feet and reached for her.

  Once she had him in her arms, she shook Ashanti. “Sleepyhead, do you want to eat?”

  “I wanna eat,” Jonathan repeated with morning breath.

  Halcyon chuckled. “All right. After that, we’re going to where Uncle Zachary works.”

  “Yay,” Ashanti suddenly said, springing up. “I love Uncle Zach.”

  “I know. He loves you, too.” And me, too, apparently. Halcyon didn’t know how awkward things would be between them now because of three simple words that he couldn’t take back.

  “Mommy, can I bring my books?”

  “Yes, baby.” Ever since her daughter learned she was going to pre-school, Ashanti loved carrying books so she could be like the big kids she saw at bus stops.

  Ashanti raced to her stack of coloring books and box of jumbo crayons.

  “Let’s eat and get cleaned up first,” Halcyon told her daughter. She quickly washed their faces and hands. Halcyon supervised her daughter’s tooth brushing techniques while she cleaned the baby’s teeth.

  When they walked into the kitchen, her mother was finishing her cup of coffee. Working part-time, her mother was dressed and ready to leave. After receiving hugs from her grandbabies, Sarah swiped a kiss on Halcyon’s cheek. “Enjoy your first day for everything.” She smiled, took her keys off the counter, then waved goodbye.

  “Bye, Grandma.” Her children waved.

  Halcyon hurried her children during breakfast instead of allowing them to play with their food, coaxing them to eat every bite. Even though Zachary was being generous, he was still a business man who had a company to run, so she wanted to get to Baer Electronics sooner rather than later, and earn the fifty thousand dollar salary he was paying her blindly. That was twice what she was making.

  Back upstairs, she quickly bathed and dressed them. Halcyon brushed Ashanti’s hair into two ponytails, then observed her children. No one could ever accuse her of not providing for her children with food, shelter, or clothes.

  She, on the other hand, had neglected herself when it came to personal pampering. Inside her closet, Halcyon surveyed the few business suits she could still fit. Most of her clothes were practical to keep up with two small children. She couldn’t remember the last time she was in a dress and pantyhose, so on the spur of the moment, she decided to dress to impress her boss, even if she wore the same coordinates for a week.

  Ashanti and Jonathan seemed entertained by her dilemma of changing three times before deciding on a powder blue suit. Next, she dreaded the time she would need to apply full makeup instead of the normal blush and lipstick. “Keep an eye on your brother.”

  “Okay, Mommy,” Ashanti said, but didn’t look up from the page she was coloring.

  All she needed was for them to run into the bathroom while she was using her eyeliner. Last was her hair. The ponytail was practical, but since she was going all out, she opted to brush it out and let it lay on her shoulders. She glanced at the time: ten-thirty. “Finally.” She exhaled as she scrutinized her appearance, then sent Zachary a text: Ready.

  I wish I was there to pick up my three special people, but Raymond is standing by. See you soon.

  Zachary’s mechanic arrived a half hour later as Halcyon was packing up snacks for the children. “Hi, Miss Holland, Zach already put the children’s car seats in the back. I’ll take that,” Raymond said, reaching for Jonathan’s diaper bag and the small rolling backpack of snacks and toys to occupy her children while she learned her job.

  While on the way to the store, Halcyon made small talk with the man she had met a few times. The fact was that she was nervous, not because of the first day jitters. Every woman wanted a man to tell her he loved her, but coming from Zachary, she was caught off guard, especially since she felt something.

  Raymond turned into the parking lot of the strip mall that housed Baer Electronics as an anchor store. Zachary Bishop was another African-American success story, handsome, a committed Christian and financially secure. According to Desi, Zachary had even put down money for Michael to start a franchise in an attempt to help his brother get away from the environment where the “crime of infidelity was committed”—Desi’s words.

  Halcyon scrutinized her new place of employment. She had only been inside for the grand opening many years ago and then one other time with her mother when Zachary insisted she pick out a new high def TV for Mother’s Day. The man was definitely a prince. She couldn’t deny that.

  “Go on in, Miss Holland, they’re expecting you. I’ll bring your things and the car seats in,” Raymond said after parking.

  Thanking him, she did just that. With Jonathan in one arm and holding Ashanti’s hand, Halcyon smiled when one of the employees greeted her at the door like a maître d instead of a fellow coworker.

  “Hi, Miss Holland, we’ve been expecting you. Welcome aboard. Please follow me to your office.” As she trailed the woman, Halcyon craned her neck trying to locate Zachary. She had expected him to be greeting her. When she stopped at the doorway of her office, her mouth dropped open. Her “office” was bigger than her spacious bedroom. One side of the floor was covered with colorful large square carpet pieces while the other side was white tile.

  The carpet had kiddie furniture for Ashanti to sit and color her cartoon books to her heart’s content, and a chest of toys that were normally seen stocked in a pediatrician’s office. “And to think I dragged an arsenal of toys with me,” she mumbled as released her son into the wild of the toys. “Wow.”

  “Yeah, we had to scramble to get it done this morning, but Mr. Bishop compensated us well,” the employee, whose nametag read Lynette, said. The woman didn’t seem bothered at all by the last minute inconvenience.

  Halcyon blinked. “What do you mean? This isn’t an employee’s daycare room?”

  “No,” Zachary said, walking up behind her. He kissed her cheek before she could turn around to look at him. While the children ran to him, Halcyon had more time to gather her thoughts on how to respond to him. Finally, she pivoted on her heel and nearly fainted. The tender look, the clothes, but it was the twinkle in his eyes that captured her into a trance she couldn’t pull away from. Plus, his cologne was drugging her. Only when she heard his voice, could she move. “I hope you like it.”

  Again, her eyes misted—she had to stop these crying binges—as Zachary lifted Ashanti in one arm and Jonathan in the other. “I do.” Shaking her head, Halcyon stuttered to correct her bad word choice. That’s what Zachary would eventually want
from her. “It’s very nice.”

  “And you look…” Zachary’s nostrils flared as he closed his mouth. When his lips parted, the words seemed to float out. “Breathtaking.” He gave an appreciative stare. “Ah, make yourself at home, I’m going to introduce two of my three favorite people to the staff and give them a tour,” he turned, taking her children with him and leaving her alone with Lynette.

  “Well, have fun, Miss Holland.” Lynette turned to leave.

  “Thank you, and please call me Halcyon. I was named after my father.” She always explained her unique name when introducing herself in an attempt to keep people from butchering it. She liked being her dad’s namesake, especially after he passed away. Just like Beyoncé had grown into her name, Halcyon liked to think she had as well, but when Zachary called her Bridget, it made her want to go by H. Bridget Holland.

  She strolled to her desk and rested her purse. Unlike the “toy room” several feet away, only one item held her attention, a large vase of flowers, bursting with colorful energy. She fingered the orange petals and inhaled its fragrance. She smiled. Halcyon couldn’t remember the last time she received flowers, not counting the ones Jonathan pulled out her mother’s garden.

  Halcyon flopped in the chair and rolled herself closer to the desk where some files were stacked, possibly waiting for her attention. A computer that looked as if Zachary had just gotten it off his showroom floor was already on.

  When Zachary returned and stuck his head in the doorway, he leaned against the doorframe and folded his arms. So many things were going through Halcyon’s mind like ‘Do you really love me?’ They were in a stare dual until he finally smirked. What had he been thinking? she wondered.

  “Absolutely gorgeous.” He let her know without her asking. Zachary winked, then disappeared again.

  Frowning, Halcyon didn’t realize she had been holding her breath until she exhaled. “God, how am I going to resist him?” For some reason, that question made her think about the Lord answering her earlier with a Scripture, which she had yet to read. She would, but not now.

  Looking for a distraction, Halcyon glanced around her work space again. Although the severance pay from her now defunct company had given her more time to nurture her children after Jonathan was born, she didn’t realize until now how much she had missed corporate America, and there was even a window.

  A young woman, who appeared to be about the same age as Halcyon, pranced into the room with a smile. Judging from the woman’s coordinating sleeveless top and pants, Halcyon was definitely overdressed, but she couldn’t help it. It was only for one day.

  “Hi, I’m Paisley like the print fabric. You know, Daisy except with a ‘P’.

  And Halcyon thought she had name recognition issues. “Hi, Halcyon Holland.” She explained how she got her name, then added, “But don’t be surprised if you hear Zachary call me Bridget. That’s my middle name.”

  Paisley eyed the flowers, then stepped closer to shake Halcyon’s hand. “Well, it’s good to meet the woman behind the man. And those children are adorable. Zachary is the proud papa. I didn’t even know he had children.”

  “He thinks they’re his.” Halcyon chuckled.

  The shocked expression on Paisley’s face made Halcyon realize how her statement sounded. Glancing over her shoulder, her new coworker stepped closer and lowered her voice. “You mean Mr. Bishop doesn’t know they’re not his? Wow, well I won’t say anything, girlfriend.”

  Girlfriend after one minute? Halcyon considered which way she wanted this conversation to go: let coworkers think she and Zachary were an item and she cheated on him, or let them know she was an unwed single mother. In the end, she wasn’t interested in adding to her circle of confidantes. She had two sisters for that.

  “Paisley, thanks for introducing yourself.” Halcyon stood. “I better go find the boss so I can get started.” Dismissing herself, Halcyon strutted out of her own office.

  She found Zachary in the electronics section where the flat screens were on display. Zachary was stretched out on one of several sofas designed for clients, watching cartoons with the children. The bunch looked as if they were sitting in her living room. All they needed was a box of popcorn. She thought she was quietly sneaking up on Zachary, but he suddenly turned and met her eyes. He covered his lips with a finger to shush her, then stood.

  Folding her arms, Halcyon tried to look intimidating as Zachary came round and towered over her. “So, what do you think you’re doing?” she asked in a normal tone as if nothing had changed between them. Well, at least, not for her and she was sticking to that story.

  “Flirting with my new hire.” His lips curved upward. That’s when she noticed the slightest dimple. Actually, she had noticed it a long time ago, but ignored it.

  Halcyon did her best not to flirt back and keep a straight face. She wanted to smack him for putting her through this emotional change. “I’m talking about Jonathan and Ashanti. You have to work and you can’t entertain them all day.”

  “I’ll have you know these are potential patrons and I’m giving them a product demonstration.”

  “Good point.” Her laugh broke the ice. Once the moment passed, Halcyon needed a safe topic between them. Immediately, she thought about the Scripture. “I experienced something this morning.”

  Zachary frowned. His concern seemed to stand at attention. “Oh? What happened?”

  Halcyon glanced around the showroom. Customers were everywhere. Evidently, business was brisk, so she whispered. “Well, let’s just say I’m ready to move on.”

  “Yes!” In a surprising move, Zachary knelt.

  “What do you think you’re doing? Get up.” Smacking him on his shoulder, Halcyon used all her strength to yank him into a standing position. She hoped no one saw Zachary’s stunt.

  “You said you were ready to move on,” he argued. “Thank You, Jesus. It’s about time…”

  Gritting her teeth, she made a peace sign with two fingers and gestured between her eyes and his. “Stay with me, Bishop. This has nothing to do with our conversation last night. I’m talking about with God.”

  “Woman, don’t mess with my head.” Zachary rested his hands on his waist.

  “Look who’s talking. You messed with mine last night.” His serious expression was rather amusing. She cleared her throat. “Well, Mr. Bishop, where do you want me to begin?”

  “Begin by calling me by my name. I hired you to manage my three companies. I’m giving you an executive order to be the boss.” He turned around and got the children’s attention. They scrambled off their spot and came to him with no fuss. He heaved Jonathan over his head and steadied him on his shoulders. Ashanti’s hand hatched onto Halcyon’s, but the child kept her eyes on Zachary as if she was waiting impatiently for a turn. Her daughter better not think about asking for a ride on her shoulders. Mommy carried you for nine months, little girl. No pony or shoulder rides are coming from me.

  “Come on, I’ll walk you back to your office and give you the password to get into the program we use. My car business really needs the most oversight, since I spend most of my time here. I still want to hear about what God said to you.”

  She nodded. Back in her office, she gave Zachary the Scripture and he pulled it up from his Bible app on his smartphone. Psalm 8:4. “‘What is man, that thou art mindful of him? And the son of man, that thou visits him?’ It sounds like you were questioning God about something and He let you know how special you are to Him… and me.” Without adding another word, he left her office.

  Did God know how long it had been since she felt special? Mother’s Day didn’t count. Anyway, down to business. As long as Zachary stayed out of her personal space, she was able to acclimate herself to the businesses’ procedures and guidelines. For almost two hours, amazingly, the toys occupied her children. When they became antsy, she joined them on the carpet and shared snacks with them.

  Tomorrow, she would definitely return to mommy attire where she could get down and play with
them and not worry about running her stockings or about her skirt climbing up her thighs. She did catch glimpses of Zachary checking her out as if he hadn’t seen her in a dress before.

  Not long after they ate, Jonathan was the first to doze, then Ashanti began to rub her eyes. Halcyon couldn’t believe she planned for everything else but a nap. She would have to buy sleeping bags.

  Zachary walked in and shook his head. “Man, I forgot about nap time. We’ll get them cots this evening. In the meantime, let me run down to Kmart and get some comforters for them.”

  “Thank you”—Halcyon swallowed—“for loving them so much.”

  “I always will, Bridget,” Zachary whispered, then walked out.

  Less than a half hour later, he was back with two twin-size, cartoon print comforters. In unison, they worked carefully to get the children comfortable without waking them. Halcyon’s heart melted watching Zachary’s tenderness. He would be her choice of a man to fall in love with again, but Halcyon was scared. She tried not to think about it, but she couldn’t help but make the comparison. Why was this man more concerned about her and the children than their own father?

  “This may not be a good idea.”

  “We’ll make it work, Bridget.”

  “Ah, I was wondering if some of what I do can be done telecommuting.”

  “Sure, and you don’t have to work eight hours. The children have to get adjusted. Let’s start off five to six hours for three days a week and the other two at home.”

  “Thank you, Zach…” she choked.

  He held her hand. “Listen, I don’t want to overwhelm you with the job or my feelings. I’m not asking for you to love me back—yet, but I want you to see me in a different light and let your feelings develop from there. All I ask is that you be you, the Bridget I love, and when you’re ready to move on in here”—he freed his hand and placed it over his heart— “I’ll be waiting. But don’t take much longer. I’m not getting any younger.”

  She survived the first day on the job, but her emotions were another thing. Later that night cuddled up in her bed with Jonathan on one side and Ashanti on the other, she called Desi to help her sort out everything. “How do you do it?” she asked when her sister answered.

 

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