Micah stalked to the bedroom door and placed his palm over the lock. A small manipulation of his thumb, a stroke across the key hole, and it gave free. He stepped into the room and shut the door. The silk of a pale pink nightgown draped Madison’s body to her ankles. Hair-thin straps held the garment in place. Without careful inspection it would be easy to pretend her taut nipples were all that held the fabric in place.
“Forgive me.”
She nodded, but he didn’t miss the nervous swallow. A virgin in his bed and instead of taking her viciously he would strive to gentle his technique. The irony.
He gulped another steadying breath and none of his rabid lust eased. He could do this, take their coupling slow, and ease her fears enough she’d be an eager participant in the bedding.
I can do this. Even if he had no idea how to proceed leisurely. Since his fall from grace, he couldn’t remember fucking the female species with gentleness in mind. His idea of a good time was hard, wild, nasty and sometimes violent. His pleasure was all that had ever mattered. Until now.
Best to get it over with it and pray I don’t fuck it up.
Micah walked to her and she fidgeted beneath his heavy perusal. He hooked a finger beneath the strap on her right shoulder and twisted it around his digit. “Did you pick out this gown with me in mind?”
Madison licked her lips and elevated her gaze from his chin to his eyes. “Yes.” A murmur that resonated with hesitation. “Mother said it wasn’t provocative enough, but I would’ve been uncomfortable in something more revealing.”
“It’s plenty provocative, Madison.” He tugged the strap over her shoulder and down her arm, dragging his knuckles along her flesh. “Imagining your curves beneath the silk…” He laid his other hand along her neck and shoulder, a touch to claim her as his. “Very provocative.”
Anything more revealing and he would have lost control the moment he spied her near the bed.
Hooking his thumb in the strap remaining, he pulled it down, rasping her skin with his palm.
He stared at the material clinging to her taut nipples. The gown defied gravity for several heartbeats—teasing him—before giving into physics and gliding down her body, baring her to his cultured gaze. The material pooled at her feet, leaving her clothed in only a pair of pale pink bikini panties. He’d rip them off with his teeth if he didn’t worry his aggression would frighten her.
“Gorgeous,” he said and meant the compliment.
Breath kicking into a tailspin, her breasts rose and fell, taunting him into action. A lick and nibble on one nipple, while he pinched the other, rolling the nub between his fingers…she stiffened beneath him. Micah lifted his head and looked at her. Frown lines slashed across her forehead.
He’d been gentle, or thought he had managed to soften his touch. Maybe he should’ve practiced with another before tonight.
Going to his knees, he removed her panties quickly and pressed a kiss to her abdomen. Then unable to resist, he nipped the tender flesh. Another flinch shifted through her body. Sitting back on his heels, he gazed up at her and positioned his hand between her thighs. He watched her bite her bottom lip as he caressed her tender flesh. Dry. Not a preferable reaction. Adjusting his stroke, he used his thumb to circle her clitoris. More cringing and she turned her head aside with a grunt.
Seconds later, Madison’s hand clamped on his wrist and she cast quick, timid glances in his direction. “That hurts.”
“Very well.” How could he teach her lust if she didn’t enjoy his touch? He stood, stepped to the bed and pulled back the covers. Motioning with his hand, he said, “Climb in, kitten.”
A moment of hesitation before she stiffly crawled onto the bed and pulled the covers to her chin. He chuckled at her modesty, but snatched the blankets off her and tossed them to the foot of the bed. “I wish to admire your body as I disrobe.” She blinked and remained silent. “Watch me as I undress.” An almost indiscernible nod, but she did as he requested, her gaze following the movement of his hands.
Hoping he could incite her lust, he took his time removing his clothing. His tie went first and he nixed the urge to restrain or blindfold her with it. Not for their first time. Play could come later, when she was less nervous.
He took his time releasing the buttons of his shirt and tugging the material off. As he tossed the white garment aside, he caught her eyes scaling his chest. He hoped that was admiration in her scrutiny. His hands dropped to his belt and her attention tagged along. Shucking his underwear with his slacks, he paid careful attention to her focus on his raging erection.
“What are you thinking, Madison?”
Her gaze flashed to his. “That I have no idea what you expect of me.”
“I want you to be you. It’s all I’ve ever expected from you.” Micah went to his knees at the foot of the bed and crawled up her body.
None of his caresses were well-received. Growing frustrated by her less than enthusiastic reception, he wedged first one knee between her thighs and then another. He forced her thighs apart, wide and settled between them. Her breaths came in shallow pants, fear glazed her eyes and her fingers curled in the sheets. She hadn’t touched him once. No idea how to coax her body to respond, only one thought remained…he must consummate the marriage.
Micah thrust deep. A silent gasp parted her lips and her eyes went wide, glistened with tears. He regretted his abrupt entry instantly, the hurt of his invasion on her features reminding him too late she’d been an innocent in need of his patience. He buried his face in the curve of her neck and shoulder, demanding his body remain still while she adjusted to his invasion. But then she made a small movement with her hips and he submerged to the hilt inside her body. Nirvana couldn’t have tasted so sweet.
What he called animal instinct took over—invade and conquer, claim and mate, filtered through his head. Lifting his head to stare at her, he gripped her hips with his hands. “You are forever mine.” He didn’t recognize his own voice it’d grown so rough and unnatural sounding. Madison remained mute.
He took her hard, lifting her hips off the bed as he drove into her with bold thrusts. Their connection defined by the quick slaps of flesh against one another. Biting her bottom lip so hard, it turned white around her teeth he thought to tell her she’d draw blood if she didn’t stop, but no words emerged and he drove into her over and over again, showing his virginal wife no mercy.
Lust drove him out of his mind, a response he’d never endured before. Madison choked in a breath and turned her head aside, tears wet on her cheeks. Micah attempted a last futile attempt to reign in his animal instinct and failed.
He didn’t know how long he took her like a fucking demon, but he knew it was longer than necessary. Much longer than normal. Her whimpered cries had turned into sobs she attempted to hide from him. He hurt the woman he loved and she still sought to spare his guilt. Micah hated himself.
In a red haze glazing his vision, he thrust deep and came, biting her shoulder as he groaned his release. A strangled gasp from her and she remained brittle still beneath him.
A very hollow feeling moved into his gut. He released her hips, realizing too late how tightly he’d clenched them. He tried to cup her face, but she snatched her face out his hands. “Madison…”
She shook her head quickly. He understood she couldn’t bear to look at him, not now and he’d respect her wishes. She deserved that after his roughness with her.
Micah flexed his hips and exited her body. Madison winced. Moving to his side, facing her, he placed his hand on her stomach, needing to comfort himself by touching her. But, she scrambled to drag the covers over her. Shielding herself from his view. A protective technique he allowed. She rolled onto her side away from him and gave him her back.
Unable to allow this level of distance, he shifted to align his chest to her spine and wrapped his arms around her. He pulled her tight against his frame. She didn’t resist his hold. A small victory he wouldn’t take for granted.
“I’m sorr
y,” he whispered against the back of her neck. “It’ll get better, kitten.” But he’d felt her mental withdrawal like a protective barrier against further suffering.
Virgins weren’t a commodity he enjoyed often. Neither had his sexual partner’s pleasure been his focus before tonight. Failure was a unique novelty and something he could happily never deal with again. Goddamn it, he’d needed her virginity to seal their cosmic deal.
Micah took a deep breath and exhaled. He would make it good for her next time.
Their next time ended just as badly. And a very real tenseness settled into their honeymoon. He had no idea how to proceed and feared he only made matters worse each time he touched her. If only he knew how to rectify his error.
Life Lesson Thirty-One
Madison stared at her reflection. Life with Micah wasn’t as she’d expected. Fading bruises from his too rough caresses and too hard bites littered her body. Each time he took her, she’d ache between her thighs for days. Her daddy had told her only whores enjoyed sex. Too late, but she finally believed him. At least she’d proven she was no trollop.
She thought Micah tried to restrain how hard he was with her, but she didn’t think he knew how to be gentle. And she loved him all the more for his attempt to modify his character. Maybe she wasn’t normal and bruised easier than other women. Women talked in her tea club—what a boring, pretentious group of women—but they all liked sex, wanted it often and talked constantly about it. Maybe this was her punishment for being morally damned.
Avoiding Micah’s request for marital relations took brain power. The same excuse back-to-back wouldn’t work against his craftiness. Enduring his touch as seldom as possible was her ultimate goal.
That first time he’d taken her on their honeymoon six months ago, she’d barely recognized Micah. The patience he’d shown her throughout their courtship had not been evident in his touch. And when he’d realized she disliked all of his violent fondling, he’d given up and taken her. Brutally. She still cringed when thinking of it.
God…her hand shook as she lifted it to run through her hair. The invasive feeling of him inside her…the pain worse than awful…she’d tried to restrain her tears, but the pain had been too much. She wanted to please her husband, but had no idea how.
Six months into their marriage, she loved him as much as the day she married him, but wished sex wasn’t a part of wedded bliss. Outside the bedroom, they got along fine, and enjoyed spending time with one another, but her constant excuses to avoid making love put stress on their marriage. Shunning the random hug or kiss for fear he’d ask for something more did not help that stress. She’d enjoyed his frequent affections before she said ‘I do’, so explaining her behavior now was impossible.
Maybe I should’ve been a nun. But nuns weren’t morally damned. Two days ago while eating dinner at her parents’ house, Daddy caught her alone. She’d never forget his nasty words.
“How’s the marriage bed treating you, daughter?” He’d asked, blocking her path when she would’ve ignored him and went past. She answered with a glare. That didn’t put him off. “He wants you because you’re pretty on his arm and you socialize well with his political buddies. You might be a wild amoral tart in his bed, but you will never be enough to please, Micah. He’s even more immoral than you. Mark my words, he will either leave you or he’ll be screwing someone else soon enough.”
Micah had caught at least part of the conversation. How much she didn’t know. “You son-of-a-bitch!” He’d snarled as he rammed Daddy against the wall using his forearm. He obviously added enough pressure to cut off her father’s breath because he went red in the face and made pitiful choking sounds. The blackest glare she’d ever seen from her husband surfaced and an uneasy tingle teased the base of her spine. No doubt, Micah could’ve killed him without any remorse. “I will see you rot in the darkest pits of Hell before I will tolerate you speaking to Madison like that.”
“Micah, back off.” Momma entered the hallway, arms crossed defensively beneath her breasts. “He has a right to his opinions regardless if you agree.”
Micah laughed, a sinister and unearthly sound that sent chills scavenging across Madison’s body. “You truly wish to defend him against me?” he asked in a voice cut from ice.
He turned his head to face Momma without releasing his chokehold on Daddy, but Madison couldn’t see his face to gauge his emotions. Whatever expression he wore, cowed her mother. She removed herself from the altercation without uttering a word.
“Micah…” Madison placed her hand on his shoulder, the one pinning Daddy to the wall. His muscle flexed beneath her palm. Her husband looked at her, his hard angry features softening for her. “Let him go.”
He shook his head. “No. He must learn to respect you. I will not tolerate his disrespect of you. Not. Of. You.”
His protectiveness of her was part of why she loved him. Respect wasn’t something her daddy would learn at this late date. She no longer sought his approval anyway. All that mattered was her relationship with her husband.
“Release him for me, Micah. Please.” She ran her hand up the side of his neck and into his hair. He melted into her touch. “You’re all I need. Who cares what he thinks. He’s narrow-minded and bitter. I pity him.”
Micah had released her father. Daddy had slid down the wall, gasping for breath. In the next moment, Micah enveloped her in a hug that cutoff her breath. He kissed the side of her head and whispered, “I cannot tolerate his abuse of you.”
Breath was overrated when her husband loved her this much. Daddy said Micah would leave her…in moments like this, her husband proved only when he lost his life would he ever leave her. Of that she was certain.
He’d driven them home and taken her to their bed, making love to her, his touch a tad gentler; his emotions so evident, she could believe he worshiped her. And she enjoyed it briefly…until she allowed Daddy’s words to surface.
The doorbell rang, startling her back to reality. She smoothed her hair down, snapped her spine straight and exited the half-bathroom. She strode down the hall to the door. Micah met her in the foyer, coming from the direction of kitchen where she’d left him eating breakfast.
Madison opened the door to two police officers. With her heart sinking into her stomach, she gaped at them, knowing something terrible wrong.
“Morning, Mr. and Mrs. Dominus.” Officer Grimes Irelan failed to make eye contact, while Officer Tawnya Haecker offered up a curt nod.
Unable to find her voice, Madison remained mute. Their civic duty didn’t require them showing up on her doorstep to wish her good morning.
Micah moved to stand beside her and wrapped his arm around her waist. Silent support, proof he, also, knew whatever they had to say was bad. “Good morning, officers. How may we assist you?”
Irelan fiddled with his hat. Haecker’s attitude was more straightforward. “We regret to inform you that your parents, Bruce and Celeste Wescott, were involved in an automobile accident.”
“Oh, my God!” She slapped her palm over her mouth. Her knees went out. Micah tightened his hold on her and kept her on her feet.
“We recovered their remains from the wreckage in the early hours of the morning.” Irelan detailed. “Preliminary reports suggest they were cruising at a high rate of speed and they crashed into a tree.” Her parents were dead and her last communication with them hadn’t ended well. “There were no skid marks to indicate they attempted to stop the car before impact.”
Hot tears hit her cheeks. Madison hadn’t realized she cried until that moment. Micah pulled her into his arms and she wept against his chest. Not for parents that loved her, but for the unnecessary loss of life of the people she’d spent all of her life with.
Life Lesson Thirty-Two
Madison stared at the kitchen window and clenched the edge of the counter with her hands, hoping the dizziness would pass soon. Married just over a year, she loved Micah as much now as she did the day she walked down the aisle to marry him. Th
e sex hadn’t improved unfortunately. She wished it would. God, she wished it would. Her avoidance of the act placed a dark cloud over their marriage.
The teapot whistled, indicating the water within boiled. She released the counter and took a step backward. The movement didn’t cause her head to start spinning again. Whew! She blew out a breath of relief.
She poured the water over the tea bag in the cup she’d already pulled out and spooned honey into it. For two weeks she’d been feeling…off. She had no other way of describing it. Not having ever been sick a day in her life, she still wasn’t certain if she were sick or what could be wrong.
“What smells so good?”
Madison jumped, sloshing the tea over the rim, but luckily missing her fingers. She clenched her teeth and counted to ten. The counting failed to alleviate even a smidgen of her irritation. “It’s polite etiquette to knock, Elias.”
Elias tossed her a smirk. She had fantasies about slapping that smug look off his face. “But then that wouldn’t irritate you, princess.”
How could she love one brother so much and despise the other one as much as she did him? The man was a slime-ball, always making her feel like he imagined her with her clothes off. He said the most inappropriate things to her, most of them so lurid her cheeks would flame.
He walked further into the room with a confident swagger that she reviled. She slumped onto one of the barstools at the island, and not a moment too soon. Her legs felt like they’d go out at any moment. She needed to eat, but the smell of dinner had her puking at the back of her mouth.
Hoping her tea would calm her rioting stomach, she sipped on the hot liquid and clenched her teeth when Elias taste-tested the spaghetti simmering on the stove. Dear God, the man made himself at home. His gumption aggravated her.
The bread was ready to pop into the oven and she’d boil noodles when Micah arrived home from work. She prayed that would be soon so she wouldn’t have to entertain his insufferable brother for long.
Madison's Life Lessons Page 12