by Lori Herter
Ronnie was thinking about logistics. “If he doesn’t have use of his legs, I suppose you’d have to be on top of him, so you would be in control.”
Josie felt like such an innocent. “You talk about it so matter-of-factly. I don’t even know how we’d—”
“Let him figure that out.” Ronnie gave her a reassuring look. “He sounds like a nice guy, Josie. You need this experience. Go for it!”
“But what if I do, and…and then I like him all the more? I don’t think he’s in love with me. I asked him if he thought we were in love, and he said he didn’t know. So he’s probably not. To use your term, I think he’s ‘in lust’ with me. I know everyone does it nowadays, but I’m still old-fashioned enough to not like the idea of he and I just using each other for sexual gratification.”
“But, Josie, you need to have that experience. Look at it as overcoming a hurdle. Once you’ve cleared that hurdle, then it’ll be easier for you to have other relationships.”
Tears stung the backs of Josie’s eyes. “What if I don’t ever want anyone but Peter?”
Ronnie sighed. “I guess I was right when I said you must be in love with him. You were doubtful then, but now you seem to know how you feel.”
“I didn’t think I could fall in love anymore. But the closer I get to him, the more I don’t want to imagine myself without him. I may be scared of making love with him. I’m afraid of disappointing him, too, because I’m so inexperienced. But what if it all goes well? He’d be the man whose tenderness rescued me from emotional oblivion. I’d probably be ready to love him forever! And what would I be to him? A woman who happened to be handy when he was out of circulation.” She looked at Ronnie. “I think he has some use of his legs. And he’s got a positive attitude. Someday he may be able to overcome his disability. Then he wouldn’t need me anymore. He could go out and get any woman he wanted. He’s extremely attractive.”
“So are you! Don’t count yourself out so fast.”
“Yes, he finds me attractive. But he doesn’t have many women to choose from at the moment. I’ve lived like a stick-in-the-mud most of my life.” Josie’s tone grew rueful. “I don’t know that I have what it takes to keep a playful, charming, hunk of a man fascinated once he’s out in the world again.”
Ronnie shook her head. “You think too much, Josie. Just live in the moment. Why worry about the future? With all this recent earthquake activity, there may not be a tomorrow!”
AL WALKED INTO the sandwich shop, looking for an empty table. As he scanned the small restaurant, he saw the blonde he’d bumped into when she was coming out of Earthwaves. He stopped in his tracks when he saw who she was with. Josie! Well, well, well.
The two women were deep in conversation and didn’t even notice him. He studied them another moment, just to make sure it was indeed Josie. Then he turned on his heel and left before either woman could see him.
He went to a McDonald’s drive-through instead. Eating as he drove, he headed for Peter’s house. Best to get there before Josie returned, he decided, planning his strategy as he chewed his hamburger.
Al was sick of Peter always stealing the limelight with his smooth looks and personality. He used to admire Peter for that. Peter always had friends. He always got the girls, too. Including Cory.
Al had been infatuated with Cory. She’d been vulnerable, on the rebound from her old boyfriend, and Al felt as if maybe he had a chance with her. Then Peter had gone after her and stolen her away. Peter’s sisters were warning him not to marry her, so Al chimed in, too. But Pete had to go and marry her anyway, taking her out of circulation. That had been the turning point. After that, Al decided he’d had enough of Peter’s cozy Irish charm and his flashy smile.
Sure, Mr. Popularity had come in handy when they needed private investors to start up Frameworks Systems. But it was Al’s brainpower that had made the company grow to be competitive so quickly. And he was damned if he was going to let his pretty-boy partner share the credit. He’d spent too many years in Peter’s shadow, slaving away in the lab while Peter charmed the employees and their investors. Al had finally decided to make his own plans.
Now Josie was in the picture. Peter’s hiring her had thrown Al at first, but quickly he realized Josie seemed to be just the thing to keep his partner distracted. Peter did have a pathetic weakness for women. But Al had underestimated Josie, and she was getting on his nerves, even coming up with new ideas. She was a little too smart for her own good.
Al had kept a low profile long enough. It was time to make his move. And Josie, very conveniently, was playing right into his hands. Now was the moment to reverse his strategy and get Josie out of the company. The bitch was in his way.
PETER FELT at loose ends, eating lunch by himself for the first time in several weeks. Josie had told him she had an appointment at noon. She hadn’t said what kind of appointment. A doctor? Dentist? Peter was curious, but she hadn’t volunteered information, and he felt asking might seem intrusive. He may have seen her without clothes, may have brought her to orgasm, but he still didn’t know all that much about her personal life. She didn’t talk about herself a lot, though she had revealed her heartbreaking secret to him. He realized he wanted to know everything about her: what she was like when she was a girl, how she spent her time when she wasn’t working, what kind of movies she liked, what her life goals were.
One of the few things she’d told him was that she didn’t want to marry. Peter knew that was a direct result of her traumatic first sexual experience. Would she change her mind about marriage if she discovered that sex could be pleasurable?
Why was he asking himself that? He wasn’t even sure he loved her. Yes, she was sweet, sensitive, vulnerable, adorable, considerate and caring. And beautiful, brilliant, sparkling and surprising. But thinking highly of her didn’t mean he was in love, or ready to remarry. He simply wanted Josie, longed for her so much sometimes he couldn’t quite think straight.
God, he thought, mindful of how his brain was working, maybe he was in love. Maybe he ought to be a little more scared of his own feelings. If he was indeed falling in love, then he’d better keep his head together. This was exactly the time in a relationship when his sound judgment usually took a hike into no-man’s-land.
His mood turned grim. With his unknown assailant still out there, with ominous feelings constantly following him like a dark shadow, this was no time to let himself lose his head over a woman.
It was all too much to think about, he decided. Getting Josie to trust him enough to have sex with him: that was all he wanted and needed right now.
He went upstairs to his workout room. With Josie out and no one in the house, he ought to take advantage of the opportunity to get on the treadmill, lift a few weights. He’d gotten away from his exercise routine. A while back, he’d done ten or fifteen minutes’ worth before going to sleep. But after being in the spa with Josie the last several nights, exercise wasn’t on his mind when he went to bed.
He’d just worked up to three miles per hour on the treadmill when the phone rang. Annoyed, he stopped to answer it. There was a wall phone near the door. “Hello?”
“It’s me, Eileen. You have a minute?”
“Sure.”
“I have two reasons for calling. I heard on TV that there’s been an unusual swarm of small earthquakes. And we had that 4.9 here in Orange County. It’s making me nervous. Are you worried?”
Peter recalled Josie’s description of the new earthquake theory, but he didn’t want to alarm his sister. “I wish I’d gotten my new bookcases fastened to the wall in my living room, I’ll say that. I’d been planning to do it just before my accident. But your place is pretty well earthquake-proofed, so you’re in good shape. All you can do is be prepared.”
“They interviewed a man from the U.S. Geological Survey who said that the pressure on the San Andreas has been building up at a faster rate over the last few months. They just finished a study and it was on the news this morning.”
“I missed that. Been distracted lately. But pressure’s been building up on the San Andreas for decades. Whether recent changes will make the fault line snap is something no one knows. Your house is quake-proofed. Your kids have their little helmets for bike riding. Have them keep ’em by their beds, to put on if a quake hits during the night. You’ve got your emergency water and food supplies stored and a first-aid kit, haven’t you?”
“Yes, sure, I’ve followed all your advice over the years. Gives me the shivers to think of a major quake hitting here. Well, on to subject number two, which is a lot happier,” Eileen said, taking a lighter tone. “Our parents are off the ship. Mom just called me from Florida.”
“The cruise is over?” Peter had forgotten all about it. “They have a nice time?”
“Sounds like it. Mom said she took seven rolls of film, so you know what we’re in for next time we see them.”
“I’m yawning already.”
His sister laughed. “But before we hung up, I asked her about that song. The one you called me about.”
Peter’s ears perked up. “What’d she say?”
“First of all, she was astonished you were interested. But she couldn’t recall the title, either. She said it had a funny name.”
“Funny?”
“I think she meant peculiar, not ha-ha funny. She thought she remembered the first stanza, though.”
“I was sure I remembered the beginning the other day, but when I looked it up, I still couldn’t find it. I thought it went, ‘My true love said to me—’”
“That’s it. Mom said it began, ‘My true love said to me, “My mother won’t mind, and my father won’t slight you for your lack of kind.”’ She remembered the part that we were trying to get, too. I wrote it down. The next line is, ‘She stepped away from me and this she did say, “It will not be long, love, till our wedding day.”’”
“Wedding day…” Peter felt as if he’d been socked in the stomach.
“Yes! And Mom went on to explain about Great-Grandpa Patrick and Great-Grandma Maureen and why it was their song.” Eileen’s voice grew lively. “See, Patrick was at a party and they asked him to sing. So he sang that song. Maureen was a guest, too, but he’d never met her before. As he sang that refrain, ‘It will not be long, love, till our wedding day,’ his eyes happened to settle on her. And she was looking up at him, all enthralled with his voice, and that’s when they fell in love! It was love at first sight. That’s why it became their song. Isn’t that romantic?”
Peter felt dumbfounded, as though the rug had been pulled out from under his injured legs. “Yeah,” he mumbled.
“You men! Completely unmoved by anything romantic. Our Irish ancestors had passion! All American men think about is ball scores.”
“No, I’m interested. But if it’s all about the wedding day, then what’s with the mysterious last verse that was only sung at Maureen’s funeral?”
Eileen sighed. “I didn’t get into all that. Mom was calling long distance. I didn’t want to keep her on the phone. When she gets back, ask her yourself.”
“Okay.”
“Peter, I thought you’d be a little more excited. You were so intent on learning everything about that song when you called that day.”
“I am glad to know the words. It’s just that they’re a little unexpected. Why would a song about a wedding day pop into my mind?”
“Are you thinking about getting married?” she asked a bit slyly.
“No.”
“What about that new woman employee?”
“I told you, she’s not interested in marriage.”
“Oh. So…no romance there? She’s just an employee?”
Peter shifted his eyes to the ceiling. “Don’t be nosy, Sis.”
“Aha!”
“Never mind!” He chuckled, glancing at his watch. “Thanks for calling. I have to get back to work now.”
They said goodbye and hung up. Josie had been gone almost an hour. He’d better get back to his wheelchair, before she returned and discovered him up and about. As he went down the stairs, he still felt disconcerted. He hadn’t thought of that song in decades, then it had sprung into his mind from nowhere the instant he’d first seen Josie.
Peter sat down in his wheelchair, left at the bottom of the staircase. The old love-at-first-sight story of his great-grandparents had left him a little shaken, too. What did it all mean? That from the moment he’d looked down on Josie from his window, he’d known that this was the woman he’d love and marry? Was that why the song kept haunting him, driving him to figure out what the lyrics were?
Peter had sometimes suspected he might be a little more romantic than most guys, but this—this took the cake! Maybe his thirty-foot fall had knocked his brains a little loose. Or maybe his scrape with death had left him slightly psychic. But if that was true, he ought to have figured out who had tried to kill him by now.
His musings were interrupted when he heard a key turning the lock of his front door. Must be Josie returning, he thought. His heart began to beat faster, and he realized he’d better get his head together. He might be in love with her, but he wasn’t sure he could deal with her knowing it just yet.
He could hear the keys of his alarm system being pressed so the alarm wouldn’t go off. Taking in a long breath to regain his cool composure, he wheeled himself forward. As he rounded the corner of the hallway, he was taken by surprise. It was Al, not Josie, who had come in.
“Hey, Pete.” Al smiled a little. “Dropped by ‘cause I’ve got some news. You won’t like it. But you need to know.”
“News?” Peter could sense something a little different in Al’s demeanor.
“Got a call the other day from Martin Lansdowne.”
“Lansdowne!”
Al nodded. “Wanted me to meet him at Earthwaves. So I did.”
Immediately, Peter grew alarmed. “You went to Earthwaves? By yourself? Are you nuts? It might have been a trap. If they tried to kill me, they could try to kill you, too!”
Al shifted his eyes, then rubbed his nose. He looked as if the idea that anyone might try to kill him hadn’t entered his mind until now. And even now, he looked surprisingly blasé. Peter was surprised at his reaction, or lack of it.
“Guess I’m not paranoid. You’re right,” Al said, as if placating him, “I should have been more careful. But, turned out the reason he had me see him was to offer me a job. Promised the moon if I’d go work for him.”
“He was trying to steal you away?”
Al looked as if he liked that way of phrasing it. “Yeah, he tried to steal me away, get me on his team. I told him you were my oldest friend and I wasn’t about to desert you, not for any amount of money or prestige.”
Peter leaned back with relief. “Glad to hear it. Thanks.”
“You’re welcome! But that’s the good news. Got some bad news, too.”
“God, what next?”
“Josie Gray. I stopped by a restaurant near Earthwaves. I started to go in when I saw her eating lunch. With a chick from Earthwaves. Seems she’s still in contact with her former comrades.”
Peter felt a sinking feeling in his chest, but wouldn’t give in to it. Al must be mistaken. “You’re sure it was Josie?”
“Oh, yeah!”
“How do you know the woman she was with was from Earthwaves?”
“Because I almost bumped into the same chick when I entered Earthwaves’ plant. She was leaving, had car keys on an Earthwaves key chain. In Lansdowne’s office there’s a picture on the wall of the employees. She was in the photo, standing just behind Josie.”
Peter recalled the photo Josie had shown him the day she first came to his house. “A young blonde?”
“That’s the one.” Al seemed taken off guard. “You’ve met her?”
“No. Josie showed me a photo of the employees, and I noticed the blonde standing behind her. She had her hand on Josie’s shoulder. They looked like they might be friends.” Peter’s heart lightened a bit. “So
maybe she’s just having lunch with a friend. It doesn’t have to mean anything.”
Al rolled his eyes. “Come on, Pete. Don’t be a stooge! Did she tell you who she was having lunch with?”
Peter hesitated. “No.”
“Did she even tell you where she was going?”
“She doesn’t owe me explanations.”
“So she didn’t! Why? Probably because she didn’t want you to know she was still in touch with Earthwaves. It’s like I thought in the beginning, Pete. She’s spying for them. She passes info to Lansdowne through the blond chick.”
“I can’t believe she’s a spy.” She couldn’t be, Peter thought. Josie was too shy, too sweet to be a spy. But then, what better persona for a female spy to adopt?
“You believe her line that she left Earthwaves for ethical reasons? She may look innocent, but I had a hard time swallowing that one!”
“You’re cynical about everybody,” Peter argued.
“I’ve known you a long time.” Al pointed his finger at Peter. “You’re smart, likable, honest, all those good things. But you’ve got one major weakness, Pete, and you know it. Women! I tried to tell you Cory was going to be trouble. So did your sisters, but you wouldn’t believe it. You see a beautiful woman, you get dazzled by her body, and pretty soon you don’t know up from down.”
Al paced as he continued. “They don’t give me the time of day, so I don’t get sucked in like you do. I can see what’s what, while you’re thinking with your dick! I suspected Josie from the beginning, and sorry to say it, but I was right. She’s bad news!”
Yes, Al had warned him about Cory before he married her. Still, there was something that didn’t add up in his assessment of Josie. “Then why were you encouraging me to have sex with Josie?”
Al shrugged. “Like I said, just looking out for your total recovery. I was giving her the benefit of the doubt because you wanted to trust her. But now that we know she’s still in cahoots with Earthwaves, you’re going to have to cut her loose.”
“Fire her?” Peter shook his head, unable to concede that that was his only option. He couldn’t lose Josie, not without giving her a chance to defend herself. “I want to hear her side of the story first.”