The Berenstain Bears and the Phenom in the Family

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The Berenstain Bears and the Phenom in the Family Page 1

by Stan




  by Stan & Jan Berenstain

  Contents

  Cover

  Title Page

  1. The Rumor

  2. “Why, When I Was in School …”

  3. Breaking In the Pool

  4. Tryouts

  5. A Hero’s Welcome

  6. Overboard

  7. A Word of Caution

  8. The Big Meet

  9. Victory Pizza

  10. Good News and Bad News

  11. Parent-Teacher Conference

  12. “P-o-t-a-t”

  13. Making the Grade

  Excerpt from The Berenstain Bears® and the Phenom in the Family

  1. The New Cub Reporters

  About the Authors

  Copyright

  Back Ad

  About the Publisher

  Chapter 1

  The Rumor

  “A rumor’s going around that there’s gonna be a special announcement before classes start today,” said Barry Bruin.

  “It ain’t no rumor, it’s a fact,” said Too-Tall Grizzly. “And I know what the announcement’s about.”

  The cubs were gathered in the schoolyard, waiting for the morning bell to ring. Barry was right: a rumor had indeed been going around about an announcement. But it had been started by Too-Tall himself. That way, once everyone was buzzing about the upcoming announcement, Too-Tall could step in and make his own dramatic announcement about the announcement. Nobody was sure how he found out about these things. Did he sneak around the school offices, listening in on conversations? Not likely. Did he have a ring of spies in the school administration? Even less likely. But somehow he always knew what was going to happen before it happened.

  “So, tell us, Big Guy,” said Queenie McBear, poking her on-again, off-again boyfriend in the stomach, “what’s it about?”

  “Swimming pool,” said Too-Tall matter-of-factly.

  “A swimming pool?” said Queenie. “You mean here at school?”

  Too-Tall nodded.

  “They’re gonna build a swimming pool?” said Barry.

  Too-Tall nodded again. “And you know what that means,” he said.

  “Swimming classes!” said Brother Bear.

  “Maybe even a swimming team!” added Sister Bear.

  “Oh, my …,” said Ferdy Factual, putting a hand to his mouth. He looked worried.

  That made Too-Tall chuckle. He had guessed that the new pool would cause great excitement among the student body—and great anxiety among the students about their bodies. Especially students like Nerdy Ferdy. There was a school joke that Ferdy was a thirty-eight-pound weakling, and twenty pounds of that was his brain.

  Skuzz couldn’t wait to add to Ferdy’s anxiety. “And the classes are gonna be code!” he said.

  “Of course they’ll be cold,” said Barry. “Unless they give us a heated pool, that is.”

  “Don’t pay no attention to Skuzz,” said Too-Tall. “He’s an idiot.” He popped his deputy on the shoulder with a big fist. “You don’t say it code, moron! It’s coed. Co-ed. It means boys and girls together. Get it?”

  “I know what it means,” said Skuzz. “I just don’t know how to say it.”

  “If I had a nickel for every thing you don’t know,” said Too-Tall, “I’d be richer than Squire Grizzly.”

  “Gee, I’d better get a bathing suit,” said Ferdy to no one in particular.

  “Now, don’t panic, little guy,” said Too-Tall. “Everybody’s gotta wear school-issue black bathing suits.”

  “Oh, no!” gasped Queenie. “I wouldn’t be caught dead in a school-issue black bathing suit!”

  “Whaddya mean?” said Too-Tall. “You’d look good in a black bathing suit.”

  Queenie blushed in spite of herself. “Gee, thanks,” she said. “But school-issue? They probably look like the suits my mother wears.”

  Too-Tall shrugged. “I’ve seen your mother in a bathing suit,” he said, “and she don’t look half bad.”

  “That’s enough, you big oaf!” snapped Queenie. “You can flirt with me all you like, but how dare you flirt with my mother!” She stuck her nose in the air and stalked off.

  Too-Tall looked puzzled. “Hey, what gives, Queen? Your mother ain’t even here!” He looked at his gang. “What was I supposed to say? That her mother’s ugly?”

  “No, boss,” said Vinnie.

  “Of course not,” said Smirk.

  “She’s just a fickle girl,” added Skuzz.

  “Skuzz, dear,” said Bonnie Brown, “a guy who can’t pronounce ‘coed’ shouldn’t use big words like ‘fickle.’”

  “Hey,” said Too-Tall, “if I’d thought this pool thing would start a spat like this, I wouldn’t have brought it up in the first place.”

  Now Queenie came slinking back. “I’m sorry, Big Guy,” she cooed. “I know you didn’t mean it. So, who’s gonna be the swimming teacher?”

  “Now I ain’t tellin’ ya,” said Too-Tall.

  Queenie grabbed Too-Tall’s left arm and twisted it.

  “Not even if you twist my arm,” said Too-Tall.

  Queenie twisted a little harder, but then stopped because the bell had just rung to start the school day.

  Chapter 2

  “Why, When I Was in School …”

  As usual, Too-Tall turned out to be right. Before classes started, there was a special announcement over the loudspeaker from Mr. Honeycomb, the principal. And it was indeed about the construction of an indoor swimming pool, to be completed in less than two weeks. The announcement closed with some details about swimming classes and tryouts for the new swimming team.

  By the time Brother and Sister got home from school, they were almost talked out about the new pool. But they had enough left to tell Mama and Papa, and also Grizzly Gramps and Grizzly Gran, who had come over for dinner.

  “Hey, guess what?” cried Sister as she and Brother burst into the family room, where the grown-ups were chatting.

  “Haven’t the faintest idea,” said Gramps, with a wink at Gran.

  “Me neither,” said Gran, with a wink at Mama.

  “I’ll take a crack at it,” said Papa, looking up from the afternoon newspaper. “Bear Country School is going to have a swimming pool.”

  “How did you know?” said Brother.

  “Says so right here in the Beartown Gazette,” said Papa. He read: “‘Bear Country School’s new swimming pool will be finished soon. Coed swim classes will be taught by Mr. Mervyn Grizzmeyer, who will also coach the new swimming team.’”

  Mervyn “Bullhorn” Grizzmeyer was the school’s vice principal and general sports coach. He was nicknamed Bullhorn because he didn’t need one.

  “Merv’ll be a great swimming coach,” said Gramps.

  “Gee, I don’t know about that,” said Sister.

  “Why not?” asked Mama. “What’s wrong with Mr. Grizzmeyer?”

  “I just can’t get used to the idea of Mr. G in a bathing suit,” said Sister. “He’s not exactly the male model type.”

  “That’s because he’s not a male model,” said Papa. “He’s a vice principal and a coach. Heck, if that’s your only complaint, I’d say things look pretty rosy.”

  “Well, there is one other thing …,” said Sister.

  “What’s that?” said Papa.

  Sister seemed embarrassed to tell them. So Brother did it for her. “All the girls are upset because we have to wear school-issue black bathing suits,” he said.

  “Oh, my goodness! What a disaster!” said Papa in a sarcastic voice. “What do you think they’re running over there—a country club? Why, when I was in school, we were l
ucky to have running water!”

  “And when I was in school,” said Gramps, “we were lucky to have indoor plumbing!”

  “Sister, I should think you’d be more concerned about making the team than about your bathing suit,” scolded Papa.

  “Sis?” said Brother. “On the swimming team?”

  “Why not?” said Papa. “Last summer, if I remember correctly, she turned herself into a pretty good little swimmer.”

  “Pretty good?” said Sister. “Little?”

  “It’s just an expression, dear,” said Mama.

  “Papa knows you’re a big girl and an excellent swimmer.”

  “Oh, come off it,” said Brother. “No offense, Sis, but you’re younger and smaller than all the other cubs who’ll be trying out for the team. Let’s see now—I’ll make the team for my crawl, Cousin Fred will make it for his backstroke, Queenie for her butterfly, and Bonnie for her breaststroke. Unless, that is, Too-Tall and the gang beat us all out.”

  “You mean,” said Sister, “unless I beat you all out.”

  Brother looked at Sister in mock amazement. Then he threw his head back and laughed. It wasn’t a real, spontaneous laugh. It was a fake laugh, designed to make Sister feel ridiculous.

  “All right, Brother,” said Mama, “that’ll be enough of that. You cubs come help me and Gran get dinner ready. The men can set the dining room table later.”

  “And do the dishes,” added Gran.

  “I’ll dry!” said Gramps before Papa could.

  Chapter 3

  Breaking In the Pool

  Quicker than you can say “butterfly stroke,” the new pool was finished. Teacher Bob’s class had the honor of breaking it in. But there was a big downside to this honor: it meant they were scheduled for swimming class during the day’s first period. Fall was moving on toward winter, and it wasn’t exactly the most pleasant thing in the world to go straight from the nippy morning air to the even nippier morning pool water. Changing into their bathing suits so early in the morning was bad enough, but on the way from the locker rooms to the pool, the cubs had to walk through an ankle-deep chemical bath to clean their feet. And the chemical bath was even colder than the pool water. So by the time they got to the pool, they were all shivering. A few couldn’t keep their teeth from chattering.

  Mr. Grizzmeyer had the cubs sit on the benches that lined the walls on either side of the pool, boys on one side and girls on the other. Some of the girls couldn’t help giggling at the sight of their vice principal in a bathing suit.

  “Care to share what’s so funny with the rest of us?” said Mr. Grizzmeyer.

  “We weren’t giggling,” said Queenie quickly. “We were—er, whimpering. Yeah, that’s it—’cause it’s so cold in here!”

  “The only thing worse than giggling in swimming class is whimpering,” Mr. Grizzmeyer said sternly. “I’ll have no more of it. Now, line up at poolside, boys facing girls. We’re going to start off with a simple dive and a lap back and forth across the pool. You can use any stroke you want. Boys first. Oh, I almost forgot: is there anyone here who can’t swim?”

  No one answered.

  “Okay, boys,” said Mr. Grizzmeyer. “On the count of three, dive in. One … two … three!”

  The boys dived into the water and headed across the pool, some using the crawl, others using the backstroke or the sidestroke. All except for Vinnie, one of Too-Tall’s gang members. He was still poised for his dive when most of the other cubs had half finished their laps.

  “Let’s go, Vinnie!” barked Mr. Grizzmeyer. “We haven’t got all day!”

  Vinnie made an awkward dive. But when he came up, all he did was wave his arms and slap at the water.

  “What stroke is Vinnie using?” Brother asked Fred as they climbed out of the pool at the end of their lap.

  “I think it’s called the flail,” cracked Fred.

  “Hey!” said Brother. “He’s not swimming, he’s drowning!”

  Even as Brother spoke, Mr. Grizzmeyer was swimming toward Vinnie with strong, sure strokes. Within seconds, he hauled the shaken cub to safety. The entire class applauded the rescue, except for Too-Tall, Skuzz, and Smirk, who still hadn’t finished their laps. It looked as if the Too-Tall gang weren’t going to be the stars of the swimming team after all.

  “Vinnie, you nitwit!” roared Mr. Grizzmeyer. “I just asked if anyone here can’t swim! Why didn’t you speak up?”

  Vinnie sat at the edge of the pool, gasping for air. “I … I wasn’t sure … if I could swim or not,” he said between gasps.

  “Why the heck not?” said Mr. Grizzmeyer.

  “Because I never tried,” said Vinnie.

  Mr. Grizzmeyer rolled his eyes as the whole class burst into laughter. “Vinnie, you’re dismissed from class,” said Mr. Grizzmeyer. “I’ll sign you up for after-school swimming instruction. When you catch your breath, get dressed and report back to Teacher Bob.”

  The rest of class went swimmingly, so to speak. Except for two glitches. Both came during the free time at the end of the period. The first was when Bertha Broom did a belly flop off the low diving board. (No one was allowed on the high dive yet, and certainly not for belly flops.) She hit the surface like a ton of bricks and knocked so much water out of the pool that Mr. Grizzmeyer had to add some before the next class.

  The second glitch came while Barry Bruin was treading water in the deep end. Too-Tall sneaked up underneath him and yanked his bathing suit off. Before Barry could snatch it back, Too-Tall rolled it into a ball and threw it into the stands. The class laughed hysterically.

  Mr. Grizzmeyer ordered Too-Tall to climb into the stands to retrieve Barry’s bathing suit, then kicked him out of class. “Go to my office and wait for me!” he said.

  “Mr. G?” said Too-Tall. “Can I stop at my locker on the way to get my Game Bear?”

  “What do you think my office is?” growled Mr. Grizzmeyer. “An entertainment center?”

  Too-Tall shrugged. “Can’t blame a guy for tryin’,” he said. And off he strutted, with a wave to his snickering gang.

  Chapter 4

  Tryouts

  The next day after school, cubs gathered at the pool for swimming team tryouts. This time the boys and girls weren’t separated. Mr. Grizzmeyer wasn’t present yet, so they sat wherever they liked on either bench. Bonnie Brown sat with her best friend, Brother Bear.

  “Oh, look,” said Bonnie, nodding at the bench on the opposite side of the pool. “It’s your little sister and her friend Lizzy Bruin. Aren’t they kind of young to be trying out for the team?”

  “Tell me about it,” said Brother. “It’s all my dad’s fault.”

  “How’s that?” said Bonnie.

  “He pushed her to try out,” said Brother. “He pumped up her ego like crazy, and of course Mama agreed with him to spare Sis’s feelings.”

  “Uh-oh,” said Bonnie. “I’m afraid she’s in for a disappointment.”

  “In a way, it’s my fault, too,” Brother admitted. “When she took Papa’s bait about trying out, I teased her. I thought that might stop her, but it boomeranged.”

  “How do you mean?” asked Bonnie.

  “Teasing her just made her more determined to try out,” said Brother. “You know, to prove me wrong. I’ll bet she and Lizzy finish so far behind everybody else that they get laughed at. She’s gonna wind up in tears. Hey, where’s our coach, anyway?”

  As if on cue, Mr. Grizzmeyer emerged from his private locker room and strode to poolside. As he surveyed the collection of would-be team members, his gaze came to rest on one cub in particular.

  “Too-Tall,” he said, “what do you call those things on your feet?”

  Some of the cubs snickered.

  “Things?” said Too-Tall. “What things?” He looked down. “Oh, those things. They’re flippers.”

  Mr. Grizzmeyer shook his head. “No flippers in tryouts,” he said.

  Too-Tall pretended to look shocked. “No flippers?” he said. “Why not, Co
ach?”

  “They’ll give you an unfair advantage over the other cubs,” said Mr. Grizzmeyer.

  “I don’t see why it’s unfair,” said Too-Tall.

  “If the rest of these clowns had any brains, they would have worn flippers, too.”

  “Get rid of ’em,” said Mr. Grizzmeyer. “End of discussion.”

  Too-Tall took off his flippers and slid them under the bench.

  “All right, cubs,” said the coach. “Tryouts for the swimming team will now begin.” He held up a stopwatch. “I’m going to time you in each event you try out for. You’ll go three at a time, and I’ll get an exact time for the winner in each heat. I can estimate the other swimmers’ times from how far they finish behind the winner. First, freestyle.”

  Brother, Too-Tall, and Skuzz were in the first heat. Though Too-Tall was good at most sports, swimming was clearly not his thing, as he’d shown already in swimming class. Without his flippers, he kept sinking. And Skuzz was even worse. His performance reminded everyone that another name for freestyle is “the crawl.” He was so slow that he indeed looked as if he were crawling through the water. Brother won with ease.

  “Excellent time, Brother,” said Coach Grizzmeyer. “That’ll be hard to beat.”

  And hard to beat it was. By the end of the next-to-last freestyle heat, no one had even come close. And the last heat obviously wouldn’t present much of a challenge to Brother’s time, because only Sister Bear, Lizzy Bruin, and Babs Bruno were left. Sister and Lizzy were both two years younger than Brother, and Babs had never been much of an athlete. In fact, Babs had told Queenie that she was only at tryouts so she could watch the boys race.

  Brother felt a little jittery as his sister took her place at the edge of the pool. He crossed his fingers. He knew Sister wouldn’t get a good time, but at least she might beat Lizzy and Babs.

  Mr. Grizzmeyer counted to three, and off they went. Babs’s dive was more of a fall than a dive, and she went down like a stone. She had to push off the bottom of the pool, and by the time she surfaced, she was already way behind Lizzy. Lizzy, in turn, was already way behind Sister. Not because Lizzy was such a bad swimmer, but because Sister was so good.

 

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