by Becky Harmon
“Go away,” Sarah said loudly.
Regan was silent and Sarah couldn’t resist looking again. Regan had stepped back from the door and when she saw Sarah’s face she lifted her arms in surrender.
“Just listen, okay?”
She continued when Sarah’s face didn’t leave the window.
“I’m an undercover police officer. I had to leave earlier for a case. I’m sorry I didn’t explain before I left.”
Sarah’s head spun. Why did Regan come home with her then? Was kissing her some part of an undercover assignment? Regan’s words weren’t making sense to her. She stared at the badge hanging around Regan’s neck and she began to understand. Regan had used her. She didn’t know why but she didn’t like the vulnerable way she was feeling.
Regan placed her hand against the window. “I’m very sorry. Can you forgive me for deceiving you?”
Sarah stepped away from the window, letting the curtain fall. No, no she couldn’t forgive her. She had never allowed anyone to walk all over her like Regan had done tonight and she wasn’t going to allow it again. Sarah turned and climbed the stairs. Regan rang the doorbell a few more times and then the silence filled Sarah’s house with an empty loneliness.
* * *
Regan sank on to the steps of Sarah’s house. Why had everything she had done concerning Sarah gone all wrong? Apparently Sarah wasn’t willing to forgive her. She dropped her forehead into her hands. This was all wrong. She wasn’t trying to meet a woman tonight but the woman she had met was more than any woman she had ever met before. Regan could admit that at least. Sarah was an impressive woman and she longed to be inside the house with her. The warmth and comfort she had felt just sitting and talking with Sarah was more of a connection than Regan had ever felt with anyone.
She knew she had exhausted her attempt for tonight. Sarah wasn’t ready to listen to her——and maybe she never would be—but Regan prayed she would. She stood and walked back to her car, glancing at the dark house before driving away.
Nate hurried over when she walked into the station. “Chief says go home and get some sleep. We can start questioning him tomorrow. Burns is pulling all of his background information and that will be ready when we come in. See you at noon?”
Regan nodded. She knew she wouldn’t be able to sleep when she got home but she flagged down a cab outside the station and gave her address. She leaned her head back and closed her eyes. She hadn’t spent the night in her own bed in weeks. Short trips for a shower and food were all she had allowed herself. When she wasn’t on the street she had been at the office pouring over the reports, trying to catch a murderer. Now he was caught. The cold look on his face flashed into her mind and she shook her head to clear it. After years of police work, she had learned never to let a criminal get under her skin but this guy had. She had thought when she caught him that she would be able to discard her emotions like every other case before. Meadows didn’t have an ounce of compassion and Regan was haunted by the look on his face.
The cab pulled to a stop in front of her house and Regan stared at the dark windows. This wasn’t where she wanted to be on Christmas. She wanted the comforting warmth of Sarah and her inviting fireplace. She gave the cab driver Sarah’s address and closed her eyes again while he drove through the empty streets.
Chapter Six
Sarah rolled over at the sound of the slamming car door. She had been tossing and turning for over an hour and it felt like days. She had immediately regretted her earlier decision not to allow Regan in the house. There was a connection she couldn’t ignore and she wanted to hear Regan explain her actions. She froze as the familiar knock sounded throughout the house. Regan! She jumped out of bed and bolted down the stairs. An hour of dreaming about Regan and how it might feel to have her in her bed and Sarah no longer cared about Regan’s deception. She wanted to hold her and feel the electricity when they touched again.
Never imagining it could be anyone outside her door other than Regan, Sarah whipped open her front door and pulled Regan inside. The shocked look on Regan’s face almost made her laugh. Regan responded instantly when Sarah pushed her against the wall, pressing their bodies hard together. Their lips met amidst a tangle of arms and legs. Sarah hesitated when her hands brushed the cold steel inside Regan’s shirt.
She watched as Regan quickly pulled the pistol from her shoulder holster and unloaded it, dropping pistol and clip into her coat pocket. She removed her coat and tossed it onto the floor beside the couch. When she stepped out of her boots and jeans, Sarah picked up her jeans and waited while Regan pulled off her shirt to reveal she still wore Sarah’s sweatshirt. She took the discarded garments and placed them in the washer.
When she returned Regan stood in front of the fire place in her boy briefs and a tank top. The vision took Sarah’s breath away. In all her life she had never had a one-night stand. Every night she had spent with a woman meant something to her and she had spent time getting to know them before it had reached this point. She didn’t know much of anything about Regan and she was shocked that at the moment she didn’t even care. Her body pushed her forward and she wrapped her arms around Regan’s waist, holding their bodies tight against each other. She breathed deeply kissing, Regan’s neck before speaking softly into her ear.
“I know nothing about you, but I don’t seem to care.”
Sarah could feel Regan’s cheek wrinkle in a smile and she kissed it. The smile faded as Sarah ran her hands over Regan’s chest.
Regan moaned and spun in Sarah’s arms, pushing them down onto the sofa. By the time, Sarah had shifted the cushions out from under her, Regan had stripped her of all clothing. She pushed Regan’s tank top over her head and slid her hand inside Regan’s boxers. Sarah’s body exploded as Regan sucked first one nipple and then the other into her mouth. She pushed hard into Regan’s thigh as she stroked Regan to climax with her.
Regan continued to move against Sarah until she didn’t think her body would respond again but she was shocked each time she felt the stirring inside her. She watched Regan’s eyes dance in the firelight until the sunlight began to push through the window. She remembered once Regan had crossed naked to the fire and placed another log on it to keep the fire going. Sarah had watched the muscles ripple as she moved and she couldn’t remember ever seeing anything so beautiful.
* * *
The fantasy of the night began to clear as Regan’s body screamed for coffee. Her head rested on Sarah’s chest, their legs entwined beneath a throw blanket Regan had pulled over them in the night. Her hands found solid ground beneath Sarah and she pushed herself away from the warm body beneath her.
Sarah groaned and pulled at Regan to return.
“Coffee,” Regan murmured. She stumbled into Sarah’s kitchen and opened every cabinet until she found what she was looking for. Once the coffee machine was humming softly, Regan returned to the living room. Sarah watched her as she pulled boxers and her tank top back on.
“I need to get back to the station.”
Sarah nodded.
“Can I come back?”
Sarah nodded again before standing and pulling on her clothes.
Regan took her remaining clothes with her to the bathroom. Sarah hadn’t said anything to her this morning and Regan wasn’t sure where they stood. She was pleased that Sarah seemed open to her returning though. Maybe then they would be able to talk about what had happened.
Regan knew something was wrong when she stepped into the kitchen. The aroma of coffee filled her senses but the look on Sarah’s face made her want to run.
“What?” Regan asked.
“Why me?”
“What?”
“Why did you come home with me?”
“You invited me.”
“Right.” Sarah tapped the newspaper in front of her. “But why did you agree. You were working a case but you left and came here. Why?”
Regan rubbed her face. Could she tell Sarah about the potential female accomplice? As far as s
he knew it hadn’t been released to the public. Besides she wasn’t sure how Sarah would take the information that she had been a suspect, if only for a little while. She walked toward the front door and picked her shoulder holster off the floor, sliding her arms into the straps. Pulling her pistol and clip from her coat pocket she loaded it and chambered a round before sliding it into her holster. She turned to face Sarah.
“I can’t talk about an ongoing investigation.”
“Fine. Then tell me this: if you suspected I was a murderer then why did you kiss me?”
Regan wasn’t sure what to say. Was because I wanted to an answer Sarah would accept?
“Just go, Regan.” Sarah crossed to the front door and held it open. “Just go.”
“I didn’t mean for this to happen. I mean I didn’t expect to feel this way.”
Sarah shook her head and said so softly Regan could barely hear her. “Just go.”
* * *
For the second time in the same day Sarah was in turmoil. She couldn’t understand how Regan could think she was a murderer. Their night of passion was totally destroyed by Regan’s betrayal. When Regan had first kissed her, the police didn’t have a suspect in custody yet. Regan was in her home investigating her as a potential suspect. Her phone rang but she ignored it. She picked up the paper and began reading the article again. The first time she had only skimmed it once she saw Regan’s name. Now she read every word.
The article repeated the words of Regan’s supervisor as he praised her diligence in pursuing the murderer. He went on to explain how due to evidence found at the last crime scene they had broadened their search to include a potential female accomplice. Sarah read the words again and she thought about how odd it must seem that she invited a homeless woman into her home. Her phone beeped that she had a voice mail and she picked it up. The message was from her mother wishing her a Merry Christmas. Sarah laid the phone down as she realized it was Christmas. She remembered her feelings of wanting to do the right thing when she had invited Regan into her home.
Regan must have thought she was a lunatic inviting a homeless person into her home. No wonder she was a suspect. She didn’t want to believe that Regan had ever really suspected her but it didn’t matter. Regan knew when she returned that Sarah wasn’t involved and she came back on her own. For now that had to be enough. Regan hadn’t said anything about coming back when she left this time. Sarah needed to make sure Regan would return when she could. It was Christmas after all.
Sarah showered and dressed in comfortable jeans and a sweatshirt. She couldn’t just sit at the house and wait. She parked in visitor parking at the police station and climbed the steps to the front door. When she asked for Regan she was pointed to small section of the building where four desks were lumped together all facing each other. All the seats were empty but Regan’s desk was easy to identify. The tattered, dirty coat she had worn the previous night hung on the back of the chair. Sarah looked around the room and located a printer. She crossed and grabbed a piece of paper from the bin. The officers that were working in this room seemed too busy to care that she was here. She quickly wrote her phone number on the paper, signing her name below it. At least Regan would know she wanted her to call.
Sarah climbed into her car and stared out the window. She couldn’t go back home. Without Regan her house felt empty. She drove to Whitman’s and let herself in the front door. The aisles were quiet and the peace she normally found in their emptiness was just out of reach. As she walked each floor, she remembered following her grandfather as he talked about the store as if it was their family. She had never longed to have someone in her life to share things with but now thoughts of Regan were stuck in her head. She didn’t know if Regan would call but she made up her mind if she didn’t then she would track her down. There was a connection between them and Sarah wasn’t willing to let it go.
She headed for the front door. She wanted to get home and prepare a Christmas dinner. Then she would have a reason to invite Regan to her house again. There had been a few people on the street when Sarah arrived but she was surprised to see a line outside the store. She knew the closed sign was displayed but they must have seen her walking around inside. Christmas dinner would have to wait. She needed to take care of the family that had always taken care of her. Sarah quickly crossed the sales floor and opened the door.
* * *
“Nice job, Regan.”
Regan gave the chief a tired smile. She couldn’t believe how easily Meadows had given his confession. He didn’t seem worried that he was about to spend the rest of his life behind bars. Regan dropped into her chair and stared at the clutter on her desk. She began stacking and sorting files when a piece of printer paper caught her eye. Her name was written on the outside of the folded sheet. She opened it and smiled. Grabbing the paper, she gave Nate a wave and bolted from the station.
Sarah’s house was dark and Regan gave up ringing the doorbell after a few minutes. Clearly Sarah wasn’t home. She hurried back to her car. If Sarah wasn’t at home, there was only one other place she would be on Christmas.
Regan parked on the curb in front of Whitman’s Department Store. She was surprised to see the lights on and customers milling around inside. She quickly found Sarah in the middle of a cash transaction. Her face lit up when she saw Regan.
“Can I help?” Regan asked, looking around at the customers waiting to check out.
Sarah leaned close. “Write down what they bought here.” She pointed to a tablet she was carrying. “Round everything down to the whole dollar, I don’t have any small change. Unless you know how to make a credit card sale.”
“I can handle this.” Regan stepped behind the counter beside Sarah. “I can take the next customer over here.” She called to the customers waiting in line.
Regan processed the credit cards and Sarah handled the cash transactions. They touched occasionally as they maneuvered around each other in the small space behind the counter. When the area around them was finally empty, Sarah locked the front doors and pressed the digital speaker to play an announcement that the store was now closed in case anyone else was still inside. They leaned against the counter and stared at each other.
“That was fun,” Sarah said her face flushed with pleasure.
“We made a lot of people happy by taking their money.” Regan’s eyes searched Sarah’s face. She would give anything to make things right between them. “I’m really sorry about how everything got so messed up.”
“I’m sorry too.”
Regan stepped toward her, tucking a strand of Sarah’s hair behind her ear. She kissed her gently. “How long do we have to stay here?”
Sarah smiled. “Aren’t you having fun? I was thinking about doing this every year.”
“It was fun but next year you’re going to be busy.”
“I am?”
“Yes, next year I plan on spending Christmas Day in bed.”
“It’s still Christmas Day.” Sarah’s voice was muffled as she snuggled deeper into Regan’s coat.
“Can we go now?” Regan asked.
“Yes, but first we have to do something.” Sarah grasped Regan’s hand and began pulling her through the store.
“Make sure everyone is gone?”
“No, find you a new coat.”
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