‘What did you do yesterday?’ Nonna asked. ‘I didn’t think to ask last night because I was so tired.’
‘I made a friend.’
Grandma’s eyebrows rose. ‘A friend like Joe?’
‘No, no.’ Sophia laughed. ‘Phoebe Donovan. She runs a wedding planning company in Malcesine. She’s really nice.’
‘That is good. It is nice for you to have a friend here. I mean, a female friend.’
‘She’s lovely. She’s married to an Italian and they live in Verona. She’s very happy here.’
Nonna nodded. ‘I told you Italian men make good husbands. Well…’ She pressed her lips together. ‘Some of them.’
‘I’m not looking for a husband, Nonna, I told you that already.’ She laughed. ‘After what Lee did and deciding to make such a big change in my life by leaving my job, I just want to get to know myself again. Where I come from…’ She bit her lip, as thoughts of what she’d discovered came rushing back. ‘I mean… I know where I come from but what I meant was, who I am and what I want.’
Their coffees and pastries arrived and they enjoyed them quietly, the delicious treats melting on Sophia’s tongue and contrasting with the rich, dark bitterness of the espresso.
‘You know, there’s nothing better than eating Italian pastry washed down with strong coffee in the morning sunshine. I could get used to this, Nonna.’
‘I would love you to stay, bella. There is always a place for you in my home.’
Sophia swallowed hard as a lump rose in her throat. She was deceiving this lovely woman by not telling her what she’d discovered. It was like some kind of crazy double bluff: her nonna knew that she wasn’t her biological grandparent and Sophia knew, but neither of them was letting on. Sophia wished that she hadn’t found the letter, wished that she hadn’t read it, but she had and the responsibility of the knowledge was a weight she didn’t need right now. That she didn’t ever need. She was supposed to be getting over Lee and deciding what to do with her Economics degree and ten years in investment banking.
‘Is something troubling you, Sophia? Are you thinking of Lee?’
Sophia blinked behind her sunglasses, then shook her head. ‘I’m fine, Grandma. Just a bit tired today. I had a restless night and think I might need to nap this afternoon and catch up a bit.’
‘Of course, bella. I often do the same.’
Sophia drained her coffee then shook the pastry crumbs from her lap. An ant ambled along and took a crumb four times its size then carried it away. She smiled. Sometimes problems seemed enormous but, in reality, once you tackled them, they weren’t as big as they first appeared. Perhaps it would all be okay once the secret was out in the open. She really hoped so because at the end of the day, Katherine was the only nonna she had. A biological detail wouldn’t change their relationship; who they both were and what they felt for each other.
But still, she found herself unable to voice her thoughts and ask any questions that would risk upsetting her grandmother. It would have to wait for another day, when the sun wasn’t quite so bright, when the sky wasn’t quite so blue, and when Sophia could find the courage that she needed to turn their lives upside down.
*
Sophia paused and cocked her head. What was that noise?
And what time was it?
She pulled her mobile from her pocket. It was five o’clock.
Her thoughts clung to her like syrup to a spoon and she had to literally shake herself to try to clear her head. Then she realized what the noise was; someone was knocking the door.
She’d come out onto the upstairs verandah to try to decide what to do about what she’d found out when she’d read her nonna’s letter. One minute, she’d decide to tell her; the next, she’d decide that delaying it was best. And, through it all, she was desperate to be free of the awful knowledge that her mother had not known her real mother. It was all such a mess.
But for now, she’d have to tuck it away at the back of her mind and go answer the door before Nonna was woken from her nap.
She headed downstairs but, as she reached the bottom, she saw that her nonna was there already and was letting someone in.
‘Hello, Joe. Good to see you again. Come in!’ Nonna stood back and let Joe into the hallway, then closed the door. ‘Sophia, we have a guest.’
Sophia pushed her hair back from her face. ‘Oh… hello.’ The way Joe had been when she’d last seen him cleared the rest of the fog from her mind and replaced it with a sudden vulnerability. She didn’t want to see him again without being prepared and certainly not when she’d just been dragged from such troubling thoughts.
‘Sorry, did I disturb you both?’ He looked from Nonna to Sophia, a small line between his brows deepening as realisation dawned.
‘It’s okay, Joe, don’t worry. I would have risen soon or else I’d never have been able to sleep tonight. I will make coffee. Why don’t you two go and sit in the lounge?’ Nonna ambled off and Sophia, not knowing what else to do, gestured at the doorway. Joe followed her through.
Sophia sat near the window and Joe stood by the fireplace, his hands deep in his jean pockets. ‘Uh, look, I uh… wanted to apologize. For how I was yesterday. I didn’t mean to be so rude.’
Sophia shrugged. ‘Don’t worry about it. We all have bad days.’
‘Yes, but you didn’t deserve that. I’d just taken a disturbing phone call and I was in a bad mood and I took it out on you. Anyway, I’m sorry. I’m not usually so grumpy.’
‘No?’ Sophia watched him carefully as he moved from one foot to the other on the tiled floor. He was wearing the same shoes as the day before and a white t-shirt that made his tanned face appear the colour of warm honey. When he turned his eyes to her, their green was so intense that her breath caught in her throat. She wanted to be a bit angry at him, just a bit, but he was so handsome and seemed so sincere that she was struggling to summon even a flicker of annoyance. And what would be the point anyway? Why be angry at him when he was apologizing? It would be far more pleasant to just let bygones be bygones and move on. He didn’t owe her anything and she liked him, so keeping him there was preferable to throwing him out on the street.
‘No.’ Small pink dots appeared on his cheeks beneath the tan. ‘Do you want to give me a hard time? Because if you do, I’ll completely understand. I deserve it.’ He offered a cracked smile and Sophia felt her own lips turning up.
‘No, I don’t want to give you a hard time and you don’t deserve it.’
‘So are we friends?’
‘Of course.’
‘Well in that case, how do you fancy getting out on the lake tomorrow? It’s my afternoon off and I’ve got the use of a friend’s speedboat.’
‘That sounds great. Will your friend be joining us?’
Joe shook his head. ‘It would just be us… you and me. Is that okay?’
Sophia pressed her hands to her stomach to try to control the fizz of excitement that was bubbling there. An afternoon on the lake with Joe sounded amazing. Just the two of them, away from everything else, kind of like a date.
‘Yes, that’s fine.’
‘What is fine?’ Nonna asked as she entered bearing a tray with three espresso cups and the coffee pot.
‘I just asked Sophia if she’d like to come out on a speedboat tomorrow, to see the lake from a different perspective. If that’s all right with you too?’
‘Of course it’s all right with me,’ Nonna said, flashing Sophia a smile. ‘Sophia is an adult and she can make her own decisions without asking me. But thank you for showing me such courtesy.’
As Nonna poured coffee then handed them cups, Sophia hugged herself tight. Joe had come to apologize and, even better, he’d asked her out. Probably just as a friend, of course, but it made something inside her lift. The thought of Joe being off with her had made her sad. He’d entered her life with a bang and made a big impression. There was something about him that was so earnest, so strong and so bright that she didn’t want to lose him; he
had a part to play in her life now, or at least in her summer at the lake, and she wanted to enjoy finding out exactly what that part was.
Chapter 12
As Sophia descended the stairs the next day, her heart was thundering and her stomach was knotted with anticipation.
Today she was going out on a speedboat with Joe.
On the lake.
Eeeekkkk!!!
Sophia found Nonna in the kitchen, already dressed and making breakfast.
‘Ah, Sophia, I thought you’d be up earlier today.’
‘What time did you get up?’
‘An hour ago. Maybe more.’ She waved a hand as if it didn’t matter.
‘Weren’t you tired?’
‘Not today, bella. But I have days like that. My mind was too busy to rest this morning.’
‘Mine too.’
‘Of course, you have the speedboat date today.’ Nonna winked.
‘Well I wouldn’t exactly call it a date.’
‘It is a date, bella. A date with a very handsome friend.’
‘If you like.’
Sophia sat down and accepted a coffee.
‘Why couldn’t you sleep?’
Her nonna shrugged. ‘Sometimes I think about life, sometimes I miss the warm body of my husband next to me and sometimes I’m just hungry.’
‘You still miss snuggling up to Nonno?’
‘Always. Once you have known the love of a good man, bella, you will always miss their warmth. He’s been gone many years but sometimes I roll over and feel his imprint on the mattress. Sometimes I hear him sigh. At others, I feel his arms around me in the night but when I wake… he’s gone.’
Sophia’s throat tightened. ‘Oh, Nonna, I’m sorry.’
‘Don’t be. I am lucky to have loved and been loved like that. Even when our passion didn’t burn as brightly as it did when we were younger, I still enjoyed being close to him. I miss him every day, but that is the price I pay for loving him so deeply.’ She sat next to Sophia and pushed a plate of warm rolls in front of her. ‘I do hope you will be able to love like that. There is nothing better.’
Sophia picked up a roll and tore it in half, then buttered both pieces. ‘But I’m happy now.’
Her nonna reached out and stroked her cheek. ‘Happy, beautiful and young. You have so much ahead of you, tesoro.’
‘So do you.’
‘Maybe. But if I live to see you happily settled or pursuing your dream career, or whatever it is that you want to do, then I will be happy.’
‘I’m really glad I came to stay.’
‘I’m molto felice you came too. I have missed you. Now, eat up because you will need your strength. Will you be swimming?’
‘Oooh! I don’t know.’ Sophia did a quick mental flick through the clothing that she’d brought with her and remembered that Kaisha had insisted that she bring the new bikinis she’d bought. Thank goodness for her sister-in-law. ‘We might, I guess.’
‘Well make sure that you wear sunscreen as you can still burn even in the water.’
‘Yes, Grandma. I have a bottle there. Luca’s wife picked one out for me. She said it’s a very good brand and has the UV filters and all that.’
‘The bella Kaisha. She sends me photos of the girls. They are bellisimo!’
‘Yes, they are. And so precocious. Especially Summer, who can be such a bossy-boots.’
Nonna laughed. ‘I wish you lived closer. It would be nice to see them more often.’
Sophia watched her carefully. ‘They’d enjoy seeing you too.’
‘Perhaps one day…’ Nonna got up and went to the sink where she started rinsing dishes. ‘Now, Sophia, tell me what you are going to wear. You want to look nice for your date but must make sure that you feel comfortable. Sometimes, even when it’s warm, the breeze blowing across the lake can be cold.’
‘Cold?’
‘Yes, especially if you are wet from the lake.’
‘I’ll make sure I take a pashmina.’
‘Good, good.’
Three hours later, Sophia had showered, washed and dried her hair and she had changed four times. She’d finally settled on a black bikini embroidered with silver stars, a pair of cropped black linen trousers and a purple halter top. She packed a silver pashmina in her oversized beach bag with her towel. She had lathered herself in the suncream Kaisha had told her to buy and she popped it in her bag too so she could top up later on. It had a bit of a strange smell to it, something akin to biscuits and curry, but she hoped that would fade before she met up with Joe. Anyway, it wasn’t exactly as if he’d be getting close enough to sniff her, now, was it?
She twisted her clean hair into a ponytail, put on her floppy straw hat, then slicked on some tinted lip balm.
‘All this effort for a friend, eh?’ she said to her reflection. But she had to admit that she did feel good and that the bikini flattered her curves. She usually paid so little attention to clothes but since she’d left England, and Lee, she was enjoying taking more interest in dressing herself, selecting items from her wonderful new wardrobe – her ‘new me’ clothes. Perhaps it was the sunshine and the more relaxed atmosphere out in Italy, perhaps it was because she didn’t know many people, or perhaps it was because something in her was changing. Whatever it was down to, she was enjoying it, though she wasn’t sure she’d feel that way if it came to stripping down to her bikini in front of Joe to take a dip in the lake or sunbathe on the boat.
Her stomach flipped.
‘Come on now, Joe must be used to seeing bikini-clad women all summer long.’
But she couldn’t help wondering if he’d be taking a swim and, if so, what he’d look like without his clothes on. Would he wear shorts or, please no, speedos? The tiny trunks, or budgie smugglers – as her brothers called them – were just too comical, even on Adonis-bodied Olympic divers. She really hoped Joe didn’t go in for those or she’d struggle to keep a straight face.
*
Joe stood on the wooden dock of the harbour looking out at the lake. It was so pretty; a view he could see every day and never tire of. Of course, he’d have to return home soon, but for now he intended on making the most of the scenery. And of what Lake Garda had to offer. Including Sophia’s company.
And there she was. Walking down towards the harbour. With her face hidden behind those giant sunglasses and the floppy-brimmed hat, she reminded him of a film star trying to remain incognito; a combination of Marisa Tomei and Penelope Cruz perhaps. There was something so elegant about her as she approached, in her cool cropped trousers and purple top, and she made his heartbeat quicken. He had to stop himself hurrying to greet her. He didn’t want to seem over-eager when he was trying to play it cool.
If only things were different…
But even if he could never offer something long term, he could offer her the summer.
Joe lifted a hand and gave what he hoped was a casual wave and Sophia returned it with a smile. He gestured at the bright red speedboat he’d borrowed from a friend of his uncle. He’d helped the man to move house and been offered use of the boat in return. Joe had had a test run, to make sure that he could drive it, and it ran like a dream, so now he was looking forward to taking Sophia out on the lake and getting to know her a bit better.
Perhaps a lot better.
‘Good morning!’ Sophia reached him and he had to take a deep breath to steady himself.
‘Good morning. You look… really nice.’
‘Thank you.’
‘But…’ He peered at her closely. ‘Did you spend a lot of time in the sun yesterday?’
She frowned. ‘A bit in Limone but we sat in the shade when we had lunch. Why? Am I burned?’
‘Not exactly.’ He shook his head. ‘But you’ve definitely got more colour than you had last night.’
‘Oh.’ Sophia held up her arm but shook her head. ‘Perhaps I did tan a bit. With my colouring, I tend to go brown rather than red anyway.’
‘So are you ready?’
&nb
sp; ‘As I’ll ever be.’ She chewed her bottom lip.
‘Are you nervous?’
‘No.’
‘Sure?’
‘Well a little bit but only because I’m not a strong swimmer.’
‘I’m sure there’s a lifejacket on there if you need it. And I’m a qualified lifeguard, so you’ll be safe with me.’
‘A lifeguard, eh?’
‘Teenage years spent at the local pool.’
‘Well I’ll put my life in your hands then, Joe.’
He gave her a small salute, which he instantly felt awkward about, because when did he ever salute anyone?
He climbed into the speedboat then held out a hand to Sophia. She wobbled a bit so he helped her to sit down.
‘It’s very nice, isn’t it?’ She ran a hand over the leather seat.
‘Something to aspire to.’
‘Where can I put my bag?’
‘Just tuck it under the seat. It should be fine.’
Sophia did as he suggested then he sat in the driver’s seat. ‘You ready?’
‘Sure. Just look back regularly to check that I’m still here, won’t you?’
‘I will.’ He flashed her a smile then pulled away from the harbour.
*
Sophia gripped the seat tightly as the boat cut through the water. She was going through a range of emotions: excitement at being on a speedboat, nerves at the thought of falling off, happiness at being out on such a beautiful sunny day and anxiety at the thought of whether they would end up going for a swim.
But as she looked at Joe, she couldn’t help but feel reassured. He was, after all, a qualified lifeguard, so her own lack of skill in the water wouldn’t matter as long as he stayed close. Also, he was so at ease, so self-assured, that she couldn’t help but feel more relaxed in his company. She should just enjoy this experience rather than fearing what could happen. Did she always fear the worst? Was that one of the things that had held her back all these years? Instead of living life to the full, had she been hiding from it, immersing herself in a career that didn’t give her time to live a real life and tying herself to a man who didn’t love her so she wouldn’t have to face falling in love? Because falling in love was dangerous, risky, and while Sophia had been comfortable taking risks with other people’s money, taking risks with her heart was something she hadn’t wanted to do.
Love at the Italian Lake Page 10