I sat down against an oak, listening to the murmur of the water. I came here frequently. It was my thinking spot. The solitude of the woods, coupled with the trickling stream calmed me. I had conversations with my mother here. Well, I had conversations with my mother everywhere, but here, in my thinking spot, I always felt like she could maybe hear me more clearly.
“Mom, can you believe this? What does this mean? How is he here? Why is he here? How did he not know about Alex?”
My conversations with my mother were usually half spoken, half thought ramblings. I didn’t think I had to actually speak out loud for her to hear me, but I liked to nonetheless. I didn’t need to clarify whom I was speaking about. I had told her all about Julien, and our subsequent falling out.
I don’t know how long I was sitting there before Julien showed up. I knew he would eventually. He wasn’t quiet, purposefully making as much noise as possible as he made his way through the brush. He paused when he saw me, waiting for me to acknowledge him.
“Am I intruding, Chérie?”
I gave him an encouraging smile. “No, not at all. I think now would be a perfect time to sort out some unanswered questions.”
He nodded and joined me, leaning against the other side of my oak tree.
“I must admit, I’m rather impressed with your tracking abilities. I guess I’ll have to add that to your ever-growing list of talents. Nan would approve.”
He gave a half-hearted laugh. “Any idiot can follow a stream through a few trees. Your grandfather told me where to look.”
“Well, being predictable is one of my many talents.”
He looked over his shoulder at me. “You come here often.”
I couldn’t tell if it was a question or a statement. I just nodded. “Yeah. When I need to think.”
He picked a few burrs from the bottoms of his pants, then met my eyes with a steady gaze. “Well, let’s sort this out then. I have a few questions of my own.”
“Yuri stop!” squealed a petite, bikini clad blond girl as a young man I assumed to be named Yuri purposely sprayed her with champagne from our morning mimosas. I leaned a bit to my left to avoid the sticky mist, but otherwise tried my best to remain unnoticed. I was so caught up in watching the antics of Bikini Blond and Yuri, that I was startled by the two boys racing past my chaise from the other side.
Marla’s yacht was essentially a floating Calvin Klein ad. I was surrounded by probable underwear models with perfect bodies and devil-may-care attitudes. It was enough to make a girl a bit insecure. Luckily, I wasn’t just any girl. I was Julien’s girl. And no matter how many bikini clad vixens happened to be frolicking nearby, he only ever had eyes for me.
“Here you go, love,” Julien handed me a glass of sparkling water and motioned for me to scoot forward on my chaise so he could apply my sunscreen. He ran his lotioned hands over my skin and under the straps of my bathing suit, careful not to miss any spots. I felt unwelcome eyes on me and the hair stood up at the back of my neck as Julien dropped a kiss on my shoulder to signal his completion of the task. Glancing around as subtly as possible, I caught sight of Marla’s stony façade. She was wearing oversized sunglasses that gave her a decidedly bug-like appearance. I couldn’t see her eyes, but I got the distinct impression that she was staring me down.
She called out to Julien and said something in French. He sighed quietly behind me and kissed my cheek as he stood. “I’ll be right back, Chérie.”
As Julien approached Marla’s chaise, she untied her bikini top and dropped it to the deck.
Wow.
Julien continued toward her as if her nudity didn’t even register on his radar. I don’t know why I was so shocked. She certainly wasn’t the only topless woman onboard. I tried not to watch as they exchanged a few short sentences. She handed him a bottle of oil and presented him with her back. When he finished with her back, she flipped over, clearly expecting him to continue with her front. I was openly staring at them at this point, unable to hide my curiosity. He offered her the bottle of oil, but she waved it away impatiently. Sighing in resignation, he poured a dollop of oil into his hands and began rubbing them across Marla’s front.
I just sat there stupidly, unable to pull my eyes from the two of them. His hands traveled over her flat stomach and perky breasts, her nipples hardening at the attention. He didn’t seem to notice the effect his touch was having on her. He just finished applying the oil to her neck and placed the bottle on Marla’s side table. The whole thing had seemed very clinical.
Marla grabbed his wrist as he was turning to go. He leaned over to catch what she was saying, and she kissed him full on the mouth. I couldn’t be sure from my vantage point, but it appeared as if he kissed her back. I became very interested in studying the condensation on my glass of water as Julien returned to my side.
“Je suis désolé, Chérie, Marla needed some oil.”
I looked at him wide-eyed, unsure how I was supposed to react to his kissing another woman in front of me. After all, I had only known this man eight days. I had no hold over him. He didn’t owe me an explanation.
“Marla is a friend of your mother?” was all I could think to say. I was irritated at how meek my voice sounded.
“Oui.” His eyes were wary, searching my face for signs of upset.
“And are they very close? Your mother and she?”
“Sí...” Uh oh. He had switched to Italian.
“But I’m guessing you don’t call her Auntie Marla.”
He laughed nervously at my quip. “No. Marla and I do not share a familial bond, that is true.”
I narrowed my eyes at him. I didn’t like the way he was skirting the issue. “And what kind of bond would you say you two do have?”
He gave me a lopsided smile before answering with an apologetic shrug, “Siamo amanti. We are lovers.”
I wasn’t sure I had heard him correctly. He seemed so composed and matter-of-fact as if he had said ‘I deliver her groceries’ or ‘she collects my mail when I’m on vacation’. Surely I wasn’t the only person that would take pause at their unconventional relationship. She was twice his age! She was his mother’s friend! She had been watching the two of us canoodling on her yacht for over a week now!
I opened and closed my mouth several times before managing to finally make sound come out. “You are lovers? But doesn’t she mind? You and me...? Doesn’t it bother her...?” I didn’t even know what I was trying to ask. Julien took pity on me and flashed me his hundred-watt smile. “Marla’s not the jealous type. She’d never begrudge a man some fun.”
“Some fun?” I frowned with indignation.
He was quick to soothe my ire. “Is that not what this is, Chérie? Two strangers stumbling upon each other while on holiday. Sharing passion, the beauty of the Mediterranean, and the finest accommodations? Forgive my words, they have clearly upset you. How would you prefer me to label our time together?”
Suddenly I felt very foolish. He was right. We were strangers. I meant nothing to him. Why should I? I was just a cheap girl he met in a nightclub for all he knew. No wonder Marla looked at me with such condescension. I was no threat to her. I was but a temporary amusement for her pet.
I took a steadying breath, not wanting to appear petty or heartsick. My bruised pride wouldn’t be able to handle the humiliation of being found out to be the starry-eyed virgin that had fallen for the rich woman’s gigolo. I tried my best to smile reassuringly. “No, you’re right. Of course. ‘Fun’ is an accurate label...”
He took my chin in his fingers and held my face to meet his gaze. I was momentarily distracted by the coconut scent of Marla’s oil on his hand as he said, “Come Chérie, let us go to your cabin. You must allow me to make amends for upsetting you so.” My heart skittered at his suggestion, and I knew even before I let him help me up that he was forgiven.
“Why didn’t you call me when you realized you were enceintes?”
I raised my brows at his question. “I did. I left several messages.
The only response I ever got was a text.”
Julien frowned in thought. “I never received any messages. You’re sure you had the correct number?”
“Absolutely. It was the number you called me fro-” My memory flashed. A text from Julien telling me he had changed his phone carrier. I quickly dismissed the thought as another occurred to me. “It was your voice on the outgoing message of your voicemail. “
He shook his head. “No one had access to my phone to erase any messages...”
I scowled with contempt, angry with myself for having been so stupid. “Julien, did you change phone carriers after I left?”
He shook his head again. Suddenly it all made sense.
His eyes shot to mine and I could see understanding wash over his face as his eyes hardened. We spoke at the same time.
“Marla.”
Mr. Martin was at the table with Pops when we got back to the house. He graced us with a rather annoyed expression. “Was I not very clear about the conditions of our agreement? You are to stay within the designated area.”
Julien’s eyebrows shot up in surprise. “I have. I never left the property.”
Martin paused a moment before answering, as if trying to gather patience for a slow pupil. “Our associates ask that you remain in the immediate area. You should confine yourself to the house and yard. I don’t relish a hike through the woods to collect you. Do you think you can handle that? It shouldn’t be more than two more days or so.”
I had forgotten that Julien’s time here was limited. I didn’t like Martin putting an expiration date on it. Two days. What would happen at the end of those two days? Would Julien want to stay involved with Alex? I couldn’t silence the small voice in the back of my mind that dared to ask... would he want to stay involved with me?
“Of course. My apologies for the misunderstanding.” Julien seemed rather accommodating and I couldn’t help but wonder if perhaps Martin was more dangerous than I originally assumed. He left after a few terse exchanges in their special pidgin language. Julien shrugged off my questioning expression and turned to Pops. “Where has Alex gotten off to?”
Pops hadn’t failed to notice the tension between Martin and Julien either. “Nan has taken him to run a few errands. I didn’t know how long you two would be gone.”
Nan had cleaned the kitchen in our absence. I felt a little guilty about that, remembering the spectacular mess we had left behind. We stood in the kitchen awkwardly shifting our weight from one foot to the other. I didn’t know what to do with my hands, so I crossed my arms, then I felt self conscious about looking too ‘closed off’, so I uncrossed them and tucked my thumbs in to the front pockets of my jeans. Julien rested his hip against the counter, equally unsure of what to say. Would this awkward tension between us ever end?
Pops shook his head in regrettable resignation. “I have to run over to the Johnson’s and help Bill clear some brush from the firebreak. If the wind shifts, that fire will be heading our way.” He looked from me to Julien and back again. “Can I trust the two of you to stay out of trouble while I’m gone?”
I thought I felt myself blushing at his obvious meaning, which only made me all the more mortified, causing me to blush even deeper. My affinity for blushing in this never-ending cycle would surely end with me bursting a blood vessel in my face at some point. Was that even possible? Probably.
Pops pursed his lips at my scarlet hue. “Your grandmother should be back any minute.”
I nodded my understanding and walked him to the door, watching as his truck rumbled down the drive and out of sight. We were alone, if only for a minute. I tried not to acknowledge the increase in my heart rate.
Julien cleared his throat in an attempt at sounding casual. “What does Alex like to do for fun?”
Fun. There was that word again. Suddenly I was annoyed.
“He’s two. Everything he does, he does for fun,” I said.
Julien was taken aback by my sharp tone and sudden change of mood. “I only meant... What do you like to do together?” He looked so confused and wary. I couldn’t help softening towards him. My hormones were on a roller coaster and I felt a pang of guilt at forcing Julien along for the ride. I took a deep breath. “I’m sorry,” I said as I crossed back into the kitchen. “I guess I’m a little sensitive. He likes the usual stuff; cars, trains... Anything that moves, really.”
The phone gave a shrill ring, startling me.
“Hello?”
“Hi sweetheart.” It was Nan. “I just wanted to give you guys a head’s up. I ran in to Margie at the market and we’re going to stop for a bite of lunch. There’s sandwich fixings in the fridge when Pops gets hungry.”
“Oh. He’s over at the Johnson’s clearing the firebreak.”
I could hear the giddy smile in Nan’s voice. “Oh is he? Well, I guess you’re on your own for a while then. I wont be back until Alex’s naptime. Maybe later – you know how excited he gets playing at Margie’s.”
Nan was incorrigible.
“You are subtle as ever, Nan.”
I set the phone back in its cradle. “That was Nan. She’s going to be longer than expected.”
Julien nodded slowly. He looked contemplative, as if he were weighing something in his mind. I could feel the atmosphere changing in the room. “Uh... Are you hungry?” He shook his head, slowly closing the distance between us. He moved with a feline grace.
“We have unfinished business, wouldn’t you agree?”
“Our issue with Marla?” I felt my hackles rise as I said her name. His eyes hardened and his mouth tightened. “No. Not that. She has no business here with us, right now. I will deal with her later.” He stopped right in front of me. He was standing way too close for me to pretend I didn’t know what he was intending. “I am referring to our conversation of last night. Before we were interrupted.” He gently tucked a stray curl that had fallen from my ponytail behind my ear with his index finger. I shivered at the light touch.
I backed up, but only made it one step before coming up against the counter. He followed me, keeping so close I had no choice but to breathe in the air he was breathing out. Every cell in my body was chanting yes yes yes! But somehow, as if operating of it’s own accord, my hand came up and settled firmly on his chest. “Julien. We shouldn’t... We have a lot of things to work out.”
“Oui, we do. This is not one of them,” he said huskily as he took my hand from his chest and kissed the inside of my wrist. His tongue licked a searing streak across my pulse point, inexplicably causing my knees to begin to quiver.
He set my hand atop his shoulder as if I were half embracing him, and then he cradled my jaw in his warm hand. “I am going to kiss you now, Lara.”
My lips parted in a tiny gasp as butterflies invaded my stomach. If he kissed me I was lost. What would become of me when he left in two days? I didn’t think I could bear the heartbreak of losing him again. Last time I had anger to quell the hurt. This time I would have nothing; nothing but the knowledge that I wasn’t enough for him.
“Julien...” I could only manage a whisper.
Leaning down, he slowly brushed his lips back and forth across mine. The feather light touch robbed me of breath, and sent fireworks off in every one of my nerve endings. He pressed closer, deepening the kiss. His hand slid around to the back of my head and he threaded his fingers into my hair, loosening my ponytail. His other hand wrapped around my waist to the small of my back.
Suddenly, I was alive again. Without realizing it, I had been a zombie, going about my daily life half numb. Only now was I truly awake for the first time in nearly three and a half years. I had forgotten how amazing this could be. I remembered it being good, but even my most generous memory paled in comparison to the reality.
Julien ran his tongue across my bottom lip, urging me to open for him. “S'il te plaît, ma chérie, laisse moi dedans.” I had no idea what he said, but I knew exactly what he meant. I couldn’t deny him access to my mouth any more than I could deny him
access to my heart, and I parted my lips, knowing full well that this very moment would be the moment I would lament later. The moment I let my hard earned armor drop, and I allowed myself to indulge in the fantasy that Julien wanted me again. Not just as a distraction. Not just as a tool with which to make his lover jealous. Just for himself.
He moaned, sliding his tongue against mine and sending shock waves reverberating through my lower abdomen. I think I whimpered. I’m not proud of that, but there it was. A whimper; a loud proclamation of weakness. He sagged against me in apparent relief, mumbling in French and dropping kisses on my closed eyelids. “You see? You feel this too. Your body cannot lie to me, Chérie.” He pressed his forehead to mine and held me against him, our breath mingling. At first his eyes were closed, then he opened them and stared straight into mine. He was so close that he looked like a Cyclops. I pulled back a fraction of an inch until his face came into focus. His gaze never left mine. His eyes were unnaturally bright. He looked confused and sorrowful and maybe just a little bit smug.
“Why?” he asked. “Why did you leave me?”
My brows knit. What? What was he talking about? Reading the confusion on my face he elaborated on his question. “In France. I begged you to stay. Why didn’t you?”
I shook my head. “Julien. I couldn’t. You knew I couldn’t. I had to get back home-” He cut me off with another heated kiss. This one was more demanding. This time he was relentless - teasing, and coaxing a response from my more than willing body. Just as I was losing all ability to form a coherent thought he pulled away quickly and held my face between his hands, forcing me to look at him. We were both panting with arousal.
“I ask again, why? Why did you leave?”
I just stared at him, trying to catch my breath. Then, finally, “Julien, it wasn’t that simple. I-” He growled and kissed me again. My heart was slamming against my chest. My stomach flipped as I felt his hand run under the fabric of my shirt. He cupped my breast over my bra and swallowed my moan as my nipple hardened against the palm of his hand. I pressed against him, craving the solid feel of his embrace. “It is ‘that simple’” he said against my lips. “What could be more simple than this?”
Sudden Legacy Page 5