The argument was already joined when Aidan entered the war council. Nobody paid him much attention, and being commander of the Falcon Guards would prevent him from having the equal voice in council to which he was entitled. He accepted a bowl of rations from a tech, and began to pick at the meal of mostly vegetables and fruits from Tukayyid as he listened to the discussion.
The issue under debate was whether to give artillery cover to the heavy OmniMechs as they mounted an assault on the two bridges over the Prezno River. Beyond the bridges, which were apparently being held by small units from the Third Com Guard Army and the Eleventh Com Guards, were the two cities that were the Jade Falcons' assigned objectives. Not only were the Cluster commanders arguing over the issue of artillery cover, they were also bickering about how much ammunition to use.
Bored with listening to the various commanders throwing facts and figures at one another, Aidan glanced around the grove. Like him, most of the Jade Falcon officers were silently watching and listening. Some, however, showed by their body movements and sounds of approval or disapproval which side they endorsed. On the fringes of the grove, a few warriors were moving around nervously, eager to get back to their BattleMechs and the battle.
"Your face shows a sour expression, Aidan Pryde," said a voice from behind him. Recognizing the voice at once, Aidan did not turn around immediately. It was Marthe Pryde speaking. Just hearing her set off vivid flashes of memory, particularly of times in the sibko when she used to speak in just this gentle voice. They had talked of so many things in those long ago days, of falcons in the air, pilots in their BattleMechs, fate in their lives.
He turned to see Marthe standing calmly. In one hand, she was holding a thin branch. With the other hand she was methodically pulling off the few spiky leaves still attached to the bark. But she did it absentmindedly, for her eyes were on him.
"I was not aware I looked—what did you say?—sour?"
"Well, most people cannot read your face as I can, the way I learned back in the sibko."
"I thought you had rejected all memory of the sibko."
"What makes you think that?"
"Something you told me once about leaving sibko days behind."
Marthe nodded. "Perhaps I did say that. I do not always speak well." She tested the stick, which she had stripped of leaves, bending it, letting it go, examining its resilience. "What is your opinion of our Tukayyid campaign so far?"
"It has been too cautious, too slow. We should be on the other side of Prezno River by now, but instead we're sitting in some grove discussing how to get there or how much ammo to use in assaulting the bridges."
"You do not approve of the strategy debate?"
Aidan felt his hands go involuntarily into fists. "No, I do not approve. Not that my approval matters one way or another. They argue like merchants over the price of a bauble. How trivial this is." He inclined his head toward where the heated discussion continued.
"Trivial? I do not think Khan Chistu would like to hear that."
"Someone should tell him."
"Perhaps someone will."
"You have his ear?"
"Sometimes. When I wish it."
"You couple with him?"
"Sometimes. When I want to."
"Not under his orders?"
"I do little under anyone's orders."
"I envy you, Marthe."
"No. I envy you, Aidan Pryde."
She looked away from him, away from the debate. With a whip of one arm, she flung the stick, watched it sail out of the grove, then land near the tail section of one of the VTOLs.
"Marthe, how could you envy me? You must know of my codex by now. I am one of the tainted ones, in command of a dezgra unit, while you, you have ascended to near the top of the Clan Jade Falcon command structure. As you say, the Khan will listen to you."
"But you have become the real Clan warrior, Aidan Pryde. In this campaign, you may choose your own battles, dictate your own fate. And you have more than just the respect of your warriors. They admire you. You know, do you not, that they are calling your unit 'Pryde's Pride'?"
"So I have heard. But the respect of my warriors is no different than what they would grant any commander."
"You are wrong. My Cluster does its duty, to be sure, but no one has named us 'Marthe's Marauders.' But let that go. It is not what I wish to discuss. I am genuinely curious about your opinion of Clan Jade Falcon at present. Tell me as if I were planning an overthrow."
"Are you? Planning an overthrow?"
"Of course not. But tell me. What has prompted that sour look?"
The back of Marthe's left hand rubbed nervously against her trousers. The lines in her forehead were deep, deeper than his. Her mouth had hardened into a thin line, making the triangular shape of her face seem even more geometric. Once they had looked alike. Now the resemblance had diminished. If she resembled anyone, Marthe looked like that young MechWarrior in Joanna's Star, Diana.
"I was thinking back to our cadet days," Aidan said. "Remember when we arrived on Ironhold?"
"Yes. I recall Falconer Joanna giving you a beating, then saying she thought you had a fine chance of testing out and becoming a warrior. I envied you a bit then, too."
"Did you know that Joanna is in my Cluster now?"
"No, I did not. I thought she must be dead."
He told her about how Joanna had drilled the Falcon Guards into a fighting unit.
"You are evading my question, Aidan Pryde. About this meeting and why it seems trivial to you."
"Back when we were cadets, I had so many ideas about what it meant to be a warrior. In my imaginings, a Clan warrior would never be concerned with looking backward."
"I agree. That is how I thought of it, too."
"Then perhaps you also agree that such a MechWarrior would not be debating over artillery cover. Such warriors would bid for the right to take those bridges, providing their own artillery cover. For that matter, what BattleMech really needs artillery support?"
"None, really. But there are precedents for considering such tactics in major military campaigns, and for dispensing with bidding after the first batchall."
"Perhaps, but that is more like the Inner Sphere way of thinking. What kind of Star League can the Clans build with Inner Sphere thinking?"
Marthe shrugged. "If it is any consolation, many other Clan officers share your views. Something may be done."
"But is that the Clan way? Is it our way to decide matters through political chicanery? Again, Inner Sphere. The present debate, that is Inner Sphere, too. Is this what a few military losses have done to our natural inclination for warfare?"
"What would you wish then?"
"What do I wish? I do not know. I think I want victory or defeat to depend on the skills of warriors and not on complicated designs made by Clan leaders guessing at the complicated designs of our enemy's leaders."
"Well, perhaps you are a bit naive about warfare but..."
"Naive?"
"Idealistic then."
"Watch this, Marthe."
Breaking away from her, he strode toward the center of the grove, where the discussion had degenerated into a series of altercations about how much personnel to commit to the battle for each bridge. Elbowing aside his fellow commanders, Aidan interrupted the debate, shouting, "Dawn is here and there is still argument. Forget artillery cover. Forget how much personnel to assign. I am Star Colonel Aidan Pryde. I bid the Falcon Guard Cluster for the right to take both bridges!"
Khan Vandervahn Chistu held up his left hand for Aidan to hold his tongue. "Star Colonel, I have not authorized bidding for these objectives."
"Yes, Khan," he said, "I understand. Nevertheless the Falcon Guards demand the right to take the Prezno River bridges."
"Falcon Guards! Hah!" said an officer standing a few meters away from Aidan. Aidan recognized the scoffing tone that he had heard so often in his life.
He glanced back, saw Marthe scrutinizing him intently. She nodded just p
erceptibly, a gesture he took as approval. "If there is to be no bidding, then give the assignment to the Falcon Guards, and you can dispense with all this debilitating discussion."
Screams of protest went up from the other Clan commanders.
"It would bring shame on us to permit the Falcon Guards to lead the Jade Falcons into battle," asserted a Star Colonel whom Aidan recognized as a warrior named Senza Oriega. She was said to have one of the most admirable codexes in the entire Jade Falcon Clan.
Others supported her, including Galaxy Commander Mar Helmer. Aidan immediately sensed that he was fighting a losing battle. To them, to the Khan, to Mar Helmer, Aidan's demand was mere bravado. And he did, of course, understand their point of view. It was important who led the Jade Falcons at this point in the campaign. The bridges represented their first major engagement on Tukayyid. Still, there was no need to judge his Falcon Guards by the shame brought on the unit by Adler Malthus. Having charged forward with the demand, he could not easily back down.
"If you do not wish to place the Falcon Guards at the head of the bridge attacks, then at least cease this foolish bickering over technicalities. Any Jade Falcon unit may lead the way with proper dignity. We lose time now. Let us end this discussion and go to war!"
Surprisingly, his impassioned rhetoric won approbation from many of the warriors. Some even began to push at one another, on the verge of brawling. Again the Khan raised his hand and demanded quiet.
"Star Colonel Aidan Pryde has spoken well. We must abandon quibbling. It is time to fight!" Turning to Aidan, he said more softly, "I wish to commend you on your leadership of the Falcon Guards, but you can see from the disapprobation of your fellow officers that it is not yet time for the Falcon Guards to lead the charge into battle. That honor goes elsewhere. However, Star Colonel, once contact with the Com Guards is made, your Cluster is authorized to break through at any point possible and head for Olalla. That should be honor enough for your unit even if it does not include being first across the bridges."
Walking back to where Marthe stood, Aidan passed other commanders, some of whom muttered angry taunts at him. He heard the words dezgra and taint more than once. If the fight for Tukayyid were not so important, Aidan might have demanded several honor duels even before reaching Marthe's side.
"You have not changed so much, I see," said Marthe.
"You refer to my reputation for always overreaching myself?"
"In a way. Perhaps I would say a certain lack of shrewdness. But then, if you had the shrewdness, you might have to adopt some Inner Sphere ways yourself."
Aidan shrugged off any further discussion. Instead, he said, "Once, Marthe, when we were very young, you claimed to love me. Childish talk, you later told me. You said that we of the Clan did not love. What are your thoughts on the subject now?"
"I have no thoughts on the subject. I can say that what I felt in the sibko is still true. We were close then. We went beyond sibko closeness. We were friends, I think."
"Not exactly a Clan word, either—friends."
"No. But I wish for us to be close always. That is not love perhaps. But it is real."
"I will settle for it, Marthe."
"And perhaps, after the battle, you would spend some time with me in my quarters. Or I could come to yours."
A new surprise. They had not coupled since early in cadet days.
"I would wish that, Marthe.'
"Good. Well-bargained and done."
Dawn had come, and the offensive was now set to begin an hour hence. Watching the council laboriously end its session, the two former sibkin remained silent for awhile, then Marthe spoke.
"War councils and warriors," she said. "The words sound well together, but they do not belong together. Warriors should act, not talk. It is the way of the Clan to avoid waste. We conserve material; we try to conserve lives through bidding the lowest possible force of personnel. But we have no qualms about wasting words, quiaff?"
"Aff. Marthe, I fear that the Clans are in danger of losing Tukayyid. And why? Because our numbers and combat abilities came up short? No, I do not believe that. It may be that we had already lost when we agreed to this proxy battle, lost by giving too much respect to the Inner Sphere, to ComStar."
"Respect? I respect no one from the Inner Sphere or ComStar."
"And neither do I." He dropped his voice. "But perhaps our leaders do. Perhaps they have been hoodwinked by fancy Inner Sphere words. Marthe, we invaded the Inner Sphere. Invaders do battle, take bondsmen, receive isorla, leave scars on landscapes. We conquer on our terms. Now, suddenly, we are fighting on their terms. It is not right, Marthe. Of that much only am I certain. It is not right. Once the ilKhan agreed to deal with the enemy representative, he compromised the way of the Clan. That is all I know. But I am a loyal Clan warrior and will not fight less fiercely."
"Would you prefer some kind of revolution? Overthrow?"
"No. Never. That would be Inner Sphere, too, and not Clan."
"Yes, I agree."
They were silent for a while. Aidan felt peculiar. He had never expected to find that he and Marthe would be so much alike when they met again. Once he had thought they had grown apart. Though both were plagued with doubts about the conduct of the war, he felt a certain pleasure in their secret alliance.
As the war council began to break up, Marthe and Aidan joined the exodus, stopping when they reached Marthe's hovercraft. She turned toward him, her face partially in shadow.
"What is it, Aidan?" she asked, seeming puzzled by his expression.
"In this light, you look so much like one of the Falcon Guard warriors—MechWarrior Diana."
"Perhaps her sibko shared our Mattlov or Pryde gene heritage."
"She is freeborn."
"I have never had a child."
"What a curious thing to say."
"I know. Clan warriors are rarely parents. Have you ever been?"
"Just the thought of it makes me uneasy. The mere words relating to natural birth make me uncomfortable."
"If I visit the Falcon Guards, you will show me this MechWarrior, quiaff?"
"Aff."
Marthe began to climb into her hovercraft, then turned back. "I wanted to say that . . . well, I would be proud to enter battle led by the Falcon Guards. By Pryde's Pride."
Then she was gone, vanished into the darkness of the hovercraft. Aidan walked to his VTOL, along the way hearing further mutterings from Clan commanders. Perhaps he even heard one of them call the Falcon Guards " Pryde's Denied."
* * *
Diana watched her father leave the VTOL and stride to the Guard command post. She had accompanied him during the ride to the Command Group in order to get a replacement circuit board for her 'Mech. Watching the exchange between Aidan and Marthe Pryde, she had not been sure what to think about it.
Although she strove to be a true Clan warrior, it was still difficult to purge some of her village ways. Coupling among the lower castes was much less casual than among Clan warriors, and a taboo existed against sexual contact between members of the same family. Yet, Clan warriors, members of the same genetic line, the same sibko, coupled easily and often. She did not begrudge her father the comfort of sex, but it made her uneasy to think he might do it with a sibkin.
Then it struck her that she, after all, was the offspring of Aidan and another member of his sibko, Peri. That had never seemed significant or ominous. But Peri was her mother, and Diana had grown up admiring her, though she was often absent. She recalled Peri once telling her that words for the parent-child relation were nearly obscene in the sibko, which was why Diana did not call her "mother." Peri had been raised to believe the word forbidden, the very concept of parenthood anathema. Though she had willingly become a parent, abandoning birth control in order to conceive a child by Aidan, she had gradually taught her daughter to call her Peri instead of mother.
"You look somewhat pensive this evening, MechWarrior Diana."
She turned and saw that it was Elemental Sta
r Commander Selima of the First Delta Elemental Star. He was a tall, dark-skinned man with prominent cheekbones and a gentle mouth. The tallest of all the Falcon Guard Elementals, he towered over Diana, who was tall for a MechWarrior. She had always liked him. He was not gruff or rude like so many Elementals, and seemed capable of serious thought, another contrast to most Elementals. She had never seen him engage in horseplay with other members of his sub-caste. Generally, he held himself aloof.
"You will not report me for thinking on duty, will you, Star Commander Selima?"
"No. I saw no dereliction. My comment was directed to the expression on your face. You were thinking of something that had meaning for you."
"In a way. But it is a private thought."
"Aahhh. I had not meant to intrude."
"You did not intrude. I am glad you are diverting me from it."
"A pleasure. You are a special MechWarrior, Diana."
"Why do you say that?"
"Because you are complicated. Not many warriors are complicated."
"I am freeborn."
"That may explain it."
"You do not find warriors to be complicated? Do you not think our Star Colonel, for example, complicated?"
"Yes, I do. But like you, he is different. Examine his codex. Not the typical military record."
They talked a while longer. Before Selima left, Diana said to him, "You have not commented on my physical appearance, Selima. Men usually do."
"Elemental men?"
"Well, no, not Elemental men."
"There you have it. We do not even find each other beautiful. We would hate it if we did."
"I hate it, and I am not Elemental."
"You, MechWarrior Diana, are a genetic misfit," he said with a smile that made his words sound complimentary. "And now I bid you good night."
The tall Elemental loped away gracefully, returning to his Star's assembly area.
Diana was suddenly unhappy. This night, which should have been filled with the sound and fury of battle, was filled with words instead. Walking quickly and then breaking into a run, she went toward her BattleMech to prepare for the attack. Well, she thought, at least for now the words will stop.
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