by Love, B. T.
“Wow,” she said. “You’re good.”
If only she knew.
We spent the next few minutes discussing our careers. She wanted to be a marine biologist which I thought was awesome. I could tell she was an intelligent woman; she could be anything she wanted. Then she got around to asking about what I did for a living. Trying my best not to be completely dishonest, I told her I was in the disposal business, and then I patted myself on the back for coming up with such a clever analogy.
“Oh. Like the garbage company?” she asked.
“Something like that.”
She was so full of questions, but it was refreshing. The women I entertained myself with only wanted to have sex and party; having an actual conversation with a woman was a nice change. I was kind of surprised that I was enjoying it so much; it made me realize just how much I needed it in my life.
And then the joke came about me not being interested in women because I had a little dog. She blamed it on the wine but I think she was just trying to hassle me in her own unique form of flirtation. It irritated me at first but I found it hard to get mad at her. Instead I silently informed her in my head that she would instantly change her opinion about me if she were to let me ravage her between my bedsheets.
And then she turned the tables on me, asking me if I thought she was easy because she was a college girl. I knew she wasn’t easy; she didn’t act like an easy woman. When I told her she seemed inexperienced, her eyebrows lifted and she told me she was far from inexperienced. Let me tell you, that look she gave me turned me on more than she knew. And that wasn’t a good thing, because I was supposed to stay away from her. It was no secret that I was not the man she should be with. She was a good woman; I was a bad man. She deserved someone better than me.
It pained me a little bit, but I told her that I would always see her as the little girl that Eli had often talked to me about. Part of that was true, but it didn’t mean that I looked at her as a sister. In fact, it was the complete opposite. I was gazing at a remarkable beauty, one that I spent a huge part of my life vowing to protect even though I wasn’t planning on ever meeting her. When she was a child I looked at her as a poor victim of a bad man’s actions, but as she matured I took note of her obvious beauty. And once she was a mature woman I couldn’t deny that she was one I would be so lucky to ever touch.
She smiled, even though I could tell the words weren’t those of which she wanted to hear from me. “Well, you knew of me as a little girl but I only know you as a grown man,” she said. “But, I understand why you see me how you do.”
“If it makes any difference, I think you’ve grown into a very beautiful young woman.”
“Thanks,” she smiled, clutching her wine glass to her chest. “Well, this water and wine did what I needed it to do. I’m going to go back upstairs and get some shut eye.”
When she stood up out of the water, my eyes dismissed her scars and this time shifted to her dangling belly button ring. Her body . . . Damn, it was perfect. It was hard to not stand up and pull her against me, especially since I knew that based on her flirtation she would welcome me to kiss her. But I knew I had to keep my distance. “Okay, Scarlett,” I said, my eyes meeting the prettiness of her face once again. “Sleep well.”
* * *
I smiled down at the picture of Scarlett on my phone. It was my new favorite. How a woman could look so vulnerable yet so strong and attractive was beyond me. She had hidden the scar on her chest well by pulling her hair around to one side but I still envisioned it clearly. I wished she wasn’t so self-conscience of them; they were a symbol of her will to survive.
I was slowly becoming aware of the strong affect she had on me. She had literally sent me over the edge earlier at the pool. When she swam beneath the crystal-clear water I couldn’t wait for her to emerge so I could see what she would look like with her hair slicked-back. It didn’t matter that I had my arms wrapped around another woman, Scarlett was the one who had my full attention. And when she finally broke through the water she didn’t disappoint. Her hands smoothed back her long wet strands and her breasts glistened from the drips that were running over them. It was almost too much to handle. I kept eye contact with her as I lowered my lips down onto the neck of the woman in front of me, secretly desiring it to be Scarlett’s skin I was breathing against. My actions pissed her off and in turn spurred her to give me the middle finger. But god, that only excited me more.
“What are you so focused on?” Eli asked.
My head shot up from the picture of Scarlett on my phone. “Nothing,” I answered as I stuck it back in the pocket of my board shorts.
“Here comes trouble,” Eli said as Tiffany, one of the girls I had been spending the day with, came up to join us.
“The party’s getting lame,” she said as she laced her arms around me.
“Yeah, well, it’s getting late.”
She leaned back and ran her hand up my bare chest. “What do you say we take this party back to your place?”
“My place, huh?” I smiled.
“Yeah, baby. I can bring Lacy too, if you know what I mean.” I could literally see Rebecca and Eli grimace out of the corner of my eye.
My eyebrows lifted. “Both of you? Well that definitely sounds like a party I’d be interested in attending.”
She snorted out her little annoying laugh that I actually very much hated, and then pushed her gigantic breasts against me. “Well let’s go then.”
I smiled and looked up, trying to find Scarlett. It was like I couldn’t even relax with that beautiful girl running around; I just had to know where she was at all times. “Yeah, yeah babe; go ahead and meet me out front. I’ll be out in a few.”
“Okay,” she smiled, walking away with an exaggerated sway of her hips.
Now, any man would be so excited by the invitation of an attractive woman and her equally attractive friend agreeing to ‘party’ back at his house. But not this man. I only had one thing on my mind, and it wasn’t sex with the two bimbos.
“Well that was disgusting,” Rebecca spoke up, breaking the silence.
Eli shrugged. “Yeah, but he’s single so it’s not that disgusting . . .”
“You mean you would go back and bang those two girls if you were single?”
“Don’t answer that, it’s a trap,” I joked to my friend.
Eli raised his hands in defense. “I’m just saying, they may be irritating but they’re not too bad to look at. But I would only do it if there were two of you babe . . .”
“Nice save,” I said before taking a swig of my beer and beginning my search again for the real woman at the party.
“Hey,” Eli said, hitting my shoulder. “I uh, I’ve noticed that you’ve been eyeing my little sister quite a bit.”
“What? No I haven’t,” I scoffed.
“I’ve known you a long time, man, and I know the way you look at women.”
I spotted Scarlett and held my beer out in her direction. “You think I look at your little sister the same way I look at Tiffany and Lacy?”
“No, actually. I think you look at her in a completely different way. And that’s what worries me.”
“What the hell are you talking about?”
“He’s right, Troy,” Rebecca added. “We’ve all noticed it.”
“You guys are full of shit.”
Eli shrugged. “Listen man, you know why you have to stay away from her. She’s different from the rest of us.”
My eyes narrowed as I pulled my shoulders back, making myself much bigger than he was. “You think I don’t know that? I’m not an idiot.”
“I’m not trying to cause problems, Troy. It’s just, Scarlett doesn’t know what you do. And if she finds out she’ll run right back home, and I don’t want that to happen. I don’t want to scare her away.”
“I disagree,” Rebecca said. “Scarlett’s a grown woman and she’s no idiot; she knows about the stuff your family is still involved in, and it doesn’t seem to scare her
.”
“Yeah but Troy’s involvement is different—”
“I get it,” I said with irritation. “I’ll keep my distance from her. I just gotta find that letter I wrote her in the box your dad gave her so it doesn’t raise any questions.”
“You still haven’t found it?” Eli huffed. He shook his head. “I told you you shouldn’t have even written that thing to begin with.”
I looked back over at Scarlett and saw that Vladimir had approached her, the situation putting me on instant alert. “What the hell does he want?” I said as he took her hand in his and kissed it, the sight making my heart beat faster as my anger heightened.
“Well that’s not good,” Rebecca said.
“No,” I agreed. “No, it’s not.” I only wished I had a way to hear what he was saying to her. Vladimir had the tendency to come off as a sort of Casanova, and coupling that with his money and power made him even more dangerous. It blinded women from the threatening side of him, the side I knew so well.
“At least that didn’t last long,” Rebecca said as Vladimir left.
Scarlett looked over at me. I couldn’t hide the expression of anger on my face as I tilted my head back and finished my bottle of beer. I wasn’t mad at her, of course, I was just livid that Vladimir would hone in on such a sweet and innocent young woman. Yeah, he was an older guy but he had his choice of women, which he regularly partook in. But why did he have to exert himself to Scarlett? She was off limits.
When her uncle went over to her I looked over at her dad to see him nod, asking me to come see him. “I’ll be back,” I said as I went over to see what he wanted.
“You see that?” Mitch asked as I approached him.
“Yeah. What do you think it was about?”
“No clue. But I don’t like him getting close to my daughter like that.”
“I agree.”
He sighed heavily as we watched her and Ted talk. “Listen, I want you to keep an eye on Vladimir. Just, you know, make sure he doesn’t get too close to Scarlett.”
“I understand.”
“You know the situation that’s at hand here . . .”
“Yeah,” I nodded. “Don’t worry about it.” I knew his concerns were about his debt to Vladimir. He owed quite a few people some large amounts of money, and sometimes those men took it upon themselves to collect their debts in different ways.
Ted ended his conversation with Scarlett and came back over to us. “I don’t know,” he said as he crossed his arms. “He said something about wanting her to take a ride in his limousine or something like that.”
“And what did she tell him?” I asked.
“I don’t know. But Scarlett’s a smart woman; she won’t have anything to do with a man like that.”
I couldn’t help but think that a man like that was also a man like me: Someone who was dangerous; someone she should stay far away from.
* * *
I pushed her wrists down against the bed and pinned her down with most of my body weight. “Knock it off,” I said calmly down at her. “You’re not getting this letter back.”
“I’m gonna spit in your face,” she said, mimicking my tone.
“Try it and see what happens.”
She tried to calm her heavy breaths as she looked up at me. “I think it’s time I hop on a plane and go back home.”
“I think that’s the best idea you’ve had since you got here.”
“You’re a dick.”
“You haven’t seen anything yet.”
“Give me my letter.”
“No.”
“Then tell me why.”
I moved her hands together and pinned them down with one of mine, using my other to retrieve the envelope from my pocket. “Because it belongs to me,” I said as I held it up to next to my face.
“No, it doesn’t belong to you. It was written for me.”
“I know it was; I wrote it.”
Her face softened. “What do you mean you wrote it? You wrote me a letter?”
“Yes, I did.”
“When?”
“Five years ago.”
Her eyes focused on the envelope. “What does it say?”
“Something I don’t want you to read.”
“Then why did you even send it to me?”
“Because I needed to get something off of my chest, and I knew it would be sent back like all the rest were.”
Her gaze relaxed as she stared up at me, and I could tell her mood was changing from being angry about me pinning her down, to being pleased with it. “What on earth would you need to get off of your chest?” she asked. “You didn’t even know me.”
I took the letter away and stuck it back in my pocket. “That’s something you don’t need to concern yourself with.” I released my grip from her wrists and pushed off of her; I was beginning to enjoy being on top of her too much myself. “I don’t mean to be a dick to you, but you can’t have it.”
She pushed up onto her elbows and glared at me. “I’ll get it back.”
“Not if I burn it first.”
“You wouldn’t.”
“Scarlett, you have no idea what I would or wouldn’t do.”
* * *
“Are you kidding?” I asked Eli as I sat in the bubbling hot tub in the dark.
“No. She actually got into his limo with him after he offered to treat her to lunch at his restaurant.”
I was pissed; Scarlett knew better than to do something stupid like that. And of course, she did it while I was away for a couple of days, staking out a hit I was planning on taking care of within the next couple of weeks. “Well, she’s lucky he let her out.”
“You really think Vladimir would have done otherwise?”
“Who knows?” I shrugged. “You never know who’s gonna do what, especially when there’s debt involved.”
“Yeah,” he agreed. “Well, she’s talking about going home soon, so, that’s probably a good thing. I mean, as much as I hate to see her leave I think it might be for the better, until dad gets out of some of his debt at least. I kind of feel like she’s got a target on her back.”
I nodded. “Yeah, yeah me too.” I agreed that she was safer back home, and that she had a huge invisible target on her back. But even so, I didn’t want to see her leave. I was finding myself addicted to her presence. And being on top of her, pushing her against her bed . . . Damn, I hadn’t been able to get that image out of my head. I knew exactly what she felt like beneath me and how her chest rose and fell with her deepened breaths; I saw how her hair fell away from her face, openly displaying her neck for me to put my lips against. I still wanted the chance to feel her even deeper than that, to get inside of her heart as well as her body.
“I’m going back inside,” Eli said, breaking my train of thought.
“Alright. Oh hey,” I stopped him. “I found the letter.”
“You did?”
“Yeah.”
“Good. That’s for the best.”
I laid my head against the concrete as he walked away. Figuring out what to do about Scarlett for the remainder of her visit was going to be tough. For one, she was weak as hell; she couldn’t fight me off of her at all. Not that she would be able to anyway, but at least she could have performed some kind of self-defense to get me off of her. My mind was reeling figuring out how to both keep an eye on her and keep a respectable distance from her at the same time. But that was proving harder than I thought it would be. Even when I wasn’t physically near her my thoughts sure were. When I had went back to my house with Tiffany and Lacy after the barbeque I couldn’t stop myself from imagining her in their place. Instead of the two naked women in front of me I had two naked Scarletts, complete with scars front and back. And when they went to speak I silenced them so instead I could imagine Scarlett’s smooth voice telling me she wanted me to make love to her. I was in a constant state of delusion, and I was loving every second of it.
* * *
She turned me on more than ever tr
ying to fight me off of her. And now she was straddling me, letting her weight rest against my body.
“Why?” she asked quietly.
“Why what?”
“Why am I different from the other girls?”
“I, I don’t understand your question.”
She leaned forward and brought her face down closer to mine. “The other girls I see you with. I’m pretty too, aren’t I?”
Of course she was pretty; she was more than pretty. I brought my hand up and tucked a strand of her hair behind her ear. “You’re beautiful.”
“Then why don’t you want me?”
“That’s not an easy question for me to answer.” It wasn’t, because the truth was that I did want her. I wanted her more than anyone in the world. I only wished I could tell her that.
“Do you think I’m too young for you or something? Because you shouldn’t; you’re just a couple of years older than my brother.”
“No, no. It’s not that at all.”
“Then tell me.”
I brought my hand to her chin and ran my thumb along the side of her jaw. “I think the letter will explain it for you.”
“The letter? But it was from five years ago. How could—”
“Just read it, Scarlett.”
* * *
I put my arm around her waist and pulled her against me while staring down at her lips. Trying my best to keep my composure, I placed my hand on the side of her neck and used my thumb to tilt her chin up to face me. “Does me touching your neck like this scare you?” I quietly asked her.
“No,” she whispered her answer. “It excites me.”
I moved my mouth lower to hers, our lips almost touching; it was hard to keep from joining them. “What if I told you that this same hand that’s touching your neck right now has strangled the life out of someone. Does that scare you now?”
She pulled her head back and locked eyes with mine. “What, what do you mean?”
It was time to get everything out in the open, whether it was for the best or not. I had made a huge mistake by not writing the correct name on the fake letter I wrote up for her to read, and she spotted it. But that was what seemed to be happening to me since she walked into my life. I couldn’t think straight; I was messing things up, which was a bad habit for a man in my profession to do.