by Ruby McQueen
“Mysterious? What secrets?” Aly-B enquires picking up his queue as she puts down the bottle of lube that is making its way around like all the other presents in a pass-the-parcel style fashion. Oh goody! Not!
“Well, she has a new admirer for one thing.” Merrick winks at me as he outs me. Bastard!
“No, I don’t!” Sweet Jesus, Aly is gonna be pissed at me for not mentioning it.
“The hell you don’t! Jet Li has lover’s nuts over her bad! You should have seen him after basketball Monday night, all over her.”
“That’s not true!” I protest.
“And you didn’t tell me? I can’t believe you! Who are you?” She looks at me with exaggerated mock-horror.
“It’s not like that at all!” I try to make light of it.
“Oh? Well what is it like?” She demands crossing her arms.
“He was just being friendly after the game, no big deal.”
“Friendly? Ha! He kissed her hand, you should have seen it, worse case of lover’s nuts than Nikko.”
“Nothing happened, and he’s making it sound way worse than it was!” I point my thumb in Merrick’s direction in an accusatory manner as he tries to suppress his laughter.
“Ok, what am I missing, aren’t you with that dude from last weekend?” Nikko sounds confused, but then Nikko always sounds confused, particularly with women. God how he lusts for them, with absolutely no understanding on how to get them to lust after him in return, well in the long term, anyway.
“Well, no one’s sure what’s going on with, Trinity, these days.” Flynn adds his two bits worth.
“Heeeeey! Why am I getting picked on?” I whine. Although the answer is somewhat obvious, I don’t really do relationships not even really attempting them if I’m honest. I resigned myself to the fact that I’m not good at them so why bother? The odd torrid affair to get the blood pumping and have those raw primal urges extinguished, but without any emotional attachment. I don’t use them or lead them to believe it will be anything other than sex. And it has to be said there has been the odd dud bang along the way. I don’t mind discussing my sex life with my friends as we are all fairly open, but the emotional side of things is dysfunctional and leaves me fleeing the other direction.
“Ummmmm hello? It’s my night people.” Izy points out, wanting to be the centre of attention and rightly so! Or that might just be my enthusiasm for wanting the attention squarely off my love life.
“Ok, I’ll buy the first round of drinks.” I Say eagerly jumping up and making my break for the bar.
“Not so fast you.” Aly-B is up and with me as I head to the bar to place my order. Damn!
“Ok, let me just start by saying, nothing happened, there’s nothing to tell.” I state defensively.
“That’s funny, cos Merrick and Flynn sure seemed to think something was pretty fucking hilarious, so something is up!” She adds in thinly veiled humour.
“Ok, after basketball this guy was a bit friendly, but I sent him packing, said I was seeing someone.”
“Oh... Holy shit! You said you were seeing someone?” She can’t believe that I’m ‘fessing to the crime.
“Yup. I said that shit... No need to jump up my ass, yeah, big deal, I admitted that shit.” I sound dismissive as I admit it out loud sounding goofy.
“Ok, so where is he then? Is he coming tonight?”
“I have no god damn idea!” I order our drinks, a flirtini for the Birthday girl, a Sex on the beach for Aly-B, a black magic for me, a dark and stormy for Merrick and three Jack Daniels with coke for the others.
“When was the last time you heard from him?” She sounds baffled, well welcome to my world!
“Like last Sunday after I left his place.”
“Why haven’t you messaged him?” Her demeanour changes swiftly from confusion to chastising.
“I didn’t want to seem clingy.”
“Are you kidding me right now? Oh great! Now you seem uninterested! You...Idiot!” She holds her hand out and places the other fisted on her hip and demands “Give me your phone, we’re calling him!”
“Oh helllllllll no! No way!”
“Hell yes, don’t be a sooky-lar-lars, hand it over.” She is as serious as a heart attack, and I am in two minds, half of me agrees that we should call him and half of me thinks he should have contacted me well before this.
“What if we just message him?” There’s my compromise.
“I can’t believe you sometimes, little miss balls deep in yelling at the boss last week, but too much of a cry baby to call a guy.” She reinforces the hand gesture of demand.
“Fine! But I’ll do it.”
“Fine!” I pay for the drinks and ask our bartender, Joe, to bring the tray of drinks to our table while I dip back into my small bag for my phone, with a restless Aly-B hovering over my shoulder making sure I see it through.
“Ok, how about this?” I begin typing while she eagerly looks on.
*Hiya, Hot Stuff, thinking about you* and I hit the send button.
“Oh my god you are so fucking lame!”
“Well I don’t wanna sound desperate or anything!” I retort.
“Do you want his cock in you or what? All I’m saying is that was fucking lame and I think you can do better!”
“Fine, I have an idea, I’ll take a picture with some fuck-me eyes.” Although in a bar that’s starting to attract a fair crowd, channelling my inner temptress is going to be a bit of a challenge!
“Now you’re talking! Grab a tit too.”
“Hello? Bar full of people!” Like come on already!
“Here give me your phone I’ll take it for you.”
“Don’t you send anything without showing me, or I swear to god!”
“Just shut up and think about riding his mushroom shaped fuck-stick or whatever.”
“Oh Sure! I’m gonna think dirty with you saying shit like fuck-stick. Shush for a minute, let me do this thing!” We sound like an old couple squabbling.
“Ok, try this, close your eyes and think of something you did together last weekend that got you going.” Hmm that’s easy and hard, there are so many things. I decide to focus on my impromptu strip tease and the absolute look of wild frenzy that was held over him, barely holding his composure. I can feel my heart rate pick up. I miss him. I want him. I open my eyes and look directly down my phone camera, beckoning him silently, please come to me. I hear the shutter make a noise.
“Holy shit, Trinity! I can hear your growler snapping from here! I’d say that’s a wrap!” She looks at the image almost seemingly mesmerised. “Well I’d fuck you.” She adds.
“Me too, Hun.” Some random older guy sitting at the bar clearly eaves dropping, crashes our conversation.
“Get a life, Dweeb.” Aly-B snaps at him without taking her eyes off the photo. I glare at him before turning my attention to the deed at hand.
“Show me.” I move to her side and look at the photo. There is a blaze alight in my eyes and for a moment I stare almost not recognising the siren calling down the lens, oh yes, they are some fuck me eyes!
“Damn!” I exclaim. “Here we’ll send it.” I take my phone and add it to the message and hit send.
“Done! Now let’s have a drink, for god sakes!”
“Yep, I’m dry as.” She responds as we snake our way through people back over to the rest of the group who have already started drinking the first round. We take our drinks from the table and sit back down. The drinking continues as does the laughter while everyone gets into the swing of the celebrations. Nikko brought a really fancy Birthday cake and sparklers and had Bartender Joe stash it in their fridge for later. When we light it and sing her Happy Birthday, most of the bar joins in chorus much to Izy’s delight, she thrives on all the extra attention, with people who don’t know her buying her drinks and wishing her well. I’m sure it rejuvenates her spirit to bask in so much interest.
As Merrick returns from the bar with the next round of drinks, he places them on
the table grabbing his and mine from the tray and brings mine over as he takes a seat beside me.
“Don’t look now, T, but your friend is here.” I perk up at the news sitting up in full attention.
“Finally!” A rush of heat ripples through me as rampant excitement and anticipation mingle deep within me. I crane my neck around Merrick to pinpoint his location. I had been keeping a check of my messages, waiting fervently for Derek to respond up to thirty minutes ago, then resolving to not look at it after that. But that news just lit my fuse.
“No, not that one, your new friend.” He adds motioning his head to indicate the direction I should be looking.
“What?” Oh no, no, no! Please god, no! Not tonight! “Are you sure?” I ask in disbelief.
“Yep, certain.”
“Did he see you?” Mild dread starts setting in.
“No, I just noticed him as I collected the next round of drinks.”
I look over in the vicinity but can’t see Ezra there. I see a group of people gathered around near the bar as laughter erupts with loud chatter ensuing and the group shifts as a guy emerges slapping someone else in the group on the shoulder before making his exit towards the restrooms. As he passes another body moves and directly in my line of sight is Ezra.
“Holy fuck!” I quickly slump back into my chair trying to use Merrick as cover. “I can’t deal with this, Merrick. I wanted Derek, and he’s not here, just Mr Hot and Heavy.” I motion his direction and Merrick lets out a loud belly laugh.
“Shhhhh he’ll hear you dummy!”
“Tell him you’re not interested then, problem solved.” He swigs back his drink as he states the obvious.
“Does he really look like the type to back off though?” He shakes his head and gives me a look with the hint of a wisecrack lurking past his eyes before settling down into a more serious facade.
“No, I don’t think so. What are you gonna do then?”
“Fuck, I’m not drunk enough to deal with this! I need a few more drinks in me.” I’m not sure now if I am becoming desperate for Derek to turn up now or dreading it. I dig out my phone and check the time, almost nine, and still no messages from Derek. Great! I know that using alcohol to deal with feelings of tension and anxiety are unhealthy, but for now, I need to take the edge off.
“What’s going on over here then?” Aly-B pops over picking up on my anxiety levels no doubt!
“Oh, you know, when it rains it pours.” Merrick, forever ribbing someone and that someone is often me! So, I flick his thigh with the back of my hand.
“Well, funny story... You know that guy that was sniffing around me after basketball...?” I sway my head around in mock laughter before doing a round of fake sobs.
“Yes! What? Is he here?”
“Bingo.” Merrick adds.
“Holy throbbing vaginas! Where? Show me what he looks like?” She sounds keen as punch, but I’d rather just grab a bottle of something and get hammered in the toilets by myself then deal with the weirdness.
“No freaking way! Are you insane? He sees me and then what? And if Derek does come?” I shoot my hands up beside my head in an ‘I give up’ fashion.
“Suck it up, Princess! Just point him out.” She thinks I’m being silly, but I don’t even care, I seriously don’t want to deal with it.
“Well, what if you and I go to the bar Aly, I’ll point him out and we can get this one three or four shots?” Merrick interjects with a possible solution to my affliction.
“Five, ‘quick-fucks’ thanks.” I add getting up. I go to move chairs beside Flynn, hoping their spot near the hanging glass beads gives me some cover. Well, as much cover as a bunch of clear glass beads on a string can give you, I guess.
“Hey Sweetie, what’s going on? You look like you’re wigging?”
I take a deep breath and just blurt it. Hell, what do I care! I’m kind of tipsy after all the liquor thus far anyway, and I’ve been sucky at flying under the radar.
“Well, the basketball dude is here, but I was hoping Derek would show up! And now I’m not so sure I can handle them both in the same room if he does show up!” I lean my head over onto my arm to hide my face. I take a deep breath before looking up at Flynn, all casual cool he looks at me with sympathy and strokes my hair in vein trying to soothe my fraying discord.
“You and guys, huh? Well at least they both seem better than those two guys that trolled you, that’s an improvement.” He tried, bless him! He’s right though, both of these guys seem normal at least for now. My last serious relationship was way more serious on his side of the fence and when I tried to end things, oh boy! Jayden Fitzsimmons never seemed quite right from the start. We were never a match, more a forced conquest which ended up with me trying to polish a turd rather than concede to another bad relationship. I suspected he cheated on me, which only made the decision to leave easier, but instead of us parting ways amicably things got weird with him, weird like him stalking me, which resulted in me cutting and running with a surprise relocation. I vowed after that, no more running, time to face the score, come what may.
Aly-B reaches me first before Merrick with another round and my shots. Praise Je-suss!
“Well squeeze my tits and call me Mumma! He is gorgeous, Trinity! I think you should take him home and tie him up and make him your bitch!” With that Brian makes his way to Aly-B and places his arm around her possessively.
“Who’s a bitch?” He enquires.
“This one here, keeping things from me!” We both laugh a little as I chuck back the first of my shots as Merrick sits down beside me again. It makes me shudder and the sweet warmth calms my nervous energy. I plop the empty shot glass back down on the tray and get the next and scull it down. Izy bounds over with Nikko from the small downstairs dance floor to grab a drink before going again.
“It’s true.” I finally say, “I’m a sucky friend.”
“Yeah she’s been such a ball bag lately.”
“Well, how ‘bout you stop being a sucky wife and come do some dirty dancing with me?” Brian squeezes Aly-B suggestively and nuzzles her hair before kissing it.
“Ewwww gross... Fine... lead the way.” It amuses me no end how much she sounds grossed out by any loving or sexual act when I know they are a great couple. I will overcome my dating demons and get there too, I hope. I throw back the rest of my shots in rapid succession. I only need to stay out of sight from Ezra until ten o’clock as then the upstairs room and balcony will be opened where the proper dance floor is and a live band play, where everything is darker and louder, down stairs is more the seated area and bar with a jukebox and a small area to dance. The next half hour flies past and I am feeling the effects of my alcohol a little more. I sit there listening to Flynn tell me about his last bed fellow and Merrick tell us about the new larger lady’s boot camp he’s taken on. He is so animated and funny I can’t help but drop my guard and let out a hearty laugh, throwing my head back.
I look at Merrick as I go to sling off at his situation but am halted dead in my tracks. Just past him I lock eyes with Ezra who is sitting casually on a stool leaning on his elbow, a hand propped up rubbing his bottom lip in an almost voracious fashion, with me being the most enticing item on the menu. I want to look away but can’t tear myself away from his gaze. Acting like prey is the surest way of ensuring you are hunted, so the discovery channel says. He slides off his stool oh-no! I should have looked away, now he thinks I’m interested. It’s too late and I still can’t break my eye contact away from him.
He strides towards me looking so polished, he has on a perfectly fitted black shirt which has a sheen to it. It’s casually unbuttoned at the front but tucked into some gun metal grey suit pants adorned with a belt, elegant silver slimline buckle gleaming as he approaches me. It’s like a car accident, you don’t want to witness the impending horror, but you are somehow too mesmerised by it to draw your eyes from the scene. The look in his eyes makes me flash scarlet red and I think I hear my name but I’m not sure, my
world has just shifted on its axis and I’m not sure if I’m still anchored to reality. He is on the prowl from beneath the hair that hangs perfectly across his brow in that hot model way and I’m not sure what to do next. A lump starts to form in my dry throat and it’s too late, he is here now, and I wait apprehensively for what comes next.
He stops in front of me and smiles, which I mimic weakly.
“G’Day mate, how’s it going?” Merrick is the first one to break the ice and greet Ezra introducing him to Flynn, and they take turns shaking hands, Ezra warmly responding and reluctantly breaking eye contact with me. I exhale my tightly held breath and scramble for the half a glass left of Merrick’s drink. Dark rum and ginger beer, not really my thing, but I scull it as he stands, and I savour the cool ice on the back of my tongue as it melts. As he sits, he looks at me puzzled and I grin guiltily as I crunch the rest of the ice and hand him back the empty cup.
“Well I’m up for a refill, anyone else?” He looks directly at me.
“Yes please, could I have a double pineapple Mojito?” I smile at him and his brow furrows in confusion before adding “Coming right up.”
“I’ll be back in a sec too guys.” Flynn says getting up and heading to the rest room. Great! Everyone ditches me, that’s just grrrrrrreat!
“Good evening, Trinity, you look... Breathtaking tonight.”
“Ezra.” I nod quietly in acknowledgment so as not to be rude. He extends his hand out which I want to refuse, but reluctantly receive. Please don’t kiss it I silently plead. As he goes to raise my hand up, I panic and pull back from his hand, but his grip tightens and before I realise, I am hoisted to my feet and standing but a few inches in front of him. My pulse races in anticipation. He pauses momentarily before raising my hand up and while his eyes burn deep within me, he plants a slow soft kiss against the skin on the back of my hand. His warm, soft, plump lips pouting slowly against my flesh make me instantly think of watching those lips touching me elsewhere making the muscles deep in my core clench to my horror, I immediately flush red and my heart almost stops. He gives me a devilish grin as he lowers my hand back down.