by J. G. Kemp
Everyone else was happy too. I think it was because my dad promised to give everyone “boat-loads of money”.
My Uncle Blurt came to the party, and so did all my other aunts and uncles and cousins. I hadn’t seen most of them since my grandpa’s funeral. Aunt Tired and Uncle Loud and my cousin, Shrugs, came.
Shrugs was in high school and wore black clothes with metal studs all over them. He always talked about tattoos and what kind of tattoos he was going to get. For some reason he wanted a tattoo of a frowning, crying cloud.
My Aunt Peppy and Uncle Still and my cousin, Grape, came too. Grape was four years old and reminded me of Olive and Hazel. She came with a stack of coloring books and went straight to the corner and started coloring. Uncle Still went straight to the couch and sat there. I could never tell if he was sleeping with his eyes open, or just really calm.
There were lots of other people at the party that I didn’t know. Mostly my dad’s old friends from before I was born.
Spencer couldn’t come because he had to go to dinner with his family - it was his sister’s birthday.
Towards the end the party, I noticed something strange. I noticed Grape standing by the front door, with a big stack of colorful books, and she was handing them to people as they left.
At first I thought she was giving away her coloring books, but then I saw her run to my bedroom, and bring out even more books.
They didn’t look like any books from my room. I watched her hand them out and then followed her as she went back into my room again.
My desk was covered in books! Colorful books - piled as high as the ceiling. And then I realized what had happened. Grape had found the quantum coloring book! And she was coloring in it! And she was making more of them!
“Grape!” I shouted. “What are you doing?! You can’t—”
“I didn’t like the black cover,” Grape said. “So I made them with green covers, and blue covers, and red covers, and orange covers, and—”
“No, Grape, NO!” I grabbed the quantum coloring book from her hand. It was filled with rectangular holes! She must have drawn dozens of books. “Grape! What have you done!? Have you been giving these away!?”

“Oh yes,” she said with a big smile. “Everybody loves them. Everybody loves it when I color! Especially my mommy!”
“Oh NO!” I ran back to the party. There weren’t many people left. How many books had Grape given away? This was bad. This was very bad!
Knock Knock Knock. There was a knock on the front door. My dad opened it. It was a police man. “Hello, sir. We’re here to investigate a fake lottery ticket,” he said.
Chapter 9
robot rampage
I ran back to my room, sent Grape away, and locked the door. “Okay. What to do? What to do? I can fix this. I HAVE to fix this! I have to track down those books. Fake lottery ticket? This is bad. This is very very bad.”
I didn’t know who had books, or how many there were. What if they had already colored in them? What if they all figured it out? What if they all had the power? This was more dangerous than the Bigfoots. I had to destroy those books!
And then I remembered the house-cleaning robots. Maybe I could make a paper-shredding robot. Yes, that was it, a robot that could leave my house, and track down all the coloring books, and shred them. It was the only way.
There was no time to waste. I drew a robot with hands and a mouth that was a paper shredder. I gave it wheels, and rocket engines, and even better, I made it invisible. Well, nearly invisible. I colored it white and it came out of the book a sort of white-ish clear color.
As I colored, I thought, “this robot will grow to be… as big as me, and will seek out and shred all the quantum coloring books, and it will be invisible, and it will come back here when all the books are destroyed, and turn back into a drawing.” That should do it.
“buzzzzzzzzzz” As soon as it was made I could faintly hear its paper-shredding mouth. It wasn’t silent, but it was quiet enough. And I could see it, but I couldn’t. It was so strange.
“Destroy all the books,” I ordered.
The robot started eating the stack of colorful books on my desk.
“buzzzzzzzz buzzzzzzzz buzzzzzzzzz”
They disappeared, one after another, and then I saw the imprints of the robot wheels on the carpet, and then they moved across my room. They moved to my window. My window opened, and then closed again. The robot was gone.
I waited in my room a long time. All the guests left. Everyone else went to sleep. I wasn’t going to sleep. What if something terrible happened? What if Uncle Blurt was drawing ducks, or moose, or giant fish in the book? What if Cousin Shrugs was coloring sad-looking clouds, or guitars, or even worse, frowning faces?
And then I heard a sound.
It was coming from my closet. I opened the door and saw, floating in mid-air, one of the quantum coloring books that I had hidden. Half of it was gone. It was disappearing into thin air.
“buzzzzzzzzzz” The sound was coming from it. The robot was shredding it. The nearly-invisible robot was putting it into its paper-shredding mouth. The robot was going to shred MY quantum coloring books!
Oh no! I didn’t mean that! I couldn’t let THAT happen! I grabbed a hold of the robot and started shaking it. It didn’t stop. “I command you to STOP!” I said. It didn’t stop.
It finished shredding the first book in the closet and moved onto the others.
There were still two books under my bed and two in my desk drawers and three in my backpack. And the original book. How would it be able to destroy that book and become a drawing again?
zippppp I heard a zipper. My backpack was opening. The quantum coloring books floated out and were shredded in an instant.
“buzzzzzzzz buzzzzzzzz buzzzzzzzzzz”
It was just like Chippers eating bacon. I tried to push the robot over. I tried to hold him back from the books under my bed, but it was no use. The robot was powerful. I needed something to defeat it!
I ran to my desk and drew a robot with big crushing hands like hammers and started coloring it as fast as I could.
“buzzzzzzzzzz buzzzzzzzzzz”
The robot ate the books under my bed. It came to my desk. It opened the drawers and ate both books inside.
“buzzzzzzzzzz buzzzzzzzzzz”
Grabbing the last book, I jumped over my bed and crouched in the corner with my back to the robot. I colored as fast as I could. The paper-shredder was crawling over me. Its metal fingers dug into my back. The sound of its paper-shredder mouth was right in my ears.
“buzzzzzzzzzz”
I didn’t finish coloring. I wasn’t strong enough to hold the book back. The robot pulled it away. The last quantum coloring book, and MY FINGERS, went into the robot’s mouth! And then the robot vanished…
Chapter 10
the book buried
There was blood everywhere! My blood! My fingers were gone!
I felt faint. So faint. And then the strangest thing happened to me. The strangest thing that has ever happened to me.
I must have blacked out and had a dream because I thought I saw myself. I thought I saw myself crawling through my bedroom window. And then I woke up, and I was healed!
My fingers were fine! All the blood was gone! I don’t know what happened. Everything was better!
And then I saw it. On my desk. A brand new copy of the quantum coloring book. The words on the front were glowing brighter than ever. I opened it. There were already two funny shaped holes on the first page.
“That’s strange,” I thought. And then I realized what it was. It had been a drawing of my fingers! Someone had drawn my fingers in the coloring book!

I couldn’t believe it. Just moments ago my fingers had been shredded. The quantum coloring book had been destroyed. Yet, now everything was fine. My fingers worked. The book was back!
Knock knock knock. Th
ere was a knock on my bedroom door.
“Brandon.” It was my dad. “Time to wake up, Big Buddy. We gotta go.”
I sat there in my room. It was morning already? I was completely confused. What was happening? Things were getting strange. Too strange. The quantum coloring book was too much trouble. It wasn’t worth it. I had to get rid of it.
“Brandon?” my dad called again.
It was Saturday. One Saturday every month we went to the cemetery where my grandpa was buried. We always left before breakfast.
“Coming, Dad,” I called back. I looked at my fingers again. I wiggled them. Did that really just happen?
We rode to the cemetery in my dad’s old car. He had to return the sports car, he said. He wasn’t going to get any lottery money after all. In fact, he said he might be in trouble with the law. I felt sick to my stomach.
At the cemetery, over my grandpa’s grave, my mom and dad said things like, “He’s not really gone.” I didn’t like it. I didn’t like going to the cemetery. I just wanted to go home. I wanted to talk to Spencer. I needed to tell him what had happened. And I had to do something about the book.
On the way home we stopped at a fancy restaurant for breakfast. My dad said, “get anything you want, Big Buddy, anything at all.” I ordered french toast but it wasn’t as good as Ms. Violet’s.
Later that day I told Spencer everything - about Chippers, and the robot, and my fingers. He agreed that the book was too dangerous, and that we had to get rid of it.
I didn’t risk rebuilding Smudge Street. I didn’t want something terrible to happen. Too many things had gone wrong.
So, we decided to bury the book in the hole in Spencer’s yard. We would never really dig a tunnel under the alley, I told him.
As Spencer dropped the last shovel-full of dirt in the hole, the book was buried. It was four feet underground. The construction crews could fix Ms. Violet’s house. Everything could just go back to normal. But then, out of the bushes in Spencer’s backyard, walked Chippers!

He was dirty and limping. He was injured. Spencer and I looked at each other in surprise. This wasn’t the Chippers I had drawn. It was the old Chippers, the real Chippers…
* * *
That was almost three months ago. Three months. And you might think what I just told you was impossible - that none of that ever happened - about my fingers, and the new book that appeared from nowhere.
Well, if you didn’t believe that story, then there is no chance you will believe what happened next. Let me tell you…
Brandon Black’s story continues in…
the Quantum
Coloring Book
episode 4: travels in time!
Prologue - Episode 4
total ruin
Hey. My name is Brandon. Brandon Black. And I have to do this. I can’t wait much longer. I have to go back in time and destroy the quantum coloring book. It’s the only way. It’s the only way to bring back Grayville. It’s the only way to bring back my best friend, and my family. It’s the only way to bring back EVERYTHING.
I have to go back in time and make sure I NEVER FIND this book.
Because if you haven’t realized it yet, this book causes nothing but disaster. And if I never find it, then everything will be okay. Everything can go back to normal.
But before I leave, let me tell you how my entire life spiraled down into total ruin. Let me tell you how I made the black hole. And then I have to save the world.
My name is Brandon Black, and this is my story…
episode 4: travels in time
Chapter 1
new dog old dog
“Yip Yip Yip." It was Chippers. The old Chippers. And he had just walked out of the bushes in Spencer’s yard.
“Come here boy, come here Chippers,” called Spencer. The old Chippers limped over and licked Spencer’s hand. “Um, this isn’t good,” he said and looked at me.
I stared at Spencer and Chippers in disbelief. How did this happen? “No, this isn’t good,” I said. “This is bad! This is terrible. This is—”
“Yip Yip Yip.” Chippers limped over to me and started licking my hand. I pulled it away. I stood up and started pacing. I was mad. Why? Why was this happening?
“Well, it’s not terrible,” said Spencer. “Not as bad the giants, at least. It could be worse. Look on the bright side, now we—”
But I didn’t let him finish. I’d had enough. “Arrr!” I kicked the dirt we had piled on top of the coloring book. Why did Spencer have to argue with me? Why did he have to be such an optimist?!
“What do you mean, ‘the bright side’? There is no bright side! It’s all terrible. Two dogs?! What are we going to do? The book is four feet underground. It took us a year to dig that hole. We can’t let Ms. Violet see two Chippers! How are we going to fix this? How? What can we do besides just ‘looking on the bright side’? ARRR!” I kicked Spencer’s tree fort and then slumped to the ground.
“Yip Yip Yip!”
I glared at Chippers. I was so mad at that book. So mad at myself.
“Well…” Spencer said calmly. “I dunno what to do yet. Let’s just think about this a minute.”
I looked away, out at Smudge Street. I stared at the rubble of Ms. Violet’s house.
Slurp Slurp Slurp. The old Chippers licked his paw beside Spencer.
“I don’t think he’s hurt too bad,” said Spencer after awhile. “It looks like he has something in his foot. A splinter maybe. Poor little guy.” Spencer rubbed Chippers behind the ears. “He’s pretty dirty. I wonder where he’s been this whole time.”
I sighed. I wasn’t mad anymore. Just… tired. Tired of problems. “I give up,” I said. “I don’t know what to do.”
“Well,” Spencer began. “Tell you what…” He held Chippers tightly and yanked something out of his front paw.
“YIP YIP!” Chippers barked and then whined and licked his paw again.
Spencer held the splinter up and smiled proudly. “I’ll keep Chippers here tonight, in the fort. I’ll give him food and water, and a bath. No one will see him. We can decide what to do tomorrow, after we have time to think about it.”
I nodded. “Yeah. That sounds okay. Thanks.”

“Sure, Brandon. We’ll think of something.”
“Well. I better go,” I said. It was getting late anyway. “See ya tomorrow.”
“See ya tomorrow,” Spencer said.
As I walked home, I was glad I had Spencer as a best friend. He liked me even when I was mad.
Back at my house, the new Chippers greeted me at the door. “Yip Yip Yip.” He jumped up on my leg and licked my hand. My whole family was there, standing in the kitchen. It smelled like popcorn.
“Oh good, Brandon, you’re just in time,” said my mom. “We’re about to play a board game. Would you join us? Ms. Violet is playing.”
“No thanks, Mom. I’m going to my room.”
As I walked through the kitchen I could tell everyone looked concerned. Anytime I didn’t want to have ‘family time’ my mom would look at my dad, and Hazel would look at my mom, and my dad would look at Hazel, and they all looked worried, as if something was wrong with me. I hated it.
I went straight to my room. I had to figure out how to fix this dog problem.
And I just wanted to be alone.
Chapter 2
the book returns
That night the book came back to me.
I was sitting at my desk when I saw it: a tiny piece of paper on the floor - and then another, and another. They were scattered everywhere - all over my desk, in my closet, under my bed, in my backpack. They looked like snow flakes, or a big pieces of dust, and it took me a minute to realize what they were.
Remember the paper-shredding robot? Well, it shredded the books alright, but it left something behind - shreds! Not all the shreds, but enough. One shred would have been enough.
�
��
I know I promised I wouldn’t, but that was before there were two Chippers.
And I wasn’t happy about it. I wasn’t excited. But I touched a black colored pencil to one of the snowflake-sized shreds and thought, “this is going to grow to be a new quantum coloring book.”
And when the book appeared, brand new, re-made, complete, I glared at it. The words were glowing. I remembered all the disasters that had happened: the thing with fangs, the Bigfoots, the cows, the lottery ticket, the robot…