by Rhys Jones
“Does she?” Oz said airily.
“Now, I get chance to thank Skinner and Jenks in person.”
Oz glanced at Niko’s defiant expression and said, “Yeah, I think we’d all like that chance.”
The upstairs toilet was large, clean and completely empty as they filled their balloons.
“Not too much,” Ruff warned them, “otherwise they just become too floppy to throw.”
Beneath them, they could hear the bass thump of the music and the dull roar of three hundred excited pupils out for a good time. Ruff put twenty water-primed balloons into three plastic bags and gave one ten-pack to Oz. To Niko he gave a stubby black stick and a smaller cache of five balloons. He held the third bag, which also held five.
“What’s that for?” Oz said, glancing at the stick.
“Part of my cunning plan,” Ruff said. “Come on, let’s go. Got your mobile, Niko?”
Niko held up his phone.
“Text me when you’re in position. You make your move on my signal, okay?”
Niko nodded and quickly headed back the way they had come. Ruff led Oz in the opposite direction and down some stairs. At the end of another corridor, they emerged into a room that was full of the aroma of hot dogs and hamburgers and a crowd of milling, hungry pupils.
“Where’s Ellie?” yelled Oz, trying to make himself heard over the noise.
“Here somewhere.” Ruff scanned the crowd and pointed to a corner where Ellie was deep in conversation with some older girls. “Said she was on a mission,” Ruff said, shrugging.
Oz peered at the girls Ellie was with. “Hey, isn’t that Katie Sasco?”
“One of Pheeps’ Creeps, yeah, you’re right,” said Ruff.
“What’s Ellie doing…” But he never finished. Ruff had grabbed his arm and pulled him through the crowd.
“Come on, we can talk about all that later.”
They threaded their way through the sea of faces until they emerged into the relative calm of another corridor. Ruff went right and then left past classrooms and a science lab, until they found another set of stairs and descended quietly. Ruff put down his plastic bag of balloons and his fingers flew over the keys of his phone. A second later, there was a return text message.
“Right, Niko’s in position.”
“Great,” said Oz, “but where are we?”
“If I’m right, the boys’ toilets are through those double doors on the right. No one should be coming this way ’cos it doesn’t go anywhere except classrooms. Jenks and Skinner will be expecting you from the other direction, so we should be safe.”
Oz watched as Ruff moved towards the double doors, opened them a crack, got on his knees and slid his phone through at foot level. Five seconds later, he pulled the phone back and pressed some buttons. A video of the corridor flickered on the screen. There, halfway along, leaning against the wall, was Skinner. At his feet lay a pile of water balloons. Next to him, Jenks paced up and down.
“Ruff, that’s just brilliant,” Oz said, shaking his head with an admiring smile.
Ruff shrugged. “Old SAS trick from Desert Commandos 3. So, are you set?”
Oz nodded. Ruff held the phone to his ear and called Niko. “When you’re ready, mate. And remember, leave your phone on.” He turned to Oz, said, “Lock and buzzard load,” and reached into the bag for a water bomb.
Armed, they listened on Ruff’s phone speaker to the weird but unmistakable noise of Niko walking along with his phone switched on. Snatches of giggling were followed by the odd scream and guffaw, and then, after a period of silence, distant but unmistakable, Skinner’s sneering tones.
“Well, well. If it isn’t Igor. Who said you could come to our party, Igor?”
“Is not your party, Skinner. Is for everyone.”
“Yeah? Well, why don’t you and your little sister and your cabbage-eating family go back to where you came from?” Jenks’ voice this time, cold and hard, with no hint of humour.
“Yeah, go back to Moscow on a mule.”
“Moscow is in Russia,” Niko said. “And I hate cabbage.”
“Whatever,” Skinner said.
“Why do you want to live here, anyway? It rains all the time,” Jenks said.
“It rains in Poland, too,” Niko said.
“Not as much as here. Even rains inside, sometimes. Show him, Skinner.”
Ruff shouted, “Now,” and they burst through the double doors as the first salvo of water bombs from Skinner hit the broad black canopy of the automatic umbrella Ruff had given Niko, which he’d unfurled an instant before. Ruff and Oz let go a couple of quick throws each, which caught Jenks and Skinner completely by surprise. One lob from Ruff caught Jenks squarely in the chest as he turned, and a peach from Oz met with Skinner’s face and left him drenched and gasping like a landed fish. After that, there was no contest. Niko picked them off from the other side and Skinner and Jenks didn’t manage to get more than one throw each away before they were cornered, their own bombs forgotten as they huddled, arms over their faces, protesting loudly.
“Not the face! Not the face!” yelled Jenks.
“Three against two. Not fair,” Skinner whined, sounding like a spoiled three-year-old, before another direct hit caused the last word to come out as a gurgle.
“But you two against me, that was fair, was it?” Oz said. “Just like you two against Anya was fair, eh?” Even he was surprised by the anger in his voice. He let go another bomb, which splattered into the wall above Skinner, making him flinch.
“That was just a bit of a laugh, Chambers,” Jenks protested. It triggered a throw from Niko, which caught Jenks square on the side of the head.
“Not the face, I said.” His protests this time were tinged with a hint of a whimper.
“That was for Anya,” Niko said, his eyes flinty, “just for bit of laugh.”
“These next couple have got paint in them,” Ruff announced loudly. “Bit of an experiment with some fluorescent stuff I found in the lab upstairs.”
“No,” Skinner said, horrified. “This is a new shirt. My mum’ll kill me. I’m sorry, okay? I’ll say sorry to your sister, too, if you want.” He held both hands up towards Niko.
“And Jenks?”
Jenks’ face was as black as the interior of Gerber’s Rolls Royce. Under his soaked hair, he looked miserable and defeated, but still hesitated over saying the word.
Skinner turned to him, pleading. “Please, Jenks. It was meant to be just us against Chambers.” His voice dropped to a whisper. “If it’s her you’re worried about, she can have my money back. It isn’t worth it…”
“Shut up,” Jenks hissed, his eyes widening in warning. But it was too late.
“She? Did someone put you up to this?” Ruff asked.
Skinner suddenly looked terrified. Jenks’ mouth had become a thin, tight-lipped line.
“Okay, boys,” Oz said, seething, “on the count of three. Let them have it.”
“NO!” Skinner said. “If I tell you, will you let us go?”
“I’m listening,” Oz said.
The words seemed to run over one another as Skinner blurted them out. “It was Pheeps. She said you’d been bad-mouthing her. She gave us a fiver to get you soaked.”
Jenks gave Skinner a venomous look and shook his head. But Oz caught a second, surreptitious glance aimed at him, and in that look he saw tortured relief.
“Shall we let them have it, anyway?” Ruff asked.
“Let them go,” Oz said.
“What?” spluttered Jenks.
“Go,” repeated Oz.
Instantly, Jenks and Skinner pushed themselves away from the wall and ran soggily down the corridor, their hair sopping, Ruff and Niko laughing and lobbing the odd ballon at their heels as they ran. But Oz wasn’t laughing.
Pheeps.
He should have known that Jenks and Skinner couldn’t have planned something like this on their own. What was the matter with that girl?
Niko and Ruff collected the brok
en balloon skins and were now walking back slowly, comparing throws.
“You do know that they’re both idiotic scum, and what they say is total cobblers, don’t you?” Oz said to a beaming Niko.
“We have word for them in Polish. Glupek. Means bonehead.”
“Right, that’s their name from now on. Gloopecks,” Ruff said, and all three of them laughed.
“But better word is przyjaciel.”
“Chee a gel? What does that mean?” Oz asked.
“Friend,” Niko said, and held out his hand. Oz and Ruff shook it in turn.
“Right,” Ruff said, “we ought to get back. The Volcano’s on corridor patrol and I don’t want to run into her.”
They headed back towards the music, swapping stories of their best Gloopeck-destroying water bomb shots as they went.
While Ruff went in search of food, Oz found the dance floor. He had just finished dancing with Natasha Stilson, who didn’t seem at all bothered that Oz had been mainly responsible for the Lions taking the Skullers’ unbeaten record, and was on his way to find Ruff when the one thing he had really hoped wouldn’t happen, happened. He pushed through a tight throng of nattering girls and half-stumbled over someone’s clutch purse before colliding with the one person he had hoped to avoid. As always, she was wearing something that was so different from what everyone else wore that it made you look even if you didn’t want to. Oz had a vague idea that her outfit was probably very fashionable and wasn’t at all meant to make her look like a fungus, but to his unschooled eye that was exactly what came to mind. With a puffed-out skirt and a straight top, Pheeps looked like an upside-down mushroom.
“Watch where you’re going, Chambers,” she seethed, recoiling.
“It was an accident,” Oz said. He saw the way she quickly scanned him, and registered her twitch of disappointment at seeing him bone dry.
“Really?” An evil glint came into her eye. “Another deliberate accident, maybe? Your family seem to be experts at that.”
Oz immediately felt the colour rising in his cheeks. She had the knack of winding him up with very few words. “Look, I don’t know what your problem is, but if you’re saying that what happened to my dad was deliberate—”
“I don’t have to say it,” she cut across him like a knife, malevolent eyes glaring. “The coroner said it in a court. He said your father killed himself.”
“No, he didn’t. They couldn’t decide what happened, that’s all.”
“As good as.”
Oz looked at her pretty, malicious face, trying his best to understand why she was like this. “What is it with you? What did my dad do to make you hate us so much?”
“Don’t flatter yourself, Chambers. I’d have to care to hate you, and care about you, I most definitely do not—”
“That’s not true, though, is it?”
The voice came from behind Oz. He turned to see Ellie pushing through the crowd to stand toe to toe with Pheeps.
“Here she comes,” Pheeps sneered. “Chambers’ little girlfriend.”
“I am not his girlfriend. Never wanted to be. Unlike you, when you were nine.”
The smile faltered and withered on Pheeps’ face. “Nice try, Messenger, but why don’t you just buzz off and mind your own business?”
“I will if you will,” Ellie shot back.
“I’ll say what I want to say, thanks. Including telling everyone that Chambers’ father committed—”
“So,” said Ellie loudly, “you won’t mind me telling everyone that your mother wasn’t actually in hospital for twelve months, and that she isn’t ‘recuperating’ in Spain at all? She just left because she couldn’t stand the people your dad was mixing with, or his whingeing about coming second to Oz’s dad all the time, didn’t she?”
Pheeps threw a wild glance around to see who was listening and then hissed, “You keep my mother out of this.”
“Oz’s dad was about to get the job your dad has now, wasn’t he?”
“My dad works really hard. It wasn’t fair…” Her face, already scarlet, looked suddenly on the verge of tears. “Who told you all this? Who told you?” She reached out a hand and grabbed Ellie’s arm.
“I wouldn’t do that, if I were you,” Oz said calmly. “She does taekwando and stuff.”
Pheeps was breathing hard, her mouth a thin, ugly slash. But she let Ellie’s arm go.
“We shouldn’t be talking about this sort of thing here,” Ellie said. “Or in school. It’s not a topic for gossip.”
“If you breathe one word about my mother…” whispered Pheeps.
“I won’t say anything,” Ellie said. “But you know what you have to do, don’t you?”
“One day, Messenger,” Pheeps spat, “you’ll regret this big time.” With that she sent Oz one final, withering glare, turned on her heel and stormed off like an irate toadstool. Oz watched her go and then turned to Ellie, eyes wide with admiration.
“Where did you get all that from?”
“A friend,” said Ellie mysteriously. “Come on, you can buy me a Coke and I’ll tell you all about it.”
They found Ruff queuing for his third hot dog, got some drinks and retired to a quiet corner, where Oz and Ruff told Ellie about the water fight and listened as Ellie explained where she’d got the dirty on Pheeps.
“She doesn’t seem able to keep any of her friends for very long because she’s so possessive. Katie Sasco’s one of Pheeps’ ex-creeps. She plays in the hockey team with me. She’s really quite nice, once you get to know her.”
“But how did you find all that stuff out about her mother?”
“Pheeps’ mother has moved in with her sister. Katie’s aunt happens to live three doors away. That was probably why Pheeps wanted Katie as one of her ‘best friends,’ so she wouldn’t spill the beans.”
“So they aren’t best friends anymore?” ventured Ruff.
“Big bust-up a fortnight ago, because Katie bought a pair of shoes that Pheeps really wanted.”
Oz and Ruff exchanged bemused glances.
“I know, pathetic, isn’t it? Anyway, Heeps started mixing with Gerber and Pheeps’ mum didn’t like that at all, or the fact that he was really jealous of your dad’s research. And Katie also found one of Pheeps’ old diaries and you’re in it, Oz.” A mischievous grin spread over Ellie’s face. “It seems that she did have the hots for you once, and you ignored her.”
“Me?” Oz said, flummoxed.
“Admittedly, you were only nine at the time, so girls were probably just yucky.” She grinned and then added, under her breath, “Unlike now.”
“What that’s supposed to mean?” Oz demanded.
“How many times did you just dance with Natasha?” Ellie’s grin was bigger than a slice of watermelon.
“She’s a nice girl,” Oz mumbled.
Ellie nodded. “Unlike Pheeps, who is a nasty bit of work that you snubbed once. And you know what Miss Arkwright says in English about a woman scorned.”
“This is bonkers,” Oz said.
“Not as bonkers as Katie telling me that Pheeps’ dad’s study is full of books on you’ll never guess what.”
“How to be a buzzard gonk?” Ruff volunteered.
“No.” Eyes shining, she held their gazes for three long, suspenseful seconds before she finally announced, “Alchemy.”
“Wow, that’s a bit of a coincidence, isn’t it?” Ruff frowned.
Ellie rolled her eyes. “Katie showed me a photo she’d taken of a big blown-up poster on Pheeps’ dad’s wall. It’s a photo of the library panel in Penwurt, Oz. There was all sorts of stuff written over it, but I recognised it straight away.”
“How the hell did he get that?” Oz said.
“Lucy Bishop?” Ruff suggested.
“Of course,” Oz said. It was so obvious, now that he thought about it.
“But what it means,” Ellie went on, “is that our Mr. Heeps is probably a Puffer, too.”
Even Ruff stopped eating on hearing this.
“No wonder he took all of my dad’s stuff,” Oz said, hardly able to believe how stupid he’d been. “He wasn’t looking for university property at all. He was looking for Morsman stuff.”
“And we know he’s big pals with Gerber,” Ruff said.
“And Lucy Bishop,” Oz muttered.
“I bet they’re all in it together.” Ellie nodded.
Oz felt something flash through his head. Some little piece of understanding that he knew was important, but which stayed annoyingly out of reach. Frustrated, he tutted and said, “I just wish we knew a bit more about Gerber.”
Ellie shook her head. “He’s really difficult to research. He’s not on Facebook and there’s hardly anything on Google. Just boring stuff about his businesses.”
“All I found out was that ‘gerber’ means someone who makes animal hides in German,” Ruff mumbled.
“Oh, wowee,” Ellie sighed and shook her head sadly.
“Then we’re back to finding out what the images on my laptop are all about,” Oz muttered.
Ruff, who had happily begun murdering his third mustard and ketchup-laden hot dog, suddenly gagged and ended up depositing a revolting mouthful of chewed sausage and bread in the nearest bin, while Ellie and Oz looked on in disgust.
“Yuck,” Ellie said. “That’s so gross.”
“Sorry, nearly choked on me lightly toasted bun then,” Ruff said when he rejoined them, wiping his mouth. “I knew there was something I’d forgotten.” He suddenly looked extremely sheepish. “Uh, the code,” he muttered. “I think I cracked it this afternoon before I came out.”
“What?” yelled Oz and Ellie together.
“I was going to tell you,” Ruff said, flinching under their accusatory glares, “but Niko texted me, and then—”
“There was food,” said Ellie, shaking her head.
Ruff looked suddenly annoyed. “No, there was Jenks and Skinner about to take out Oz,” he said hotly. “I didn’t forget, I prioritized, remember? And if we hadn’t stopped them, they’d have gone after Niko for sure. It should be mates first, shouldn’t it?”
Ellie stared at him and Oz wondered if they were going to argue again. But then Ellie nodded and said, “Totally. You’re right, it should be mates first. Sorry.”