Woman on top is also common, and fairly comfortable on average, given a woman’s generally smaller size than a man. Most men don’t seem to have any problem with looking up into a woman’s pussy, and often prefer this position.
Male on top is probably the least common, again due to the male’s usually larger frame, but in cases of equally sized male and female partners, there may be little or no concerns with the male on top. Similarly, woman on woman in the "Backwards" position may often involve similarly sized partners intermittently switching positions as the mood strikes them.
In addition, options include one partner licking the other, or both licking each other simultaneously. This could involve cunnilingus with fellatio, or mutual cunnilingus in the case of two women.
The main drawback to mutual genital licking and kissing, is that it can be very difficult to concentrate on what you’re doing to and for your partner, when you are cumming yourself! One other great advantage to facing her feet instead of the more common position of facing her head, is that your tongue will be more often and easily stroking down from her mons toward her pussy, avoiding the irritation (to her) of stroking upwards and over the sensitive clit, as it’s still protected by the clitoral hood.
You’ll want to experiment with all of these variations – there are good reasons why this is one of the most common positions during lovemaking. It suits many needs and desires, and can easily bring great pleasure to both partners.
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"I only do lesbian and solo gigs. Yeah, I like playing with myself for the camera, but I absolutely adore feeling another girl licking my pussy, and the taste, fragrance and feel of a girl’s hot and wet cunt on my face. Even more than that, girls just know way more about turning on another woman – they appeal to every sense, and pay attention to the ‘getting there’ more than just ‘being there’, you know what I mean? Am I a lesbian, lol, that’s STBD (Still To Be Determined)!" – Shayla (adult film actress)
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Taking Her From the Rear
In this position, both partners are situated relative to each other similarly to their position in ‘Doggy Style’ intercourse, with the difference being that the rear partner’s face will be where either a penis or a dildo would be placed. The woman can be on all fours, either with head up, which does tend to restrict access somewhat to her vulva, or with head down on the mattress or pillow, which opens her up for greater access by the giving partner, inside her pussy and to her clit, though not as well there as in some other positions.
The woman will tend to feel very submissive in this position, which can certainly add to the excitement, as she may feel that she’s being "slutty." This has both positive and negative aspects – she may be shy and inhibited about it, or she may feel free to indulge wildly in sex. Conversation is always helpful to see how she’s feeling about it, as is paying attention to her movements and facial expressions when this position comes up.
The giving partner can position himself with his nose at the woman’s clit, and his mouth on her pussy (lying on his back), or crouched behind in a reversed position at her vulva, i.e., with his nose at her pussy and his mouth at her clit. Both positions have their advantages. Trying both positions out may result in discovering that the woman prefers one way over the other. The only way to know, is to try it!
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"I thought it was kind of dirty at first. Matt was behind me, looking at my butt, and I thought he’d say something about it being fat. But when he pushed his face into my pussy, and started licking, I pretty much stopped thinking about that, it felt really good. I was kinda surprised when he pushed my face down into the pillow, but that’s when he started tonguing my clit, and god! I came, a couple of times!
He later told me that he really liked doing me that way, almost as much as fucking. P.S. He said he doesn’t think my butt is fat, it’s just right." – Cecilia, 39
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SOMF
SOMF, aka ‘Sit On My Face,’ can be wildly exciting for a woman, because it puts her in complete control of, well, everything. Generally, she’ll be sitting upright, resting her body on her shins, with the man lying on his back, facing up at the front of her body. This places her vulva over his mouth, with his nose accessible to her clit and his mouth on her pussy, although of course, she can shift her body to receive the stimulation that she desires at any part of her vulva.
Men may also become excited by this position, as the submissive position he assumes is relatively unusual for the male in intercourse with a woman. It’s certainly easy for the woman to see how he’s taking it, by turning her head and looking at his penis! Still, just as talking about it helps a man understand how a woman perceives his attentions, the woman in this position should not just assume that the man loves it.
She can learn more about his feelings regarding this position, by making it part of the game:
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"Do you like having my hot pussy on your face, baby? Do you like eating my hole, tasting my cum dripping in your mouth? Lick my cunt, stud, make me cum!"
* * *
Okay, I’m not sure whether he’ll be absolutely truthful then, or if he’ll even be able to respond verbally with a pussy on his face, but the men I’ve been with all tell me afterwards that they really like the "turnabout" of being dominated – however, I always give them the opportunity to dominate me afterward, so they don’t feel like I’m being a bitch.
There’s a really interesting communication that happens with both partners’ eyes in this position, since at least one partner may not be able to respond all that well otherwise. Watch for it, it’s very intimate and may help both partners feel a little closer (although having a woman sit on your face is already a rather intimate act!)
One concern about this position – the woman must not get so carried away that she actually suffocates her submissive partner! I’ve never heard of any casualties, but it’s conceivable that if you drive her that wild, she may not be as completely focused on her partner as she is on her own orgasm. That’s not a bad thing, but should be kept in mind. This is a really great position for a woman to think almost purely about her own pleasure – and that’s your goal in cunnilingus, right?
An interesting variation on this position – call it "Reverse Cowgirl," to borrow a phrase, will have the woman positioned over the man’s face, but facing towards his feet. This is also an exciting position for both, but movement of the woman’s pelvis can swing her ass over his face. Again, this isn’t necessarily a bad thing if both partners want it, but if a giving partner isn’t into the butt, he or she may object to having their partner’s ass in their face, even if only briefly and inadvertently.
In either position, if the giving partner is experiencing neck discomfort, a well-placed pillow can alleviate that. Remember that the woman can cant her body from any angle from nearly 180 degrees (lying back on her partner’s legs) to 90 degrees (sitting straight up on the partner’s face) to almost 0 degrees (bowing down to the mattress while still on her knees.) There are tons of variations to explore for both partners’ pleasure.
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"I’ve been through a marriage and divorce, and a bunch of girlfriends since, but I never knew what I was missing until my current girlfriend, Beth. Oh, I’d licked pussy, but I didn’t really get a lot of positive feedback from the women I’d eaten, until Beth. She talked to me while she was sitting on my face, and pretty soon she was cumming like a fucking wild woman when I did what she suggested.
She got so satisfied, that she asked me if I liked the idea of inviting her best friend in bed with us, too. Would I? Shit, yeah! What guy doesn’t want to try a threesome? Her friend is really cute, too, and we’ve done it, I guess, a half dozen times, with me licking and fucking them both, then, after I cum, I watch them lick each other’s cunts, too. But I’ve got to tell you, being with two beautiful, uninhibited women is way better than Viagra – I’m good for two, sometimes three orgasms during those ‘dates,’ as Beth calls them.
/> The funny thing? Beth’s friend is married, and cheating on her husband. That guy just does not know what he’s missing. Do I feel guilty? What do you think?" – Jim, 41
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Kneeling
In this position, the woman will be on her back near the edge of the bed, with the edge of the mattress somewhere between her butt and her knees. The man will be on his knees on the floor, with his face at her vulva. Obviously in what’s described as a ‘praying’ position. It may be a little difficult for the woman to find the very best position for her that also brings her vulva exactly to the edge, as it’s very awkward, if not impossible, to allow her legs to hang down while she’s flat on her back – although I suppose there are some gymnasts who could accomplish it! Generally, the man will need to lean forward a bit over the mattress, but if the woman spreads her legs sufficiently, this works very well.
The woman may find it a little more comfortable in this position to place one or both feet or legs on the man’s back, alleviating adverse pressure on her hip joints.
Soaring Through the Azure
This is much like the "Legs on Bed" or "Legs Up" positions, except that the man’s arms will be stretched out on the upper part of the woman’s body, caressing her breasts and nipples, and depending on the partners’ relative heights, playing with his fingers at her lips. It’s very erotic for both if he’s simultaneously penetrating her pussy with his tongue, with his finger(s) penetrating her mouth.
However, this position is not for amateurs or the easily distracted, as it requires both partners pay attention to two different areas of the body at the same time, while being pleasured at both points. Still, it’s a fun variation, but check with your partner afterward to see if they enjoyed it as much as you might have.
Dominatrix
A lot of men adore this position, I think because it’s both a little submissive, really hot, and it makes the woman look pretty slutty if she does it right. The woman leans back against the wall, with her hips pushed out, while the man kneels and licks her pussy.
She’s free to adjust her position to suit herself, and cumming is pretty easy, as long as she’s in the right frame of mind.
Another version of this has her standing, with one foot raised higher on a chair or ottoman or bed, exposing her pussy even more, and the man again kneeling between her legs, licking her. Of course, if you want to carry this over into S & M, the man can be wearing a collar and leash. This position certainly helps give a woman an increased self-confidence, with or without the collar and leash!
And a variation scenario that my boyfriends go wild with, is the "Coat Room." I’m dressed in a demure top, and a long, ankle length skirt with a long slit up the side, requiring the man to pull my skirt apart and pull my panties down to lick my wet pussy, and all the while I’m pretending to be the coat check girl at a restaurant or concert, standing in my lonely little booth with no one to keep me company but the hot man eating my cunt, while I make random conversation with the imaginary customers leaving or picking up their coats!
The Doctor is IN
This position is kind of freaky, but some women actually prefer it. Basically, you’re duplicating the position she will assume at her gynecologist’s office during an exam, but without the props like stirrups (the things she usually has to put her feet in when she spreads for the doctor.) In this version, the woman lies on her back with her legs spread and her knees up, feet either flat or elevated on pillows. Alternatively, you can use a table to duplicate the harder surface of an examination table. The man sits in a rolling chair (if you have one) and his tongue substitutes for the doctor’s speculum inserted inside her vagina.
Yeah, it’s definitely kinky, but some women really love it – I know I prefer a warm, wet tongue in my pussy a lot more than a cold, stainless steel tool!
* * *
"My husband and I play doctor sometimes. I love having him inspect all my holes, and he’s got the best cock and tongue for probing all of them!" – Liz, 37.
* * *
Circus Tent
I can’t vouch for this position, but it sounds like a lot of fun – you just need to be pretty strong if you’re supporting the woman. Basically, the woman will lie on her stomach on the bed, with legs hanging over the edge. The man kneels and slips her legs over his shoulders, then slowly rises up until he is either standing or sitting, with her thighs around his head, her pussy in his face, and her mouth at his crotch. You could visualize it like a standing 69.
You should be very careful if you decide to try this – the potential for disaster is very high if you get tired or can’t support her weight. Also, remember, the woman is hanging upside down, with blood flowing down into her head – that could cause a big headache if it goes on too long!
Warnings and Common Problems
Dry Vagina
Please understand that vaginal dryness commonly doesn’t have much to do with whether a woman is interested in you or not. Very often in my erotic writing I use ‘wetness’ as a metaphor for the degree of a woman’s interest and excitement, but that’s not necessarily reality all of the time.
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"During Michael‘s caresses, after he had kissed her in a way no man had before, Lisa felt herself wetting, her pussy almost uncomfortable as her hot, silken cream oozed from her slit, staining her panties. She smiled, knowing that he would be cleaning up the fragrant, hot mess between her legs with his long, thick tongue. Her heartbeat became rapid, her nipples erect – she knew that she was going to get fucked, both royally and soon."
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In real life, the most common reason for a woman’s vaginal dryness in spite of your best seduction techniques, is lowered estrogen production, which occurs normally several times during the month. Other reasons for this lowered estrogen level are: pregnancy and childbirth, menopause, emotional stress, from anti-depressant use, and many other reasons – none of which are likely to have anything to do with either your ability and technique as a lover, or with her interest level in you.
So please be understanding of this condition, and be prepared to help her overcome it. That way, you both benefit from improved and pleasurable sex, right?
The two courses of action that can be taken obviously involve her understanding of the condition, and desire to address it. For her part, the woman should stay hydrated during these occurrences. Drinking the recommended amount of water each day is good for weight control, as many women realize, but it also helps to keep skin soft and the vaginal canal moist. Other things that she should at least be aware of include an eating regimen that helps to balance her hormone levels (such as soy), and the availability of water-based vaginal lubricants.
Besides letting her know about dietary solutions, if she’s willing, you can suggest that application of vaginal gel be a shared activity, making it both fun and productive. Often, a woman will feel that she’s sharing herself with you when you both participate in applying lotions or gels whose function is to moisturize, so you might pick up some ‘caring’ points with her. I don’t recommend this for hemorrhoid creams, though...<smile>
And if it hadn’t occurred to you, you certainly have an opportunity to help moisturize your woman’s vagina "naturally" yourself while performing cunnilingus, don’t you? Okay, then!
Vaginal Farts
Ordinarily, vaginal flatulence is an entirely normal and natural consequence of pumping air into the woman’s vagina as your cock moves in and out. Think of the old style air pumps that you used to pump up a football, basketball or bicycle tire. It’s the same ‘piston-and-cylinder’ principle.
It’s called a ‘queef,’ or ‘vaginal fart,’ and she’s probably a little embarrassed when it happens, though it’s completely harmless and certainly nobody’s fault. Try to avoid jokes, because, no matter how funny you think it is, she is going to see it as being the same as an intestinal fart, and we’re all embarrassed about those (or should be.)
If she’s really concerned, or if it happens a lot, the
re are some other conditions that can cause this, some of them serious, so she should see her doctor in those instances. A fistula, or a connection between the vagina and colon, is one serious condition that can sometimes cause this, with an accompanying odor, unlike common vaginal flatulence, which is odorless.
Kegel exercises are also useful in lessening the occurrence the normal vaginal flatulence, by strengthening the pelvic muscles. She probably already knows how to do those, and it’s fun to have her show them off to you when you’re naked together!
Women CAN Fake It
As you may have observed from "When Harry Met Sally," it’s not always easy to tell when a woman is faking an orgasm. The first question you might ask if you suspect someone is faking, is "Why"?
If you recall, statistics show that a large percentage of women do not orgasm, based on the lack of appropriate stimulation. I’m not pointing any fingers with that statement – sexual relations involve more than one person, and it’s the responsibility of everyone involved to do what they can to ensure orgasm for their partner(s), and themselves.
So, if a woman isn’t orgasming, she bears some responsibility to speak up and cooperate with her partner – not in pretending that everything is fine. Of course, women are often reluctant to do anything that would hurt their partner’s feelings, given that she must have an attraction and fondness for him on some level, as evidenced by having sex with him.
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