Kelly looks a bit skeptical. “Okay, I guess. But remember that Spencer set up that meeting with the other investors for 8:30 in the morning and you need to have the waistband of your suit adjusted by then.”
Jackson looks slightly annoyed. “Don’t worry about it. Hailey and I won’t be long.”
His words jolt my system. An impending disaster is headed my way. I can feel it.
“Okay. I’ll be at the coffee shop downstairs. Let me know when you’re ready,” Kelly says as she grabs her smartphone and heads towards the door. She leans into my ear on her way out. “I’m gonna go work on the menu for my upcoming engagement party…don’t tell my boss!” She laughs giddily and winks at me before she disappears into the elevator.
Now, Jackson and I are standing here in the vestibule. Alone. Face to face. My body tells me to reach out and grab him. To let my lips conquer his. But my instincts tell me to hold back – something isn’t right.
“Come in,” Jackson says coldly as he leads the way into the living room. I follow quietly and wait for him to speak. I don’t want to throw all my cards on the table without knowing what’s on his mind.
He walks over to the mantle and pours himself a drink. I watch his broad shoulders as he tosses back the amber liquid in one shot. It’s odd seeing him in a business suit, but he looks so good. “You want something to drink?” he asks tipping the bottle of whiskey in my direction without even looking at me.
“No thanks,” I say in a small voice. Even if I weren’t pregnant, I would refuse. I’m not a whiskey-drinking girl.
Jackson moves to the massive floor-to-ceiling window overlooking Greenwich Village. He stands there with his shoulders square, his hair perfectly-combed, wearing that tailored gray $5000 business suit.
In that moment, I realize that Jackson has become exactly the type of man I came to New York City in search of. Urbane, refined, successful. But still, I would quickly trade in this cold distant stranger in front of me for the warm, caring Texan that I fell in love with.
Finally, he speaks. “I met Spencer’s wife today – Amber. The moment I saw her, I realized that she looked familiar. And then it struck me. I’d seen her before. In pictures. At your apartment.” I feel my stomach roil nervously. “Hailey – weren’t you ever gonna tell me that Spencer’s wife is one of your best friends? That you pulled strings to get me that meeting with Spencer? That the only reason my app -- my life’s work – is successful is because you called in a favor from your friend’s rich husband?”
“Jackson – it’s not fair to say that. Your app is amazing. Spencer wouldn’t have invested if it wasn’t. I was only trying to help you share it with the world,” I say defensively.
“I specifically told you that I didn’t need your help. I wanted to be successful on my own merits. Not because my girlfriend was in the background pulling strings.” His face is red. His fists are balled up by his sides.
“But, Jackson –” I try to protest.
“Save it, Hailey,” he snaps. “I can’t trust a word out of your deceitful mouth.”
My eyes are burning. My chest is tight. My hands instinctively reach for my stomach to protect my child against his father’s hurtful words. “I didn’t come here to be treated like this,” I say quietly as I turn towards the door.
I wholeheartedly wish that Jackson would try to stop me as I leave.
He doesn’t.
And my heart explodes and shatters like glass.
Chapter 9
“You really need to eat,” Kimberly says nodding towards the bowl of vegetable soup sitting on my bedside table. “The baby needs the nutrition.”
“It’s cold,” I whine, turning up my nose. I pull the warm blankets up around my body and snuggle into my pillow.
She puts the basket of folded laundry at the foot of the bed and eyes me with a pout. “Hailey, if you had eaten it when I brought it to you an hour ago, it wouldn’t have gotten cold. I’m going to reheat it and you’re going to eat it. No complaints.” She grabs the bowl and stomps off to the kitchen.
When I finally built the strength to call Kimberly and tell her the story, she got on the first flight to New York City even though I told her she didn’t have to.
But she’s my sister and she insisted.
Now, she’s here with that motherly way of hers, taking care of my every need. She’s biting her tongue. She had warned me I would fall pregnant but I ignored her. She knows I don’t need to be scolded right now. She’s a single mom. I am about to become one. She knows I just need her companionship.
I look over Baby Billy sleeping in the middle of my bed. He looks so beautiful and peaceful sucking on his fingers. I imagine my own baby and what it would be like to be his mother, to take care of him everyday and to see him smile into my face.
It can’t be that hard – loving someone so beautiful and innocent.
I try to convince myself. “I can do this,” I murmur as I lightly stroke Billy’s head.
Even without Jackson in the picture, I can do this.
Chapter 10
“Hailey – my office. Now.” I don’t even have to look up at Matt to know that he’s pissed off. About something.
I don’t have the energy for this today. I really don’t. I’m nauseous and exhausted and heartbroken. And I don’t have the energy to be his emotional punching bag.
I follow Matt into his office and close the door behind me. The smell of his cologne fills the air. The fragrance that used to turn me on now makes me plain out nauseous. I find myself consciously holding my breath.
“Hailey, take a seat,” Matt says condescendingly.
Despite my urge to protest, I do as I’m told. It is true that I have a sordid history with Matt, but I can’t let myself forget that I am a lowly intern at his family law firm. I’m replaceable.
“Hailey, do you know what this is?” He asks shoving a single sheet of letter-sized paper in my direction.
I take the paper from his hand and glance at it. “This is the email I sent to Charles Dubois concerning the injunction proceedings on the property he’s looking to sell in Tribeca. You asked me to send it.”
“Hailey, do you think that spellcheck is optional? Do you think that Mr. Webster was making mere suggestions when he created his dictionary?” Matt speaks in a pompous tone.
I stare at the paper, confused. “No, of course not,” I say as I read the e-mail once again.
“Are you sure? Because you appear to believe that the basic rules of the English language do not apply to your work.” He carries on his rant.
“I double-check all my w—“ Shit! I forgot an ‘e’ in ‘proceedings’. “Crap!” I mutter under my breath.
“Crap is right, Hailey,” Matt yells, slamming his fist into his desk. “Your work has been crap lately.”
The first tear runs down my face.
Shit!
Now I’m crying.
“Your work used to be decent. Now, it’s just crap. Do you know how many law students would kill for the opportunity to intern at Cartwright Moretti Stevenson? You just take this opportunity for granted and continue to produce bullshit work!”
He’s irate, spewing venom at me as he paces the floor. The tears run liberally down my face.
“What the fuck is wrong with you?” he growls.
“I’m pregnant!” The words tumble out of my mouth.
Matt freezes. “What?”
“I’m pregnant!” I yell.
The look on his face is one of pure terror. I have to laugh. “It’s not your baby, idiot.”
He exhales audibly. He walks slowly to his desk, grasping at the lip of it for stability. He sinks into his seat. “Amelia is still threatening to take my kid to the other side of the country…My daughter loves me. She needs me.”
He says it as if it’s supposed to excuse his abusive behavior. He’s waiting for sympathy from me. I don’t have any.
Personal problems or not, Matt has no right to treat me the way he does. I’m sick of bein
g bullied by him. Now is the time to stand up for myself. I don’t care how much influence he has at this law firm.
“I won’t be working with you anymore,” I say calmly as I rise to my feet. “Please have me re-assigned to a lawyer in the firm’s tech startup division. I’m done with your harassment.”
“But we’re in the middle of the new DuBois Realties deal,” Matt protests.
I look him dead in the eye. “Have me re-assigned to the tech startup division.”
He doesn’t say a word. He just nods slightly.
With that, I turn on my heel and walk out the door.
Chapter 11
Ruthie and I watch as Amber gently lays Baby Aiden in his bassinet, his nanny standing watch nearby. We had witnessed him go from crying hysterically to sleeping peacefully in about thirty seconds. All it took was a bit of cuddling and the calming sound of his mother’s voice.
“You’re so good with him,” Ruthie remarks as we tiptoe out of the nursery.
Amber offers an exhausted frown. “It doesn’t feel like that when he’s up, screaming at three in the morning. If I didn’t have Spencer and the nanny, I would be insane by now. This is hard work.”
And I believe her. She is the picture of misery – disheveled hair, bags under her eyes, robe stained with spit-up – she’s nothing like the Amber I’m used to.
I feel my stomach roil. If Amber complains about how difficult it is to care for a baby, even with a husband and hired help, do I even stand a chance on my own as a single mother, especially with law school and my internship.
Ruthie probably reads the anxiety on my face as we enter the living room. “Oh Hailey – don’t worry. Us girls – we’ll help you out. We’ve got your back.”
Amber looks skeptical as she drops into a comfortable leather reclining chair. “That’s all good and well, but I’m telling you, without Spencer’s companionship, I would have been a madwoman by now. Motherhood – make that, parenthood – is a round-the-clock job.”
“Amber, are you trying to scare her shitless?” Ruthie asks, sounding annoyed.
“No – I want her to be prepared for the reality of parenthood. It’s not all daisies and butterfly kisses. It’s hard. Spencer left for a business meeting two hours ago and already, I’m counting the minutes till he gets back. Hailey needs more than just a few girlfriends coming by to chitchat and drop off teddy bears for the baby every now and then. She needs full-time help. She needs a partner. She needs Jackson.”
Ugh – Jackson.
Just hearing his name sends me spiraling into anxiety.
I still haven’t told him that I’m pregnant and if I can have it my way, I’ll never have to. I don’t want to face the inevitable rejection I’ll experience when he learns I’m carrying his baby. He’s at the pinnacle of his success. The last thing he needs is a stroller-pushing, diaper-bag totting baby mama in the background.
Ruthie looks over at me from her seat on the couch next to me. “Hails – don’t listen to her. You’ll be fine, even if Jackson isn’t in the picture.”
“Don’t fill her head with pie-in-the sky fantasies. She needs to get Jackson on board now, because seven months from now, you’ll be in bed snuggled up against Michael’s warm body and she’ll be all alone in a one-bedroom hell-hole rocking a colicky baby at four in the morning with nipples sore from breastfeeding, wondering where the hell she’s getting rent money from because she spent her last $20 on diapers.” Amber’s face is red and her eyebrows hiked up on her forehead as she strains to get her point across.
“Amber – stop it!” Ruthie chides. “Hailey – don’t worry about money. I’ll talk to Michael and see what the firm can do in terms of paid maternity leave.”
Just then, the sound of Aiden’s cries fills the air again. Amber sighs as she pushes out of her seat. “Y’know what, Hails – Listen to Ruthie because I obviously don’t know what I’m talking about,” she says sarcastically. “Motherhood is a cakewalk.”
Chapter 12
Kimberly pops a pacifier into her screaming baby’s mouth as she fastens the straps, buckling Billy securely into his stroller. She then hoists her purse and the baby’s diaper bag onto her shoulder, grabs the handle of her over-sized suitcase and attempts to manoeuver it all through the thick crowd at LaGuardia airport.
“Kimmy, slow down,” I yelp, struggling to keep up with her.
She tosses a glance at me over her shoulder. “I’m ‘bout to miss my flight, girl. Have you seen the lineup at the American Airways counter!” In her haste, she runs smack into a middle-aged gentleman in a Hawaiian shirt and flip-flops. “Oh – I’m sorry, sir,” she apologizes sweetly without decreasing her pace.
“Slow down,” I urge, chasing behind her. “Let me help you with your bags. That’s why I’m here. Remember?”
She comes to a sudden stop and gives me a sheepish grin, brushing her honey-blond curls out of her face. “Oh, yeah. That’s right.” She hands me the handle of the suitcase. “Habit, I guess,” she says as she resumes her walk to the ticket counter, now at a more reasonable pace. “When you’re a single mom, you get used to doing everything yourself.”
Kimberly and Billy’s father, Will, were high school sweethearts. When he moved away for college on a football scholarship, he asked Kimberly to wait for him. He promised that he’d come back and marry her. She was loyal to him for years, even when he got drafted by a team in the semi-professional football league and the cheating rumors started making their way home. By the time Will made it back to Austin, it was with a pregnant cheerleader he had married on a shotgun trip to Las Vegas weeks earlier. Kimberly was devastated. But a few months later when Will came crawling back to her under the pretense that he had made a mistake by marrying his vapid, Barbie doll wife, Kimberly let him back into her bed. And just as quickly, Will announced that he and his wife were seeking the spiritual guidance of their pastor to repair their marriage. To this day, Kimberly says that sleeping with Will is the ‘smartest’ mistake she’s ever made because it gave her Baby Billy and her son is the greatest joy of her life.
I roll the suitcase into the slow-moving line and stand next to Kimberly who is now bent over, slipping mittens onto her baby’s tiny hands. “Is it hard being a single mom?”
She glances up at me, her eyebrows all scrunched up.
“Amber – my friend, Amber, says that being a mom is hard, but being a single mom is even harder.”
Kimberly stands and adjusts the waistband of her jeans. “Well, yeah – being a single mom is the hardest thing ever. You’re drained everyday. Exhausted everyday…but then, your baby gives you that toothless smile or he says ‘mama’ for the first time and it fuels you back up. It gives you the energy to keep going another day. Hailey – I won’t lie to you – being a mother is hard and you’re making your life even harder by refusing to include your child’s father in his life. You know my circumstances. You know why Will isn’t present in Billy’s life. I wouldn’t wish single mamahood on anyone. But it can be done. It is possible. And I know that you will be an amazing mother to your baby…whether Jackson is around or not.”
Chapter 13
“Did you find a new roommate yet?
I throw a glance at Nadia over my shoulder. “No – I haven’t even started looking yet.”
Nadia offered to accompany me to my eight-week ultrasound appointment. We’re a bit early so we’re killing time at the bookstore across the street from my doctor’s office.
“Why not?” she asks as she runs a finger along the spines of the books lined up on the bookshelf in front of her.
I sigh. “I really doubt that I’ll find someone willing to bunk with a pregnant girl. In seven months, there’ll be a baby around…all the time.” I pick out a fashion magazine and quickly flip through the pages before placing it back on the shelf.
“True – I didn’t even consider that…” Nadia twists her lips, giving me a sympathetic smile. She turns back to the books but seems to be staring straight through them. She’s si
lent for a while. Then, she asks, “Are you scared? You haven’t graduated yet, you’re away from home and you’re having a baby – are you scared?”
I turn and look her straight in the face. “I’m petrified,” I admit in a small voice.
She gives me a sympathetic smile. “What’s gonna happen? What are you gonna do?” she asks in a tentative tone.
Moments with Hailey - The Esquire Girls Series - Hailey's Story (Books 1, 2, 3 & 4) - Box Set (featuring Tender Moments , a brand-new Valentine's Day novelette) Page 14