Dalton took a step forward, and for a moment, Jillian thought he might take her into his arms again. Instead, he abruptly turned and headed back down the hallway. When he reached the end, he stopped, paused, and then turned around to look at her. She was embarrassed that she had been caught still watching him.
“I need to bank the fire in the parlor,” he said simply. “You’ve worked hard today and I expect you’re pretty worn out, so I’ll see you in the morning.” Then, almost as an after thought, he said, “Good night.” Without waiting for a reply, he turned and headed toward the parlor.
Jillian quickly went into her room, shutting the door behind her and leaning up against it. She took a few deep breaths and tried to calm her racing heart. She wanted him to kiss her again, wanted to feel his arms around her. What was she thinking? She was through with men, wasn’t she? Things were working out wonderfully the way they were. She would not allow her heart to be trampled on again.
Forcing herself to recall Nathan Shaw and how he had deceived her, she walked over to her vanity and sat down. Methodically, she began removing the pins from her hair. Picking up her brush, she slowly began working her way through her mass of curls, as images of Nathan began to fill her mind. She felt icy fingers start to wrap around her heart again, as the images became more vivid. How could she have been so blind? Of course, Nathan had been an expert at hiding his true character. She remembered the night her whirlwind romance began.
It was the night of the Spring Ball Extravaganza. Jillian was sixteen and a half, and it was her first opportunity to attend the ball.
She wore the new emerald green dress Father had brought back from his trip to Paris. The color was perfect for her and made the green of her eyes come alive. She’d always considered herself mostly plain, but she did like her eyes and the long lashes that framed them. Tonight, as she gazed into the mirror, she thought herself almost attractive. Her strawberry curls were meticulously piled atop her head with just the right amount draping down the back of her neck. The cut of the dress was daringly lower than most of the dresses she owned, but not so low as to compromise her modesty. It did, however, compliment her recently filled out figure, and she felt excited for the evening ahead. There was a knock at her bedroom door.
“Come in,” she called and smiled in the mirror as Marcus entered her room. He let out a long, low whistle.
“I’ll be beating them off of you tonight, Little Sis. You’re sure you want to be wearing that dress?” He looked her up and down. “I’ll have my work cut out for me, protecting the honor of the most beautiful girl at the ball.” He feigned pulling a sword from his waistcoat and stood in front of her with his other arm out to protect her. Playfully she swatted him on the shoulder and stood on her tiptoes to kiss him on the cheek.
“Oh, Marcus, you’re the sweetest brother I have.”
“I’m the only brother you have,” Marcus said grinning.
“Well, if I did have another, you would definitely be the sweetest.”
“If you did have another, I might not have to work so hard tonight defending your honor. I would have a comrade in arms.” He gave his imaginary sword one last swipe and then gave her his most handsome smile. “Sweet as I may be, dear sister, I have come to collect you. Our carriage is ready and we will be late if we do not leave this very moment.”
Jillian took one last look in the mirror, twisted a curl back into place, and then linked her arm through Marcus’s.
“Well, lead the way, my dear champion. You do know how I hate to be late.”
“That I know, dear sister, that I know.” And with that, they were on their way, arriving at the ball with a couple minutes to spare.
Already the great hall was bustling with all sorts of different dignitaries and members of the elite class. Providence was known for its Spring Ball Extravaganza. The city overflowed with visitors this time of year, mostly nieces and nephews of wealthy businessmen and landowners. The Providence Gazette, a weekly paper that featured the high society “goings on” in the city, always published an article on the event the following day. It covered, in particular, the current most attractive debutantes and most eligible bachelors. It was considered most advantageous to get oneself mentioned. Some of the more outlandish youths even planned bizarre pranks to catch the attention of the reporters.
Marcus escorted Jillian into the ballroom after collecting her dance card. Immediately, she spotted Bethany Johansen and tugged on Marcus’s arm to lead her in that direction. Bethany was a true beauty if ever there was one. She had curled her dark ebony hair tonight and pinned it up in an attractive style, with just enough of the rich darks curls hanging down around her neck, in a soft and enticing manner.
Bethany and Jillian had been best friends since, well, forever, it seemed. Jillian was only four when Bethany moved into the house across the street. They became instant friends, spending countless hours having tea parties with their dolls. Their other favorite activities had been exploring and pretending they were in danger of being captured by pirates.
As they grew older, they spent their days sharing secrets and talking about boys and men. They enjoyed practicing their ladylike poses and phrases for the express purpose of catching the attention of some unsuspecting member of the opposite sex.
Bethany was the only one that knew about Jillian’s secret attraction to the dashing Mr. Nathan Shaw. In turn, Jillian was the only one that knew about Bethany’s infatuation with her brother, Marcus. Jillian could see the blush rise to Bethany’s cheeks as they neared her. She couldn’t blame her friend. Marcus was both extremely handsome and endearingly charismatic. He had thick blond hair with only the slightest hint of curl, so instead of being unruly, like hers, it lay in perfect waves. He also had the same green eyes and thick lashes as she did. Marcus took pride in his physique, working hard to keep his body in perfect shape. No, she couldn’t blame Bethany Johansen for falling in love with her brother. Marcus was a good catch. Both girls squealed in delight as they clasped hands when Jillian finally reached her.
“Oh, Jillian, you look absolutely divine. Not a man here will be able to resist you tonight, nor does any other girl stand a chance.” Bethany pretended to pout for a moment, but her face quickly turned to a smile again.
“Don’t be silly, Bethany. You know you will be the one getting all the attention. That color of blue is spectacular on you.” Jillian stood back a step to get a better look.
“Well, maybe I’ll get some attention from the ones you reject.” They both burst into giggles and hugged one another. Marcus spoke up then.
“I think you’re both getting attention right now from the entire assembly, going on like you are.” Both girls quickly straightened themselves and attempted to look proper. Bethany shyly looked up at Marcus.
“Hello, Marcus. Thank you for bringing Jillian here so promptly. You saved me from looking awfully pitiful, just standing here all by myself.”
Marcus took a low bow and swept Bethany’s hand up into his own, placing a very proper, albeit lingering, kiss there. Bethany blushed beautifully.
“The pleasure is all mine, my lady. I do adore rescuing beautiful, stranded females like yourself.” He didn’t release her hand right away. “Besides, you know our Jillian absolutely abhors being the slightest bit tardy to anything.”
Jillian’s smile widened as Bethany’s blush deepened, this time creeping up her neck and face before settling onto her cheeks. Marcus was teasing her mercilessly. Jillian gave him a hard nudge in his ribs and he finally let go of her hand. Bethany was still speechless, so Jillian nudged her with her other elbow, but to her amusement, her friend still stood dumfounded.
“Why, Bethany Johansen,” Marcus began, “the rose of your blush flatters me.” He was in trouble now. Jillian dug the heel of her shoe into his foot. She saw him grimace slightly, but she could tell that it wasn’t going to stop him. If he continued, he’d have Bethany so flustered it would ruin their entire evening. She had to interrupt before he said anythin
g else.
“Marcus, be a dear boy and fetch Bethany and me something to drink, won’t you? It is getting quite warm in here already, and I’m sure Bethany is as parched as I am.” She gave him a look that said, “You’d better not cross me, big brother.”
Marcus bowed again, low and graceful. “Ah, but your wish is my command.” And with a wink, which only served to turn Bethany’s face an even darker shade of pink, he turned and headed toward the refreshment tables. When Marcus left, Jillian heard Bethany let out the breath she had been holding. Jillian laughed and put her arm through her friend’s, giving it a little squeeze.
“You know, Beth, you’ve practically grown up in the same household as Marcus. Why are you still so tongue-tied around him?” she asked.
Bethany sighed. “I don’t know, Jillian. He just does something to me when he’s around, and I can’t think or move or do anything but stare at him. All that practicing we did when we were younger obviously hasn’t paid off for me.” Bethany rolled her eyes in exasperation, causing Jillian to laugh heartily again.
“Well, you do manage to change colors pretty easily,” she pointed out between giggles. She tried to stop and appear more dignified. “Seriously, Beth, you’re never going to get anywhere if you can’t say two words to him.”
“I know, I know,” Bethany sighed.
Just then, Jillian caught sight of Nathan Shaw. He’d entered the room, immediately spotted Marcus over at the refreshment table, and gone to join him. Oh, how fine he was to look at. His hair was light brown with a touch of gold streaked through it, and his eyes were the color of brown sugar. Now, it was Jillian’s turn to get nervous.
Usually, Jillian was actually quite comfortable around Nathan, not getting all jittery and befuddled as did quite a few of the other girls who tried to get his attention. Marcus and Nathan had been good friends since she was about ten, and he spent a lot of his time at their house. Not only had he seen her through her awkward years, they had, since they’d first met, playfully teased each other back and forth. By now, they had a fairly comfortable and open relationship with each other, except for the fact that she was secretly enamored with him, and he only thought of her as his best friend’s little sister.
Jillian saw her brother nod his head in her direction and say something to Nathan. Nathan turned in her direction and caught her eye. Jillian quickly looked away, embarrassed to be caught staring. When she looked back at him, he was still looking at her, seemingly admiring her. She watched as he said something to Marcus and headed in her direction. Jillian began to fidget and Bethany, whom she forgot was standing next to her, gave her a little nudge. It was her turn to be teased. Jillian turned to give Bethany a sour, but playful look. When she turned back, Nathan was standing directly in front of her. He took her hand and demurely gave it a kiss.
“Good evening, Miss Jillian Grey.” He was being ever so polite. “Might I be the first to tell you that you are ravishing this evening?” He stood back, still holding her hand, and looked her over from head to toe. “All grown up and blossomed right before my very eyes.”
“Why, it is kind of you to notice, Mr. Nathan Shaw.” Jillian pulled her hand back out of his and began fiddling with her dance card.
“Notice?” he said surprised. “Well, I’m afraid no man within miles of you could help but notice the great beauty you’ve become.” She was flustered, but thankfully, she managed to keep her wits about her.
“Why, Nathan Shaw, don’t you waste your practiced charms on me. I’ve known you too long to be taken in by your fickle and flirtatious ways. You might be able to fool some of the other women here tonight, but you can bet I won’t be one of them.” Unconsciously, she had stomped one of her feet to make her point. It was a habit she needed to break. When she realized what she had done, she was grateful he hadn’t noticed.
“Waste?” he asked as he leaned in a little closer. “Nothing, my dear Miss Jillian, would ever be a waste on you.” As he leaned back, he snatched her dance card from her hand and proceeded to write his name on every line. Shocked, Jillian snatched it back from him and looked at it.
“Why, Nathan Shaw! Now I won’t get to dance with anyone but you the entire night!” She pretended to be angry, but secretly she was overjoyed.
Nathan just gave her his wide, handsome grin and turned to walk away, calling over his shoulder, “I’ll see you when the music begins.”
They danced the whole night, and Jillian found herself literally swept off her feet. The next morning, it was evident that the Providence Gazette had taken notice of her whirlwind evening. A week later, Nathan asked Jillian’s father for permission to court her. Her parents were thrilled and so was Marcus. Thus began their romance.
Jillian had known Nathan for so long that after the initial shock of finding out that he had feelings for her as well, they fell into a comfortable courtship. Bethany was thrilled for her, and the two girls spent many happy hours discussing in length what it would be like to be the wife of Mr. Nathan Shaw. Jillian loved children so much, she was certain they would marry and begin a family right away. Nathan, however, thought it better that they have a long courtship. He respected her and never took liberties with her, so she was comfortable waiting for a while. She felt somewhat frustrated though that he would never do more than give her a quick peck on the cheek when he said good night. She wished he would at least once sweep her into his arms and kiss her on the lips, but if he wanted to wait, she would respect his wishes. After they were married, they would have plenty of time for romantic kisses.
The thought of kissing Nathan made Jillian shudder and broke her from her thoughts. She was ever so glad that his lips had never touched hers.
An image of Dalton came into her mind. What a contrast! She felt her body simultaneously warm and shiver slightly with delight as she thought of the kiss they had shared the day before. Never had she imagined a kiss could be like that. Her heart sped up again just thinking about it. He didn’t even have to be near her to make her feel this way.
Jillian laid the brush down, changed quickly into her nightclothes, and slipped into bed. She would allow herself to dream of Dalton tonight. Surely it couldn’t hurt to just dream of him. Tomorrow she would try harder to control her feelings and be more firm in her commitment to keep romance out of their relationship.
Dalton poked fervently at the log on the hearth. He was finding it difficult to stick to his new resolve. When he had kissed Jillian yesterday, it had taken all his strength to break away and leave. He’d spent the rest of the day chastising himself for giving in to his desire and telling himself that it hadn’t been fair to her. He was fully aware that she had agreed to the loveless marriage he’d offered; it wasn’t right for him to suddenly expect more. But still, when she stood in the hallway just then, looking at him, the desire to kiss her, to take her into his arms and hold her, had returned with fervor.
Finished with the fire, he stood up and headed back toward his room. He stopped briefly and looked at the door across the hall where she slept. Torturing himself, he recalled their kiss one last time. Then, shaking his head to dispel the image, he opened the door to his own room and went inside.
Ten
It was a perfect day for a picnic. Lisa was so excited that she had been bouncing around all morning. Brenn was delightedly following her and hungrily examining the pies and goodies Jillian had made to take with them. Even Jenny seemed to be in high spirits. By ten o’clock, the wagon was packed, and they were ready to go.
The picnic was held at the lake a few miles away from Willow Springs. Jillian was excited to see water again. She always loved her family’s trips to the ocean, and since she knew she might never see it again, she was determined to love the lake just as well.
Jillian was a bit anxious and was trying to concentrate on the children to help quell her nerves. Other than seeing some of the townsfolk at church the last few Sundays, she hadn’t done any real socializing. She had met one young woman that she liked, Olivia Jenkins, the
pastor’s daughter. She and her father had come calling the Sunday after Jillian had arrived, and Olivia and Jillian had talked quite a bit. She was grateful that Aunt Betty had promised to stay close today and give her fair warning if anyone headed her way that she should avoid. She’d heard there were those in town not happy that Dalton was no longer an eligible bachelor.
Earlier that morning, she’d a difficult time deciding what to wear. Other than her party gowns, she’d only packed her more practical dresses. Since a picnic was no place to wear a party dress, she had finally decided on a peach colored dress she hadn’t worn yet. It was just a little fancier than the other dresses she had brought. Lisa had been beside herself when Jillian had come out of the house wearing it. Jillian was pleased and looked forward to having the extra time this winter to make the girls a few new dresses of their own.
Dalton’s gaze swept over her appraisingly, and she felt her pulse quicken. She pretended not to notice him looking at her. She did, however, sneak a few appraising looks of her own. He looked so handsome in his newer looking pair of denim jeans and clean white shirt, which was rolled up at the sleeves, accentuating his sun bronzed skin.
After a short wagon ride, they were unloading their things. Dalton quickly grabbed their bundles and ushered the children toward Uncle Ned, who was lying down on a blanket in the soft grass close to the lake. Aunt Betty came hurrying over.
Giving Jillian a hug, she exclaimed, “My, you look lovely today, dear. May I help you carry some of your things?”
“Oh yes, please,” Jillian gratefully answered as she looked over at the tables that were bustling with women. She would be glad for the company, if not for the help.
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