by Jen Andrews
She hung her head and her shoulders shook as she cried.
“Stop crying, Teagan!” I yelled. Seeing her upset and crying was killing me, but she’d broken my fucking heart, not the other way around. She wasn’t the one who should be upset.
“Jeremy, please, I’ll do anything to get us back to the way we were.”
I wanted that too, but I couldn’t forget the last few months of me sitting around waiting for her to get her shit together.
“Do you have any idea what you’ve done to me? I’ve never had my heart broken in my life until you, Teagan. I sold my damn house because I couldn’t be there without you! How pathetic is that?”
“It’s not, Jeremy. I’m so sorry for everything I’ve done to hurt you, but if you give me a chance, I’d like to explain. I’ve done a lot of thinking lately, especially since Nanna died. Please talk to me. I still want her to be right about us. I need her to be right. I still love y—”
“Stop! Don’t fucking say it! You’re not allowed to say that to me, Teagan. Not anymore.”
She covered her mouth with her hand and stepped back as if I’d slapped her. Her eyes welled up with tears again, and she took a deep breath after letting her hand drop to her side.
But she didn’t give up.
“Please . . . please, forgive me. Please talk to me. That’s all I’m asking, Jeremy. If you don’t like what I have to say, I’ll leave and never bother you again.”
Tears trickled down her pretty face as I stood and stared at her. “I’m sorry Teagan, but I can’t forget what you’ve done to me for the past few months. All this started with me punishing myself over what Cammie did to us, and even though you know what really happened, you continued to punish me by stringing me along.”
“Jeremy, please,” she cried and attempted to reach out for me.
“Teagan if you want to speak to me, you need to give me time, now. You and Zoey springing this date shit on me was a bad idea. I’ll call you when I’m ready to talk. Please leave.”
Not waiting to see what she was going to do, I turned and went inside my apartment and locked the door. I shut off all the lights and went to bed.
After an hour or so, my cell phone rang. It was Zoey. I ignored her call and the ten others after that. My cell rang again, this time it was Andy, so I answered.
“What?” I growled into the phone.
“Look, I know you don’t want to talk to your sister right now, but she was calling you for a good reason.”
“You’re right, I’m pissed at her. What does she want?”
Andy sighed. “I understand, but are you aware that Teagan is outside your door?”
What the hell? “No, what is she doing?”
“Jeremy, just go and get her. It’s cold outside.”
After we hung up, I pulled on my jeans, shirt, and shoes. When I opened my front door I found Teagan curled up on the welcome mat on the landing. She’d pulled her legs up under her knee-length dress in an attempt to keep warm.
“Teagan, what are you doing? You’re going to freeze out here.” She was wearing only a thin dress and the spring evenings in Northern California were still cool when the sun went down.
“I’m not running away anymore. Not from you, not from anything,” she said quietly, without moving to get up.
She was shaking, so I knew she was cold. I jogged to my bedroom and pulled a hoody from my closet. When I went back to the door, she was sitting up with her arms wrapped around herself trying to get warm. I sat down next to her and pulled the hoody over her head. As she slipped her arms into the sleeves, I brushed her hair away from her face.
My fingers grazed her skin and our connection was there, stronger than ever. And just like the first time I touched her, my heart stopped. I lifted her onto my lap and held her tightly to warm her up. I wanted to take her inside, but I couldn’t. I needed her to leave. If I let her inside, all I would see is her, like I did at my house.
“Teagan, you need to go home. Give me some time to think about this, please.”
She nodded hesitantly and stood. I followed her out to the street and she walked up to the red Cruze outside Z’s apartment.
“You bought a new car.”
“Yeah, my Neon, uh, bit the dust last week. I used the money Nanna left me to pay for it. Do you like it?”
“It suits you, Red. Now, get out of here. I’ll call you, I promise.”
“I’m really sorry about tonight, Jeremy. I didn’t mean to make you mad,” she said as her bottom lip quivered.
I hugged her then let her go. She got into her new car and left.
I hopped into my car and went straight to Sam’s bar.
A week had passed since Zoey had set us up, and Jeremy still hadn’t called yet. Now, I regretted every single second of time I’d asked him to give me, and every single second we’d spent apart. Because of those seconds, I feared I had lost him for good. I can’t lose him . . . he’s everything to me. Why had I been so stupid and horrible to him?
While I’d been doing everything behind the scenes to get him back, he’d been drifting further away. But, I hadn’t been able to let him know what I was doing because I needed to prove to him how much I loved him. The only way I’d known how to do that was to set up our future for us, and pray he’d want it too.
So I’d bought his house.
I’d bought his freaking house!
Our house.
The morning of the open house, Nanna’s will had been read. She’d left each of her five grandchildren twenty-five thousand dollars. She left Jeremy her Yeats book, per Rose’s instructions, and because of the book, I’d gone to see him and found his house for sale.
When I’d met with Zoey at Rico’s, she told me her deal with Jeremy about selling it to the first person who offered him what he owed. My heart had broken knowing he’d just wanted to be rid of it.
Zoey had honored Jeremy’s wishes about taking only what was owed on the house for me because she wanted us to be back together as much as I did.
I’d used the money from Eloise for my down payment on the house, and banked the money from Nanna. Luckily I had, because my poor Neon had finally died.
Well, technically, someone had killed it when it had been parked at the grocery store. Somebody had hit the gas pedal instead of the brake pedal on their car and crushed my poor Neon between their car and a big truck. The insurance company had written my old Neon off as totaled, so I had been forced to buy a new car.
Now I had a new house and a new car, but no Jeremy.
He was the one thing I couldn’t do without.
As soon as I was allowed to, I moved into Jeremy’s house. I had since gotten over everything Cammie had done and I slept in Jeremy’s bed every night.
Now all I needed was for him to come home. But he hadn’t called. I knew he’d gone out on a date with someone Nicole had set him up with, but I also knew it hadn’t worked out. They were still friends though and frequently spent time together.
I needed him back and didn’t want to wait anymore, even though I knew I’d put him through hell waiting for me.
Screw this waiting crap! It sucks. No wonder he’s so angry with me.
Tonight was fight night at Dub’s. I didn’t know if he was going, but I had to make a move before I lost him completely. All the guys had finally come around about Sonny and Reese, and were going to fight nights together again. If I called Reese or Sonny while they were at Dub’s, they would probably out me as soon as they answered their phone, so I picked up my cell and called John.
“Yep,” he said as a greeting.
God, he was so predictable and exactly the reason I’d called him over anyone else.
“John, it’s Teagan. Is Jeremy with you?”
“Yep.”
“Is he by himself?”
“Yep.”
Good, he didn’t bring his new friend.
“John, I am coming to see him, don’t tell anyone.”
“Yep.”
“John
, do you know any other word than yep?”
“Yep.”
“Bye, John.”
“Yep.”
What a tool!
After my call, I drove like a crazy woman to Dub’s.
Everyone was sitting at their usual couch watching the fight when I entered the TV room. I was nervous to be there, and had no idea what my plan was. Reese spotted me and grinned. He sneakily elbowed Sonny and a smile grew on his face as well. They knew exactly why I was here.
I had put Jeremy through hell, and my mission tonight was to make it right and show him we belonged together.
Taking a deep breath, I held it then slowly let it out. I walked over, stopping directly in front of him. I lowered myself to my knees and stared at his Sinatra-blue eyes.
A smile touched his lips, and he tilted his head to the side, curious as to what I was doing.
“Hi,” I said quietly, as I rested my hands on his knees. My heart felt like it was going to beat out of my chest.
He placed his hands on top of mine and for a brief second, I thought he was going to push them away, but he didn’t.
“Hi, pretty girl. Whatcha doing here?”
His using my nickname for me made me smile. Good sign? I hope so.
Glancing over at his friends, I found them observing us. While Reese and Sonny knew I’d bought his house, nobody else did. They were all watching and waiting for me to make my next move.
Thinking back to all the times Jeremy had hauled me out of here over his shoulder gave me an idea.
Here goes. “Jeremy, I have a proposition for you.”
His eyebrows rose and his hands moved, lightly massaging the tops of mine.
“I want you to come home with me so we can talk,” I said.
“What if I have nothing to say to you yet?”
My stomach clenched. He was going to make this hard on me. Quite rightly. I’d gladly accept everything he might do or say to me, because I was so, so wrong about how I’d handled things with him.
“Please, Jeremy. I’m done running. I swear it. If you come and talk to me we can work this out.”
His expression softened, so I stood and pulled his hands to see if he would stand too. He didn’t, but kept hold of my hands. I stared at him, trying to figure out what he was thinking. His face remained the same, so I decided to use his own tactics against him.
“We can do this the easy way, or the hard way, Jeremy. You decide.”
A smile eased over his face, and he laughed. He rose from his seat, challenging me. “What are you gonna do, Red? Toss me over your shoulder and haul my ass outta here?”
“If I have to,” I countered and raised my chin defiantly.
He let go of my hands and lifted his arms out to his sides, as if to say ‘bring it on.’
So I did.
I bent over, wrapped my arms around his thighs, and tried to lift him over my shoulder. Yeah, it didn’t work and everyone laughed at me. I took a step back and blew my hair away from my face in frustration.
Now what?
Jeremy crossed his arms over his chest and stared at me, waiting for my next move. I froze. I had no idea what to do. We stared at each other for a moment before his arms dropped and he walked away. I followed him.
“Where are you going?” I asked when I caught up to him.
He laughed. “Since the hard way didn’t work, I thought I’d let you off the hook and do it the easy way.”
He’s coming with me?
“You’re coming with me?” I asked, surprised.
“What do I have to lose, Red? I can’t lose you again since I don’t have you.”
He pushed the door open and headed for the parking lot. Jeremy walked straight over to my car and stood at the passenger door.
I pressed the button on my key fob to unlock the doors and he got in the car. When I reached down to pull open my door, he hit the lock button.
I doubled over in laughter then glared at him through the window only to find him smiling at me. “Okay, wiseass, you paid me back.” I hit the unlock button again and reached for the door handle.
Jeremy locked me out again.
“Jeremy James! Quit being a shit!” I yelled from outside my own car.
He hit the lock button again, unlocking the doors.
I opened the door and got in. “Alright, I know I deserved that, but are you going to give me crap all night?”
“Maybe,” he said, grinning. God, I loved his smile.
“What happened to your Neon?”
“It was totaled,” I said, pulling out of the parking lot.
His head whipped toward me, a worried expression on his face. “Were you hurt?”
“I wasn’t inside it when it happened,” I said, then went on to explain how it had met its demise.
Jeremy reached over and took my hand, interlacing our fingers. “I’m glad you weren’t hurt, Teagan.”
I had a hard time containing my emotions when he took my hand, and a tear rolled down my cheek. I was slightly overwhelmed now, because when I’d gone to Dub’s, I’d truly thought I would be going home alone.
Crap! How was I going to tell him I’d bought his house? Think Teagan. Think!
“Jeremy, do you trust me?”
“Do you want me to?”
“Yes, I do, but I’ll understand if you don’t.”
“I want to, but you haven’t made it easy on me, Red.”
“I’m so sorry . . . about everything. But I need to tell you something important, and I’m not sure how you’re going to take it. Everything I’ve done is because I love you and want us to be together. I want back everything we had. All of it, and I hope you do too.”
“What have you done?”
“If it’s okay with you, I’d rather show you.” I glanced over at him and took a deep breath.
“Fine.”
The closer I drove toward the house, the more nervous I became.
“Teagan, where are you taking me?”
Crap!
I didn’t answer him.
“Teagan . . .”
At every stop sign, I did a California stop. I had learned from the master on how to execute a perfect one, and right now, they were coming in handy.
“Are we going to your parents’ house?”
I didn’t answer because we were approaching the street where his . . . my . . . hopefully our house was. Right at the last second, I slammed on the brakes and made a sharp right turn on to my street. Halfway down the block, I hit the button on the garage door opener, and hoped we were close enough for it to open.
I pulled into the driveway as the garage door finished lifting. I brought my car to a screeching stop inside the garage and hit the button to close the door.
“What’s going on?” Jeremy asked, staring over at me in complete confusion.
Cringing, I closed my eyes and took a breath. “I bought your house.” I let the breath out.
“I’m sorry, what? I swear you just said you bought my house.”
“You heard me correctly, Jeremy. I bought your house. Because I love you and I want to be with you, here . . . in our home.”
There, I’d said it. It was all out in the open. Well, what I wanted was out in the open. I still didn’t know if he’d take me back.
“You bought my house?”
His stare was intense and I couldn’t tell if he was angry along with his surprise, or if he was so shocked, he didn’t know what else to say.
I needed to get him in the house so he would see that I’d changed.
“Will you come inside?” I gathered my purse and pulled the key from the ignition.
“You bought my house . . .”
I laughed and got out of my Cruze. He wasn’t going to come inside on his own, so I went around and opened his door for him. I held my hand out to him and he didn’t hesitate to take it. He stepped out and opened his mouth to speak. Most likely to say, “you bought my house” again.
“Yes, I bought your house, Jeremy. But no
t for me, I bought it for us.”
With his hand in mine, I walked to the door leading to the kitchen. He followed me inside willingly, and looked around. I hadn’t changed a thing inside the house.
Our first stop was the bedroom—the place where everything had gone so wrong and the place where I wanted to start over.
I’d forced myself to sleep in that bedroom without him every night since I’d moved in. The first week had been torture, but eventually I’d gotten over the devastating memory.
I led him to the center of the room, kicked off my shoes, and sat on the bed. “Lie down with me,” I said quietly, taking his hands in mine.
He hesitated and looked away. For a minute, I thought he was angry, but then I realized he was looking around the bedroom, taking in everything. Apparently, he needed to let my news sink in.
After I let his hands go, I turned on my new iPod to the playlist Zoey had made for this moment. I watched Jeremy stroll around the room looking at everything. He even flipped on the light in the bathroom and looked inside.
He opened drawers on the dresser, he looked inside the closet, and then he looked in the nightstands. Amused, I relaxed against the pillows and watched him. When he was satisfied with whatever thoughts he had going through his head, he stepped over to the bed.
“Teagan, I don’t even know what to say,” he said, contemplating me on the bed.
“Will you stay and talk to me?”
He rubbed his hands over his face a few times, and then pushed his fingers through his hair. I missed doing that. I rolled to my side to face him and patted the bed next to me.
“Please?”
Jeremy pulled off his shoes and crawled onto the bed with me. He propped himself on his elbow and just stared at me.
Instinctively, I reached out and rested my hand on his cheek. “I’ve missed you so much, Jeremy. Will you let me explain why I needed time?”
He pressed his lips to mine unexpectedly then pulled away. He moved closer to me and draped his arm over my side.
“What do you want from me, pretty girl?”
“Everything. I want you to move back here with me. I want you to wake up with me every morning and go running, but most of all . . . I want your forgiveness. Will you ever forgive me, Jeremy? I’m so sorry for stringing you along.”