Bethany’s heart sank. “My brother is not sick at home.”
“I see.” Ms. Kenworthy opened a desk drawer and pulled out a sheet of notebook paper. “Then I assume you did not write this note?”
Bethany removed her gloves, took the note and quickly scanned it. It informed Ms. Kenworthy that Ivan would be out of school for a week due to his illness. It was signed with her name. Bethany sighed heavily and handed the letter back. “I did not write this. It is not my signature.”
Ms. Kenworthy took the letter and replaced it in the drawer. “I thought it was odd that Jeffrey was the one who delivered it to me and not your sister. Do you know what Ivan has been doing instead of coming to school?”
“I wish I did. He doesn’t confide in me these days.”
“He was close to his grandfather, wasn’t he?”
The understanding in the teacher’s eyes allowed Bethany to unburden herself. “They were very close. Since Elijah’s death Ivan has refused to talk to me about what’s troubling him. He’s changed so much. I was hoping he might have confided in you.”
“I am deeply sorry for your loss. Elijah was well liked in this community.”
“Thank you.”
“Your brother’s grades were not the best before your grandfather passed away. Since that time, he has earned nothing but Fs for incomplete work. Even when he is here he seems withdrawn until someone speaks to him. Then he’s ready to start a fight over nothing. Unless he does extra-credit work and turns in his missing assignments, I’m afraid he is going to flunk the semester. I know that according to your religion this is his last year of education, but I still have to follow state guidelines. That puts me between a rock and a hard place. If he flunks the semester, he’ll have to attend summer school.”
Bethany shook her head. “Ivan will be needed on the farm this summer. I don’t see how we could spare him even a few hours a day.”
“In that case he will have to repeat this grade next year. Talk to him. Try to make him see what’s at stake.” She removed a folder from another drawer. “Give these assignments to him. Hopefully he can finish most of them over the weekend.”
“I will. Thank you.” Bethany was angry with Ivan for his deceit, but she was more disappointed in herself. Where had she gone wrong? How had she failed him? She tried to be a parent to her siblings but without her grandfather’s help she didn’t know how to reach Ivan. Maybe letting him return to Pennsylvania would be for the best.
Except that it didn’t feel like the right solution. She loved her brother. She couldn’t imagine life without his annoying habits, constant teasing and his hearty laugh. She had to make him see that his actions were tearing the family apart.
But she needed to find him first. Clearly Jeffrey was in on whatever Ivan was up to. His parents lived a mile farther up into the woods from her home.
Bethany left the school building and saw Michael sitting on the buggy step. She’d forgotten him. A thin yellow hound lay a few feet away from him. The dog wagged its tail tentatively as it watched him. Michael pulled his gloves off and took something from his pocket. He held it toward the dog. The animal crept a few inches closer.
“Good girl,” Michael said, tossing the item at the dog’s feet. She snapped it up. At the sound of Bethany approaching, the dog darted for cover between two nearby parked cars.
Bethany stopped beside Michael. The dog grew bold enough to peek out from between the cars but didn’t approach. “I see you made a new friend.”
He rose to his feet. “She was sniffing at the trash cans and trying to get them open. I could see she was looking for a meal. I had a little leftover jerky I picked up on the bus ride here. She appears to need it more than I do. Is your brother at school?”
“Nee, but that doesn’t prove he stole provisions from Jedidiah.”
“You’re still giving him the benefit of the doubt?”
“Of course. He’s my brother.”
“I hope your confidence isn’t misplaced.”
“I pray it’s not but I will admit I’m at my wit’s end. His teacher says he hasn’t been to school all week. His friend gave the teacher a note that was signed with my name that said he was sick at home. I have to find out what’s going on. He’s left each morning to catch the school bus with his sister and he’s walked home with her each evening, yet he hasn’t been in school.”
“Don’t think too badly of him. Boys his age are sometimes impatient to grow up and live their own adventures. Then they make foolish mistakes because they aren’t as smart as they think they are.”
“Are you speaking from experience?”
“I am. My own.”
“How many forged notes did you send to your teacher?”
A wry grin curved his lips. “My teacher happened to be my mother’s youngest sister, so none.”
“I’m afraid of what the bishop will say when Jedidiah tells his side of the story.”
“If the bishop is a reasonable man he’ll listen to your side of the story, as well.”
She was grateful for his reassurance, but he didn’t know how serious the situation was becoming. She held on to the hope that her uncle could be persuaded to let Ivan remain with her. “I will take you to see the bishop now.”
“I appreciate that.” He moved to open the buggy door for her and took her hand to help her in.
His grip was firm but his hand was soft. His skin lacked the calloused roughness of a man who made his living farming the land or woodworking. It wasn’t the hand of a laborer, yet she found his gentle strength oddly comforting.
Perhaps he was a shopkeeper. Her grandfather had had plans to open a small grocery in New Covenant. Maybe that was the job he had promised Michael. It didn’t matter. Her grandfather was gone, and she wasn’t in a position to continue his work. At least not yet.
She looked up and met Michael’s gaze as he continued to hold her hand longer than necessary. There was a profound sadness in the depth of his eyes that she didn’t understand. What troubled him? What was he thinking?
* * *
Michael stared into Bethany’s light blue eyes as the warmth of her touch went all the way to the center of his chest and warmed a place that had been cold for a long time. He studied her face, trying to find out why she triggered such a strong reaction in him.
Her pale blond hair was parted in the middle and worn under a white prayer covering. Her skin was fair with a scattering of freckles across her dainty nose. She was an attractive woman, too attractive for his peace of mind.
He let go of her hand, stepped away and limped around the back of the buggy, letting the pain in his leg remind him of why he had no business thinking about how perfectly her small hand had nestled in his. If things had been different, if he wasn’t so damaged he would have enjoyed getting to know her better, but things weren’t different. He had to accept that.
He also had more serious things to think about. He needed a job and he needed somewhere to live. Preferably a good distance away from other people in this remote community. His neighbors wouldn’t appreciate being awakened in the middle of the night by the screams that sometimes accompanied his nightmares.
Thoughts of his dreams filled him with apprehension as his pulse shot up. He quickly scanned his surroundings. A car drove past the school, the tires crunching on the snow. Children were playing on the playground. He could hear their laughter and shouting. Someone stood at the corner of the school building. He thought it was a woman but he couldn’t be sure. The person was bundled in a parka with the hood up. Perhaps a teacher watching the children. He struggled to convince himself that there was nothing sinister here but he couldn’t shake the feeling that something bad would happen at any second. His heart began to pound as tightness gripped his chest.
The dog ventured out and came to stand in front of him. He focused on her unusual golden eyes. She looked to be pa
rt yellow Labrador retriever and part pointer. Her white-tipped tail wagged slowly. He held out his hand and she sniffed it. It was a shame he didn’t have more to feed her. She retreated again and he got in Bethany’s buggy.
Inside the small space he started to relax. No one could get behind him now. He glanced at Bethany. She was watching him intently. Could she see how anxious he was? He needed to divert her attention. “Are you waiting for something?”
“Nee.” She turned the horse and headed back up the street. The clip-clop of the mare’s hooves was muffled by the snow that covered the road. It was the only sound other than the creaking of the buggy. He discovered he would rather hear Bethany’s voice.
“What kind of business does the bishop own?”
“Our bishop builds and sells storage sheds as well as farming, but he’s thinking of branching out into tiny homes.”
“Then he is a progressive fellow?”
“In his business, but our church is a conservative one.”
“I noticed a propane tank at your home.”
“Our Ordnung allows us to use propane to power business machinery, our refrigerators, washing machines and hot water heaters. We also have running water and indoor bathrooms. We aren’t that conservative but our cookstoves and furnaces must use wood or coal.”
He glanced out over the dense tree-covered hillsides and the snowcapped mountains in the distance. “It doesn’t look like you’ll run out of fuel anytime soon as long as you have a strong fellow to chop and haul it.”
“My brother does that for me.” Her voice was strained. Worry marked her brow with frown lines.
“How old is he?”
“Almost fourteen. Our mother died when Jenny was born. Our father was gone soon afterward.” The undertone of bitterness in her voice surprised him.
“So you were raised by your grandparents.”
“My grandfather took us in. He was a widower.”
“It must’ve been hard to be both mother and sister to your younger siblings.” He found it easier to talk to Bethany than anyone he’d spoken to since the attack. Maybe it was because she talked to cows. He smiled at the memory.
“I never saw caring for my siblings as a burden.” She turned the horse off the street into the parking lot surrounded by various sizes of storage sheds.
A tall, muscular Amish fellow stepped away from a half-finished shed and slipped his hammer into a tool belt that hung on his hips. He didn’t sport a beard, so Michael knew he wasn’t married. His clothes were tattered and sweat-stained, but his smile was friendly as he greeted them. “Guder mariye, Bethany. Need a new shed, do you?”
Bethany opened her door but didn’t step out. “Good morning, Jesse. Is Bishop Schultz about?”
“Nee, he isn’t. He’s gone to Unity. Their bishop is laid up with pneumonia, and Elmer has gone to do the preaching for their service this Sunday and perform a wedding on Tuesday. He won’t be back until Wednesday night.”
“Have you seen Ivan today?”
“Nee, I’ve not. Who is that with you?”
“Jesse, this is Michael Shetler. He is a newcomer. He came expecting to work for my grandfather. He hadn’t heard about Elijah’s passing. I thought perhaps the bishop would know of some work and could find a place for him to stay.”
Jesse hooked his thumbs under his suspenders. “There is work aplenty here. You’re welcome to bunk on my couch until you can find a place, but you’ll have to suffer through my cooking. I’m no hand with a skillet.”
Michael got out of the buggy and grabbed his duffel bag. He would rather stay somewhere alone, but he didn’t have much choice. He forced a smile and a lighthearted reply. “Your cooking can’t be worse than mine. You have yourself a boarder until I can find a place of my own. We can work out the rent later.”
“No need for that.” Jesse moved to take Michael’s bag. “Let me get this for you.”
Michael handed it over. Jesse nodded toward the building he had been working on. “If you don’t mind, I’d like to finish this shed before taking you out to my place.”
“I don’t mind. I’ll give you a hand with it.”
Looking at Michael’s cane, Jesse raised one eyebrow. “Are you sure?”
“I can still swing a hammer.”
“Then your help will be welcome. I’ll see you get paid for the work you do.”
“Danki.”
Michael turned to Bethany. “Looks like your brother has been granted a reprieve if Jedidiah wasn’t able to speak to the bishop.”
Bethany’s eyes brightened. “That’s right.”
“Oh, Jedidiah was here and spoke to Elmer before he left,” Jesse said cheerfully.
Michael watched the hope fade in her eyes and wished there was something he could do to console her.
Chapter Three
Michael watched Bethany drive away with a sharp unexpected sense of loss. She was a lovely woman, but he sensed she was much more than a pretty face. It was obvious that she cared about her family. Anyone who asked a cow for advice had to have a good sense of humor.
He smiled then quickly pushed thoughts of her out of his head. As much as she intrigued him, he was better off not seeing her.
Forming a relationship with Bethany would mean letting her get close. He couldn’t risk that. He had jumped at the chance to come to this part of Maine because it was remote and thinly populated but it held an Amish community. He had left his Amish upbringing once with devastating consequences. After the attack he had returned home hopeful that rejoining his faith and family would repair his shattered life. It hadn’t worked out that way. He didn’t know what more God needed from him.
Michael’s plan for his new life was simple. Live and work alone while coming into contact with as few people as possible. He wasn’t a loner by nature. He had become a recluse out of necessity. Avoiding people was the only way he felt safe. The only way he could keep his affliction hidden. Staying with Jesse was risky, but he had nowhere else to go. He could only pray he didn’t have an episode in front of him.
A doctor in Philadelphia had called it PTSD. Post-traumatic stress disorder, the result of a robbery gone wrong at the jewelry store where he had worked. What it meant was that his life was no longer his own. He lived in near constant fear. When a full-blown flashback hit he relived every detail as his coworkers, his friends, were killed in front of his eyes. The gunshots, the screams, the sirens—he saw it, heard it, felt it all again just as if it were happening to him the first time.
He never knew when a flashback would happen, making it impossible for him to return to work. Even a walk down a city street left him hearing the footsteps of someone following him, waiting to feel the cold, hard barrel of a gun jammed in his back.
He was the one who had let them in. He was the only one who came out alive. Sometimes he felt he should have died with the others, but he couldn’t dwell on that thought. God had other plans for him. He just didn’t know what they were.
The heavy thudding of his heart and the sweat on his brow warned him that thinking about it was the last thing he should be doing. He took a deep breath. Concentrate on something else. Think about Bethany asking her cow for advice and the shocked look on her face when she realized he’d heard her conversation. He visualized her in detail as his pulse slowed to a more normal speed.
From the corner of his eye he caught sight of the yellow dog trotting along the edge of the highway in his direction. Did she belong to someone or was she a stray surviving as best she could? Her thin ribs proved she wasn’t being cared for if someone did own her. Her chances of surviving the rest of the winter on her own didn’t look good. She approached as close as the drive leading into the parking lot. After pacing back and forth a few times she sat down and stared at him.
He turned to Jesse. “Do you know who that dog belongs to?”
Jesse glanced a
t her and shook his head. “I’ve seen her around. I think she’s a stray.”
“Would you happen to have anything I can feed her?”
Jesse laughed. “Are you a softhearted fellow?”
“Is there anything wrong with that if I am?”
“Nee, I like animals, too. Maybe more than most people, but I think I’m going to like you, Michael Shetler.” Jesse clapped him on the back with his massive hand, almost knocking Michael over. “There’s a couple of ham sandwiches in the refrigerator inside the office. You are welcome to them. For you or for the dog. Your choice.”
“Danki.” Michael walked into a small building with Office in a hand-lettered sign over the door. Inside he found a small refrigerator with a coffeepot sitting on top of it. He took out two of the sandwiches, happy to see they contained thick slices of ham and cheese. After taking a couple of bites from one, he walked out with the rest in his hand. The dog was still sitting in the driveway.
He walked to within a few feet of her and laid the sandwich on the ground. As soon as he moved away she jumped up and gulped down the food. Looking up, she wagged her tail, clearly wanting more.
“Sorry, that’s all there is. We are two of a kind, it seems. You needed a handout and so did I. We have Jesse over there to thank for sharing his lunch.” Michael chuckled. He had teased Bethany about talking to her cow but here he was talking to a dog. It was too bad Bethany wasn’t here to share the joke.
What surprised him was how much he wanted to see her again.
* * *
Jeffrey Morgan’s home was a little more than a mile farther up the road from Bethany’s house. As she pulled in she saw Jeffrey’s mother getting out of her car. When she caught sight of Bethany she approached the buggy hesitantly.
“Good afternoon, Mrs. Morgan.” Bethany stepped down from the buggy unsure of what to say.
“You are Ivan’s mother, aren’t you?” The woman remained a few feet away.
“I’m his older sister. Our mother passed away some years ago.”
“That’s right. Jeffrey told me that. I’m sorry about your grandfather. Jeffrey was fond of him.”
An Amish Wife for Christmas Page 3