- As far as I know, you are no longer married. - Antônio spoke looking at Amanda very tenderly. Quickly, she sought comfort in her friend.
- I'm glad you've come for me Antônio. - She said walking towards him.
- Who is he? – asked Breno. - What do you want with my wife? - Now he asked Antônio directly who looked at the man in front of him from top to bottom. He had seen Breno just a few times and in none of them had they been so close as now. The man showed from his expression to be a coward dressed with designer’s clothes and with no character whatsoever.
- This is Antônio, the person with whom I have a date today. - Amanda spoke confirming what she had said earlier, and Breno looked at her in awe. He did not seem happy about that.
- I do not know if she told you my friend, but you are about to go out with a married woman. Doesn’t it bother you a little? - Breno spoke inciting Antônio and Amanda wanted to disbelieve his words. But she preferred to remain silent. Antônio knew only too well the truth about her life, he needed no explanation.
- I am only interested in what she told me, nothing more. - Antônio replied drily.
- What is the degree of your relationship? - Breno asked looking straight at Amanda.
- This is of no concern to you Breno. - She replied sharply. - My relationship with you is restricted to commenting Lucas’s life, nothing more.
- You do not look like a couple. The atmosphere is kind of cool here. - He said mocking as he had done in recent days.
- Not all people have a dirty mind like yours Breno. Have a good day! When you want news from your son come to me; otherwise, I’d appreciate it if you did not. - She spoke feeling more self-assured.
Right! I’ll talk to you again later dear. - Breno finished speaking and went by Antônio looking at him briefly and left.
- Is everything all right with you? - Antônio asked, worried.
- Yes, I am fine. - She replied, but he realized her weakness and wrapped her around his arms. - He will ask for Lucas’s custody. - She said in distress. Her eyes were covered with tears that were about to pour down.
- What a bastard! How can anyone be so unscrupulous? Use a child to make the mother be with him. - At this time, Antônio remembered the offer he’d made. He should insist more for the sake of Amanda. - Accept my proposal Amanda, marry me. - He insisted stroking the hair that delighted him so.
- He knows he has chances of getting custody. - She said with tears rolling down her cheeks causing immense pain to Antônio.
- I know my dear. - Antônio spoke pulling her to his chest in order to lessen her pain. - He knows of the immense love you have for Lucas and is using that to make you vulnerable and so convince you to go back to him.
- I do not want to live it all over again. - Amanda said leaning against his shoulder. She was tired of the situation that seemed endless.
- Then marry me. - Antônio spoke bending a little away from her body. The proximity was driving him out of his mind and Amanda did not need such an attitude from him at that time. - When you want to undo the marriage, we will arrange that. Regarding sex I would never ask you something that you would not be willing to give. - She heard in shame just to imagine such a thing. The possibility of having a sexual relationship with him seemed distant but the spoken word gave her a thrill.
- I know you would not do that, but I'm afraid that our friendship might be shaken. - Amanda explained.
- You will not lose my friendship and I'm pretty strong to know what is best for me, do not worry about me. - Antônio seemed self-confident.
- I do not believe it can be as easy as you make it sound Antônio. - She doubted, mourning.
- It does not hurt to try, does it? - He asked.
- All right. I promise I'll think about it, but still do not believe it is the best option, although I have no other. - Her time was closing in and she would have to decide what to do sooner or later. At that moment she just wanted some peace and nothing else.
- In the evening we’ll talk some more about this. - He finished. - Now let’s go and I’ll drop you home.
Chapter II
- Hello my love. Are you ok? - asked Amanda when she heard her son's voice.
- I'm fine, Mom - he answered with his child's voice. - I did not call you earlier because grandpa took me to see a colt that had just been born. It is very beautiful Mom. - Her son had great chances of being a veterinarian; he really did love animals. Amanda smiled as she remembered the time when they found a stray starving and sick. The child did not leave her alone until they took the little fellow to the vet and left it there to be taken care of and then adopted. If they lived in a house she knew she'd be have lots of cats, dogs, parrots and all he wanted to take care of.
- OK, my love. - She was more excited than usual talking to her son. Maybe it was the latest events. - How are the holidays? she wanted to know.
- I'm really having fun. - Amanda heard knowing he would tell her all the details of the farm and was happy to have more time with her son. The excited child described everything in detail and only stopped when his grandmother said she wanted to talk to his mother.
- My grandmother wants to talk to you, mother – he said after narrating his story.
- My darling, take care yeah, big kiss. - Amanda said goodbye to her son, as he handed over the phone to his grandmother and went chasing more adventures to tell her at their next phone call.
- How are you my daughter? - Her mother asked when she picked up the handset.
- A little tired mother, but I’m okay – she said trying to keep her voice natural.
- Is there a problem child? - Rebeca wanted to know, realizing that there was something wrong with her daughter.
- That sixth sense that mothers have is really incomprehensible. - Amanda smiled embarrassed. - It’s Breno, mother. He's been here for two weeks now and I haven’t told you because I did not wish to worry you. - there was a brief pause.
- You do not intend to go back living with him, right, my daughter? - Rebeca asked worriedly. - After all you've been through, seeing him in search for adventures and leaving you with no means. That man does not deserve women like you - completed the lady.
- Do not worry Mom; I do not intend to be with him again. - Amanda was sure of what she said; she would not change her position. She was not alone, helpless, as she had been when Breno left. There were people at her side helping her move on. Smiling, she remembered Antônio, her guardian angel. A unique friend who, thanks to Breno’s indifference, appeared in her and Lucas’s life bringing new colors to them.
- Amanda, why don’t you go out with other men? - asked her mother to her surprise.
- I do not feel prepared to start again, mother. Moreover, I'm always busy and when I have some time off I prefer to use it on my son. - She defended herself.
- I know your life is hectic my dear, but a new relationship would do you good and, of course, would remove that guy from your life once and for all. The fact that he sees you like that, alone, quiet, with no interest toward anyone else can lead him to believe that you still love him and want reconciliation. - Her mother thought like Antônio; this coincidence could be telling her something.
- I do not love him anymore, you know that. - Amanda said it as if she knew what she was talking about.
- Then make it clear to him. I'm sure you have treated him well when he comes for you and that for a jerk is a green light to follow towards winning you over. Change your life. Make career plans, yes, but also think about your heart. Your emotional life. - Mothers’ advices are always loaded with unique truth.
- You're right. I will think about it - said Amanda realizing that now was the time. “If it had to be that way, then it would be," she thought.
- Do it baby. Life cannot stop because a relationship did not work out and excuses will not help at all, understand? - "Her mother was a master at giving advice, and she was right," thought Amanda. - I will have to go now, there are two hungry ones here asking for food. Take c
are my daughter and do think about what we said. - ended the mother.
- I said I'll think about it mother. A big kiss. - it was all set. She would marry Antônio. Fate seemed to have given him that chance, so she’d take it to get rid of the father of her child. Other than that, time would be in charge of putting things in their places. At least, she hoped so.
Amanda took advantage of the late afternoon to prepare dinner. She had hardly left the house lately. She was definitely, as her assistant would say, rusty and out of place in the world. Thanks to her shop she always had formal and fashionable clothes. If she did not own a boutique, certainly her wardrobe would be just like her: outdated.
After getting dressed and putting on some makeup, Amanda was ready. A casual, flimsy, dress was her choice. The weather was warm, which led her to dress lightly. Looking at the mirror she liked what she saw. Her face was more expressive and bright, although a large part of it was artificial. Her body seemed more straight and elegant with the right dress just above the knees showing her well-groomed legs. Amanda had always taken care of herself, but hadn’t done much in recent months. Perhaps because her intention was not to be noticed by any man, so she would be sure of no flirtation or probable commitment, which she did not want so soon.
Antônio arrived at the agreed time; in fact, promptness was one of his biggest virtues. He had many, she concluded smiling.
- Would you like to go somewhere special? - Antônio asked as they left the apartment.
- You choose where to go. - She answered with no suggestion in mind.
- Can we go to that restaurant near barrinha? The atmosphere is nice and we have the option of the most reserved seats or not.
- Great choice. - Amanda replied pretending naturalness.
- Is there a problem Amanda? - Antônio asked when he realized she was trying to hide something. “Would that dumbass of her ex-husband have bothered her again?" he wondered.
None! Why? - She replied making Antônio move his head no. Grabbing her waist, he took her to the elevator. - I talked to Lucas today! - She said as they went in.
- Really? How is he?
-Very happy. He loves the farm. - She remarked smiling. - He asked for you. - Antônio smiled at what he had just heard, because it was very pleasant for him to know that the child remembered him, despite being in a wonderful place like a farm.
- Your son is a great kid. I like him very much. - Amanda heard Antônio speak about her son, thanking him with a smile and remembering how he had been important to the child in the absence of the father.
- Did you tell him his father is here? - He asked after a while.
Yes I did. - The smile she had on her lips faded. - He was cheerful, but did not ask questions about his father. I think Lucas closed himself up for that feeling toward his father. - It was not what she would like it to happen, but she could not change what Breno did by himself.
- I understand how he feels. I was also abandoned. - Antônio commented surprising her. - But I had wonderful people in my life that helped me a lot and sadness went away. Everything passes, including pain. - He still felt the pain, Amanda could see, but had certainly outgrown it. This is what really mattered.
- As you say, life must go on. - Amanda spoke to erase the shadow that had come up.
- It must go on. - He repeated. - Let me help heal this wound in Lucas and yourself – he asked. Amanda looked at his hand on the car gear and imagined wearing a ring with his name. It seemed so odd, but still felt some comfort on such a vision.
- Okay Antônio. I will accept your help - said Amanda and Antônio tried to hide the smile so as not to scare her. - I was talking to my mother early today. She thinks the way you do, that I need someone in my life right now.
- We will do the way you see fit. No need to be embarrassed should anything be different from what you imagined or wanted, okay? - He asked catching her cold hand and then immediately turned his attention to the avenue.
- Thanks again. I want to leave this right open to you as well. Regardless of the moment, if you think it is impossible to continue with this story I’ll grant you carte blanche to step out of it as you please.
- I do not intend to do this, but if it makes you feel more reassured, I accept. - Antônio said when he saw her hands rubbing each other indicating anxiety.
Now please, let's go ‘cause I’m starving. I haven’t eaten well in days. - She asked, because since Breno had come looking for her she had not had a quiet time like this.
On the way they talked about it with more intimacy which left Amanda less concerned, Antônio did not seem to mind the life they would have as friends.
The restaurant was not full, which Amanda approved. She did not want glances toward them before she was more certain of that decision. The town was not very big, so she always met someone she knew when going went out with her son or Carol. She hoped this would not happen that night.
- It would be prudent if we went out more often together before marriage, so it will be easier for people to understand and not make too many questions. - said Antônio when they were sitting.
- You're right. - She confirmed still unsure of her decision.
- Since you agree with me, I believe you will not be upset if we start with this – he said taking out a small velvet box from his pocket. - We can start our relationship with an engagement or commitment ring, you name it. - Amanda thought it was too early to wear one, but preferred not to sound ungrateful. No other man would do what he was doing for her. To have your life stopped for months, or until God knows when, for the sake of a friend, was no role that many men would play, but Antônio was willing to do it and the least she could do was be grateful.
- It is so beautiful to be worn as a lie – she said looking at the beautiful piece of jewelry.
- A lie that that we will have to convince people it is true. - Antônio said putting the ring on her finger and then giving her a light kiss on the lips.
- He needed not be that good an actor. - Amanda thought and her heart felt as if it would get out of her mouth. What an embarrassing situation that was. She felt like a chili pepper feeling her lips touched by his. Antônio acted like as if that contact between them was all too normal, but for her it was as if they had destroyed part of the brotherly love they felt toward each other.
- If there are acquaintances around, we should exchange a few caresses or we won’t convince anyone. - He explained showing a couple in the background. - Amanda looked suspicious. “They had to get the pretend going as soon as they declared themselves a couple. It was bad luck for just one night”, she thought desiring some more time for the situation to develop in her mind.
- You are always right. - said Amanda at last. - I confess that I had not thought about it. - How to think of something as absurd as a make-believe relationship? That seemed far beyond her expectations.
- Do not worry, I'll think for both of us. I do not want to give people a negative impression of me, that I am a dry man, someone who does not show affection toward his future wife. - Amanda marveled at his comment and both smiled together.
- You are out of this world Antônio. - She seemed to be less tense.
During dinner they talked about their careers. Amanda knew that in addition to successful, Antônio was also an example within the company. She always knew he was a great professional, especially when he had been invited to join the partnership of an important company in the region. But hearing him talk a little more about himself made her even prouder of her dear friend.
When she decided to open her small business she had listened to his advice and put into practice many of his ideas. Although he was trained in architecture Antônio was knowledgeable in many other areas which allowed him to give her some opinions, thus being able to invest and not have unnecessary losses.
- Do you wish to stretch our night out a little longer or would you rather go straight home? - He asked when they finished dinner.
- In our next appearance together we’ll go to oth
er places. Today I confess that was enough for me. - Everything was wonderfully good, but Amanda still felt uncomfortable at his every caress, no matter how small. Another thing that bothered her a little was that beautiful ring on her right hand. It felt uncomfortable there, and sometimes Amanda found herself turning it on her finger to relieve the finger. Antônio also realized her stress, but said nothing.
When they arrived at her apartment they agreed to spend Sunday together so people could see them together and also discuss issues related to the wedding. When Amanda was alone, she sat on the couch and buried her face in the pillow. What was she doing with Antonio and herself? That situation could rather bring havoc to their lives, or at least one of them. The contacts would have to be frequent and she did not like to imagine being touched by a man, even if this man was her best friend. Something told her that it would render emotions she was not prepared to live.
Chapter III
Antônio arrived at 8 am, Amanda was still in bed and was startled by the bell so early in the morning.
- I did not know you used to get up early on Sundays. - She complained with a yawn.
- I wake up early just when I have enjoyable things to do. Antônio smiled at the face that she made.
- What will we do today? - She asked curiously as they had not agreed on anything.
- I'll take you to your future home and the rest will happen. - He spoke and she looked at him surprised.
- Did you buy a house? Even before we set up the wedding! - She did not understand what had happened.
- No Amanda. I have a house that was built some time ago, but because it is too big for me I decided to rent it until the day I decided to go and live there. - Amanda pictured him with his real family moving into the space he certainly had created with great devotion and felt bad that he was postponing his life because of her.
Make-Believe Marriage Page 3