by Ruby McQueen
“And yet here you stand in front of me, thinking you have class. Hmmm… You know, I can probably help you out with your situation.” And I gesture my hand to suggest I mean all of her.
“What situation?”
“Oh, Sugar-puss… That situation you have where you need that massive pole to be removed from your asshole, so a guy could finally plunder your booty! I could arrange a guy; I know the type of guys you shop for… Then, after some wealthy, no personality beefcake fucks you into next week, I’ll teach you how to suck dick soooo good, you might finally have something Levi’s into!” she has more smoke billowing out of her ears than the Vatican chimney. I delivered the final blow in such a genuine tone of help that it’s the nail in the coffin. A crisp crack rings out across my face from her slapping it and then she throws the remains of her martini over me before storming off. I hear Aly-B’s sharp intake of air from behind the camera from disbelief, while the guys start applauding.
“Yeah T! She’s outta here!” It’s Merrick’s deep, earthy voice.
“Why thank you ladies and gents,” I respond to the cheer with a mock curtsy and the exaggerated ‘thank you hands’ that they do at the theatre. And Derek approaches me from the side as the camera stops rolling.
“Holy shit balls, dude!” I exclaim looking at Aly-B with a look of ‘what was I thinking?’
“Fucking crazy! She had it coming though.”
“I can’t believe you had the camera out! How was the timing?” I shake my head; it was quiet the show, my unedited mouth on full display. I am more likely to fire up without the drinks in me truth be told, so her strategy was kind of floored.
“I know, timing is everything! But anyway…” she pops the phone away again, “Let’s hear it about Mr Gamer?”
“What do you want to know?”
“What’s he like in the sack?”
“Well, I wasn’t disappointed, and I gave him a thorough test run, so I’ll be feeling him all week,” I scrunch my face up and wiggle in my seat as though it’s uncomfortable, but truth is, I like how sore I am, it’s the only proof I have that it was all unbelievably real! She laughs at me.
“Such a tramp. Sniff test?”
“Second-whiff for sure!”
The sniff test- a juvenile game we play thanks to Levi. It’s the smell scale of hotness from one to five for any guy we come across now to measure how hot we find his scent. Levi being the yard stick by which we measure all men. It goes a little something like this:
Not even with your vagina. (In other words, he smells feral and if the survival of the human race was reliant on this individual, we are all doomed!)
Meh. (So-so but doesn’t really have a hope.)
Noice. (Bogan slang for ‘nice’ thanks to an Aussie TV series “Kath and Kim”, maybe there’s a chance, but most likely friend zone instead.)
Second whiff (He smells so good; we need to go back for another smell and yes please.)
Giddy up! (Yes, thank you, our panties just evaporated and now we would like to immediately jump your bones.)
Levi is a solid ‘Giddy up’, but Derek is right up there too.
“OKAY, so he’s good in the sack, hit’s second whiff on the sniff test, is a hottie, is clearly into you, so when are you getting together again?” she assumes a pose, green eyes twinkling with hope for me and my love life, learning forward to discern every possible detail from me, taking it all in as if she lives through me vicariously. She’s kind of adorable in a no bullshit kind of way.
“Well, funny you should ask… on the weekend,” I can’t suppress my smile I am so excited about it.
“I knew it! Like what are we talking? Date or sex?”
“Well, sex basically.”
“Well, what’s the plan then?”
“Rock his world. I thought I just have to give him the most amazing sex ever,” I have complete comfort talking sex and other nastiness to Aly-B, but my feelings for him need to be downplayed somewhat for my own comfort.
“Oh my god, are you thinking sex chair?” she lights up a little with her expression becoming animated. I bought a sex chair thing about a year back, the ‘Tantric chair’. It’s an earthy, red leather upholstered number, set on a timber base. It is shaped how I imagine a very curvy woman on her side, with a dip in the middle of two higher peaks, the head peak being higher than the foot end. Truth be told I read on it more than fucking, I lay there, feet flopped over the end, and it’s pretty damn comfortable for that, but for sex, it is really a nice little addition to my bedroom.
“Ohhhhh yeaaaah. I’m thinking tie his ass up and tease the shit out of him,” I grin and nod. I am going to dominate him thoroughly.
“Well, I’m gonna need details bitch-flaps, no more holding out on me, got it?”
“Got it.”
“You better.”
“Yep, definitely,” I wink at her.
She pulls out her phone and glances at the screen.
“Shit, time to go, or we are gonna be late. Eldon will be back now,” Oh, great. I wonder glumly if I have more music to face over the Kamryn incident.
“Righto, I’ll sort the bill,” I get up and head to the counter and thank Tan for a lovely meal, as always, it was lip smacking. I pay for it before joining Aly-B out on the pavement where she is waiting for me.
We walk in tandem back towards or building, passing all the other suits returning from lunch. I muse that we are office zombies all trudging through the weekly work program. I’d much rather be doing something more exciting, but this pays the bills, I guess. I can’t complain, although I don’t ever have that much money left over at the end of my mortgage and bills. Buying organics is more expensive, but worth it in the long run I tell myself. And after the health issues I had as a child I value health in more ways than one.
We chat about Aly-B’s plans for the weekend, Brian has the weekend free and they are doing a weekend bus trip around different chocolate factories and boutique shops, kind of romantic, although Aly-B is hardly the romance type, but Brian adores her and they enjoy any time off they have together. I look at them and hope one day I can have that too. Someone to adore, who accepts me, my shit from the past, my fading looks as I age, someone who is into my brand of kinky and crazy. Yeah, I admire how much she has her head screwed on for someone so young. She is my little spring of hope for me and Mr Right.
Back at my desk I work quietly on the new spread sheets Eldon has requested for each broker, giving him a complete overview of their sales performance for future appraisal, not really in my job description, but something a little different and more pressure on my time makes my day fly along quicker.
I catch the bus home at the end of the day. Thank god I survived it! Not a word from Eldon, although technically I didn’t see him, so that discussion may still be in the pipes. I sit quietly on the ride home, with some “Avenged Sevenfold” cranked up loudly in my ears to drown out any thoughts, I just want to numb out from the world for a while and lie low. I watch the people coming and going in silence with the odd nod and smile to acknowledge them from time to time.
I have to deal with Merrick tonight though, Monday night basketball, that means the inquisition continues into my mystery friend from the weekend and more explaining myself, yikes!
~ Chapter 9 ~
The space between
I check the clock hanging on my kitchen wall as I go to make a protein smoothie for myself and Merrick to down after basketball. It’s a blend of organics; banana, blueberry, cinnamon, coconut oil, chia seeds and vanilla protein powder with a little pure raw honey to sweeten it. He should be arriving any tick of the clock, so I hustle to get it ready.
Merrick Carver is my no-bullshit male best friend from school, the male equivalent to my Aly-B. I love hanging out with him, he’s a big bear of a man at six foot three and very bulked out with muscle and covered in tattoos. He’s a good-looking guy; brown hair, green eyes, striking features and golden outdoorsy skin. We have so much in common right down to food ob
session and taste in music, he’s just ten days older than me and I would say exactly my type, but he’s more like my big brother. He’s a personal trainer and works as head trainer alongside Aly-B’s Brian and at our Gym ‘The Heat Wave’. He is what I envisage ancient warrior types to resemble; gym junky- sports freak, athletic and agile for a big guy, very masculine, deep earthy voice, very ‘jock’. He says what he thinks and is very upfront and honest always, whether you want it that way or not, intelligent and deep, what you see is what you get. He is in many ways a rock to me, solid and unwavering in support. When I need a talk about guys and where I’m going wrong, he’s my Mr Deep and Meaningful. He is warm, genuine and friendly and attracts women easily, although he’s not too interested in settling down yet.
He shares a place with Flynn Harvey at Liverpool Street, Darlinghurst, pretty close in location to Brian and Aly-B who are in Victoria Street, Darlinghurst. Makes commuting together to work with Brian easy.
Flynn is a riot as well. Twenty-six, five foot ten with short, ash coloured hair which he usually spikes the front up with product with very dark brown eyes framed with strong eyebrows, one eyebrow is pierced with a black bolt. He’s a very attractive guy, close to being a pretty boy, affectionately nicknamed ‘Zoolander’ by Merrick who is fond of naming us all, not bulked like Merrick, but still cut with lean muscles, also a fitness freak but you expect that from a sports nutritionist. He holds two degrees from Deakin University, his Bachelor of Exercise and Sports Science and his Bachelor of Food and Nutrition Science. He is the head nutritionist at, you guessed it, The Heat Wave. He is intelligent and nerdy, although it’s hard to pick because he plays the guitar like nobody can and has a very cool rock-and-roll quality about him. He plays in a band regularly as more of a passion or creative endeavour than a quest for fame. He is funny and has a heart of gold and also has no issues getting ladies, however, he has issues being in a relationship for longer than about four months it seems. The three of us goof around often and have a blast.
Hard to imagine being such good friends with guys, but truth be told neither Aly-B nor I, are that feminine personality wise and clash with strong bitchy types, these guys are a better fit for sure. I might not have had a great childhood or past, but I consider myself very lucky with the friendships I have now. Blessed even.
I hear my buzzer go off and I go to my intercom and hit the answer button.
“Buzz me in, T.”
Shortly after I buzz him through, he is filling my doorway.
“How goes it, big man?” I say casually as I collect our travel protein shakes and place them in my small black backpack.
“Pumped and ready to win, T. If we win the next three, it’s us in the semi-finals.”
“Hells yeah.” I high five him as we exit the shoebox. We took runner up trophies last year, which is nice and all, but Merrick and I were bummed about it, although you have to be a good sport about these things, it still left a nasty after taste in our mouths.
We exit the complex and begin to make our way down the street towards Centennial Park where the sports stadium is located, just a fifteen-minute walk. I love living so close to the park.
“Sooooo, you and Derek, is that a serious thing or what?” Frankly I was surprised it took him that long.
“Nah, don’t reckon. Just fucking.” I look at him after I say it and he raises his eyebrows in disbelief.
“Really? He seems pretty into you.”
“Nup. Just that he has wanted us to fuck for a long while now, build up, epic blue balls, you know?” I make light of it chuckling as I say it. God, I really don’t want to retell the story.
“I know… But I think it’s more than that, Trinity.” Trinity, so rarely he uses my name, I know he is serious. Wait, he knows? His words finally dawn on me.
“Errmm, what do you know, exactly?” I enquire puzzled.
“He told me how you met and all.”
“He did? Do tell!” I’m dying to know, I know so little about him in some ways, his true motivations, what I mean to him, am I just that hot piece of ass? I have so many questions that I have to refrain from hitting him with a full-blown inquisition which will only give away my true feelings.
“Well, I know about all the flirting and stuff between you two, you know, coming together and all that.” Oh great, yeah, I must be super important to him.
“He told you that? But you just met!” I can’t believe it! He just meets my friends and blabs about us, just like that! After I had kept it to myself for so long!
“Yeah, but I told him you were my baby girl, and I had your back and if he does anything stupid, I will kill him with my bare hands.” I stare dumbfounded, blinking and speechless.
“Look, trust me when I say this, you’re not just a booty call, T, he likes you.”
“He said that, or you think?”
“I’m a guy, I recognise the signs.”
“Ok, he didn’t actually say that.” Just as I thought.
“He didn’t need to.”
“And you’re sure?”
“I’d bet on it, T.”
“Ha! I’ll take that bet! What are we talking?” I know it’s pathetic to be betting against myself, and I briefly wonder if I’m sabotaging this already or straight up in need of therapy. We stop at the end of the street and go to cross the busy road thick with peak hour traffic, commuters returning from their city jobs.
“Are you serious right now?” He asks me after we finish jogging off the edge of the road after threading through the four lanes of traffic.
“As a heart attack.” He slows his pace down a little and glances at me searching my face for something.
“So, let me get this right? You think he just wants to fuck you?”
“Yup.” I state plainly, it tastes of truth to me.
“Why? Why couldn’t he be interested in more?” He is asking, seriously, Mr Big-time Goof, staring straight down the pipes of the barrel wanting me to dance as he fires shots around my ankles. Oh, yay I muse hearing the voice in my head tinged with lacklustre sarcasm. A deep and meaningful with Merrick who is surprisingly reflective and wise at times, who is hard to argue with and often stops my thoughts dead in their tracks.
“Ok, for one thing his age. For two…” Crap, I don’t have a two.
“Yes... Two?”
“Eerrmm...” I mull over it for a second then it dawns on me “He gives mixed signals, very hot and cold, just looking for a fix when he’s horny.”
“And how old is he?”
“Twenty.” I shoot off a look of mock horror as I say it, but I do think him being a young male means he can’t commit, still out there ploughing the fields and what-not.
“It’s more about maturity than age, T, and he seems pretty mature. Let’s look at the facts. He relocated for work, which says to me that he takes his work commitments pretty seriously. Now, a guy who takes his work commitments seriously, most likely takes any area of life involving commitments seriously.” God damn it!
“Great! How do I argue with that?”
“So, you want to argue about it? You want to be right? That sounds like you are looking for an excuse, Baby Girl.” He extends a thickly muscled arm and taps me on the shoulder like he’s offering me a revelation.
“God, you’re right.” I let out a heavy sigh and drop my shoulders as his words hit me. I know his observations will ring through me later on tonight, most likely while I’m trying to go to sleep.
“Hey, what are friends for? Now come on, let’s jog the rest.” And before I can respond he is metres in front of me.
That’s the cool thing about Merrick, straight past the meat of the topic and down to the bone, the bullet between the eyes, short and sweet. He doesn’t dwell, just gives it to you, then gives you space to think about it. I push it to the back of my mind and try in vain to catch him. He is surprisingly fast for a big man, agile and flexible even though his frame is heavily bulked out.
Blades of grass flick up behind his every stride a
nd the breeze against my face cools my cheeks except for the briefest moment when the heat of my breath gets pushed against my skin as I exhale in pants. We arrive at the stadium after cutting through the park. I can never catch Merrick in a straight up sprint. He stops outside the double doors and starts stretching. A couple of girls pass behind him, clearly enjoying the view. We play as ‘The Heat Waves’ sponsored by the gym and full of members and a few of Merrick’s clients. There is a minimum requirement of two girls per team for mixed basketball. We are very competitive but have lost a few games due to a lack of numbers a few nights, our teammates having work or family commitments that conflicted with our Monday nights.
“Ready to kick ass?” Merrick says while stretching his neck out by lowering his ear down to each shoulder consecutively.
“Hells yeah, Captain, ready to giddy up.” I hold up my hand for another high five as we go move to enter.
Tonight’s game is a tough one, we play ‘The Boosters’, which is a team made up of Boost Juice employees. I happen to love, love, love Boost Juice, but tonight, the only taste of them I want is victory. I switch to competitive Trinity, hard metal, a warrior with determination in my eyes and my head buzzing with strategy.
We’ve been playing hard all game and sweat starts to run down the hollow of my back as I take it to the net for a two pointer. I am fouled by my opponent; whose heavy body moves up against me as I get the shot off. It makes the rim and rolls around to the back board before making contact and falling away.
“God damn it!” I exclaim under my breath in frustration. We only have a minute of game play left and are in front by just one point thanks to a great quarter by them defensively. They have fouled us more as a result but slowed our scoring down. I need both these points to count. Merrick approaches me with a double high five for the foul.