“Take it one minute at a time. You’re still recovering from the accident. Give yourself time to make that decision. It doesn’t have to be decided right away.”
“It’s been four months!”
“Which is no time when you’re trying to adjust to such a big change. You’ve barely had the time to get your prosthetic leg, make sure it fits and go through therapy to learn to deal with it. You had to have left New York right after all that was done.” He’d read up on what the process involved and knew time wise she had pushed herself to be where she was, but she couldn’t see how much she had accomplished.
“There was no reason to stay around.”
“A big city like New York is great to visit, but I’d have a hard time getting used to living there.”
“I know that.” She slid a glance at him, taking in his cowboy hat, boots and jeans.
What did that look mean? She’d known even years ago he wouldn’t fit in. His heart would never be there.
“Madame Zoe asked me to help her with the Summer Dance Academy after I told her about my amputated leg. I don’t understand how she could do that. I can’t help other dancers.”
“Why not?” he asked, determined to focus on the present, not the past.
“I’m damaged. I can’t dance.”
“We all have things wrong with us. It’s how you deal with it that’s important. We can’t control a lot of things in life, but we can control our attitude.” He peered toward Caring Canines. “I can’t force you to take Lexie, but I’m asking you to at least meet her. She may change your mind.” Because obviously I can’t. I couldn’t change it in the past, either.
The door to the building opened, and Emma exited with a white poodle on a leash. She headed for the truck and rapped on the window where Kit sat.
Nate used the controls on his door to lower the passenger window. “We aren’t coming in. Kit has had a long day and needs to rest.”
Emma smiled. “It’s nice to meet you. I’m Emma Tanner, one of the trainers for Caring Canines. Abbey’s sister-in-law, Madi, heard you were coming to meet Lexie and is on her way down here to meet you. She takes ballet at Madame Zoe’s dance studio and raves about you.”
Nate closed his eyes for a few seconds while inhaling a deep breath and holding it. He knew it must hurt her to have to meet someone else who admired the life she used to have. He’d wanted to help Kit, but he was only making everything worse. The sound of his truck door opening filled the cab. Kit scooted around in the seat facing Emma and started to climb down.
“Stay there. Lexie is a lap dog and loves to be held.” Emma handed the small poodle to Kit.
Lexie stood in Kit’s lap with her front paws on her shoulders and licked Kit’s face. Something changed in her expression as though for the present she was totally concentrating on the dog, remembering the one she’d had as a teen. The tension melted from her features, and Kit picked up Lexie, snuggling the pet against her.
“Except for the color, she looks just like Missy in the face.” Kit peered at Nate. “She’s beautiful.”
“That’s what I thought when I saw her. She’s perfect for you.”
“But Missy died. I can’t go...”
“Remember, live for today. Don’t worry or be concerned about the future. We don’t know what God has planned for us. Missy was fourteen when she died. She lived a good, long life. And now, maybe it’s time for you to let Lexie in.”
Kit swung her attention to Emma. “When will she be ready?”
“I have a few more lessons I want to go through with her. I can have her ready Tuesday afternoon. Okay?”
“Yes” came out in a hoarse whisper as Kit gave Lexie a final cuddle, then passed her back to Emma.
“I’ll bring her to pick up Lexie after five Tuesday.” When Kit opened her mouth, no doubt to protest, he hurriedly added, “Please, if that’s all right with you. I can take you before to get what you need for her.”
Kit nodded her head once, a small smile gracing her lips.
Madi, an eleven-year-old, with shoulder-length brown hair and the bluest eyes, came running toward the truck from the main house.
“I see Madi coming. Do you mind staying?” Nate asked, glimpsing a huge grin on the child’s face.
“No, she isn’t much older than Carrie.”
“Two years ago, Madi was in a wheelchair and the doctors weren’t sure if she would walk again,” Emma explained. “She’s one of the reasons why we have Caring Canines. She was our first client.” Emma moved out of the way before Madi skidded to a halt in the opening on the passenger side.
“I can’t believe I’m meeting you. Madame Zoe talks about you all the time,” Madi said in a breathless rush.
Kit glanced at Emma, then back at the little girl. “I’ve heard you had a dog from Caring Canines.”
“Still do. Cottonballs wanted to come, but sometimes she can cause a ruckus when she sees a squirrel. Are you getting Lexie?”
“Yes. I used to have a poodle.”
“She’s so sweet. She’ll be a great pet for you. If you ever want to while you’re here, come to the dance studio when I have class, and I’ll introduce you to my friends. I have class on Tuesday and Thursday at five.”
“Do you know Carrie Somers? She’s my niece.”
“She’s in the class before mine. We go to the same school, too.”
Emma put the poodle on the ground. “I’m going to work with Lexie some more this afternoon. Do you want to help me, Madi?”
“Yes. Bye, Miss Somers. Don’t forget any Tuesday or Thursday. I know Madame Zoe would be thrilled.” Madi stepped back and shut the door.
Kit didn’t say anything until Nate pulled out onto the highway. “I’ll be going to Carrie’s audition next Saturday, but I don’t know if I can go back to Madame Zoe’s after that. I hate to let down those girls when I don’t meet their expectations.”
“Are you sure it’s their expectations you’re worried about or yours?”
Kit sucked in a deep breath. “You don’t pull any punches.”
“I never have with you, and I’m not going to start now. You’re scared people will pity you and feel sorry for you, but you’re doing a great job without their help.”
Kit gasped. “Stop this truck.”
He glanced at the anger carved into her features, her eyes diamond hard. “What are you going to do? Walk back to Soaring S?”
She pressed her lips together. “I could if I had to. This ranch isn’t too far from the Soaring S.”
“Two miles. And yes, you could walk back by yourself, but Howard would be furious with me if I let you, so you’re stuck with me for the next few minutes.”
When the wrought-iron gate with Soaring S written across it appeared, Kit broke the silence. “I don’t feel sorry for myself. I feel angry. Why didn’t I look to make sure all the cars were stopping before I crossed the street? All I saw was the walk button flashing. All I focused on was the fact I was going to be late for the rehearsal. The next thing I knew, I was waking up in the hospital. You’re right. I can be so single-minded that I forget everything else. Checking the traffic would have taken a couple of seconds and my life would be so different. Why did God let this happen to me? He gave me the ability and love to dance and now has snatched it away.”
After going through the gate to the ranch, Nate parked on the side of the gravel road, then angled toward Kit. “Has your love for dance changed?”
Her forehead knitted. “No. I wish it had, then the rest would be easier to take.”
“You can still dance, just differently and maybe not on stage. Your knowledge hasn’t diminished, either. Maybe you should start thinking about how you can use what you have left.” He reached for her hands and cupped them between his. “God has a plan for you. Trust Him. He’s in control.”<
br />
“It’s hard to give control over to anyone, even God.”
He quirked a grin. “I know. I’m still wrestling with that. So if you stay around, you’ll probably be able to throw my words up in my face.” After giving her hands a gentle squeeze, Nate withdrew his and straightened behind the wheel. If he touched her too much longer, he’d find himself drawing her into his embrace and that wouldn’t be good for either one of them.
At the cabin Nate walked beside Kit to the door. Part of him wanted her to invite him inside, but he knew it would be a bad idea.
On the porch Kit faced him, confusion in her expression. “Usually after a tough day, I retreat. Shut down.”
“Is that working?”
Both perfectly shaped eyebrows rose. “No. I know the stages of grief, and I’m still angry at what happened to me. But I don’t want to be.”
“I’ve got a solution. Invite me in. I’ll fix something for dinner and we can talk. Or not. You set the pace.” Obviously he wasn’t listening to the warning inside him to not get close to Kit. But then, with her he hadn’t always done the logical, safe thing for him emotionally. She didn’t know about the time he bought a ticket to New York to try and sway her to give them another chance to work their relationship out.
Oblivious to his thoughts, Kit said, “I know it’s still early, but I’m worn out with all I’ve done this morning and afternoon. I don’t think I could carry on any kind of conversation for long. I’m going to turn in early.”
He inched closer, smelling her usual fragrance, which reminded him of sugar cookies, and took her hands between his. “Do you want me to pick up Lexie at Caring Canines on Tuesday and bring her to you or do you want to go with me?”
She chuckled. “There’s a third option. I could go by myself.”
He inclined his head. “True. It’s your choice.”
“I’d love for you to pick me up. That way I can hold her on the way home. I’ll get her supplies beforehand. I know how much you love to shop and don’t want to put you through the ordeal.”
He smiled at her sarcasm. “You remembered.”
“Like when your friend bought my birthday present? Or the time your mom got the Christmas gift you gave me?”
“Online purchasing has made my life easier.” He released her hands and moved away before he thought they were both the same people they had been in the past. “Good night. I’ll see you tomorrow at church.”
“Maybe. I haven’t decided if I’m going with my brother and his family yet.”
“Then Tuesday.” He stepped back and waited until Kit went into the cabin, before strolling toward his truck.
As he drove away, he wasn’t sure what to think about today’s events. His confused feelings swirled around in his mind until his head ached. When he arrived at his house, pent-up frustration demanded he do something physical to release it. In his spare bedroom while his Great Dane watched, he sparred with a punching bag hanging from the ceiling. But even when he finished half an hour later, he didn’t have a solution to the war raging inside him over Kit.
* * *
Tuesday afternoon, bored and needing something to do, Kathleen dressed to go riding, not just in the pasture near the barn but to her special place. It was important to her to do the activities she used to when she was at the ranch. Riding to the ridge was always on the top of her list every time she came home to visit.
Behind the barn she prepared Cinnamon for their ride, then stepped up on the mounting block. With more graceful ease this time, she seated herself in the saddle, letting her left leg dangle while her right foot was in the stirrup. She was getting used to the change and so was her horse, but if she stayed, she would investigate a better prosthetic leg for riding.
She headed out and set Cinnamon in a walk. Her thoughts drifted back to the past few days. She hadn’t gone to church. When her family left without her, she actually regretted the decision. At first that surprised her because she rarely attended in New York, but then Nate’s words from Saturday came back and stuck in her mind.
God has a plan for you. Trust Him. He’s in control.
She’d never been able to give that kind of control over to anyone, even the Lord, and now that she realized it, she must not trust Him like she’d always thought she did. That, too, startled her. Had she been merely going through the motions of believing, without really putting her whole heart into it?
When she reached the stony ridge, she stared up at the sixty-degree climb over rocks to the top. It was higher than she remembered and the terrain wasn’t as easy to scale. But she was determined to make it to the top. She wasn’t going to let the loss of her leg take away everything she loved.
After dismounting Cinnamon, she tied her to a scrub oak nearby, making sure there was shade and grass to eat. Then with her water bottle, she started up the slope—gently at first. As she planted her prosthetic leg in a pebbly patch of ground, she shifted her weight to that limb and brought her right one up, holding on to a boulder near her. Her left foot began sliding down the incline, but as she tried to adjust her balance and keep herself upright, she went down, her body slipping down the ridge.
* * *
“You’re early. I thought you weren’t coming to pick up Kit for another hour or so,” Howard said while exiting the barn.
Nate shrugged and hopped down from his truck. “I was out this way on a call and decided to come by a little earlier rather than go into Cimarron City, then turn around and come back. A waste of gas.”
Howard wiped his kerchief along his nape. “Sure, you keep telling yourself that.”
“You’re reading more into this than you should. I’m simply early to take Kit to pick up Lexie. Is she at the cabin?”
“Nope.” Kit’s brother removed his cowboy hat and tapped it against his leg, dust flying.
“Where is she?”
“You just missed her by fifteen minutes. She decided to go for a short ride.”
“Which way?”
Howard pointed down the gravel road that led to the hilly part of the ranch.
Nate knew where Kit was headed. Her favorite place. “That’s where the ridge is. Do you think she should climb it by herself?”
“She didn’t mention she was.”
“You know your sister. That’s her thinking place on the ranch.”
Howard sighed. “I know. But how was I supposed to stop her? I wanted to give her a little alone time. Do you really think she’ll try that climb?”
In his gut he knew it. “Yes.”
“I’ll give her a little time, then ride out if she’s not back.”
“Let me ride out and check on her.” Nate’s stomach churned. “Now.”
“You might face her wrath for disturbing her. As you said, it’s her special place.”
“That’s okay. It won’t be the first time—being there or facing her wrath.”
Howard turned back into the barn. “Fine. Don’t say I didn’t warn you. You can take Dynamite.”
Five minutes later, Nate set out in a canter toward the ridge, the whole way trying to figure out how he was going to explain his appearance. Off in the distance he zeroed in on Kit halfway up the steep hill, struggling with her footing. The sick feeling in his gut spread. He spurred Dynamite into a run.
When he arrived at the bottom where Cinnamon was tied, he quickly secured his mount to a small tree nearby, then hurried to catch up with Kit. Both feet suddenly went out from under her. Kit grabbed at a shrub as she slid on her stomach down the ridge.
It seemed as though his breathing and heartbeat stopped for a second.
As she halted her downward plunge, hanging on to a bush, he yelled, “Stay still. I’ll be there to help in a few minutes.” He hastened his steps, almost falling himself while he kept his eyes on Kit rather than on the ground he
was covering.
She hoisted herself up toward the shrub, then sat and turned to watch him. Nate increased his speed before she could change her mind and decide to continue to the top.
“Until now I never thought how challenging this climb was,” she said to him.
When he looked at her again, he noticed the dust and dirt on her front, on her face. “How many times did you fall?”
Kit lifted her chin. “Three, but I’m over halfway to the top of the ridge.”
“How many times do you have to fall before giving up?”
“Never. I’m going to go up there if I have to drag myself.”
The elegant set to her head reminded him of when she danced—her body moving in a graceful, fluid motion that belied the strength, discipline and determination behind it. That same determination was driving her to make it up the ridge, and he found he couldn’t refuse her. If he had to carry her, she would go to the top.
When he arrived and offered her his hand, his breathing came out shallow and the beating of his heart raced. His stomach had settled, but barely.
“Out of practice, too?” She grasped it and hoisted herself to a standing position.
“Running up a hill isn’t usually what I do, so yes, I’m out of practice.”
She rotated carefully, using him to stabilize herself. “Why are you here?”
“I thought I would enjoy the view. It’s been a long time since I’ve been up here.”
“I can do this myself,” she said, removing her hand from his upper arm and continuing her trek.
“I know and you will, but since I’m here, I hope you will let me stay.”
She wobbled on her next step and quickly clutched him again. “If it hadn’t been you, I’m sure Howard would have ridden out here.”
With his arm around her, he assisted her upward. “Yep. See? I saved you from your brother.”
“Who’s going to save me from you?” Releasing her hold on him, she crested the top, a step ahead of him, and paused to take in the view.
Her Hometown Hero Page 8