by JoAnn Durgin
“What about your Grandma Carlisle?”
“She died from breast cancer when she was in her early 50s. Grandpa never remarried, and I think he poured a lot of his leftover pain into his work. His acting on the stage was brilliant, even better than his films, in my opinion. That raw emotion was almost tangible, and it lent an air of authenticity to his performance that most actors never achieve.”
“Did you see him perform often?”
“Whenever he was in a new play, he’d always send us tickets for the front row. Grandpa was a strong Christian and something of an enigma to his peers because of it. I never heard him say a swear word—onstage or off—and the characters he portrayed never acted immorally without clearly showing the consequences. He stood by his personal convictions and understood the importance of a man’s word. Integrity and honesty meant everything. Like my dad, he was a hero to me. I hope I can do them both proud and eventually become half the man they hoped I’d be.”
Mitch’s chest rose and fell with his sigh. Shifting her position, Cassie faced him. “You’re becoming the man God wants you to be, Mitch, and I know your dad and grandfather would be very proud of you.”
“Thanks.” She glimpsed the gratitude in his expression, felt it in his smile.
“Your turn. Tell me about your parents.” Mitch intertwined their fingers.
Cassie turned her head, unable to look him in the eye, hoping he wouldn’t think less of her once she told him the truth. “My mom tried hard to be a good mother, but she became too dependent on a bottle for comfort when Daddy wasn’t around. She had a deep faith when I was a little girl. She’d dress me up like a doll, ironically enough”—she caught Mitch’s smile—“and march me off to Sunday school every week, rain or shine. With Grandma Thor. We walked to church most of the time since whatever car we had at the time usually wasn’t reliable. Then, when Tagg died, Mama shut down, closed inside herself.” Her eyes misted when Mitch took her hand, stroking his thumb over hers. “She died five years ago. Acute alcohol poisoning. I tried so many times to help her, but she pushed me away. Pushed everyone away.”
“What about your dad?” She’d removed her hand from his, but he took it again and idly traced the lines on her palm with the tip of his finger.
“He managed to get himself thrown in jail a lot for various and assorted misdemeanor crimes. Petty stuff, really, but crimes all the same. Daddy became known as ‘No Felonies Thorenson.’ It was his claim to fame and he took some warped sense of pride in the nickname.”
“I’m sorry, Cassie. That must have been tough.”
“Tagg was my greatest supporter. He always believed in me and made it bearable.”
“And Grandma Thor, too, right?”
“She was, yes. Looking on the bright side, we didn’t always have food on the table, and we didn’t have new clothes very often, but we weren’t physically or verbally abused.” She shrugged. “It could have been a lot worse, and Tagg and I did the best we could with what we had. For a long time, we didn’t know we were that different from anyone else. Tagg won over everyone and made it okay, even acceptable, to be poor, as weird as that might sound.”
Mitch pushed aside a long strand of her hair that had fallen across her cheek and gently tucked it behind her ear. “Did you feel like you were living in Tagg’s shadow?”
“A little, but I never minded. Why? Did Amy hate living in the shadow of her handsome, intelligent older brother?”
His smile made her weak all over again. She was a goner. “Celeste more than Amy. You think I’m handsome?”
She swatted him. “Of course not. I only marry ugly boys. Makes it easier since I don’t have to fight off all the other girls.”
Mitch caught her hand and his smile sobered. What was on his mind now? She’d learned Mitch could change the topic in a heartbeat. “Something wrong?”
“No, but I’m hoping you’ll tell me more about Tagg.”
She swallowed hard. “Okay.”
“I don’t want to make you sad, but I want to know you better. I think a lot of your history, a lot of who you are today, has to do with your brother.”
Again, Mitch had zeroed in that part of her she’d tried to keep hidden for so many years. Obliging him, Cassie scooted close again. “He was in a boat with some friends on the lake closest to our house. I sat on the dock, watching them. One of the girls started hollering for help and waving her arms. She wasn’t wearing a lifejacket. Tagg jumped in to save her. Turns out, she was trying to get his attention, and it worked.”
She hung her head and, as much as she wanted to stop them, a few tears escaped. “I felt left out and decided to try the same ploy. I wasn’t wearing a lifejacket either, but”—she took a gulping breath—“I really couldn’t swim, but I sort of knew how to tread water. I called to my big brother to come save me, and sure enough, he dove in the water again.”
Cassie choked down a small sob. Since the time of the accident, she’d never told anyone the details, afraid to relive that horrible scene. “Another boater saw me calling for help in the water and sped in my direction. Tagg didn’t see the boat, and. . .” She sniffled and paused to catch her breath. “The boater jumped in and got me out of the water, but it was too late for Tagg.”
“Oh, Cassie,” Mitch said, stroking her hair as she cried. “I can’t even imagine what that must have been like for you.”
“I killed him, Mitch. If I hadn’t acted so selfishly by trying to get his attention, Tagg would still be here.” Her sobs came out in anguished waves and she was helpless to stop them.
“You can’t know that. It was a tragic accident.” Mitch’s calm, gentle voice was a soothing balm for her weary soul.
“I always felt like Mama and Daddy blamed me. After Tagg died, she more or less spent most of her time curled up with her bottle and Daddy went off on his little crime sprees. Sometimes I think he wanted to be thrown in jail so he wouldn’t have to come home and face her and. . .me.” The last word rushed out on a sob.
Cassie pulled back and wiped her hands beneath her eyes. “Oh, look at your shirt. I’m so sorry.” She put one hand on the spot near his shoulder where she’d soaked it clean through with her tears.
“I don’t care about that. What I care about is you,” he said. “Have you carried this around inside you for all these years?” His eyes held compassion in their depths.
“It’s my deepest shame. I haven’t shared it with anyone else because I’m afraid they’d call me a. . .a murderer or something.”
“You were a kid trying to get her big brother’s attention. Speaking as a big brother, in identical circumstances, I would have done the same thing as Tagg. And, as horrible as it was, it was a blessing he didn’t linger and suffer. That would have been harder on everyone, especially you.”
She sniffled some more. “Tagg died a hero and the governor came to his funeral. He broke a lot of hearts when he died.”
Mitch tipped her chin. “None more so than his little sister’s.”
Her eyes filled with tears again and when he opened his arms, she willingly fell into them. “I’m here for you, Cassie,” he said. “Whatever you need.”
“Thank you,” she murmured, closing her eyes. “I’m really glad you’re here.”
Mitch was what she needed. She just hadn’t known it until now.
Chapter
20
Cassie rubbed her eyes and yawned. Where am I?
She was lying on her right side beneath the blanket—now coated with heavy morning frost—and her sweater was bunched beneath her head as a makeshift pillow.
I’m not alone.
Almost afraid to look, she turned her head and bumped noses with Mitch. Also on his right side, he was asleep with his arm draped around her. Holding her. He’d been. . .spooning her!
This can’t be happening!
Giving his arm a gentle nudge, Cassie tossed the blanket aside. A glance at her dress confirmed it was a wrinkled mess. Her shoes sat on the edge of the blanket, and
the crumpled bag containing the remains of their picnic was still parked beneath the tree. “Mitch,” she said, a sharp edge in her voice as she shook his shoulder. “Mitch. Wake up!”
“What’s wrong?” Opening his eyes and yawning loudly, he blinked hard a few times. Propping himself up, he rested his weight on his elbows. “Where are we?” He grimaced and winced, rubbing his shoulder. “I figured I’d feel the effects of being bowled over by that linebacker yesterday.”
She smoothed both palms over her hair. “I’m sure sleeping on the ground didn’t help.” With a frustrated sigh, she gestured at their surroundings. “I can’t believe we slept here all night! You’d think a cop might have come along to wake us up and send us home.”
“Considering we’ve seen three cops since yesterday, you’d think so.” Sitting up, Mitch rubbed one hand over his face before slapping both stubbled cheeks. “Well, this is quite a situation. At least no serial killer decided to stop by.”
“This is not amusing.” Cassie jumped to her feet and grabbed her shoes. Hopping on one foot, she pulled the strap of her sandal over her right heel before tugging on the left shoe. “I’ll never be able to live this down.”
“Forgive me if this is a dumb question, but why does anyone have to know?” From his tone, it was obvious Mitch thought she was overreacting.
Cassie rested her hands on her hips. “Are you serious? Sam knows things like this. I swear the man’s got some kind of radar. I mean, sure, he’s loving and a great leader, but he can be tough. And Amy!” She started pacing. “This can’t be good.”
“Don’t worry about Amy. I can handle her.”
“Yes, but. . .oh, I hate this because she’s your sister. She’ll probably think I’m some wanton woman out to snag her brother.”
Mitch laughed, but he stopped when she shot him a warning glance. “Cassie, you’re like the last woman on the planet who would try to lure me into—”
“Did you say lure? Like into my lair or”—she gasped—“my. . .my bed?”
He chuckled low in his throat, incensing her even more. “No one’s going to think that. I happen to think you’re the sexiest woman I’ve ever met, but you’re even more so because you don’t purposely flaunt it. Besides that, you don’t have an insincere or dishonest bone in your body.”
He thinks I’m sexy? Well, that was a first, but she didn’t have time to dwell on it. She wasn’t sure whether to be mad or how to react.
Mitch yawned again and glanced at his watch. “Seven o’clock. Still early. Here’s the plan: you’ll drop me off in front of the house and I’ll sneak inside. No one will be any the wiser. Although Sam probably locks his front door at night.” He shrugged. “Not a big deal. If it is, I’ll see if the side door’s unlocked.”
“Sam will be up. The man rises at the crack of dawn, raring to go. He’ll be in the kitchen, reading the paper and drinking his morning coffee. The person I really don’t want to see for once in my life.”
“Relax,” he said, yawning again. “They’ll probably assume I’m upstairs in their guest bedroom and you’re home snuggled in your own bed.”
“And if they see you come in the door?”
His frown revealed his growing frustration. “Then I’ll tell them the truth.”
Cassie considered that for a moment. “You’re right. Sam may actually be a lot more understanding than Amy, and she and Landon are staying with Winnie and Josh. Have you checked your phone lately?”
He took his phone out of his pocket. “No, considering I’ve been asleep. I turned it off after Amy called. I never turned it on again for the simple fact I didn’t want us to be interrupted.”
She sighed. “I turned off my phone for the ceremony since I didn’t want the phone going off during something so important. Then I think I turned it off again after Winnie called.”
“Then maybe subconsciously you didn’t want to be interrupted either. Three calls from Amy,” he said, checking the phone. “How about you?”
Was Mitch correct in his assumption? She’d told him more about her family than she’d confided in her closest friends, Rebekah included. Although Mitch had shared some things with her, she’d been the one doing most of the talking. He’d listened to her, dried her tears, and consoled her. What a saint to put up with such a needy, emotional wreck.
Her purse had been tucked halfway beneath her during the night. Grabbing it, Cassie tugged out her phone and quickly perused the list of calls. “One from Beck, one from Winnie, and one from Amy. Oh wait. Another one from Beck.” A wave of fear coursed through her. “We’re going to have some explaining to do. They’re probably gathering at Sam and Lexa’s right now.”
“If anything, they’re probably worried for our safety,” he said. “And for that, I’m sorry. Look, Sam and Lexa trust you, and I hope they know me well enough to trust me. If they’re up when we get back to the house, maybe Lexa can run interference if Sam starts an interrogation. We’re adults and it’s not like we’re prone to wanton behavior.”
“Speak for yourself.” She didn’t like the amusement in his voice, but her barb was uncalled for and unkind. Judgmental. Would she never learn? “Sorry,” she mumbled.
“Not a problem.” Eyeing her with a raised brow, Mitch reached for his leather shoes and started to put them on. “Great. They’re wet from the frost and now I can’t get them on. The leather must have shrunk.” He grunted and peeled off his socks.
“I guess we’d better face the music, take it like adults”—Cassie raised both hands in the air—“and every other cliché we can think of to describe this situation. I’ve never been in a. . .a compromising position like this before. No off-color comments about that one, please.”
“Wouldn’t think of it,” Mitch said. “You know what? Don’t listen to the voice mail messages. They’ll only agitate you more. Let’s not even call them since it’s so early and we’ll be back at the house soon enough. For now, you need to try and relax. You’re all worked up, and that’s not doing anyone any good.” Mitch scrambled to his feet and walked to stand in front of her. “I vote we tell them the truth. We slept together and time got away from us.”
She groaned. “Not funny, Mitch. Spare me the crass jokes, please.”
“I’m not trying to be crass and I’ll take the full brunt of the blame if our actions are questioned. I’m not trying to be distasteful or disrespectful, but technically? Yeah, we did sleep together, but it was completely innocent. An honest mistake. Could happen to anyone.”
“Yes, for a couple of lunatics! Which is exactly what they’ll think. See what being around you for two days has done to me? Two days, Mitch! I can’t even fathom being around you longer than that.”
“That’s not the impression I got last night. If it’s more palatable to you, I could rephrase and say we fell asleep together. Still means the same thing.” Mitch swept the blanket off the ground. Walking a few feet away, he shook it out and then began to fold it.
Cassie blindly watched his actions while her mind whirled with plausible explanations for their overnight absence. How could he be so calm and act as if nothing happened? Shrug it off like her reputation wasn’t hanging on the line?
The stubble on Mitch’s handsome face was way too appealing, a fact which irritated her. Ditto the lazy grin. He had the folded blanket under his arm and ran his hand quickly over his hair. “At the risk of incurring more of your wrath, I really enjoyed last night.”
“That’s beside the point. Don’t even go there.” Yes, she’d enjoyed it, too, but she wasn’t about to give him the satisfaction. Fuming, Cassie grabbed her purse and car keys.
When she reached for the blanket, Mitch put his hand on her arm. “I’ve got it. Let’s go.”
She stopped a minute later as they approached the edge of the park. “Oh, good grief. We left the car in the restaurant parking lot. We’d better pray it’s still there.”
“I’d offer to run ahead,” he said, “but I’m not about to leave you alone here at this hour of t
he morning.”
“Thanks. Let’s pray as we walk.” Her frown was deep. “But let’s hurry.”
~~*~~
Mitch stole a few glances at Cassie as she drove them back to the house. Maybe he should have insisted on driving. She was awfully quiet, and that worried him. Tiny lines had surfaced around her mouth and eyes. His cool, ethereal friend had turned into a tight, twisted bundle of knots. And he was to blame. The one saving grace was that her Saab hadn’t been towed from the restaurant.
He didn’t feel sorry they’d fallen asleep together in the park, but he did regret that he’d subjected her to a potentially dangerous situation. More than that, he hated that she felt remorseful for what happened. Cassie seemed inordinately bothered by what Sam and the others would think of her, as if they’d assume the worst. Granted, he didn’t know them as well as she did, but he felt sure they’d understand. If he worried about what others thought of him, he’d have hung up his saddle a long time ago.
A few large raindrops splattered on the window. “Great,” she said, slapping one hand on the steering wheel. “Now it rains. If it’d done that last night, we wouldn’t be in this predicament.”
“Don’t go blaming God.” Mitch shook his head. As soon as the words were out of his mouth, he knew they were misguided.
“I’m not! And stop patronizing me.” Taking a deep breath, she visibly appeared to calm down and then repeated, “I am not blaming God, Mitch. Yes, He allows things to happen.”
“Right. I think we need to try and figure out why He allowed it to happen and talk about where we go from here.”
“Where we go from here?” She glared at him for a couple of seconds before returning her attention to the road. He hated to incense her even more, but she was beyond gorgeous with fire spitting from those sapphire eyes. Full of passion. If she wasn’t already so agitated, he’d kiss her. Unfortunately, kissing him was the last thing she’d want to do given their current situation.