Arms of Mercy

by Ruth Reid

  “You’re just in time, Elijah.” The older woman set the hot pan on a pot holder and turned. “Ach, I didn’t know you brought a guest. Hello, I’m Lynn Zook. You must be Elijah’s Catherine.”

  “It’s nice to meet you.” Catherine’s face heated, repeating Lynn’s words. “Elijah’s Catherine.” She liked the sound of that.

  “I’m Rebecca,” the twentysomething woman said. “We’ve heard a lot about you.” She motioned to the table. “Have a seat, please. Would you like a cup of kaffi?”

  “Sure.”

  An older man lumbered into the kitchen, who Elijah introduced as the district’s bishop, and a few minutes later, Catherine met the entire family when a younger boy ambled into the kitchen asking if the cookies were done.

  After Catherine answered their various questions about her injures and how she had come to live with Doc on his ranch, Lynn asked, “Are you planning to geh back to Michigan soon?”

  Catherine glanced at Elijah briefly, then shrugged. “I’m nett sure.”

  “Catherine’s memory is just coming back,” Elijah explained.

  The conversation shifted naturally to the men talking about farming and horses, and Catherine talking to Lynn and Rebecca about gardening and canning. Catherine enjoyed the time they had spent together, especially when Lynn gave Catherine a tour of her home and showed her the different quilt projects in process.

  Catherine touched the cottony fabric and studied the hand stitches. “Keep your stitches even. You don’t want lines that zigzag.”

  “Are you okay, Catherine?” Lynn asked.

  “Oh, I’m sorry. I was just remembering something mei mamm said to me about sewing. I, ah . . . I’ve been having these flashbacks and”—she wiped tears with the back of her hand—“they take me by surprise most of the time.”

  “Let’s get you a tissue.” Lynn led her back into the kitchen and handed her the box of tissues from off the counter.

  Elijah stood. “Is everything all right?”

  Catherine nodded, even though her heart was breaking and things were not all right. Had her mother really passed away? Was her memory correct?

  “I think we should probably head back to the ranch,” Elijah said. “I don’t want Doc worrying about you, and I still want to work some more with Pickles.”

  “I hope you kumm back soon,” Lynn said, following them to the door. “Maybe you could kumm for supper one nacht.”

  Catherine smiled. “That would be wunderbaar. Danki.” She walked to the parked buggy alongside Elijah. “They’re nice people. I really like Lynn.”

  He opened the buggy’s passenger door. “They’ve been like family to me.” As he climbed in the driver’s side, he asked, “Why were you crying?”

  “I had a flashback. Something mei mamm said about sewing, and then I remembered she passed away, and I missed her.”

  Elijah reached for her hand and gave it a gentle squeeze. “I wish all your memories would be gut ones and nett sad.”

  “You’re a gut man, Elijah Graber. I see why I fell in love with you.”

  “Please don’t ever forgot those words.” He winked, then fell silent.

  Catherine turned her gaze out the window. Thank You, Lord, for guiding our paths. Only You could have brought us back together again.

  Elijah parked the buggy next to the barn. “I’m going to work some more with Pickles.”

  “I should see if Cynthia needs me to do something.” Catherine headed for the house but doubled back to the barn. She found Elijah in the horse stall with Pickles. “Would you like to stay for supper?”

  “Sure. What time?”

  “We usually eat around six.”

  According to the clock hanging on the barn wall, that gave him a couple hours to work with Pickles. “Sounds gut.”

  Catherine took a few steps away, then stopped.

  “Is something wrong?”

  “We were in a barn when I proposed. I remember putting a blanket on mei horse, Cocoa. It was kalt out. January?”

  Elijah’s Adam’s apple moved down his throat, and his brows pinched together.

  “I did propose, right? Mei mind isn’t scrambled, is it?”

  He nodded. “You did.”

  Her throat tightened, and tears began to well.

  “Catherine.” Elijah slipped out of the stall. “I should have told you—”

  “Oh, Elijah.” She fell against his chest and molded into his arms, nuzzling her face in the crook of his neck. “You’ve been so patient with me. I know why you didn’t tell me. You wanted me to remember it on mei own. You didn’t want to overwhelm me all at once. You’re a gut man, Elijah. God’s given me a gut man.”

  He kissed her forehead. “Are you ready to go home, Catherine?”

  Chapter 37

  You’re a gut man, Elijah.” Catherine’s words haunted him throughout the night. He wasn’t a gut man—he allowed Catherine to believe she had proposed to him. It had been so easy to withhold the truth at the time. Now the truth had his stomach twisted in knots. Sooner or later she was bound to remember it was Zach she wanted to marry. How would she feel about him then? Definitely nett as the patient man who didn’t want to overwhelm her. No, he’d intentionally withheld the information, hoping somehow those memories were gone for good.

  Elijah flipped to his other side on the mattress. He wasn’t looking forward to the trip back to Michigan, but he had promised himself that he would see that she made it safely home. Once they were back in Posen, Catherine would take one look at Zach, and all those memories she had hidden would suddenly surface. Things would never be the same again.

  Lord, give me strength. She’s alive and that’s all that matters. If she chooses to resume her life with Zach, help me to accept that decision. I am so grateful that You kept her safe and that I was able to spend this time with her. Lord, You know how much I love Catherine . . . Just please give me strength to let her go.

  Dr. Wellington insisted on driving them to Michigan when Catherine started to have a panic attack about getting on another bus. She wanted to go home and see her family, while at the same time, she didn’t want to leave those she’d grown to love in Ohio. Especially Kimberly. The child had just been cleared to return to the ranch, and if she learned Catherine had left, Kimberly might act out. Before leaving, she made Cynthia, Matthew, and Quinn promise not to tell her immediately, and to watch her closely when they did.

  Everything felt right in an odd sort of way. She just wished she didn’t feel like Elijah was holding something back from her. She trusted him. But he’d been quiet the last few hours—ever since they started seeing signs for nearby towns.

  As they neared Posen, Catherine grew restless. “I remember this area. That’s Lake Huron.”

  “The third largest of the Great Lakes, and it has the longest shoreline,” Doc said.

  “I’ve lived in Michigan mei whole life and never knew those facts.” She chuckled. “Or maybe I did and I just don’t remember.” She glanced in the back seat at Elijah. “Did I know that?”

  He shrugged. “I didn’t.”

  She turned her gaze back to the deep blue water. “We’re nett far nau.” She wrung her hands. Would she remember everyone? Her brother and sister-in-law, and her nieces and nephew? She still couldn’t visualize their faces or what the house looked like. But she also wouldn’t have been able to describe Lake Huron before they came upon it.

  Elijah leaned forward. “You’ll want to turn at the next left.”

  Catherine knew the turn. In another mile they would turn again onto Leer Road. She rubbed her hands on the dress given to her by Lynn. It wasn’t until she placed the prayer kapp on this morning that she figured out why she had felt comfortable wearing a scarf—she was used to having her head covered. Made sense. Everything was beginning to make sense again.

  Elijah guided Doc in the right direction. She’d been too busy discovering all the changes. Her aenti Irma and Faith had put in a larger garden this year in preparation for Faith’
s upcoming wedding, no doubt. It looked like the Kings had a new horse in their pasture.

  “It’s the second driveway on the right,” Elijah said.

  Catherine stared at the big farmhouse. She searched out her bedroom window on the second floor. Same curtains. The lawn was freshly mowed. She gulped when all the parked buggies came into view.

  “Looks like word got out,” Elijah said.

  “How did—?” She twisted in her seat to look at him. “Did you notify everyone?”

  “Nay, just George.”

  The moment Doc parked the truck and turned off the motor, her heart raced even faster. Was she ready for this? Would she recognize everyone? Catherine drew a deep breath. I can do this if Elijah is close by. She glanced at Doc, who hadn’t unlatched his seat belt. “You’re coming inside, jah?”

  “I booked a motel room in Rogers City,” Doc said. “I’ll stop by in the morning and say goodbye.”

  “Nay, please don’t go. Nett yet,” Catherine pleaded. “I’m sure mei family will want to meet you.”

  “They will,” Elijah added.

  Doc hesitated a moment, then unhooked his seat belt. “Okay. I’ll stay long enough to meet everyone, but I don’t want to impose. They want to spend time with you.”

  Elijah got out of the vehicle and stretched. He sidled up beside her. “Ready?”

  She sensed his smile was covering something, but she didn’t ask. Perhaps he was tired. It had been a long trip. She looked around the farm and took in a deep breath. “It’s gut to be back, isn’t it?”

  “You remembering everything? The haus and barns?”

  “Jah, everything.”

  The door swung open before they reached the top porch step. Gwen was first to come out, followed by George. Both greeted her in a warm hug. George and Elijah shook hands, then Elijah introduced them to Doc, as Catherine had become tangled in hugs from her nieces and nephew.

  “I missed you, Catherine,” Julie said.

  Catherine bent down and gathered Julie into her arms. “I missed you too, sweetie.” Tears streamed down her face, but not just tears of joy. At the same time she held her niece, she was shrouded with a dull ache. She missed Kimberly. Catherine set her down. “I think you’ve grown a foot.”

  Julie giggled, then wrapped her arms even tighter around Catherine’s neck.

  Inside the house a throng of people welcomed her home at once. Catherine was hesitant. She didn’t recognize everyone at first. She had no clue who some of them were until they spoke, then she recognized their voices. Others, like her cousin Faith, she remembered immediately.

  “I’m so glad to see you.” Faith hugged her tight. “I’ve missed you so much.”

  Catherine pulled back after a minute of soaking in the joyful reunion. “Have you and Gideon set the date of your wedding yet?”

  “We were married in April,” Gideon piped up. “Faith was very sad after we heard about your accident, so I talked the bishop into marrying us sooner.”

  Faith frowned. “Nau I wish we had waited so you could have been a part.”

  “Nonsense.” Catherine pulled her back into a hug and whispered in her ear. “I proposed too, you know.”

  Her cousin pushed her to arm’s length. “You did? When?”

  “In January.” She chuckled. Someone else tugged on her arm. She turned only to get pulled into a suffocating hug by a short, gray-haired woman Catherine didn’t recognize.

  “It’s so gut to see you. We were all so worried.” The woman held her a long time, then pushed her out to arm’s length. “Catherine, you’ve gotten so thin. If you’re nett careful, a gust of wind will pick you up and carry you away.”

  “You think?” Catherine looked down at the baggy dress Lynn had given her to wear home. She hadn’t had time to take in the seams.

  Another woman came up beside her and wrapped her in a hug, then another unfamiliar face welcomed her home, then another. The walls in the room seemed as though they were closing in. So many people. Faces she didn’t recognize. Names she didn’t know. Too much commotion. Too much unwanted attention. Where’s Elijah?

  Catherine glanced around the room and found him embraced in a tearful reunion with his parents, and Doc was engaged in a conversation with George. In need of a breath of fresh air, she made her way to the back door. She hadn’t been outside long before Elijah joined her.

  He came up beside her. “Is everything okay?”

  She nodded.

  “You sure?”

  She shook her head. “I don’t know very many people, and I was beginning to feel smothered. Everyone thinks I’m too thin nau.” She pinched the bridge of her nose. “I didn’t expect coming home to be so hard. I miss Kimberly.”

  Elijah tipped up her chin with his thumb. “No one expects you to remember everyone. And as for your weight, you’re perfect just the way you are.”

  She smiled. “I’m so glad I have you.”

  “Always.”

  She gazed at the area surroundings, taking in the green pastures and different outbuildings. Part of her missed Ohio.

  “We should probably go back inside,” Elijah said.

  “Is it wrong that I don’t want to? That I would rather spend mei time with just you?”

  “It’s nett wrong through mei eyes. I wish we could avoid the crowd too.” He chuckled.

  They strolled back to the house, and as they stepped inside, her longtime friend Mary was there to greet her with a hug.

  “It’s so wunderbaar to see you! We need to set a time when we can get together and catch up. I want to hear what happened.”

  Catherine wasn’t sure she wanted to talk about the accident, but she didn’t let those emotions show in her reply. “Jah, tell me when.”

  “Hello, Catherine. It’s gut to see you.”

  She turned and recognized Zach’s smile. “Hiya, Zach.”

  “You look . . . gut.” His gaze seemed to focus on the scar around her eye. “Are you still in pain?”

  She’d been so busy greeting family and friends, she’d forgotten about her scars, but now, standing before Zach, every one of her insecurities returned. Catherine pulled her kapp lower to cover more of her face. “How’s your clock business?”

  “You remembered. That’s great. George said you lost your memory and might have difficulty remembering things. I picked up more furniture stores. I’m up to ten.”

  Numbness entered the top of her head and worked its way down her spine. Her memory had returned—even things she’d remembered wrong. Catherine hadn’t proposed to Elijah—it was Zach.

  Another well-wisher came up on her blind side and pulled her into a hug, then someone else greeted her, until her body was as limp as a rag doll.

  “This has probably been a bit overwhelming,” Zach said. “Maybe you should sit down.”

  The only overwhelming part was not knowing why Elijah had led her to believe the two of them were in love. Her thoughts whirled. Once again the crowded room closed in and she found herself needing air. She pressed through the visitors and slipped out the back door. Catherine ran to the barn and found solace in the stall brushing her mare.

  The barn door opened. “Cat?” Elijah came up to the stall. “Are you all right?”

  “Nay, I’m nett.” She whirled around and pointed the currycomb at him. “Why didn’t you tell me that I was in love with Zach? I didn’t propose to you—it was Zach.”

  His complexion drained of color as first he stiffened, then his shocked expression morphed into one of guilt. He bowed his head, not willing to look her in the eye. “I didn’t want to confuse you.”

  “Ha.”

  “It’s true. You did propose to him, but you also left town. Maybe your memory is still foggy in that area because—”

  She straightened her shoulders. “Because I’m confused?”

  He glanced up, but the moment he did, he looked back down. “Catherine, I brought you home so that if you want to be with Zach, you can be with him. He’s a gut man. But only y
ou will know if you’re in love with him.” He turned and walked away.

  Sobbing uncontrollably, Catherine brushed the mare’s coat, then dropped the brush and hugged the horse’s neck. She had no idea how long she’d been in the barn when the door creaked open.

  Faith found her sitting on the floor, her back against the stall door. Her cousin sat beside her and reached for her hand. “You’ve been through a lot, and I want you to know that I’m here for you.”

  Catherine leaned her head against Faith’s shoulder. “I still have some memory problems. When I told you I proposed, I thought I proposed to Elijah. It wasn’t until I saw Zach again that I knew it was him.”

  “Zach will understand about your memory problems.”

  “Will he understand that I haven’t sorted out that part of mei memory? I don’t know if I love Zach. Why did I propose?”

  “You and Zach have courted several years. I know you were frustrated at times because it didn’t seem like Zach would ever pop the question, but then there were times you seemed content.”

  “Content, or was I settling for the status quo?”

  “Only you can answer that.”

  “That’s pretty much what Elijah told me too.” Catherine sighed. She was back home and more confused than ever.

  Faith pushed off the floor and reached for her hand. “Kumm on, you have a haus full of people who have all missed you.”

  Doc! Catherine scrambled to her feet. “Did you meet Dr. Wellington yet?”

  “Your Englisch driver?”

  “He’s more than just a driver, but I’ll tell you about him and his ranch later. I left him with George.” Catherine rushed out of the barn, but his truck was gone. Once she went back inside, she searched for Elijah, but he was gone too.

  Chapter 38

  After a long night of praying for wisdom and direction, Catherine awoke with a clear head. It had only taken a moment to register how late it was by the amount of sunlight in the room. She tossed back the covers and shot out of bed.

  Once downstairs, Catherine greeted her sister-in-law. “Guder mariye, Gwen. What time is it?”

  “Almost one o’clock. The children wanted to wake you, but I didn’t know how much rest you needed after your long trip . . . and since your accident.” Gwen poured a mug of coffee and handed it to Catherine. “Would you like me to make you something to eat?”