The Darkest Days (Torn Apart Book 2)

by Pressley James

  She laughed. “You are so conceited,” she said, looking at him thoughtfully. “And your mother?”

  “She’s a beautiful spirit, inside and out,” he admitted. “Any goodness in me, she fostered it. If there was anyone that I hated disappointing, it was her, and that’s true even today.”

  “You say that you’re the youngest in a brood of seven. How many brothers and sisters do you have?”

  “Six brothers---no sisters. Each of us, we have our own particular nuisances and dispositions.” He gave a crooked grin. “Let’s just say that things were never boring around the house.”

  “I’d love to see pictures of them all,” she said shyly. “That is if you don’t mind.”

  “Later, when we get home, I’ll show you the family album,” he muttered, giving her a brief glance. “But, when you come across my nerdy pictures from yesteryear, you better not laugh.”

  She giggled. “That’s one promise that I may not be able to live up to.”

  The remainder of their journey went that way, continuing with light conversation and camaraderie. Forty-five minutes later, they were cruising off the exit ramp onto 26th West.

  “Wow,” she breathed, eyeing the tall, well-constructed structures that lined the streets. And the streets, they were busy with activity as pedestrians scurried about their way. “Atlanta really is a beautiful city.”

  “This is west side Atlanta,” he stated, slowing at the pedestrian crosswalk, and then resumed the drive as the light changed to green. “You used to spend a considerable amount of time here.”

  “Me?” she said, surprised.

  “Yes,” he murmured, sparing her a glance, and his expression was serious. “Today, I’m giving you a piece of your old life back.”

  At his words, she went silent, and suddenly the light mood that enveloped her, disappeared. A suffocating feeling swamped her, for once more, she was venturing into the unknown.

  Chapter 10

  Promptly, at 12:35, the Lamborghini cruised to a stop at the curb on 26th and Main. With curiosity, she looked out the passenger’s side window and noticed the quaint, intimately styled building sitting amidst the more modern structures.

  A strange feeling swirled through her, and somehow, she felt an instant connection. But, to what, she wasn’t sure.

  The closed sign dangled on the door, and the windows were completely boarded up. The front entrance contained chains and a huge pad lock, restraints that’d definitely deny entrance.

  Just above the door, a sign with fancy calligraphy read, Believe.

  “What is this place?” she asked, looking at him confusedly. “I feel like I should know what it is.”

  He looked at her squarely. “It’s your studio gallery.”

  “M-my studio gallery?” she repeated, and a faint feeling swept over her. “Why did you bring me here?”

  “You deserve to know the truth about yourself,” he said simply. “With all hope, you can put the pieces of your forgotten life back together.” He paused. “Look, if it’s too much for you, you don’t have to go in---”

  Her tear-filled eyes met his. “I want to go in,” she interrupted, swallowing hard. “But, I’m scared. Will you go with me?”

  “Of course, I will,” he said roughly, and all kinds of emotions played on his face. “I’ll be with you every step of the way. Wait there. I’ll come around and open your door.”

  She nodded. “Okay.”

  The Lamborghini operated on cue as he pressed the control to open its doors. After climbing out, he moved to her side to assist her. But, as she stepped out, the same fear and trepidation overcame her.

  “Sebastian, I can’t do this,” she whispered, grasping the front of his shirt, and stared up at him. “What happens if I can’t remember anything? I’m so afraid---”

  “Baby, look at me,” he murmured softly, grasping her chin, and forced her eyes to his. “You are not alone. Whatever’s in there, we’ll face it together. We’ll be scared together. Alright?” After pressing a gentle kiss against her forehead, he grabbed her hand. “Come on.”

  While he led the way, she kept a death-like grip on his hand. They reached the door, and as they did, he released her. In silence, she watched as he disengaged both the chain and the pad lock. With bated breath, she listened as the door clicked open.

  The darkness in the gallery seemed to beckon her, she realized, peeking past him. Again, a multitude of strange emotions swirled within her.

  “You ready?” he asked, cupping her chin. “Only do it if you are. Whatever decision you make, I’ll back you, okay?”

  “I’m ready,” she nodded, sniffling back fresh tears. “There’s never a right time to face difficult situations. You just have to meet them head on and pray that you survive the impact.”

  “Go in whenever you’re ready,” he encouraged, placing his hands on her shoulders as she hovered at the threshold.

  She held her breath as she entered.

  Still, she couldn’t speak.

  “The place is a little dusty,” Sebastian replied, flicking the light switch, and soon light flooded the space. “It’s been a while since it’s been in use.”

  Trailing a few steps away from him, she looked around with interest and curiosity. Under her low heels, the hardwood floor glistened with a high sheen. The studio gallery housed a second level, apparently, she mulled, noticing the stairwell that led to the upper floor. All around, the walls were covered in red brick while fashionable light fixtures hang from the ceiling in perfect synchronized rows. At various points and corners in the room, futons and stylish chairs rested, ranging in shades from black, red, and white. Staggered at different angles, the white display cases alternated between flat shapes or large rectangular boxes, and paintings covered each one.

  Stills, abstracts, portraits….

  It seemed that she had a penchant for many forms of art. She meandered to the nearest display case. And this one in particular, she mulled, tracing a finger along the bumps and ridges of paint on the portrait, it was truly one of a kind. So much longing and intimacy was evident in the abstract piece.

  “I’m surprised that I have this much talent,” she said, voicing her thoughts out loud. “The work is simply exquisite.”

  “You were well on making a name for yourself. But, of course, trouble intervened, and success was prolonged. I’m sad to admit my own part in it,” he muttered, and guilt played in his voice. “If I could have a do-over---”

  She turned around to face him. “There’s no point in rehashing the past. What’s done is done,” she said firmly, staring up at him. “We can’t change things. Moving forward is the only thing that we can do. Besides,” she sighed. “I don’t want to mar this moment by talking about our problems. We’ll only end up fighting about it, and I don’t want to do that today.”

  “And I don’t want to fight with you,” he agreed with a brisk nod. “So, I’ll just drop the subject altogether.”

  She trailed across the room, and this time, he stayed behind, giving her space and opportunity to explore alone. As she moved from one display case to another, her excitement built, and her exuberance was unmatched as she took the stairs.

  The second level, apparently, was an open living area, containing a small kitchenette and bedding area, and even it held an artistic flair. Partially, along the walls, the white bookshelves were carefully built in, showcasing books and fine, crystalline pieces. A modernly designed full-sized bed was the center-piece, and the multi-colored pillows were propped against the ivory-shaded headboard.

  As a matter of fact, ivory was the shade of the day, she noted, sweeping a gaze at the remaining furniture. It definitely exuded a brightness and cleanliness about the room.

  Several moments later, she returned to the lower level. Across the room, Sebastian sat on one of the futons while leafing through what looked like some artistry magazine. Upon seeing her, he stood.

  “Well, what you think of the place?” he asked, stopping before her. “Is it wh
at you were expecting?”

  “This place is astonishing, and while I feel some connection to it, I don’t remember anything,” she murmured against the disappointment. “I don’t think that I ever will.”

  “Dr. Roma said to give things time---”

  “But, what if I don’t want to?” she interrupted, inhaling a deep breath. “What if I’m tired of waiting? I don’t want my entire life to be at a standstill. I just want to live it.”

  “I won’t even stand here and say that I know how you feel or what you’re going through. But, the not knowing has to be hell. Listen,” he said, clasping her shoulders. “There are professionals here that can help you. I’ve already spoken to Dr. Roma, and he’s referred several well-renowned psychologists---”

  “Wait, you consulted Dr. Roma without even discussing it with me first?” she gasped, stepping back. “What gives you the right to control my life like that?”

  “I thought that we weren’t going to fight---”

  “How can we not, especially when you’re always trying to control things?” she snapped, narrowing her gaze. “For once, can’t I make the decisions of what happens with my life? Stay out of it! It’s no longer your concern.”

  “Vanessa, I’m not trying to control your life, I was trying to be helpful,” he said with a hint of anger, and the released a frustrated breath. “Fuck, I can’t do anything right with you, can I?”

  “What’s that supposed to mean?” she huffed.

  “That chip on your shoulder is so wide, you’re lucky that you haven’t fallen over----”

  “Chip on my shoulder?” she scoffed, folding her arms, and eyed him haughtily. “That’s rich.”

  “No, what’s rich is the fact that you’re scrutinizing everything that I say or do,” he snapped in turn, raking a hand through his hair. “There’s no winning with you, is there? I try to get close to you, and you don’t like that. I give you space, you’re not satisfied with that either. Look, I called Dr. Roma because I genuinely want to help you. I want you to remember your past and reclaim your life. I’m not trying to play mind games with you or put you up under some kind of mind control.” His eyes blazed with fire. “But, if that’s what you want to believe, I can’t stop you.”

  “I think that my misgivings are well justified. You are the one who caused this rift between us,” she fired back, jabbing a finger into his chest. “Your words and actions have made me doubt you.”

  “I thought you didn’t want to talk about that,” he quipped tightly. “Earlier, you said that there was no point in rehashing the past.”

  “Well, maybe I was wrong!” she shouted, feeling the hurt bubble inside her again, and the fresh tears pooled in her eyes. “Maybe I need a vivid reminder of what you’ve done, and then hopefully, I can stop loving and needing you so much!”

  “So, that’s it, huh?” he muttered, and the hurt played across his face. “You just want to wipe away any trace of me in your life?”

  Sobbing, she sucked in a hard breath. “I don’t know what I want---”

  “No, you don’t do you?” he accused, looking at her woundingly. “You’re hot one minute, but then cold the next. For three weeks, I kept my distance, gave you the space that you wanted and needed. But, that wasn’t good enough, was it?” Stepping back, he gave her a dangerous smile. “You couldn’t stand the fact that I wasn’t close to you, that I hadn’t come you---”

  “Stop it!” she blazed, breathing fast. “I want you to stop twisting things to your advantage----”

  But, still, he wasn’t deterred.

  “My advantage?” Sebastian scoffed, giving an abrupt laugh. “I think not, sweetheart. I think it’s to your advantage that you’re playing games with yourself.” He sized her up with a hot look. “You are the one who came to me, seeking me out.”

  “What do you mean?” she asked, seizing a short breath. “How did I seek you out?”

  “Oh, sweetheart, it’s too late to play coy now. This morning, weren’t you totally channeling shades of Jezebel? Daybreak had barely passed before you hauled your ass down to the stables to find me, dressed sexily in your little tank top and daisy dukes. You knew the sight of you would blow my libido sky high. It was my attention that you wanted, and you had it dab smack.” His stare was long and deep. “I was so fucking hard that I could barely tolerate it, and it took everything in me not to jack off with you standing there. And you know what? I still played along with you because I knew your agenda. You wanted me to want you. I did, and I do. But, still, you can’t face the truth about yourself or what you want, can you?” he taunted, taking a step closer. “Much like you played the game then, you’re playing it now.”

  “I’m not the one playing games, you are!” she fought back, breathing fast. “How dare you insinuate that I---”

  “I’m not insinuating anything, I’m just stating the facts,” he said sharply. “And this fucking indecisive act that you’ve got going, Vanessa, it isn’t working for either you or me. I swear with you, it’s like flipping a damn switch. One minute, you’re saying, ‘stay away from me’, and then, it’s, ‘oh, Sebastian, why are you treating me this way’---”

  Before she could control, the distraught sound left her. “How can you be so cruel?” she whispered.

  “Cruel? Is that what I’m being?” he challenged, stealing her wounded gaze, and in his eyes, she saw hints of his own inner despair. “Well, killing you with kindness sure in the hell isn’t working.”

  “Damn you!” she shouted, barreling into him at once. Distraught, breathing hard, she shoved him against the chest, and the tears blinded her as she pushed him again. “You ruined everything! Why did you have to lie to me?”

  Her words broke his bough, penetrated his hard armor. “Tell me what you want me to do,” he muttered, nearly choking on his words. Though, he tried, he couldn’t hide his devastation. “Baby, I’m sorry---”

  “What if your sorry isn’t good enough?” she raged, releasing a pent-up cry, and shoved him again. “I wish that I could hate you, and then maybe I could bear the pain. But, I can’t hate you.” Her wounded gaze clung to his. “You have this hold on me, and I can’t break it even if I desperately want to.”

  Finally, replete, sobbing, she fell into him and didn’t fight against his hold; and there seemed no end to her flood of tears.

  “Forgive me,” he mumbled against her head. “I’ve never been good at reigning in my temper. I shouldn’t have said the things that I did. Here lately, I can’t seem to say or do anything right.”

  “I hate the way things are,” she mumbled against his chest, wetting his neatly pressed shirt with fresh tears. “This tension between us is nearly unbearable.”

  “But, can’t we find a way to fix that?” Pulling back slightly, he stared down at her, and again, she sensed his struggle. “I say to hell with pride and doing the right thing, Vanessa. Nothing will ever change the fact that I want to be with you,” he rasped unsteadily. “I know that I’ve lost the right to, but, I’m asking for a second chance. I want to make things right. Tell me what you want. Tell me the words that I need to say.”

  “I don’t know---” she sniffled, staring at the wall of his chest. “I’m so confused.”

  “Are you confused about having feelings for me?” he asked, not able to disguise the hurt in his voice. “Did my betrayal cause them to change?”

  “No,” she whispered, lifting her eyes to his. “I still have feelings for you.”

  “Then, as long as that’s true, we have a chance. Vanessa---I love you, and I’ll do anything to fix this,” he whispered back, framing her face in his large hands, and torture played in his eyes. His head lowered, but then, he stopped when their lips were a breath-width apart. “I miss you so fucking much that I can’t breathe.”

  “I miss you, too,” she breathed hoarsely, trembling against him. “Please---”

  Her words were the invitation he sought.

  As he claimed her lips, her desperate moan escaped. But, the kiss wa
s feather-light, and oh so blatantly damaging to her resolve.

  Though desperation seethed at the edges, they slowly explored the feel of one another, relishing the intimate moment. Their lips meshed together, then broke apart before melding again, tasting the delicacies that their mouths offered.

  Their desire broke past the fringes, demanding more. His lips probed hers more fervently, deepening the kiss. The onslaught of pleasure was too great, she realized, dazed, sagging against him weakly. For she held no defenses against it---

  Teasing her lips apart, he thrust his tongue inside.

  With a deep moan, she welcomed the delightfully maddening intrusion. His hand moved up her nape, finally finding the pins that held her hair intact. Whispering daring promises against her lips, he removed them, freeing her soft tresses. Drawing her closer, he threaded his fingers in the thick mass, intensifying their tonguing kiss.

  Now, the kiss was deep and long, tongue-thrusting with tinges of sensual madness, and their desperate, mingled breaths signified that they were on the brinks of their own pleasurable destruction.

  The intense feelings ricocheted through her body, demanding more, and as she had countless times before, she began to drown.

  She fought to hold onto sanity. To find some reasoning amidst the haze---

  “Sebastian, wait,” she whispered, breaking from the kiss, and then, touched her passion-bruised lips with a shaky hand. Her drugged gaze met his, and the sight of his blatant desire nearly destroyed her. It was as destructive as her own, she realized. “We have to stop.” Pulling free, she turned her back to him before taking in an unsteady breath and fought to find her composure. “Things are moving too fast. I need time.”

  “Time is what I promised you, and that’s what I’ll give you,” he rasped, struggling against his rising need. He released a deep sigh behind her. “You’re right. I said that we wouldn’t rush things. If I’m coming on too strong. I’m sorry---”

  “No. Don’t say that you’re sorry---we should share equal blame. We were both just caught up in the moment, and we just reacted,” she murmured softly, facing him again. Hesitating, she looked around the place. “Maybe I was wrong before. Perhaps, we should rethink our living arrangements---I could stay here.