"Merde," he growled when he finally managed to find his voice. Oh no. That pretty much confirmed my suspicions because Merde was roughly translated as ‘Shit.'
“You don’t like it?” I desperately wanted him to like it. The dress and I were already in love, and we just needed someone to side with us. Oh well.
“I could fucking eat you alive in that,” Adie whispered. His eyes were everywhere, and they didn’t seem to be able to get enough of me. Thank God.
“You do like it.” A tentative smile now decorated my features and I twirled around once more for good measure.
"I fucking love it, and everyone else will too. More to the point, I'm really going to enjoy ripping it off you. In fact, it's the only thing I'm going to be able to think about from now on in." That comment made my pulse pound and my face heat. Most of the time, Adie was a jerk, but when he wasn't, he was bloody fantastic.
Watching as he waved the sales lady over, all I heard was rapid-fire French for a moment or two. It was too fast for me to grasp more than the odd word or two, especially as they were using a lot of slang, so when they’d finished, I asked Adie to translate for me.
Adie blew out a long sigh. “I’m not really sure I should, but the gist of it was that I’m a really lucky man, and I confess I’m feeling quite lucky at the minute. We also discussed underwear, as you’ll need some to go under that dress.”
“If you think you’re picking my underwear,” I began warningly.
"Relax. She's going to bring you a selection to choose from when you go back to the changing room. Think of my blood pressure and aging heart health when you decide which set to choose, won't you?" He blew me a kiss, and all of a sudden, I was being led back to the black velvet curtains, where a world of lingerie awaited me.
The sales lady indicated the vast array of underwear that was now spread all around me with a delicate flourish and said, "What takes your fancy?" My eyes goggled. Everything was in black, I guess, so at least I didn't have to choose a colour. My main choices were basque, panties, and suspenders, or strapless bra, panties, and suspenders. Clearly, the French had a thing for stockings, or the sales lady was looking out for Adie. I wasn't sure which. In the end, I settled on a basque that was mostly transparent, with three-quarter cups that weren't going to hide an awful lot of me. I figured if I was going all-out, I might as well go the whole hog. The suspenders matched, of course, with a good five inches of lace topping them. The belt was a flimsy little thing made of fluff, mostly, but it would hopefully do the job.
"An excellent choice, Madame." The sales lady nodded her approval and then began to help me out of my monster dress. In a matter of minutes, I had gained a massive designer bag on my shoulders and was walking arm and arm down the Pont Lafayette with Adie, who currently had the biggest smile on his face you could imagine.
When we got back to our hotel, James was waiting for us.
“Did you want to see the dress?” My face was flushed pink from the long walk back, and I was happier than I had been in days. James looked at me oddly.
"No. I trust that you and Adie made a good decision between you. So, I'll look forward to you surprising me later." James was currently glued to his tablet, scrolling through numerous emails, and he barely looked up at me. My good mood deflated a little.
“Suit yourself. I’ll just hang this beast up before it gets creased,” I said quietly, already backing out of the room.
“Lois, before you go…” James then looked up and beckoned me forward.
“Mmm?” I held my dress bag in front of my stomach protectively, although what I was protecting myself against was unclear to me.
"If everything goes south in the next couple of days and we don't make it out of there alive, are there any arrangements you want made? I know it's something no one wants to talk about, but it's better to be prepared. I can get the details to Sharkey, and she'll sort them out one way or another." He gave me a sombre look.
Well didn't that take the jam out of my donut? To be fair to the man, he had a point. I might have had an afternoon of fun, but it didn't change the fact that my future looked bleak. A wave of guilt came crashing down around me again. What would I do if something happened to either Adie or James? Would I be able to live with myself? Would that even be a problem? Oh, God.
“Don’t look like that, Lois. We all knew what we were getting into when we took this job on. You are not shouldering any responsibility for this. We got in this together, we’ll get out of it together.”
Or we’ll die trying. That was the unspoken elephant in the room. Smiling politely, I nodded. There wasn’t really anything else I could do.
“Are you okay with what’s going to happen tonight?” James searched my eyes, trying to read my response through my expression, but I’d learnt not to give anything away to this man. He wasn’t even getting a blink.
“What girl wouldn’t be okay with two gorgeous men lavishing their attention on her?” I replied.
James grinned. “When both of them are doing it at the same time, there are a few women who might baulk at the thought - some might even be scandalised.” Playful James was back, but I wasn’t in the mood.
"Well, I'm not one of them," I said brightly. I might have been scared witless at the thought of Adie and James both coming at me at once, but I certainly wasn't ‘scandalised' as he'd put it. Besides, much worse had happened at Carte Blanche, but James didn't know about that, thank God. A grey storm cloud flittered across my pale grey eyes before I realised my mistake.
“Talk to me, Lois.” His voice had dropped an octave and was now cajoling. Putting his tablet down on the sofa, he began walking towards me. My initial reaction was to run, but that would give him all the ammunition he needed. Play it cool, Lois.
“Seriously, James, I’m okay with what’s going to happen tonight.” I’d read the brief, over and over again, and just thinking about it made me wet. I wouldn’t have to pretend to find either of them attractive. I found them both panty-melting hot in their own unique ways, and I’m sure they’d use them to their advantage later.
“That’s not what I meant. You’ve not said a word about your time in Carte Blanche, Lois. Do you want to get that off your chest? I know Adie was rough with you, and I suspect there’s plenty more that even he can’t tell me.”
"You and Adie have already discussed what went down?" My throat caught. Had Adie told him everything? For some reason, I really didn't want him to know about my trip to the library with Fabiana, and my first introduction to Geraud Dumortier. There I had met an awful lot of his friends for something that I didn't care to remember. If James knew about it, I would be heading straight back to therapy if I managed to make it through this assignment in one piece.
“I’ve given him a debrief, Lois, yes. I still need yours, though. I’ve taken it easy on you because the heroin completely fucked you up for a few days, but I’m pretty confident you’re almost back to normal now. If you’re not, you need to speak up. We can still delay the session planned this evening. Nothing is set in stone yet.
“No, I’m good.” The last thing I needed was for James to put off this evening’s assignment. Nerves were already driving me crazy. I didn’t want to have sleepless nights over this crap.
“So can we debrief? I have an hour or two to spare.” My blood pressure began to rise. The last thing I needed was a debrief right now. I had no wish to relive the horrors of Carte Blanche just yet.
“Can we leave it until the next assignment’s finished? You know what went on in CB. I’m pretty sure you’ve seen the scars by now.” If I let him think it was about the torture, maybe he would go easy on me.
“Lois, you’re not dealing with this at all, are you? You can’t ignore it. It won’t just go away. You need to talk to somebody. I can’t let you go inside a dungeon if there are all sorts of triggers that are going to set you off. We’re heading into dangerous enough ground as it is.”
“I’ll talk to Adie, then,” I said quietly.
> James nearly exploded. “Lois, Adie was the one that did most of the stuff to you. You can’t talk to him. Please tell me you’re not falling for that bastard. He sleeps with a different woman every day of the week.” For a moment, that comment staggered me. Well, wasn’t that the pot calling the kettle black?
My mouth tightened, and I marched straight up to James and eyeballed him. "Isn't that what you do, over at Elite Encounters?" I couldn't resist the jibe. Both men were highly sexually charged, and if I had any sense, I'd be well advised not to go near either of them.
James closed his eyes and looked exasperated. “Lois, did I have sex with you when you came to visit me?” He had a point. I shook my head. “I don’t sleep with the women there. I’m not a monk before you get any ideas, but neither am I a sex addict.”
“And Adie is?” It sounded a hell of a lot like James was jealous, but that couldn’t be right, could it?
James shoved his hands in his jeans pockets. “I don’t know what Adie is. I’m just telling you to be careful. You’re not in a position to get hurt at the moment. It’ll kill you.” He gave me a piercing look that made my knees wobble. The man almost knew me better than I knew myself.
"If I don't manage to kill myself in the meantime," I added softly. "Perhaps I should just have fun while I can." This time when I turned around, I started walking, and I didn't look back.
Chapter Eighteen – James
I had a suspicious feeling Lois and Adie were holding out on me. Adie had probably told me the least he could get away with regarding the torture aspects of Lois’s treatment, and not a lot more. That meant I had to fill in the gaps. The trouble was, my mind was running riot. There were too many possibilities to consider. The marks on Lois’s body spoke for themselves, but I knew she wouldn’t have got away that easy. They’d have pulled some stunts back there that would stay with her for a while. She’d need help to get past them, one way or another.
That left me with two options: either call a halt to the operation and train someone else up or hope that Lois could live with her demons. I couldn't stomach the thought of putting another operative through Carte Blanche, nor was that even a possibility after what had happened to Lois, so if we had any chance of seeing this through we'd need to get on with things. I'd just have to hope Lois wouldn't crack under the strain. If things went as planned, it shouldn't be a problem. The trouble was, in my line of work, things rarely went to plan.
At precisely nine o'clock that evening, I began to get ready. I would only need half an hour, unlike poor Lois. Just a quick shower, some hair gel, and then I'd don my dinner jacket, which Adie had helpfully picked up earlier. Shrugging my arms into it, I tested it for size. So far, so good. Picking up my bow tie, I ran my fingers across the material. At least Adie had good taste. It was made of butter-soft silk and came with a cummerbund to match. Nice. The last touches were a couple of gold cufflinks that I slotted through my dress shirt, and then all I had to do was put my shoes on. They were so damn shiny I could see my face in them, and there was a good reason for that – they were brand new, too.
Going over the instructions on my iPad one last time, I took a deep breath and prepared myself for this evening’s charade. Right now, I could have murdered a beer, but I didn’t dare touch the stuff. I would need my wits about me, and alcohol would slow me down if things got… interesting. I had enough on my plate without having to deal with that kind of trouble, but it always paid to be prepared.
Speaking of being prepared – I wasn't. The brief I'd received wanted me to break one of my own cardinal rules today, which was never sleep with a colleague. There were a lot of things I was prepared to do for my job, and I've slept with both men and women during the course of duty, but so far I had managed to steer clear of sleeping with anyone that I had to work with. There were a lot of reasons for my rule. It provided too many complications, each operative involved lost focus, if the relationship soured it was a recipe for disaster. Most importantly of all, it gave your enemy leverage over you. I was also forbidden to do so by my employer, although she'd made an exception just this once. They weren't the only reasons, either. For the last few years, I'd avoided ties of all kinds. One night stands were the only thing I would allow myself, and even they didn't hit the spot. The hollow feeling I carried around got worse as the years went on, not better.
The reason I hadn't slept with Lois, though I'd had plenty of occasions to do so, were many and varied. Basically, I knew if I went down that route, I'd have a hard time coming back from it. I'd fallen for her the first day she came into my office at Elite Encounters, all hard edges, and driving ambition. She was a younger version of me. Too smart for her own good, quick, agile, and utterly ruthless. She was also funny, playful, manipulative, and, to add a cherry to her already very impressive cake, utterly beautiful. Normally, I wouldn't go near her. Now, I had no choice in the matter. Somehow I was going to have to emotionally distance myself in order to cope with our stint in Adamantines, but that was going to be difficult. She'd been through too much in the last few weeks for me to treat her with indifference, and that kind of coldness from me could send her spinning. Besides, that wasn't even an option, if I were honest. I already cared far too much about her, and she knew it. Pulling away would hurt me as much as it would her. That wasn't even the worst of it. I was also going be fucking her alongside Adie. My head was going to explode, and I couldn't allow that to happen. I was running this show. You’re going to have to compartmentalise. Take it one step at a time, and go with the flow. Easy to say, not quite so easy to do, in practise. I just had to remember that I’d only get to taste her once. Once I’d touched her, I couldn’t go near her again.
Walking out of my room, I closed the door with a gentle click. My bag was already packed, and I had ten minutes to spare. I figured I’d grab a glass of water and try to clear my head.
“Holy fuck.” Lois was walking toward me in a dress that screamed elegance and lust both equally loudly, and she looked so damn hot I almost forgot my own name.
“You’re as bad as Adie,” she said, rolling her eyes. “I’m going to take that as a compliment and hope for the best.” Her eyes roved up and down my body, and judging by the way they quickly darkened, I figured she liked what she saw. The feeling was mutual.
“You look fucking incredible. Where did you get that dress?” I whispered.
“You’re asking the wrong person. Adie marched me into the boutiques and did all the small talk. I just had to try them on.”
I had a newfound and grudging respect for Adie. Well, his taste in dresses, if nothing else.
“You blow my mind, Lois.” I walked forward and grasped her hands in mine. “Lois, about tonight…” We needed to clear the air before this went down, and I might not get another chance if his lordship showed up.
“It’s all right. You don’t have to say it. I’ve managed to have sex with people in the past and not dissolve into puddles of mush at their feet. I know that this is a one-off, will-never-happen-again kinda thing, and I’m okay with it. It comes with the territory. You do your thing, I’ll do mine, and we can go our separate ways at the end with a smile on our faces.” The pained grimace on her face belied her answer, but she might have been thinking there was little chance she’d make it out alive, rather than worrying about falling for me. I still wasn’t entirely sure how Lois felt about me. When you put Adie into the midst of things, it made it even more complicated. I didn’t want to consider that she might have feelings for him.
"You don't scrub up too badly yourself, by the way," she said, when I remained silent, probably to soften the blow of her earlier words. Funnily enough, she'd told me exactly what I wanted to hear, except that now I'd heard it, I didn't like it one little bit. Contrary fucking bastard, me.
“Why thank you kindly, Ms Reeves.” I fiddled about with my bowtie and did my best 007 smirk. She laughed.
"I can't tell you how much I'm looking forward to this evening." Adie's door slammed behind us, and he saunt
ered out as if he spent his life in evening dress. Lois's gaze was immediately drawn to him, and another spark of jealousy ignited itself. Get a grip, James. I wasn’t going to stand between those two. If Lois thought she and Adie could put the past behind themselves, then I wished them luck. Yeah, you keep telling yourself that.
Lois sauntered up to Adie and gave him a sly glance. She then bent to whisper in his ear. I had no idea what she said, but Adie looked amused.
“You remember that, huh?” Adie tilted his head to one side.
“I’m an elephant. I never forget.” Lois gave him the ‘look.’ It was one I knew well. The ball was in Adie’s court.
“Spill. What are you two talking about?” I was already pretty sure I’d regret asking, but the not knowing was going to kill me.
It was Lois who took pity on me. Turning around, she smoothed the bright red, satin folds of her dress, and then looked up at me. “When I first met Adie, way back at the auction, his interview was rather brutal. It ended with me naked and on my back, strapped to a spanking bench, with my legs spread wide. At the five minutes to go marker, Adie had a thick leather belt in his hands. As you would expect, I began pleading for mercy.” Lois turned back towards Adie.
“And did she get any?” I already knew the answer to that question, but I had to ask.
Adie snorted. “Of course not. She wanted to know why we couldn’t have sex instead, and I told her that I didn’t have sex with slaves until they’d proved themselves. My exact words were ‘It's a long and lengthy process, and few have the stamina or mindset to make the grade.’ Lois was just asking me whether she’d proved herself, or whether I was just following orders.”
"And what was your answer?" I was playing right into his hands, and I didn't care. The sooner I got Lois out of my life, the better. The woman was beginning to make me lose all perspective, and that couldn't be a good thing.
Flames (A Special Agent Novel Book 3) Page 18