He was right about one thing, though, and Apollo had seen that, as had the others. It would be impossible for the fleet to survive a unified attack from the base ships and the ground base on Gomoray. In a way, they had Baltar to thank for the fact that they had survived the attack of the three base ships. Baltar could have summoned up an attack force from Gomoray, but he had not known about the Pegasus and he had thought, correctly, that his force alone was enough to destroy the Galactica and its fleet of defenseless ships. Had he been concerned only with achieving his objective, he might have been more thorough and called the ground base for assistance, but Baltar wanted glory. Adama knew him well. He wanted to impress his Cylon superiors. Now that he knew he was going up against not one, but two battlestars, Baltar would doubtless muster as large a force as he could. Even now, they were probably regrouping and preparing their battle plan, making ready for another attack. This time, Adama knew, they would not have the advantage of surprise. This time, the Cylons would be ready for them and they would not retreat.
He turned back to Cain.
"I'd like to see you in my quarters, Commander."
There was no time for small talk. Cain got right to the point.
"Look, Adama, if you're worried about a repetition of that tanker incident—"
"That's precisely what I am worried about," said Adama heatedly. "I'm a great admirer of your strategic genius, Cain, but yours is a history of individual initiative. Not teamwork. I'm not sure you really understand our problem. We're not at war with the Cylons anymore, not in the sense you seem to think we are. That war is over and we lost. I'm not concerned with winning military victories, Cain, I don't care about Gomoray beyond getting the fuel we so desperately need. I'm fighting a war of survival."
Cain sighed. "Adama, I can't lie to you. I want to win. Just surviving isn't enough for me. Nothing would please me more than taking Gomoray and running up our flag, but I know now that's impossible."
"Do you? Do you fully comprehend the liability of having to fight a military campaign while protecting a fleet of one hundred and twenty civilian ships?"
"Adama, believe me, I know how you feel. I know what you're up against and have been up against ever since you left Caprica burning behind you. I know it couldn't have been easy. I don't want to make it any more difficult for you. The very heart of my plan is to use the Pegasus to divert those base ships away from you, to give you the chance to return to the fleet with enough fuel to put you safely out of their range."
"I appreciate your good intentions," said Adama. "I just don't want any more surprises. I can't afford them."
"Then the mission is a go?"
"I don't really have any choice, do I?"
"No, old friend. I'm afraid you really don't."
"I only know that you'll be taking an incredible chance," said Adama. "And that if you fail, it will be all over for us."
"I won't fail."
"I hope you know what you're doing."
"I believe in what I'm doing," said Cain.
"That's not the same thing," Adama said.
"Perhaps not. But it's all I've got. It's all you've got, too."
"Yes," said Adama, "I'm afraid so. Good luck, Cain."
"And to you."
Cain left the room. Outside, Tolen and his two aides fell in step with him. They moved briskly, heading toward the Galactica's one fully operational landing bay. Cain heard the sound of running footsteps and turned to see Cassiopeia catching up to them. She was out of breath.
"Cain . . . what is it? What's happening? I just heard you were returning to the Pegasus."
"That's right."
"I was hoping we could talk . . ."
"And I was hoping you'd say that, Cassi. But this just isn't the time. I'm sorry."
"I could ride over to the Pegasus in your shuttle."
"I'm afraid not. It'll be safer for you here. Besides, I don't think they can spare you."
"Safer?" Cassiopeia's eyes grew wide with alarm. "Why? What are you planning to do?"
"It's a mission, Cassi. Nothing we can't handle, but it's no place for civilians."
"Who's a civilian? We're all fighting for our lives. You must need more medical techs aboard the Pegasus. Take me with you."
"Cassi . . .You'll understand later. Just trust me. Please."
Cain leaned forward and kissed her lightly on the lips.
"Commander," Tolen said uneasily.
"Yes, right away. Cassi, I'll be back. You know that. Try to spend some time with Sheba."
"How can I?" said Cassiopeia miserably. "She hates me."
"Try. I love you, Cassi."
He turned and hurried away with his party, without looking back.
Cassiopeia wanted to run after him, but she knew it would be pointless. There was nothing she could say, nothing she could do that would deter him from whatever it was he had decided upon. That was how Cain was. But there had been a time when she had known another Cain, one very different from the man whom everyone called "the living legend."
It had not been all that long ago, but it seemed to Cassiopeia that she had lived a lifetime since then. So much had happened since that time when an eighteen-year-old socialator had met a broken man in a tavern on Caprica.
She had not known then, when they first met, that he was the celebrated Commander Cain of the Battlestar Pegasus. All she knew was that he was a man in a great deal of pain.
He was sitting all by himself in a shadowed corner, his hands cupped around a goblet of baharri, but he seemed to have forgotten all about his drink. He didn't seem to be at all aware of his surroundings. He sat very straight and very rigid, eyes staring but not seeing anything. At first she thought that he was drunk and would have passed him by, but then she saw how clear his eyes were. She stood right in front of him, but he hadn't seen her. He seemed to be looking inward, at something that was torturing him. Tears were flowing down his cheeks. Cautiously, she had moved closer, then sat down beside him.
"Are you all right?" she had asked him.
He had not replied. Gently, she placed her hand on his right forearm. He turned toward her, eyes focusing upon her face. She saw a momentary flicker of surprise, then puzzlement.
"I beg your pardon?" he had said. His voice seemed perfectly calm and controlled.
"I asked you if you were all right."
"Oh. Why, yes, I'm fine." He frowned slightly. "Why do you ask?"
"Well . . ." she hesitated. "For one thing, you're crying."
He raised his hand to his face and felt the tears. He swallowed and looked down at his hands, still cupping the goblet.
"I was not aware of it," he said softly.
"Perhaps if you talked about it?" she suggested.
He wiped his eyes.
"No. No, I don't think so. Thank you just the same, though."
He placed some bills on the table and slid them toward her. She looked down at them, then back at him. She didn't say anything and made no move to take the money.
"I—I'm dreadfully sorry," he stammered. "I seem to have made an embarrassing mistake. I thought you were . . ." He decided not to compound the mistake any further.
"What if I am?" she said.
"I'm afraid I don't understand."
"I did not ask you for money. Whatever it is you're feeling, I don't think you could buy your way free of it."
The corners of his mouth twitched slightly. "No, you're right there."
He took the money back.
"You know, sometimes it helps to talk to a total stranger," Cassiopeia said. "It's not like burdening a friend with your troubles. And I'm a very good listener."
He remained silent.
"What have you got to lose?" said Cassiopeia.
"That's true," said Cain. "I've already lost everything."
He began to open up to her, hesitantly at first, and then it all came bursting forth in a torrent of emotion. He had been off on a military campaign and while he had been gone his wife had taken ill and
died. He was a dedicated soldier and, as such, had little time to spend at home with his family. He had lived for the day when the war with the Cylons would finally be over and he would be able to return to Caprica, to his family, and now his wife, the only woman he had ever loved, was gone. Her love had been what kept him going and without her he was shattered. As he spoke, the tears began to flow again and soon he was sobbing openly, unashamedly. Cassiopeia could tell that he was not a man who cried easily.
They did not become lovers, not at first. What Cain needed was a friend, someone he could talk to and lean on for support, and Cassiopeia was happy to provide that for him. They saw each other often; they would talk late into the night, sharing their experiences with each other. Many times, they would get together at his home and it was there that Cassiopeia met Sheba for the first time.
They were about the same age and, from the holographic projections Cain had shown her, Cassiopeia could see how much Sheba resembled her mother. Even then, at that young age, Cassiopeia had understood why Cain was unable to share with Sheba what he shared with her. Sheba was the image of her mother and a constant reminder to Cain of the woman he had loved and lost. He blamed himself for his wife's death, even though the doctors had told him that there was nothing that he could have done. The disease had been without a cure. Still, Cain felt an enormous amount of guilt over the fact that he had not been with her when she died and, as a result, he found it very difficult to spend much time with his daughter. He understood the situation, but time had not yet healed his wound enough for him to overcome it and he blamed himself for failing Sheba, as well.
Sheba idolized her father and, though she could share his grief, she felt frustration at not being able to help him. This frustration grew into resentment. She resented Cassiopeia for being able to give her father something she could not, and she was angry at her for taking her father away. This anger turned to hatred when, after a time, Cain and Cassiopeia became lovers.
Cain changed after a time or, rather, he became his old self once again. When he was called back to duty, the best therapy in the world for him, he once again became the iron-willed commander of the Pegasus and, though they still shared their special closeness, Cassiopeia was never again to see his vulnerability. For a short while, Cain had shown Cassiopeia his inner self. She had helped him to pull himself back together once again and, when they parted, it was with the understanding that he would return to her and then they would see where their relationship would lead. While he was gone, having taken his daughter with him to train as a cadet, Cassiopeia went about her daily life, dreaming of the day he would return and hoping that she would find a way to overcome Sheba's ill feeling for her. Then she heard that they had perished at the Battle of Molecay.
Back then, she had thought the world had ended. She never suspected that her world would literally end when the Cylons attacked the colonies and wiped them out. She had been lucky to survive and luckier still to find a berth aboard the Galactica. When she met Starbuck for the first time, she had been attracted to him and it had not been until much later that she realized how much of the attraction had been due to the fact that, in many ways, he reminded her of Cain. The two men were different, but she imagined that when Cain had been much younger, he must have been very much like Starbuck. They both possessed forceful, dynamic personalities, a great deal of energy, and both were brash, prone to taking risks. Now she felt herself torn between them and she did not know what to do.
Starbuck had been very understanding. He had not pressured her to choose and, although he tried not to show his jealousy, she knew he must have felt it. Then, too, there was a vulnerability in Starbuck that he kept hidden, just like Cain. It didn't make matters any easier that they were all in a great deal of danger. She loved two men and either one or both of them could die within the next few centons. In a way, Cassiopeia envied them. They only had to fight one war.
The bridge of the Galactica was as busy as it would be during a red alert. Athena and Omega manned their consoles, taking reports from damage control and co-ordinating efforts to secure needed raw material from the other ships in the dilapidated fleet. Fortunately, the Cylons had concentrated their attack on the battlestar, hoping to destroy their greatest threat first so that they could then dispose of the remainder of the fleet at their leisure. Thanks to the Pegasus, the fleet had escaped damage from the Cylon attack, with only a few ships taking hits from incidental fire. Only those most severely damaged would be scavenged for material to repair the Galactica. Accommodations would become even more crowded, but no one would complain. They were happy to have survived.
"Commander Cain has just departed for the Pegasus, sir," said Colonel Tigh.
Adama nodded thoughtfully. "I wonder if we'll ever see him again," he said quietly.
Tigh frowned. "But I thought you felt his plan was sound."
"It was the only plan we had," replied Adama. "I'd give anything to have an alternative."
"But you're sending Apollo with the ground assault team," said Tigh.
"Yes," Adama said. "I am."
He sat down in his chair, leaned back and closed his eyes. Tigh did not envy him. He had had a brief taste of what it was like to command a battlestar and, brief though it had been, it had been enough. Perhaps Cain got all the glory, Tigh thought, but Adama was the real hero. It was a role he never wanted, but he had accepted it because there had been no one else. If they managed to find Earth, Adama would be hailed as a savior, but at that moment, Tigh knew that he would trade it all just to get a night of peaceful sleep.
CHAPTER EIGHT
Boomer glanced up at Apollo as he strapped on his laser holster. They were in the pilots' ready room, gathering together the gear that they would need for their infiltration mission.
"Look," said Boomer, licking his lips nervously, "what are our chances of coming out of this thing? I mean, it sounds crazy. Walking right into a Cylon city . . . What do you think the odds are?"
"You really want to know?" Apollo said.
Boomer snorted. "Yeah. That's what I thought."
Apollo's face was grim. "You want to back out? No one will blame you if you do."
Boomer straightened up and put his hand on Apollo's shoulder.
"Hey, friend—where you go, I go. Okay?"
Starbuck entered the ready room, carrying a large equipment bag. From it he withdrew several extra laser pistols and handed them to Boomer and Apollo.
"I checked out a little extra firepower for this mission," Starbuck said. "I figured we would need it."
"Sounds really encouraging," said Boomer, strapping the other pistol onto his opposite side, so that he could use one in either hand if need be.
"This where we report in for the mission?" said Bojay, entering with Sheba.
"What do you mean?" asked Apollo.
"We've been assigned to the Galactica ground force."
"By whose orders?" said Apollo.
"My father's," Sheba said. She dropped her equipment bag on the floor and started to get into her jump suit. "We are, after all, the only people in this room familiar with the target. It would help to have some idea where you're going, wouldn't it, Captain?"
"You've been there? On the ground?"
"No," said Sheba, "but we've been over it many times in our hit-and-run missions on the ground base. Since we'll be making free-flight jumps, it won't be that much different. I'll know just where to bring us down."
"No reflection on your abilities," said Apollo, "but I'm just a little puzzled. It doesn't sound like your father, risking you on a . . ." he hesitated.
"One-way mission?" Sheba said.
Starbuck cleared his throat. "Ah, look lady, no offense, but this kid doesn't go on one-way missions. And I don't take too kindly to heroes who start out planning on not coming back."
"Sorry," Sheba said. "I'm just being a realist."
"If we were realists, we'd all be dead back on Caprica," said Starbuck. "Where's our medical tech? I want to get going
before I start to get the jitters."
"We're not taking one," said Sheba.
"What?"
"I said, we're not taking one. We won't have time to stop for wounded. We're going to have to get in and out as fast as possible."
Starbuck forced a smile. "Okay. That's all right, too. My kind of mission . . . short."
"You're an optimist," said Sheba.
"Like to make a little side bet that we make it?" Starbuck asked.
Their eyes met.
"What's the side bet?" Sheba asked.
"Oh, why don't we make it something real personal?" said Starbuck, his eyes not leaving hers.
Sheba's lips curved up in a half smile. "Bad idea, Lieutenant. You wouldn't want me to throw the mission just to avoid paying up, would you?"
She finished fastening the closures on her jump suit and left along with Bojay.
"Interesting lady," Starbuck said.
Boomer shook his head in disbelief.
"You're something else, Starbuck," he said. "You can think of sex at a time like this?"
"Later on, I may not have the time," said Starbuck. "Besides, the way my luck's been running, she probably will throw the mission just to frustrate me."
Apollo grinned. "Starbuck? Frustrated?"
"Yeah. Remember, you heard it here first."
They suited up and picked up the remainder of their gear. Together, they headed for the elevator that would take them down to the landing bays. They all remained silent on the way down, each keeping his thoughts to himself. The odds were heavily against them. And there was no comfort to be derived from the knowledge that if they didn't make it, chances were that no one else would either. As they stepped off the elevator, Cassiopeia was waiting for them.
"Starbuck, I have to talk to you."
"You picked a great time," he said. "We're ready to launch."
"That's what I want to talk to you about. I know about your jump. Where are they sending Cain?"
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