The joy between them cooled.
“Will and I have not been unhappy,” she said after a moment. “I will not say anything more about it because there is no need. You know the state of our marriage so I will not elaborate, but given the circumstances, I did the best I could, I think.”
That statement set Adria on edge. She’d heard it before. She’d heard Lily explain away the state of her marriage many times before and it had never bothered her until now. Now, she knew why the marriage had gone sour, with poor Will being duped and thinking he was equally to blame in the situation. But he wasn’t. Now, Lily was going to go to her grave with a secret she had kept from her husband all of these years and Adria simply didn’t think it was fair.
Those feelings of being protective over Will were starting to stir. In fact, they were starting to boil over. She couldn’t stand the fact that Lily was going to play the innocent until the end.
When she was anything but innocent.
“Did you?” she muttered before she could stop herself. “Did you really do the best you could?”
Lily’s brow furrowed. “Why would you say that?”
Adria sighed sharply and stopped fussing with the thread. “This morning, I came back up here to retrieve Atticus’ cap because the morning was cold,” she said, lifting accusing eyes to look at Lily. “I was coming up the stairs when I heard voices. I thought it was Will but I realized it was Marcellus.”
She let that hang in the air, watching emotions of shock and fear ripple across Lily’s face. “And?” Lily managed to ask.
“And I heard everything.”
So there it was. Out in the open. Lily and Marcellus’ dark secret, something they’d managed to hide for years was no longer hidden. Someone else knew. Lily swallowed hard, pausing a moment before sliding back on the bed and leaning against the pillows.
She couldn’t even look at Adria.
Now, the woman’s hardness was making some sense.
“I see,” she said, but her voice was shaking. “Did you tell Will?”
That set Adria off. “How can you ask me that?” she hissed. “It is not my secret to tell, Lily. It is your secret that you have kept from him since the beginning of your marriage. It is not my place to say anything but, God knows, you and Marcellus have put on an astonishing act of deceit. I would have never guessed the two of you have been carrying on behind Will’s back for the entirety of the marriage. How could you do such a thing?”
Lily was pale, looking at Adria with an expression of guilt and defiance that had become every line in her face, every pore. She was the living embodiment of the sorrow and rebelliousness she felt.
Her breathing was beginning to quicken.
“I have often asked myself that,” she said, her voice weak. “All I can tell you is that we never meant to be deliberately deceitful. I loved Marcellus before I ever loved Will, but my father forced me to marry Will. Can you not understand that?”
“Nay!” Adria snapped. “I do not understand it. When you marry a man, you vow to be faithful to him. Marriage is about faith and loyalty. I could never understand why you and Will did not have a marriage like others who are fond of one another, and now I know. It was because you loved another man.”
“And he loved me,” Lily said softly. “I am sorry you do not understand what real love is, Adria. Mayhap you will someday.”
It was a rebuke and Adria’s head snapped back as if Lily had reached out and struck her. Astonished at the arrogance, she shook her head in wonder.
“That is the defense of every selfish person,” she said, her voice hoarse. “No one understands you, so you justify your lies and deceit by trying to push the blame on others. Well, there is no blame to cast except on you and Marcellus. Nay, I will not tell Will, but I will not marry him unless you do. I will not let you take that secret to your grave.”
Lily’s eyes filled with tears. “To tell him now would only hurt him.”
“So you will let him live the rest of his life with your lies?” Adria said. “Believing Atticus is his son? Believing the child you carry is his child? Worse still, he believes Marcellus is his friend. Is that fair to Will to let him believe that? You insult him by keeping him ignorant of your truth.”
Lily blinked and tears streamed down her face. “Ignorance will give him peace.”
Adria was infuriated with Lily’s resistance. “What you and Marcellus did is disgusting,” she hissed at her. “You’re both selfish fools. You have been lying to Will and even to me, telling me that you want Will to be happy and your children to be loved. If you loved them the way you think you do, then you never would have done this. But since you have, the least you can do is tell Will everything. If the worst happens and you do not survive, then at least you have gone to your grave with a clear conscience. And at least Will will know the truth and he is not a man who has been lied to by his philandering wife.”
They were such harsh words, but nothing she said was untrue. That was the only thing that kept Lily from flaring at her, but more and more, she was being beaten down by Adria’s rage. She thought the woman was her ally, but she was evidently wrong and that realization was a distinct blow.
Still, Lily was resistant.
“What if there is a miracle, like you’ve said?” she said. “Then I have confessed something that he did not need to know. Our lives will be in chaos.”
“That will be your fault,” Adria said. Lily couldn’t take any more of Adria’s anger and she lowered her head, sobbing softly. Adria watched the woman, struggling to compose herself. “Lily, I am sure Will feels that he is partially to blame for the state of your marriage. How can you let him go through life thinking you are innocent in all of this? How can you do that to him?”
Lily simply shook her head, sobbing into her hand. “I cannot help that Marcellus and I love one another,” she said. “What you have never had, you cannot understand.”
“I understand that what you are doing is wrong.”
“I will not explain myself to you!”
“Then I have nothing more to say to you, either.”
With that, she turned away, preparing to leave, but Lily stopped her. “Wait,” she said, tears and mucus running down her face. “Do not leave, Adie, please. It’s just that… do you know that Marcellus begged my father for my hand but he refused? He wanted to marry me badly, but my father wouldn’t hear of it. He only wanted a de Wolfe. It did not matter what I wanted or what Marcellus wanted. Only my father’s wishes mattered.”
Adria was trying to see her side; she really was. But she simply couldn’t. “I am sorry for you, truly, but poor Will is married to a woman who refused to give up her former lover,” she said quietly. “And she lies to him about it. She bears the children of this man and lets Will believe they are his children. Don’t you see how wrong that is?”
“You do not understand!”
Adria could see that Lily was becoming increasingly worked up, which probably wasn’t good for her. Adria may have been furious, but she wasn’t cruel. She didn’t want Lily to become ill and that was where they were headed.
Perhaps it was time for her to show a little compassion.
With a heavy sigh, she went in search of a bowl and a kerchief. She found the little bowl on the table with a few other things, like cups and knives, and filled it with cool water from the basin. Bringing it back over to the bed, she dipped the kerchief in it and put her hand under Lily’s chin, tilting her head back and wiping her hot, tear-stained face with the cool water.
“Quiet, now,” she said in a low tone. “Quiet yourself and rest. I will say no more about this, but you know how I feel.”
Lily sniffled, letting Adria wipe her face off. “Please do not hate me, Adria,” she said. “I could not bear it if you did.”
Adria put the kerchief back in the bowl. “I do not hate you,” she said. “But I am disappointed. So very disappointed. Just… rest now. I will tend to Atticus and the evening meal, so you rest.”
Lifting up the coverlet, she helped Lily slide down into the bed and covered her up. Lily rolled onto her side, closing her eyes, as Adria gazed at the woman and felt a good deal of bewilderment and disenchantment. She had hoped that Lily might see the need to be truthful, but that didn’t seem to be the case.
Time would tell if she changed her mind.
Quietly, Adria quit the chamber, heading out to go about her duties, trying to forget about the conversation, at least for the moment.
She had to clear her head.
When the chamber was still and Lily was dozing, the door to the alcove slowly opened. The panel swung back to reveal a rather stunned old woman.
Jordan had heard everything.
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
“What are you doing in the bailey? I thought you were resting?”
The curious question came from Scott as he spoke to his mother, who had just found him near the stables. The small, elderly woman had ventured out of that sturdy keep where she was supposed to be sleeping, hunting down her eldest son.
And she did not look pleased.
“I must speak with ye,” she said seriously. “Now.”
Scott thought she sounded rather severe. “Go ahead,” he said. “You have my attention.”
Jordan waved him off sharply. “Someplace private,” she said. “Someplace that is not the keep. I willna have anyone hear what I must tell ye.”
He cocked his head. “Now you have my curiosity,” he said. “Will the hall do?”
“Nay.”
“The chapel?”
“Lead on.”
Together, they crossed the outer bailey and back into the inner bailey where the small chapel was built against the wall from the same red stones as the rest of the castle. Scott took his mother inside the cool, dark structure with its dirt floor and precious glass windows by the altar. When they were well inside, he faced her.
“Well?” he said. “What is so important that I had to take you to a secret place?”
She was in no mood for his jest. “I have heard something most disturbing,” she said. “There’s no way tae be tactful about this, so I’ll come out with it. I was resting in the alcove next tae Lily’s chamber when her lady came in.”
“Adria?”
“Aye,” Jordan said. “Adria was quite upset and gave Lily quite a scolding.”
Scott frowned. “God’s Bones, what about?”
“It seems that Lily has been unfaithful tae Will.”
Scott lost his mirth, his eyes widened with confusion and surprise. “What?” he said, rather loudly. “What on earth makes you say such a thing?”
Jordan lifted hand, indicating for him to keep his voice down. “Because I heard the conversation between Adria and Lily,” she said. “It seems that Lily has been carrying on with Will’s very own knight, Marcellus, since before they were married. I heard Lily say that she wanted tae marry the man, but her father wouldna hear of it. He wanted a de Wolfe husband for her and forced her tae marry Will.”
By this time, Scott’s features were pale with shock. “Oh, my God,” he breathed. “I know Chris forced the marriage. That was never a secret.”
“But did ye know that the knight Lily loves was also vying for her hand?” Jordan asked, her Scots temper building. “Chris turned the man down, but that dinna stop Lily from carrying on with him for all of these years. Worse still, Atticus and the child she carries are not Will’s children – they are Marcellus’.”
Scott’s mouth popped open in outrage. “Christ,” he boomed. “You cannot be serious!”
Jordan’s rage was taking hold. “So serious that it’s all I can do not tae take a stick tae Lily,” she said. “If I had any less control, I’d beat the lass tae a pulp and be happy for it. She’s shamed our Will. She’s shamed the de Lohr name. The lass has been whoring with another man!”
It was rare when Jordan used such strong language, but she was genuinely furious. Scott stood there, his eyes wide and his hand over his mouth, trying to absorb what his mother was telling him.
Atticus and the child Lily carries are Marcellus’…
He could hardly believe it. His hand came away from his mouth and went to his head as if to hold his brains in.
“And you’re certain of this?” he asked, aghast.
Jordan nodded. “I wouldna tell ye if I wasna,” she said. “Lily and Adria dinna know I was listening. In truth, it was difficult not tae listen because they were fighting about it. So much makes sense now – how Lily and Will werena a love match. How they were more friends than lovers, with nary a bit of affection between them. It was because of Lily!”
It certainly looked that way. Scott, who wasn’t normally quick to temper, went from astonishment to a slow burn fairly rapidly when he thought of the bigger picture and how Lily had evidently been lying to his son. His beloved eldest boy.
His heir.
Rage began to sprout.
“Keep this to yourself until I find Will,” he said, his jaw flexing dangerously. “We will tell him together.”
Jordan was twitching angrily. “Lily asked Adria why she hadn’t told Will and Adria said that it wasna her secret tae tell,” she said. “Mayhap it’s not Adria’s secret tae tell, but I’ve no such restraint. ’Tis going tae be painful for Will tae hear it, but the man must know.”
Scott nodded, thinking on his eldest son who had seen more than his share of heartache in his lifetime already. “I know,” he said. “God, the more I think about it, the angrier I become. Will is blaming himself for Lily’s condition. He blames himself for planting his seed in her and creating the child that is slowly killing her. He blames himself for so much.”
“And Lily has let him.”
Scott looked at his mother pointedly. “Aye, she has,” he said. “That little… Christ, I do not use that language easily, but I cannot help myself. That little wench has let him go through so much and, all the while, she was bedding another man and bearing his children, letting Will believe they were his. That goes beyond anything I thought a well-born woman was capable of.”
“Not just any woman, but a de Lohr woman,” Jordan said. “A woman who cemented the alliance between two great families.”
Scott nodded, sickened as his anger began to spread. “And now we find out that she’s no better than a common whore.”
Jordan was watching him carefully, knowing what he was capable of in a rage. Her anger had fed his own, so she calmed herself, fearful of what would happen if she didn’t. “Breathe,” she said. “Regain what ye can of yer composure because if Will sees yer anger, he may not be able to control his. Ye must be calm.”
Scott took a long, deep breath. “I know,” he said. “Do you know where Will’s solar is in the keep?”
“I do.”
“Go there and wait for me. I will bring Will.”
Jordan left without another word, quickly leaving the chapel and leaving Scott standing there, stunned and furious. He could hardly believe any of it, but it must be the truth. His mother wouldn’t lie to him. It was a situation he couldn’t even wrap his head around yet.
Lily had been lying for all of these years.
It was time for Will to have a dose of that truth.
*
“Greetings Matha,” Will said, entering his solar with his father on his heels. “I thought you were resting.”
Jordan had started the fire in the hearth. She was always cold, so a fire was always in order. Sitting next to the hearth on a small stool, she lifted her eyes to focus on her grandson as he entered the chamber.
“I was,” she said simply. “But now I’m here.”
Will came over to the fire to make sure it was blazing warmly enough for her. He was a good boy, always wanting to take care of those around him, especially his grandparents.
“Get out of my way,” he teased her quietly, taking the poker from her and fussing with the peat. “You know nothing about a fire. Let a man do his job.”
Jordan smiled faintly at h
er pushy grandson. “A man canna do his job without a woman telling him how,” she said. “Ye’ve been listening tae Poppy tae much.”
Will grinned. “I have not been listening to him enough,” he said with one final poke. He set the poker aside. “Papa says you must speak with me about Lily.”
Jordan’s smile faded. “I do,” she said, glancing at Scott. “Did he tell ye why?”
Will sat down on the floor next to her. “Nay,” he said. “Why? Is something wrong?”
Jordan cleared her throat softly. “Ye could say that,” she said. “Now, I want ye tae understand the circumstances of what I’m tae tell ye. I overheard something that ye should know.”
“What did you overhear?”
“I was in the alcove next tae Lily’s chamber and I heard her lady come in – Adria.”
Will nodded. “I know Adria,” he said. “What about her?”
Jordan sighed faintly, looking at the boy she’d loved since before he was born. In fact, she’d helped deliver him, so she had a special place in her heart for the lusty baby who had grown into a fine, strong man. “I wasna eavesdropping, Will,” she said. “I was only in the next chamber. The door was open and I couldna help what I heard.”
“What did you hear?”
“Lily and Adria were arguing,” she said quietly. “Will, this will come as a shock tae ye, but it canna be helped. It seems that Lily has been unfaithful tae ye.”
The warm expression on Will’s face faded. “What in the hell are you talking about?”
“Lily and Adria were speaking of it,” Jordan said, watching him carefully for his reaction. “Adria confronted Lily for being unfaithful tae ye. It seems that Lily has been carrying on with yer knight, Marcellus. It has been going on a long time, Will.”
He looked at her, incredulous. “You heard this?”
Jordan nodded, her concern for his reaction growing. “I did,” she said. “Adria accused Lily of being unfair tae ye, but Lily… she said that she loves Marcellus. The lass wasna remorseful about it.”
Will rocked back on his heels as if the information had physically impacted him. He averted his gaze after a moment, obviously contemplating everything he’d been told. Brow furrowed, he returned his focus to his grandmother.
WolfeLord: de Wolfe Pack Generations Page 21