by Jane Graves
“You’ve flown with Lisa, so a commercial plane will be no problem.”
“Yeah. That’s what I figured.”
The kid sounded tense, but Adam didn’t think it had anything to do with the plane ride. Gabrio’s life had been turned upside down in the past week, and tomorrow he’d be faced with yet one more unfamiliar situation. In the end, he was going to have a life far better than the one he’d left, but it was still going to take some getting used to.
“I guess you’re probably a little uptight about going to live in a new place,” Adam said.
There was a long silence. “Maybe a little.”
“My family will meet us at the airport. It’ll be a little strange at first, I know. But everything’s going to be okay.”
“Yeah. I know.” He paused. “I just wish Sera was coming with us.”
Adam closed his eyes. So do I.
Even though he was doing the right thing, for some reason it still felt wrong. But how could it be wrong to want her to have the best life possible, even if it meant that he couldn’t be part of it?
When they were at the hospital, Sera had seen a job posting for an obstetrical nurse. She’d talked to the supervisor and gotten the job, which meant she’d be moving to Monterrey very soon. He was glad, at least, that she wouldn’t be returning to live in Santa Rios. She’d be taking a job she was going to love, and she’d be living in a big city, where she’d have the opportunity to meet a lot of other people.
To meet a lot of other men.
“She has her new job here,” Adam said.
“Couldn’t she get a job in San Antonio?”
“She could, I guess. She’s just not going to.”
“Why not?”
Adam sighed. “It’s complicated.”
No. Actually, it’s very simple. You can’t let go of the past long enough to give her what she wants. What she needs. What she deserves.
Down the hall Adam heard the muffled sound of an elevator bell as it reached their floor, the soft whoosh of the doors as they opened. Then silence again. And he couldn’t stand it.
Every moment that ticked away brought him closer to that good-bye tomorrow, and the very thought of it made him sick. Someday, maybe very soon, Sera was going to meet another man who would realize what an incredible woman she was, a man who would lay the world at her feet.
A man who would have the family with her that could have been his.
“She’s pretty,” Gabrio said.
“Uh-huh.”
“Nice.”
“Yeah. I know.”
“Do you love her?”
The kid might as well have shot him right in the heart. The answer was yes. More than ever. Distance wasn’t going to change that. Neither was time. The world could pass away to dust, and still he was going to love her. And the longer he lay there, the more intolerable the thought of life without her became.
“Yeah. I love her.”
“So why isn’t she coming with us?”
“I know this is hard to understand,” Adam said, “but sometimes there are a lot of other things to consider besides love.”
“Like what?”
All at once, Adam didn’t have an answer to that question. He lay there motionless, trying to conjure up some kind of response, but he couldn’t. It was as if the reasons he was walking away from Sera, the ones that had been carved in granite, were suddenly scribbled in sand. And with every moment that passed the words seemed to shift, to fade, until finally a mental wind came and blew them away altogether. Suddenly he couldn’t think of a single thing to take into consideration but love.
“Does she love you?” Gabrio asked.
“Yeah. She does.”
“But she wants to stay here?”
“No. Not exactly. She—”
She wants to marry you. To have a family. To follow you wherever you go. To love you for the rest of your life.
“She wants to come with me,” Adam said, a note of awe in his voice, as if it had taken until that moment for the magnitude of it to finally hit him.
“And you’re not letting her?” Gabrio shook his head. “Don’t take this wrong, man. But you must be crazy or something.”
Adam realized that for the first time in ages he was lying awake in the dark, unable to sleep, but not because he couldn’t banish the traumatic thoughts that had consumed his life for the past three years. He was lying awake because he loved Sera so much that he couldn’t stop thinking about her. The only trauma he was obsessed with now was the thought of never seeing her again.
Under any other circumstances, he’d never be presumptuous enough to tell her that she didn’t know her own mind, that she couldn’t make her own decisions, that she didn’t know what was good for her and what wasn’t. So why was he telling her that now?
He closed his eyes and pictured Sera.
Then he pictured his life without her.
He tossed back the covers and sat up on the edge of the bed. Gabrio was right. He must be crazy. In the room next door was a beautiful young woman he should be thanking God for instead of pushing away.
He flipped on the lamp, groaning a little at the pain in his shoulder.
“Something wrong?” Gabrio asked, blinking against the bright light.
“Yeah,” Adam said. “Something’s wrong. But it won’t be for much longer.”
He rose from the bed, wearing nothing but the bottoms to the pair of pajamas that Sera had bought for him while he was in the hospital.
“Where are you going?” Gabrio asked.
“To Sera’s room.”
“Oh, yeah?”
“I might not be back for a little while. Will you be all right here by yourself?”
“Sure.”
Adam started toward the door, then turned back. “Actually, I—”
“What?”
Oh, hell. This was probably a really bad example to set for a kid, but what else could he do? “I . . . uh . . . I might not be back until morning.”
Gabrio rose on one elbow. “Does this mean Sera’s going with us to San Antonio?”
“It’s up to her. I just hope to God she hasn’t changed her mind.”
“Then make it good, man. This is not the time to mess up.” With a furtive smile, Adam left the room, closing the door behind him. He couldn’t have imagined a time in his life when he’d be taking advice on romance from a sixteen-year-old kid, but there it was. And it was pretty good advice at that.
He went to the room next door and knocked gently. After a moment, the door opened slightly and Sera peered out, a worried expression on her face.
“Adam? What is it? Is something the matter?”
Without a word, he pushed the door open and came inside, closing it behind him. He turned, and in the dim lamplight he got a good look at Sera and his mouth went dry.
She was wearing a blue nightgown, the same one she’d had on in the bedroom at her house. He remembered how she’d slid her robe off her shoulders, revealing that blue fabric clinging to every beautiful curve of her body. He hadn’t been able to take his eyes off her then, and he couldn’t take his eyes off her now.
“God,” he murmured, staring down at her.
“Adam? What’s the matter?”
“Sera, I . . .”
But words wouldn’t come. Not one. He had so much to say that it got all tangled up in his mind. Instead, he slowly raised his hand to her shoulder and hooked his thumb beneath the narrow strap of her nightgown. He pushed it aside, watching as it fell against her upper arm. Leaning in, he kissed the spot where it had been.
“Adam?”
Sera’s voice was almost a whisper, filled with surprise and confusion. He wanted to tell her why he was here, needed to tell her, but he couldn’t stop touching her. He moved his lips up to her neck, kissing her there, savoring her smooth skin, her soft scent. Beneath his lips he felt the flutter at the pulse point in her neck, a pulse that seemed to escalate with every breath she took.
“Adam? What
are you doing?”
“If you don’t want this,” he murmured, “say so now.”
“Of course I want it. I’ve thought about it . . . dreamed about it. . . .”
Thank God.
He caught the back of her neck in his hand and drew her lips to his. He kissed her boldly, with no hesitation, parting her lips with his, tenderly but insistently delving his tongue inside her mouth. He moved his hand up to lace his fingers through her sleek dark hair, feeling it fall in ripples against the back of his hand. This was it. This was the way he’d wanted to kiss her so many times before, as if he couldn’t wait to make love to her. She tasted so warm, so sweet—
“No,” she said breathlessly, pulling away. “You can’t do this to me.”
“What?”
“You can’t do this now and then walk away tomorrow. I can’t take that, Adam. I can’t.”
“You won’t have to.” He wrapped his hand around the small of her back, easing her up next to him again. “Yes, I’m walking away tomorrow. But you’re walking away with me.”
She blinked up at him. “What?”
“I was a fool, Sera. I couldn’t see what was right in front of me. I love you, and I don’t want to spend one more moment of my life without you.”
She looked at him with disbelief. “I don’t understand. Yesterday you said there was no future for us. You wanted me to find another man—”
“No. Don’t say that. Please don’t say that. I can’t even stand the sound of it.”
“They were your words.”
“And you’ll never hear them again. Do you love me?”
“You know I do.”
“Then tell me you’ll come with me to San Antonio.”
She stared at him as if she still didn’t believe what was happening. “You want me to come with you? Are you sure?”
“I’ve never been more sure of anything in my life.”
Tears filled her eyes. “Of course I’ll come with you. It’s all I ever wanted.”
Relief washed over him. Thank God. Thank God he hadn’t pushed her away so hard that she never wanted to come back.
“What about Chicago?” she asked him.
“Forget Chicago.”
“You’re not going?”
The truth of the situation was suddenly so clear to him that he couldn’t believe he hadn’t seen it before. He didn’t want to go to Chicago. In taking that job, he hadn’t been getting on with his life. He’d been running from it.
“No. I’m staying in San Antonio.”
“You are?”
“You were right. I don’t give a damn about an administrative job. I do give a damn about my patients, my friends, my family . . .” He kissed her gently. “. . . and you.” He curled his hand around her neck, easing closer to her. “I want to make love to you, Sera. Right now.”
She eased away from him. “I-I can’t.”
“No,” he said, gently pulling her back. “Please don’t tell me that.” He expelled a breath of frustration. “I know I’ve been unsure about a lot of things over these past few days. But not anymore. You don’t ever have to doubt me again.”
“It’s not that.”
“Then what is it?”
“I haven’t got anything with me. No birth control. No condoms. Nothing.”
“It doesn’t matter.”
“I could get pregnant.”
“God, I hope so.”
Sera blinked with surprise. “I don’t understand.”
“I want to have a baby.”
She looked at him incredulously. “But I know how you feel about that. I can’t ask you to—”
“You don’t have to ask. It’s what I want. What we both want. And just as soon as nature cooperates, it’s going to happen.”
“Are you sure, Adam? Are you sure you can deal with that?”
“Yes. But probably not very well. I’ll worry the whole time. I’ll probably lose a lot of sleep and God knows what else. I’m not out of the woods yet where all that’s concerned. All I know is that I’ve found the path to take me there.” He slid his hand along her cheek. “It’s you, Sera. And the very thought of letting you go . . .” His took a deep breath, trying to keep his voice from choking up. “I finally realized that for all the fear I’ve felt for the past three years, nothing compared to that.”
Tears brimmed in her eyes. “I thought I’d lost you. I thought—”
“No. You never have to worry about that again.”
She nestled closer, so soft and warm and inviting, and he held her tightly, secure in the fact that everything was finally going to be all right. He thought about the hundreds of times in the past two years when he’d dreamed about making love to her, and he couldn’t believe that tonight that dream was going to come true.
“What about Gabrio?” Sera said suddenly. “Is he all right by himself? What did you tell him?”
“That I might be gone all night.”
“You told him that?”
“Yes.”
“But if you stay here, he’s going to know—”
“He’s going to know exactly what’s happening. He’s made it through some terrible things in his life. I think he can handle a little evidence that two people love each other.”
Adam reached up to slide her other strap off her shoulder. “This is a beautiful nightgown,” he said, then kissed the place where the strap had been. He moved his lips up close to her ear. “Will you show me what’s underneath it?”
A few moments later, the shimmery blue fabric lay puddled on the floor. Staring at Sera in awe, he slowly reached out, dragged his fingertips from her collarbone to her chest, around the outer swell of her breast, then eased his hand down to take hers. He pulled her toward him, and she responded by circling her arms around his neck and giving him a long, thorough, sensuous kiss that answered every bit of the desperate need that had been buried inside him for so long. But with one hand incapacitated he couldn’t touch her the way he wanted to and love her the way he’d dreamed about since the day he’d met her.
“Damned sling,” he murmured against her lips. “I may have made a promise I can’t keep.”
“Where there’s a will, there’s a way,” she said. “Is there a will?”
“God, yes.”
“Then I’ll show you a way.”
They eased over to the bed, where Sera kept her promise. She found a way. She was everything he’d always dreamed she would be—soft and gentle and beautiful beyond his wildest dreams. And he discovered with astonishment that there was little room in his mind now for the fear and anxiety that had consumed his life for three long years. Instead, it was filled with thoughts of the woman who was bringing him out of the darkness and making his life whole again. The woman who was going to give him the family he’d wanted so much.
The woman he was going to love forever.
chapter twenty-seven
Lisa pulled her car up to the curb in front of the tidy brick house, and it was just as she’d imagined it would be—shutters on the windows, shrubs out front, and a pot of flowers by the door. A child’s bicycle stood on the front sidewalk. Crayon drawings of a pumpkin and a ghost decorated one of the bedroom windows, apparently left over from Halloween. Occasional gusts of November breeze relieved two maple trees of the last of their fall leaves.
Just the sight of all that made Lisa’s nerves skitter. It looked sweet and snug and homey—exactly the kind of place she never imagined she would belong. The deep, calming breath she took didn’t calm her in the least.
It was now or never. And never wasn’t an option.
She got out of the car. As she was closing the door, for the first time she glanced to the park across the street, where she saw an overgrown softball field with a mangled backstop. A game was in progress, but the World Series it wasn’t.
She recognized Alex and John, along with a couple of women who might have been their wives. Populating the rest of the field was an eclectic assortment of people who were probably aun
ts and uncles and cousins, along with several kids. Even a few senior citizens stood in the outfield wearing baseball gloves.
Then she saw Dave. Even with his healing injury, he was in the thick of it, standing behind the catcher and acting as umpire. He looked as if he belonged there, dead center in the heart of a great big extended family.
Somebody hit the ball. A little girl on third ran toward home as fast as her little legs could carry her. She hit home plate, stomping on it with both feet at once, then ran to Dave. He leaned over and gave her a hug, planting a big kiss right on her cheek.
Ashley.
The attack of nerves Lisa had when she approached the house had suddenly magnified tenfold. Then Dave happened to look in her direction. He froze, staring, then started to walk toward her.
As he strode across the field, still limping a little, her heart leapt into her throat. He stepped off the curb and crossed the street. When he circled around her car, she couldn’t read his expression, and suddenly all kinds of terrible thoughts crossed her mind.
Maybe he’s changed his mind.
Maybe he’s had second thoughts.
Maybe he’s going to tell you he doesn’t want you here after all.
Without missing a beat, he swept her into his arms, dropped his lips to hers, and kissed her, and all the maybes flew right out of her mind.
She had the sense that his entire family was watching, but she couldn’t have stopped him if she’d wanted to. Not when he was kissing her as if he were standing in the middle of a bunch of tequila-loving partyholics in a Monterrey hotel and the Cowboys had just declared victory.
When he finally pulled away, a quick glance toward the ball diamond told her that she’d been right. Every member of the DeMarco family had stopped playing and had turned to watch them, their jaws dropping right down to the dirt.
“Dave,” she said a little breathlessly, “your whole family saw that.”
He glanced over his shoulder. “Oh, yeah. They’re nosy.” He sighed. “I’m afraid you’ll have to get used to that.”
“And your brothers. They’re coming this way.”
“One more thing you’re going to have to get used to.”
“Hey, Lisa,” Alex said as they approached. “It’s about time you showed up. Dave’s been waiting. And not too patiently.”