Heart Untouched

by Andrew Grey

  He sat down, and the screen blipped before Todd stared at himself. The scrape of the sled on the concrete had been amplified, and even he smiled at the antic. The commercial’s dynamic, especially with the short clip that had been chosen of him on the run, just worked. The humor came across, as did a sense of action and interest. By the time the thirty-second ad was over, Todd was ready to pick up the phone to make an appointment.

  Everyone clapped, and the second, shorter spot ran. It was cut down to the basics, with the humor intact.

  “You did a great job,” Duncan told him and then leaned closer. “And you look sexy in your practice suit. Maybe I could take a closer look later.” He winked, and Todd rolled his eyes to try to keep from blushing.

  “Once the commercials air, we will be adding them, along with some additional teasers, to our website. We’re working to add functionality to allow customers to book their appointments directly through the site, but that is taking a little longer than we’d hoped, and I don’t want to add something that will be a detriment or only half thought through. So, stay tuned.” The servers began taking orders and bringing drinks.

  It was a happy party, with the commercials being shown a few more times as others arrived—Trevor’s way of celebrating the ad, but also thanking all of his employees for their hard work.

  “What’s next?” James asked Duncan. “Trevor described the commercial to me, and I think it’s a great idea.”

  “Well, I’m thinking winter. Maybe having Todd try to ice skate with his sled through the parking lot. Something like that. We have plenty of footage that we can use of him on his runs, and even some of him wiping out. There’s one that’s pretty hilarious.” Duncan took his hand, and Todd had to agree. “So, I was thinking of an ad that centered on fender benders and getting back on track after an accident. I need to work on it, but it could be really good.” He smiled and then, remembering James couldn’t see, touched the back of his hand.

  “I think that will be awesome,” James said as his attention wandered while servers moved around him. “Thanks,” he said when his glass was placed near him.

  Duncan guided James’s hand to the glass so he would know where it was and got a smile in return.

  “Excuse me, this is a private party,” a server said.

  Duncan looked up as Corrina pushed past the server and marched toward him. Duncan rolled back away from the table. “What are you doing here?” he asked, continuing toward the door. He needed to get her out of the room and learn why she’d seen fit to interrupt the party. “What do you want?” Duncan asked once they were in the main dining room. He peered back inside, catching Todd’s eye.

  “Look, I’m in trouble. I don’t have enough to pay the rent and am going to be evicted.” She wrung her hands, eyes wild, as though she’d been taking something. God knew what, but Duncan backed away. “You and I were supposed to work together and everything was going to be fine. We’d have made a good team, and now….”

  “That was before the accident, and even then you weren’t doing your share of the work. You wanted to play around and schmooze, but when it came to the real work, you left that to me. I couldn’t go into business with someone who wasn’t going to pull their weight.” He glanced around and made sure his voice remained low so he didn’t disturb others, but he was firm. “There isn’t anything I can do to help you.”

  Todd came out and stood behind him, putting his hand on his shoulder, and Duncan placed his own on top of it. “What do you want?” Todd demanded. “You’ve hounded and pestered Duncan for something that’s never going to happen. You need to walk away, get on with your life, and leave him alone. We’re sorry that things didn’t work out between you, but that’s over. Now let it go.”

  Duncan felt so much better knowing Todd had his back. He met her gaze as Corrina’s lips curled into a snarl.

  “You’ll pay for this. The two of us could have been great together, but I’ll show you. I’ll start my own business, and I’ll be more successful than you will ever be. I’ll show you.” Her pupils were huge, and sweat broke out on her forehead, little bits of spittle flying from her mouth. She ran her hands over her stomach, making small circles on her rounded belly as though she were trying to calm herself, and Duncan stifled a gasp as he realized Corrina was pregnant. “Damn you, Duncan,” she said much more loudly. “I will make you pay.” She whirled around and stomped out, brushing against people as she made her way past the bar to the door.

  Duncan shook as he watched her go, genuinely afraid. “She isn’t….”

  Todd squeezed his shoulder. “That girl needs help. A lot of it.”

  Duncan nodded and pulled out his phone. “It isn’t only her who needs it.” He scratched his head, wondering who he could call to try to get her some of the care she needed. He sure as hell wasn’t going to call her brother. He was as out of control as she was.

  Duncan sent a message to Corrina’s mother and received a reply that she had no idea where her daughter was and wasn’t responsible for her. Great, what a hell of a family. No wonder Corrina was frantic.

  “You can’t help her,” Todd said.

  Duncan nodded. He knew whatever was going on was out of his control and beyond his ability. “But I have to do something,” he countered, feeling completely helpless. “It isn’t just her.” He turned as Todd shrugged.

  “No, you don’t. She has issues that have nothing to do with you. They’re hers, and I hate to be a dick about it, but if you get involved, you’ll never, ever get out of it. She needs professional help. I feel sorry that she’s having a hard time, but look what she’s put you through already. Corrina is trying to pressure you into a business relationship you don’t want. What’s next?” Todd raised his eyebrows, and Duncan blew out his breath. He knew Todd was right, but Corrina had once been a good friend, and his heart ached to see her like this.

  “I don’t know,” Duncan said softly. He slammed his hand down on the arm of his chair. “I’m so damned tired of feeling helpless.” He grew quiet as heads turned toward him. Duncan sighed grandly, turned his chair around, and went back into the private room without saying anything to anyone. He suddenly didn’t feel social at all and just wanted to go home.

  He returned to his place and stared at the plate that had been brought for him, no longer hungry. But Trevor and some others were watching him, and he didn’t need to make a scene. He picked up his fork and ate slowly.

  “Duncan… I…,” Todd said, but he only turned to grimace in his direction.

  Duncan wasn’t angry with Todd, not really. He was just plain angry and frustrated as all hell. Duncan plastered a smile on his face. He shook his head to tell Todd he didn’t want to talk about it, ate most of his dinner, and made it through the rest of the evening.

  “Do you want to talk now?” Todd asked once they were in the car.

  “About what? There’s nothing you can do to change anything, and talking isn’t going to help.” Duncan sighed. “I feel so damned helpless most of the time. My therapist suggested I try to take charge of my life, but every time I try, something is there trying to block me. Tonight was supposed to be about the success of my first project, and Corrina shows up to harangue me because I decided not to work with her. Then she’s rubbing her belly and telling me this sob story. I wanted to help her, but I can’t.”

  “Is this really about Corrina?” Todd asked.

  “No. It’s about me.” Duncan gripped the armrest. “Sometimes I’m completely useless. I know you’re going to tell me that I’m not, and I love you for that, but it’s how I feel. Yes, I wanted to help Corrina, and I want to help Trevor and you, and I’d really like to help my mom instead of being a burden to her.” He clenched his hands to fists and bounced them in his lap because there was nothing he could do with them anyway. Having something to punch would be fucking awesome right about now. “Where are we going?” he asked as they passed the turnoff into his subdivision.

  “I have an idea.” Todd grabbed the phone and
made a call. “Hey, dude, it’s Todd. Is it okay if we borrow the garage for an hour or so? Awesome. Thanks, I owe you one.” He hung up and hit the accelerator.

  Ten minutes later they pulled into the drive of a ranch house in Brown Deer. A huge man came out of the back, smiling as they pulled to a stop.

  Todd jumped out and shook hands with him, then pulled out Duncan’s chair and waited while he transferred himself. “Duncan, this is Bear. His real name is Rodney.”

  “Bear,” he said, extending his hand. Duncan shook it, and then Bear lifted the garage door and flipped on the lights. “It’s all yours. There are gloves in the box on the shelf. Just come get me when you’re done.” He half saluted and went back inside.

  “He’s a powerlifter now, but in college he boxed.” Todd pointed to the bag hanging from the garage rafters. “Come on.”

  “What are we doing?” Duncan asked as he followed.

  “We’re going to put some gloves on you, I’m going to hold the bag, and you’re going to punch it until you get all this frustration out. Just take it out on that.” Todd got some gloves, and Duncan put them on. “Have you done this before?”

  “In gym class, a lifetime ago.”

  “Then go for it.” Todd went behind the bag, holding it, and Duncan set the brakes on his chair.

  “I feel kind of dumb,” he said, staring up at the bag.

  Todd huffed. “Fine, pretend the bag is Corrina or her brother. You can’t hit them in real life, but you can whale on her in your head. Get the frustration out. Picture your mom, me, anyone who’s getting under your skin.”

  Duncan hit it a few times.

  “That’s all you got?”

  “No. I….” This wasn’t working. He didn’t feel angry any longer.

  “Bullshit. Remember being in the hospital and the doctor just told you that you’d never walk again? I bet you wanted to take a swing at him, punch his lights out.”

  Duncan punched the bag with each hand.

  “More. Let him have it.”

  Duncan hit it again, harder, as pent-up anger bubbled to the surface. “I hate that you move my chair.” He hit the bag six or seven times. “I’m an adult and I’ll make my own decisions.” He rapidly punched, seeing red. “And I fucking sure as hell want more than talking about going into business together.” He hit it again as Corrina took over his thoughts. “You only wanted me as a workhorse so you could have a free ride and be the center of attention.” He punched the bag again and again, letting out everything he’d held inside.

  Sweat beaded over his arms, back, and forehead as he continued punching. His hands grew sore, and he breathed deeply. He slowed his punches and then let his hands come to a rest on his lap. He lowered his eyes. Part of him was relieved, and another a little ashamed that he’d had to resort to something so basic and violent.

  “None of that.”

  Dammit. Sometimes he hated how observant Todd was.

  “Do you feel better?”

  “Yes.” At least the frustration was gone for the most part.

  “Then it helped.” Todd untied the gloves and tugged them off Duncan’s hands. Then he gently rubbed his fingers, warming his soreness away. “Just take it for what it is and don’t try to think about it too much. It was a way to get all that energy out so it could be replaced by something positive.”

  Duncan’s heart rate slowed and the cool night air caressed his damp skin. “I think I need a shower.”

  “Well, that I can’t help you with here.” Todd put the gloves away. “Why don’t you get back in the car, and I’ll close things up here and tell Bear that we’re leaving.”

  “Okay.” Duncan was more wrung out than he wanted to admit. He returned to the car and got into the passenger seat with a sigh. God, he really was out of shape, but he felt better. The exertion had worked the kinks out even as it cleared his mind and allowed him to think.

  Todd put his chair in the back seat and got in the car once the garage was closed up, then took him home.

  The house was dark when they pulled into the drive. His mother clearly wasn’t home, which surprised him. Not that he minded. Duncan checked his messages and found one he’d missed. She was apparently out with some women from church.

  “Do you want to come in?” Duncan offered.

  “Of course.” Todd smiled, and they went through the routine of getting him into the chair and inside.

  “I need to shower. If you want to watch television, I’ll be as quick as I can.” Duncan grabbed some fresh clothes and rolled across the hall to the bathroom. He got undressed and used the bars to move onto the shower seat. He turned on the water and began soaping himself up so he could get cleaned up as quickly as possible and back out to Todd.

  “Sweetheart,” Todd said, sticking his head around the door. “Want some company?”

  Duncan stilled. Bathing was one of those times when he was completely vulnerable and at his weakest. The soap and water made things slippery, and he was a little clumsy in the tub. For the longest time, he’d needed skilled help to bathe, which had left him feeling self-conscious. He swallowed his fear. “You can, but there’s nothing sexy about it.”

  The door closed, and then Todd stepped in behind him. He took the soap and ran his hands over Duncan’s chest and back. “You were saying that this wasn’t sexy.”

  When Todd pressed to Duncan’s back, Duncan leaned slightly into the touch. It was nice, and he groaned as Todd washed down his belly. “Okay, I’ve changed my mind.” He chuckled as Todd teased and tickled him slightly. “You’re supposed to be washing me, not sexing me up.”

  “Can’t I do both?” Todd knelt behind him, wrapping his arms around Duncan’s chest, holding him close, water beating over him.

  Duncan closed his eyes, letting the closeness wash over him. Sex with Todd was amazingly mind-blowing, but this was intimate and special. He had never thought bathing together, just touching and holding, could be as intimate and bonding as sex.

  “You can do whatever you want.” Duncan groaned softly as Todd washed his hair, rubbing his scalp and then rinsing him off, water sluicing over him. God, that was awesome, and he wanted this to last forever, but the water grew cold and Duncan shivered. Todd turned it off and got out of the tub, then held up one of the bath sheets and wrapped it around Duncan to keep him warm.

  “Let me help you,” Todd said gently, and Duncan easily got back into his chair, nearly completely wrapped in the bath sheet like a mummy. Todd dried himself and dressed quickly. “I’ll let you finish drying off and get dressed. Your mom left some popcorn on the counter, so I’ll stick that in the microwave, and we can watch a movie until she comes home.” Todd winked. The two of them had a history of watching movies that they never really watched, as necking and petting became more important than whatever antics were on the screen.

  “I’ll be right out.” Duncan closed the door and finished drying himself off, squirming to get out of the wrappings Todd had him in. It took him a few minutes, but then he got dressed and met Todd in the living room.

  Things were good now. He felt it, and damn it all, Duncan was happy. Maybe things in his life were starting to come together.

  TODD GRINNED as he saw his commercial playing on the television in the customer waiting room at work. It had been running for two weeks, and Trevor had reported that business was increasing day by day. Word had gotten around that the guy in the ad was also a mechanic, and a lot of customers asked for him to work on their cars. Some people came in just to see him. It was a little strange being sort-of famous.

  “Hey, Todd, there’s a phone call for you,” Brent called from the office as he was getting ready to start his next job. “They’re saying it’s important.”

  Todd went inside and picked up the line that was indicated. “May I help you?”

  “Yes. This is Eileen from the Bobsled and Skeleton Federation. You are the Todd Hamilton who’s in the commercials for Michaelson’s Service?”

  “Yes. I’m featured in th
em.” Todd was instantly on guard. “But we did them based upon the federation and USOC rules. There are no logos, and I never mentioned the Olympics or anything like that.”

  “That’s true, and that part of the commercials we have no problem with. But in viewing them, we are curious where you received the video that was shot of your runs?”

  “Those were taken by a friend of mine during some of my practice runs. We have a signed release from him, giving us permission to use it.”

  “That’s the problem. That film was taken while you were using federation property. And you do not have the federation’s permission to use the footage. We are in the process of contacting Michaelson’s Service to have the commercials pulled and will be sending a cease and desist order for them.” She sounded as though she were telling him he’d won the lottery. “The purpose of this call was to verify the source of the footage.”

  “You can’t do that,” Todd said. “You don’t own the footage, and we are allowed to take it. Besides, the person taking the film has given permission to use it. And you have no jurisdiction over them. You can make all the rules you want, but they aren’t under your nonprofit organization.” He kept his voice reasonable.

  “We allow video at our facilities for training purposes only. Not commercial use,” she continued, undeterred. “I’m sorry, but the footage must no longer be used. We will be in contact with Michaelson’s Service.”

  “So will I.”

  “And, Mr. Hamilton, they may not be under the umbrella of our organization, but you certainly are. You do realize that you can be removed from the federation, have your benefits canceled, and have access to all of the federation’s training facilities denied to you.” She said that in the sweetest voice, with an edge that could cleave steel.

  She ended the call, and Todd stared at the phone, feeling the blood rush out of his head.

  “What is it?” Brent asked as Todd swayed on his feet.

  “I need to talk to Trevor right away.” He sucked air and called his cell, getting voicemail. He left a message.