Brynn’s green eyes were glued to Sam’s collar. “I’m glad to see Sam is so well taken care of, Sebastian. When you moved in next door to her at The Shallows, I had my doubts.”
“I was just saying the same thing,” Ren spoke up. “I didn’t think he could sway Sam to his way of thinking.”
Sam was getting ready to start hurling profanities. Was everyone aware of the stunt Sebastian had pulled? Were they all Doms, or subs, or members of that strange society?
“That reminds me, Sebastian.” Brynn angled closer to him, showing the curve of her cleavage. “I wanted to ask you about your apartment. If you no longer need it, I was going to rent it out.”
“I don’t plan on going back,” he told her. “I loved the view, but that funny smell in the living room was driving me crazy.”
“What smell?”
“It was a heavy, sweet smell, like a woman wearing too much perfume. I told your handyman, Marv, about it a few times, but he could never find the source.”
Brynn furrowed her smooth brow. “I’ll have to ask him about it. We need to find out the problem before another renter moves in.”
Sebastian dipped his head to Sam. “Sam never had any problems in her place, did you?”
Sam’s mouth dried up. Her eyes darted between Sebastian and Brynn. “Ah, no. No funny smells in my apartment.”
“Are you all right?” Sebastian whispered to her.
Ren stepped up to Brynn’s side. “I don’t see a drink in your hand. I think we need to remedy that situation immediately.”
Brynn laughed as he took her elbow. “You haven’t changed, Ren.”
Ren coiled her hand around his jacket sleeve. “Let’s find the bar, get very drunk, and reminisce about the good ole days, shall we?” Before he stepped away, Ren glanced to Sebastian. “We’ll talk again, soon.”
Watching Brynn and Ren stroll away, Sam grumbled, “You want to tell me what’s with you and Ren Plancharde?”
“Sam, you need to lower your voice.”
Sam spied the happy revelers at the party. “Brynn’s one of you, isn’t she? She’s a Dom, too.”
“Brynn isn’t like me,” he admitted. “She’s a sub, like you. Or was a long time ago.”
“And Ren Plancharde?”
Sebastian rolled his eyes. “He’s just an instigator, not a Dom.”
“What about the things he said about Nathan?”
“He was talking about something that happened before Nathan disappeared. Brynn suffered cruelly while she was with Nathan Cole. From what I hear, a lot of women did. Ren was referring to Nathan being reprimanded for abuses of The Corde Noire Society rules. That’s all.”
“Are you going to make me a member of this society?” Sam drained the rest of the champagne from her glass.
“No. My days with the Corde Noire Society are over. Ren just doesn’t know it yet.” He took away her empty flute and set it on a passing waiter’s tray. “Let’s get you something to eat.”
After perusing the wide variety of silver chaffing dishes, Sam selected a serving of the trout almandine, while Sebastian went with the crawfish fettuccini with a side of etouffee. Taking a table at the edge of the extensive patio, Sam relaxed … or perhaps it was the two glasses of champagne she had hastily downed.
“Did you go to a lot of parties like this growing up?”
“Yes, had to.” He took another sip of champagne. “The superficiality of these things used to drive me crazy. Still does in a way.” He motioned to his mother, sitting in her wheelchair on the veranda, surrounded by well-wishers. “When she was in the hospital, no one came to see her. Once she was home, her so-called friends stayed away. If the people here tonight only knew what it has taken for her to get this far. All they will talk about tomorrow is how bad she looked, or the wheelchair she was in, never about her progress.”
“You love her a great deal, don’t you?”
He put his glass on the white tablecloth. “She’s my mother. Of course I love her.”
“Just because she’s your mother doesn’t mean she deserves your respect. My mother never had mine. But then again, neither did my father.” She rested her elbows on the table, momentarily mesmerized by the flickering candle inside the crystal centerpiece. “My dad was a lot like your father, except he never left us physically, just emotionally.”
“Your father cared about you, Sam. I’m sure he still does.”
“He never cared, Sebastian. It was all about the show with him, never the substance. Whatever it took to keep people giving money to his church: lie, cheat, steal … sleep with the wives of his congregation members. He did it all.”
Sebastian eased forward in his chair. “The church leader you mentioned that night in my office was your father, wasn’t it? He was the one having affairs on the church’s dime.”
She nodded, clutching her flute. “Nothing like finding out about your father’s infidelity and then having to cover it up by fudging the books. After that night in the fraternity house, I knew he didn’t give a damn about me. I had committed fraud to protect him, but he wouldn’t lift a finger to help me when I needed him most. What kind of parent is that?”
“Sounds like your old man and mine had a lot in common.”
After finishing the last sips of her champagne, Sam set her glass down. “But your father is reaching out to you, Sebastian. I think he hangs around your penthouse to tell you how sorry he is for the way things turned out.”
Sebastian sat back, gaping at her. “Did he tell you that?”
“He doesn’t need to tell me. I’ve felt it since the first day you brought me to your home. And you know what else? He’s not happy about what you are.”
“Are we still talking about my old man’s ghost, or you, Sam?”
Sam wanted to give him a witty reply, but the combination of champagne and her bruised emotions were muddling her mind.
“It’s getting late. We should go.” Pushing back his chair, he stood from the table. Sam rose unsteadily to her feet, making Sebastian grab for her arm. “Can you walk?”
Giggling, she pushed his hand away. The buzz from her champagne was kicking into high gear. “I’m fine.”
His strong arm went around her back. “You’re drunk.”
“Not drunk, tipsy. If I was drunk, I wouldn’t be standing.” She leaned a little too far to the right and wobbled on her high heels. “Maybe I’m a little more than tipsy.”
Instead of scowling, he smiled at her. Shouldn’t he be mad?
“Let’s get you to the car before you hurt yourself.”
With one arm holding her upright, Sebastian removed his phone from his jacket pocket and sent a text.
When they arrived at the entrance on St. Charles Avenue, a limousine pulled up, and Eric jumped out from the driver’s side door.
“Glad you were close by,” Sebastian commented.
Eric hurried to the back passenger door. “Just around the corner, Mr. Dane.”
After they had settled in the back seat, Sam removed her shoes and began rubbing her sore insoles. Sebastian lifted her feet into his lap and took over, working the ache out of her arches.
“That feels good.”
“You did well tonight. I’m proud of you.”
When the car hit a pothole, Sam grabbed her head. “I think that champagne is starting to get to me.”
He let go of her feet and put his arm around her. “I think you’re right.”
“Are you mad at me?”
Pulling away from her, he went to the control panel behind the driver’s seat and punched the button that raised the divider, blocking Eric’s view into the back of the car. Returning to Sam, he wrapped his left arm around her, holding her close. “I can never be mad at you, Sam. Don’t you know that?”
“Never?” She raised her face to his, pouting her lips together. “Then what have you been?”
* * *
The way the light was shining in her upturned eyes, along with her seductive pout, was eating him alive. Unable to stand
his desperation any longer, Sebastian crashed his lips into hers.
The tremble of surprise from her only made him pull her closer. He deepened his kiss, and when she parted her lips, Sebastian was defeated by her surrender.
He had been able to keep her at arm’s length for quite a while, avoiding touching her, kissing her … hell, he had even been bathing alone to avoid getting too close. But now the days of agony were finally taking their toll; he had to have her.
He pushed her back on the seat, kissing her neck and slipping the wide straps of her dress from her shoulders. He wanted to rip the gown from her body and feel her supple skin. Reaching around to her back, he eased down the zipper.
She shoved his tuxedo jacket over his shoulders. Her frenzied movements seemed to match his, adding to his hunger for her. After wrestling out of his jacket, he was undoing his black tie while she ripped open the buttons on his shirt. When the cool air hit his naked chest, her hands were all over him.
Sebastian yanked the bodice down her chest, desperate to get his mouth on her nipples. He bit down hard on her right nipple and she arched into him. He was tugging at her dress, shoving it down her hips. He finally got the long gown out from under her and dropped it to the floor of the limousine.
With only a pair of black lacy underwear left to remove, he grew hard as he edged them over her thighs. Sam was reaching for the zipper of his pants, nibbling his neck.
Dipping his fingers into her folds, he almost groaned with longing. She was so wet, so ready for him. Unable to wait any longer, he pulled her hips under him, spread her knees apart, and struggled to free his cock from his briefs.
Touching his tip to her wet flesh, he closed his eyes and sighed before he dove into her. She closed around him, taking him into her with a soft moan. God, she felt wonderful.
Why has no other woman felt like this?
His desire took over and he lost all sense of himself. He pulled out and slammed into her, making her gasp. Her nails dug into his chest as he moved, driven by his need to make her his.
The urge that started as a warm rush in his groin climbed higher. Sebastian was grunting as the climax hit him, desperate to give in to his need to come. When he felt that unstoppable surge rising in him, he held her tight and thrust into her with such force, he swore she would cry out for him to stop.
But she didn’t want him to stop. Her heels pressed into his butt, encouraging him to go deeper. He complied and was merciless in his assault. She was bending beneath him, her lips on his neck, and when she shuddered, her teeth clamped down on his flesh. Her ravenous bite was the last thing he remembered before he came.
He was arching over her, breathing hard and amazed at how good it had been. Then, he realized what he had done, and his peaceful afterglow turned into abject panic.
“Shit.”
“What?” Sam cupped his cheek. “What’s wrong?”
“I didn’t put on a condom.” He gazed down into her face. “I wanted … I got carried away.” He moved off her and settled back on the long seat. “I haven’t been that stupid in years.”
Sam sat up, reaching for her dress. “We’re fine. My period is due any day now.”
He glanced over at her, realizing how crass he must have sounded. “I didn’t mean ….” He touched her thigh. “I enjoyed it. Very much.”
Her eyes were glistening with what looked like tears. “You did?”
“More than anything.” He helped her collect her gown. “We’d better get you dressed before Eric opens the door and finds you naked.”
She giggled. “Wouldn’t that be something?”
Sebastian hid his anger behind a weak smile. He couldn’t let her see how disgusted he was with himself. He had let her get to him. Sam had conquered the last vestiges of discipline he had fought so hard to hold on to. Sebastian Dane was no longer a Dom. He was hers.
The sun was shining through the bedroom windows when Sebastian opened his eyes. He was tired, very tired. It was as if the emotional upheaval in his life was finally bearing down on him. Stretching to the side of the bed, he found her spot was empty.
Bolting upright, he searched the bedroom. For almost three weeks, he had been the one waking her every morning. Now, she was the one who was already up. He didn’t like how it felt.
Shoving the covers aside, he climbed from the bed and spied her dress and his tuxedo on the bench by the bathroom entrance. Stepping into the bathroom, he called for her, but she was not there. When he came out, he found her. Standing by the door to the hall, she was holding a mug of steaming coffee in her hands.
“Figured you could use this.”
When he saw her clad only her black lace panties and diamond collar, he instantly wanted her all over again. It seemed as if he couldn’t stop wanting her lately.
“You’re up early.” He strode up to her, taking the coffee from her hand. “Are you feeling all right?”
She nodded and clasped her hands behind her back. “I, ah … had to get up early.” Her eyes shot to the floor. “My period started, so I won’t be able to walk around naked for a few days.”
“It’s okay, Sam. I understand.” He took a sip of coffee and then peered into the black liquid. “I want to talk to you about last night.”
“I shouldn’t have gotten so tipsy. I’m sorry.”
She made a move to walk away, but he held her forearm. “That’s not it. I wanted to talk about what happened in the car.”
“What about it?”
“I don’t usually attack women like that. I also haven’t forgotten to use a condom in a very long time. I wanted to apologize for that.”
She knitted her brow. “Apologize? You don’t have to apologize, Sebastian. It was the first time in weeks that I felt you wanted me, not as a slave or sub, but as me … Sam.” She eased closer to him. “I wish it could always be that way.”
He squeezed his coffee mug so tight, he thought it was going to shatter in his hand. “It was a lapse in judgment.”
The hint of devastation in her blue orbs troubled him. “Whatever you say … Master.” Her hands went to the collar around her neck. “I forgot to give this back to you last night.”
“I was thinking … we should consider your training at an end. I want you to remain here with me.”
“You want me to stay, permanently?”
He put his coffee mug down on his bedside table. “Yes. I think it’s what we both want.”
She glanced down at the collar in her hand. “You want me to stay as your sub, right?”
“Of course.”
“But last night in the limo, I wasn’t your sub … I was yours.” She stared into his eyes. “Before I can give you my answer, I need to know how you feel about me.”
The comment impacted him like a nuclear bomb. How did he reply? How did he tell her how much she meant to him, without sacrificing his position as her Dom? Love was death to any Dom-sub relationship, because love made two people equal.
“I care for you, Sam.”
“Care?” The pain in her voice reverberated around the bedroom.
“Don’t ask me to give you more than that. I can’t.”
She dropped the diamond collar on the bed. “I understand.” Heading to the bedroom door, she called over her shoulder, “I’ll get started on breakfast.”
He wanted to run after her and tell her all the confusing and terrifying feelings in his heart. Instead, he made his way to the bathroom, plotting how he could get out of the house on a Sunday. Sebastian needed to spend some time away from her. He needed to figure out his next move.
* * *
It was after noon when Sebastian returned from his office, having told Sam he was going to catch up on paperwork. But that hadn’t been what he had really done. After making some coffee, Sebastian had sat down at his desk and spent most of the morning thinking … about her. He had devised a hundred different ways to tell her how he felt, but every show of emotion went against his grain as a Dom. It was as if there were two sides to hi
s heart: the one that wanted Sam, and the one fighting to remain what he was.
Entering his penthouse, he listened for any sounds of her, but it seemed eerily quiet. Guessing she was in his office—where she spent most of her time—he trotted up the stairs. When he passed his open bedroom door, something made him stop and look inside. The bed had been made, and his tuxedo and her dress put away. He went to the bathroom to see if she was there, and then it struck him.
Her toothbrush and hairbrush were missing from the vanity countertop. Racing to her closet, he inspected her clothes. The ones he had purchased for her were still there, but when he opened the built-in dresser, he discovered the jeans and T-shirts she had brought with her were gone. Even the black duffel bag was absent from the closet floor.
Dashing from the bedroom, he went to the stairs. Bounding down the steps two at a time, his heart racing, he ducked into the kitchen. On the island, he discovered a pink slip of paper.
Sebastian,
I wish I could put into words what being with you has meant to me, but I think you already know. Thank you for the offer, but I can’t go on being your sub. After what we shared last night, I just can’t continue. I don’t want to be your possession any longer. It would be betraying what I feel for you. What I have always felt for you.
I hope one day you find happiness with another. You deserve it. More than anyone I know.
Take care of yourself. I’ll miss you.
Sam
Sebastian stumbled against the counter. His world had just been snatched out from under him. How in the hell could he go on without her?
The emptiness of her bed, the silence of her bedroom, the chill of not having him next to her … all of it was too much for Sam. Lying in her bed, staring up at the ceiling, she fought the urge to cry, yet again. It was all she had done since returning home. She couldn’t eat, couldn’t think, and now she couldn’t sleep.
Sam tried to occupy her mind with a list of things she needed to do to get her life back in order, without much success. As long as Sebastian was in her head, moving on was going to be a challenge.
It was a little after three when Sam gave up on sleep and got out of bed. In her bathroom, she stood for what seemed like hours staring at her image in the mirror. She didn’t recognize herself any longer. The bright girl she had been was gone, replaced by the hollow features of a woman … a woman in love.
Dark Attraction: The Corde Noire Series Page 23