“Nay, Mother. She is naïve, daft, and impulsive. She will get herself killed and I will not allow that to happen. Better she be alive and angry with me, than dead and love me,” he said and stormed out of the room.
Connor needed a good fight and he set out to make sure his men were trained well and hard today.
*****
Maddie was still sleeping when Connor came into the room in the evening. He came over to the bed and looked at her. He saw her eyes a little swollen and he figured she had cried herself to sleep.
Connor hardened himself. Damn it, he wouldn’t allow her to disregard her safety and he didn’t care what the cost would be. It was better that she hate him and live, than love him and die.
“Madeleine, wake up,” he said from the foot of the bed.
As she stirred awake and stretched, his passion ignited.
“I want ye downstairs. Supper will be served,” he said without emotion.
Maddie looked up at him. Her sad golden eyes were fast replaced by blazing gilded daggers.
“As you wish, milord,” she said and got up.
Connor studied her a long minute and walked out of the room.
Maddie quickly changed clothes and went downstairs. She would follow his directions as perfectly as possible. Aye, she would kill him with kindness.
Maddie descended the stairs, and as she approached the table she saw that everyone was already seated.
“I apologize for my tardiness. Thank you for waiting.”
“Doona keep us waiting again, Madeleine.”
Everyone was clearly stunned at his cold attitude. They were anticipating the fireworks, but were disappointed.
“As you wish, milord. My apologies again,” Maddie said, and sat next to Connor. Connor nodded, appeased.
It was nice to have her cooperation for once.
Everyone’s eyes opened wide, but they remained quiet.
“Madeleine, ye serve yerself too little. Ye must eat more. Ye are too thin,” he instructed, and placed more stew on her trencher.
“As you wish,” she said, and continued to eat after he placed more food on her plate.
The dinner table was quiet that evening. Once Maddie was finished, she requested to leave the table.
“May I be excused? I would like to sew by the hearth.”
“Aye, but not for too long. Ye need yer rest,” Connor instructed. All eyes were on him.
“Thank you. If you’ll excuse me,” Maddie said and went to grab her plate.
“The servants will see to that,” Connor said, staying her hand with his. She nodded and went to the hearth. She picked up her sewing project and sat in the chair.
At the table, everyone stared at Connor. Their stares weren’t ones of adoration, either. They were glowering with notes of hostility.
“Quit yer scowls, and save yer lectures. I am a married man and my wife is my affair. She’s no one else’s.”
Miriam threw her cloth napkin on the table, glared at Connor, and left the table without a word. Katie did the same.
“Anyone else want to leave?” Connor asked, raising an eyebrow. “Ye’re free to go.”
They continued to glare at him but remained silently eating.
“We need to meet after the meal. We’ve things to discuss.” Connor rose, and stepped away from the table.
“It’s going to be a long night,” Kiel said and the others nodded.
*****
In the meeting, Connor explained that he would be leaving to the Kerrs. He would be taking Iain, Kiel, and Hugh. Kirk and Bruce would stay behind.
“Why are we going to the Kerrs?” Kiel asked.
“I really am questioned about every decision I make. Has Madeleine had this horrible effect on all of ye?”
Silence and glares were his only responses.
“Athyn. He and I have have an interesting and complicated history, but nevertheless, they helped the day Binouix took Maddie,” Connor said.
“Maddie? So now it’s back to calling her Maddie instead of Madeleine,” Malcolm said.
“Spare me the lecture, Father,” Connor said dryly.
“What in the world has gotten into ye, Connor? Ye’re becoming every bit of the disgruntled man that ye were before Maddie came here,” Malcolm asked.
“Any concerns about tomorrow?” Connor asked, ignoring the question. When they remained silent, he said, “Fine. We leave at dawn.” Connor stood to leave.
“There is one more question. Are ye going to tell Maddie that ye’re leaving?” Iain asked.
“That is none of yer concern, Iain, but the answer is no,” Connor responded aloofly and left the room.
“He’s verra much in love with her,” Malcolm stated and snickered from the irony of the situation.
“Then why is he acting like a bastard, Father?” Iain asked, sourly.
“Aye, he’ll kill the love Maddie has for him,” Kiel added.
Malcolm shook his head.
“He finally realizes how fragile life is. He now sees that Maddie can be easily taken away from him, especially after the Binouix incident, and he loves her so much so that it scares him. He is afraid to lose her and he’s afraid of the magnitude of his emotions. Things will settle in time. Aye,” Malcolm said, and laughed heartily this time, “the role of the docile, obedient wife is not one that Maddie will play for any length of time, nor is it one that Connor will like overly much. Although he willna admit it, he likes arguing with her. In terms of his acting the part of the cold, demanding husband, while Connor relishes in it now, it will ultimately rub Maddie the wrong way, shaking her out of her new obedient role.”
The men shared a laugh.
“Aye. It will be an interesting time here at Keisealle. Sparks aplenty.”
*****
Connor went to the great room and was satisfied to see that Maddie had followed his directions. She wasn’t there, which meant she had to be up in their chambers. He had actually still expected a battle. Maddie was learning and that’s what mattered. Her following his instructions would ensure that she would remain alive and by his side.
He entered into the chamber and found Maddie still sewing by candlelight. She stood up as he came to stand before her.
“I asked ye to sew only for awhile and sleep afterwards,” he said looking down at her.
She was wearing a thin, shear shift, and looked delectable. Her hair cascaded down all around her. The dark strands reflected the light from the fireplace and candles. Her eyes sparkled with golden drops of liquid.
Connor was powerless. He kissed her.
It was almost savage.
Maddie met his kiss with her own passion, her nails biting into his back. His right hand swooped to her hair and grabbed a fistful of it as his other hand played with her nipples. She moaned and it drove him crazy.
It wouldn’t be slow tonight. Nay, he was too crazed.
Connor took off her shift and placed her on the bed. He quickly took off his clothes and came down on her. Connor licked her nipples and sucked on her breasts. Her nails digging into his back drove him to distraction. He groaned. Connor grabbed her backside pulled her forward and entered her in one swift thrust. She let out a moan of pleasure and he grunted.
He wasn’t gentle. He thrust into her as if he only had seconds to live. Connor shouted out in pleasure. She was so hot and tight. Maddie’s moans resounded in his head, driving him further mad.
“Connor! More…give me more…please…” she said, her voice sounding as if it were far away.
At her words, something in him snapped. He drove into her harder, withdrawing and plunging in. Their lovemaking grew wild and savage. He was a primal beast mating with his female. No thoughts hindered them. Their hunger took them over.
Connor kissed her breasts. Maddie sunk her nails deeper into his back as if she feared he’d leave. She held him down to her. Connor grabbed her backside again, anchoring her firmer, and drove into her. She grabbed his shoulders, arched her back, and cried out.
>
“Connor!”
“Yes, Maddie. Join me, my love,” he said through clenched teeth as he pushed them to fulfillment.
Maddie cried out in pleasure. She gripped his shoulders and hugged him tightly as the waves of ecstasy consumed her. She chanted his name like a prayer.
Connor roared as he felt his seed shoot into his wife. She squeezed him like a vice. He felt every constriction of her passage as it milked him. He bellowed again in ecstasy, feeling power surge in his veins with every pump of his seed. His lungs weren’t able to take in enough air, but he didn’t care. Sweat covered both of them. He collapsed on her as he tried to control his breathing. The lovemaking had left him spent but peace had descended in him. Long moments passed before Connor lifted his head from the curve of her delicious neck.
His sweet wife had fallen asleep. She looked so young, delicate, naïve, and incredibly intoxicating. He was eight years older than she was, but was a hundred years more worldly. He knew the bad out there, the pure evil that existed, and she only knew and saw the good. Connor needed to protect her from all of that, even if she hated him for it.
He stretched out next to her and pulled her to him. Her lips were swollen, her skin was pink from exertion, and her breasts were red from his loving. Maddie looked misused and he felt an immediate pang of guilt.
Would she forgive him for the savage lovemaking? For treating her coldly?
He hugged her to him tighter.
She had to forgive him. Knowing her sweet nature and heart, she would.
The only problem was, could he forgive himself?
Chapter Twenty-Six
Connor woke up before dawn and dressed. He went to the door, looked back at his wife, and walked over to the bed again. He leaned down, and gave her a kiss on her forehead and her lips. He brushed a lock of hair from her face. Connor walked to the door, and with one last look to hold him over, he left their chamber.
Maddie awoke in the morning alone. She remembered the night before and smiled. Their lovemaking had been rough, but she’d enjoyed it. Had he? Connor seemed to have liked it, too.
It had been over two months since they’d married. Until recently, their union had been wonderful, but now he wanted an obedient wife.
Maddie wasn’t what he wanted anymore.
Tears sprang to her eyes. Her stomach lurched and she ran to the chamber pot. She hunched over as she released the bile from her stomach. Once done, she stood up and was dizzy. She held on to the bed’s post and sat down.
Could she be coming down with something? Nay. She knew what the cause was. Connor was losing interest in her. She wasn’t living up to his expectations. He was disappointed in her. Maddie was sickened with the thought that he might leave their bed and go to another’s.
At first she wanted to kill him with kindness, but now, she just wanted him to love her as he had in the beginning.
Her stomach lurched again.
She would change.
She had to.
She wanted her husband to love her again.
*****
“The inconsiderate louse!” she mumbled to herself when she found out that Connor had left without telling her anything.
No, she wouldn’t get angry. She needed to change her attitude. She needed to change herself so that he’d love her, and he wouldn’t be disappointed in her anymore.
She would change.
Two weeks passed without his return, and during that time she ate more, worked less, and sewed until her fingers hurt. Connor said over and over again that she was too thin. She tried hard to open her appetite and even the family was noticing her new hungrier self. When she thought about losing Connor and his disappointment in her, her stomach would lurch and she would empty her tummy. She worried so much, she grew dizzy at times.
Maddie spent more time with the children. She didn’t give that up, and she wouldn’t either. She would tell them stories, put on plays, and play games. Katie joined as well. The days were long and the nights were longer as she waited for Connor.
Maddie was outside and running around with the children when Connor returned. Her face was flushed and she was sweating. She saw the drawbridge lower and the riders come forth. Connor stood out like a white horse among black. He was massive, handsome, and powerful.
He was staring at her.
To Connor, his Maddie looked gorgeous. To his surprise, she also looked fuller. He dismounted and walked towards her.
“Connor!” she yelled happily, waving as she ran towards him. Happiness bubbled within her and her laughter reached him. Connor smiled in reaction. She was like a breath of fresh air. Lord, how he missed her.
Maddie slowed her sprint and then came to a halt before she reached him. Everything grew quiet around her. The world grew brighter then slowly darker with small stars appearing where her eyes tried to focus. The smile left her face and her hand reached up to her forehead to wipe the sweat. She collapsed on the ground and Connor’s world ceased to exist.
His legs couldn’t take him to her fast enough. He sank down to the grass and turned her over.
“Maddie?” he asked roughly.
No response.
“She’s breathing,” he croaked, more for himself than for those surrounding him.
Connor picked her up and took her up to their room. He wanted answers and he wanted them now. Why had she swooned? It was obvious she had been eating. Was this due to the exertion in the sun?
Esther came in and helped to revive Maddie.
“Connor,” she whispered and smiled as she reached up to cup his face. “I’ve missed you,” she said, tears springing to her eyes.
He was choked with emotion.
“I’ve missed ye, too,” he managed to say.
“I love you,” she said, her eyes growing droopy.
“I love ye,” he murmured and her eyes flew open briefly, before fluttering closed again.
Connor saw the confusion in her brief questioning gaze and wondered from where that had come. He walked over to the anteroom of their chamber and shut the door to the bedroom.
“What has happened since I left?” he asked, his anger apparent. He addressed his family who worriedly waited for him to come out.
“She has been a bundle of nerves. Yer behavior towards her lately is what’s at fault. She sleeps more, eats more, and sews more. Everything ye wanted, she does. She thinks that ye doona love her anymore,” Miriam said heatedly.
“Nonsense. Did she tell ye that?”
“Nay, Connor! But ye’d have to be blind not to know that by her actions. She’s done everything that she’s fought ye over not to do. Everything that ye’ve wanted her to do, she has zealously done,” Miriam said.
“She been aloof,” Malcolm said.
“No. I willna believe it. She knows that I love her,” Connor said, arrogantly.
Miriam had had enough, and said as much when she stormed out of the room. Everyone left after her and Connor returned to Maddie. He took off his clothes and got in the bed with his wife. He brought her into his arms and fell asleep holding her.
Chapter Twenty-Seven
Maddie was driving Connor daft. Again. Anything he requested, she did. There were no more arguments or complaints. The only thing he liked about the new obedient Maddie was that she was finally eating properly and gaining some weight.
Since she’d fainted, it had been the longest, most strained month of his life. The only remnants of her feisty personality came out when they made love at night. Her fire and passion came through then, but when the day came, the quiet and obedient Maddie returned. The last straw occurred on the day Maura caused trouble again.
“Ye threw that leather ball at me!” Maura cried in indignation.
Connor grew incensed. He really needed to take care of Maura for good.
“I did not throw it to you, Maura,” Maddie said calmly as the children skirted behind her. Apparently, the children didn’t like Maura and looked as if they were scared of her.
“Ye d
id! Ye did it on purpose!”
“Nay,” Maddie said and turned to leave.
Maura reached out and turned Maddie roughly back to face her. The gathering crowd made their objections to Maura’s treatment of Maddie known. Some smiled though, in anticipation of the fight starting to brew. They loved to see their mistress argue and put Maura in her place.
“What is it, Maura?” Maddie asked serenely.
Even Maura looked at Maddie oddly.
“Admit it, Madeleine, ye tried to hit me! I want an apology or I shall go to Connor and inform him of yer assault!”
Maddie paled a little. Maura saw that and latched on to the weakness. Maddie’s only thought was that Maura couldn’t go to Connor. He was just beginning to come around and love her again. If he thought she was arguing like she used to, it would ruin everything.
Maddie always did something to destroy the love others had for her. It was her fault her mother died. Her father hated her for that, she was sure. She could never please him no matter what she did. She always disappointed him.
Now, she would be disappointing Connor.
“Nay, Maura. You have my apology. There is no need to bother Connor,” Maddie said quietly.
“Say it louder!”
Maddie’s head snapped up and Connor was growing relieved. Her fire was coming back. In one second his hope rekindled, but it was gone the next.
“I apologize.”
“For what?”
“If I inadvertently hit you with the ball.”
Maddie turned to leave with the children.
“I will tell Connor. Think ye that I doona know ye two are having issues?”
At that statement, Maddie turned around. The worry on her face was evident and in that moment, Connor knew that his mother had been right all along.
His wife feared that he didn’t love her anymore.
Connor felt as if an arrow went through his lungs. His heart seized in pain as he realized that his beautiful wife doubted his love for her.
It both saddened and angered Connor. How could she doubt his feelings for her? Didn’t she know that everything he did was for her? The more he thought about it, though, he knew he was the cause. In his aim to protect her, he had given her the wrong idea.
The Highlander Who Saved Me (Heart of a Highlander Collection Book 2) Page 19