Before Phoebe had a chance to reply Sophie had disappeared out of the changing room to get the seamstress. With a few moments of privacy she walked over to her handbag hanging on the hook and pulled her phone out. She had messages from John and Marco. She closed her eyes and leaned against the wall. Who knew text messages and missed calls could cause so much turmoil. Taking a deep breath she entered her passcode and went to her voicemail.
“Hey, sweetheart, it’s just me. Wanted to say hope the dress fitting is going well. I’m sure you are going to look beautiful and I can’t wait to see you in your wedding gown. See you tonight. Bye.”
Hearing Marco’s voice caused a calmness to settle over her. Oh, how she wished he’d finished the message off with I love you. It would push all her doubts aside. It would give her the reassurance that she finally came first in someone’s life. She hadn’t been first with John; his need for adventure in war-torn countries had come first. Sure, he was going as a doctor and would be making a difference to the lives of people less fortunate. But still, it hurt that he hadn’t even given her a second thought when he’d made the decision to join the international medical organization. The same had gone for her parents — like John, the more adventurous the pursuit, the more important it was to them than their own daughter. Even Mrs. White, the one person who had professed to love and care for Phoebe, had ultimately let her down. What made her so sure what she had to offer Marco would be enough for him? She pressed the number to save Marco’s message.
The next message increased her anxiety again.
“It’s John. Come on, Phoebs, pick up your phone. You know you want to see me. Remember all the fun we had? I haven’t forgotten. I made a mistake leaving you. I’m in love with you.”
The two messages couldn’t be any more different. The tones of voice from the two men were completely different too. She quickly deleted John’s voicemail and then his text messages without looking at them. As if by doing that, it would make her problem go away. Of course, all it did was make her wonder what he had texted her the moment she’d deleted them.
“Ms. Fitzgerald, is it okay to come in?” The seamstress’s voice had Phoebe quickly putting the phone away, as if it had given her an electric shock.
“Yes, please come in.”
Within minutes Phoebe was out of the dress and back in her street clothes. The oppressive feeling had abated the moment her dress had been lifted over her head. She gave it one last look, touching the fabric softly. Would she wear it or would she call everything off on the off-chance that John was the man she was meant to be with? Could she even trust what John said to her now? Or was he just looking for a good time before his next adventure called to him?
Too many thoughts were running around her head. Until she truly sat down and thought things through, nothing would make sense.
Phoebe walked out the room and headed towards the main area, where Sophie was waiting. As she got closer to Sophie she noticed a lovely flower arrangement sitting on the alterations department’s reception desk. She didn’t think the bouquet had been there when she’d arrived.
She reached Sophie’s side. “You ready to go, Soph?”
“Sure am, but … ” She pointed to the flowers. “Delivery arrived for you while I was waiting.”
Phoebe looked at the flowers, shocked. “Who are they from?”
Sophie laughed and Phoebe realized how stupid that sounded. “I would imagine Marco sent them to you.”
Phoebe reached out towards the small envelope poking out of the arrangement, her fingers lightly trembling. She extracted the card and scanned the note, almost dropping it.
You’re making a mistake marrying this guy. It’s me you should be marrying. Meet me tonight. 8 P.M. La Circe. John.
Phoebe closed her eyes. How the hell had John known she’d be at this particular bridal salon? Her skin crawled at the thought that John might have followed her. It didn’t seem to be his personality, but how else would he know where and when she would be having her dress fitting?
She wished she had the ability to turn back time, to go back those two weeks to when she was sure that marrying Marco was the right thing to do.
“Is everything alright?” Sophie said, pulling her away from her thoughts.
She looked at her friend and sent her a smile. A smile that she knew wouldn’t fool Sophie at all. “Yes, why wouldn’t I be okay? I got a lovely flower arrangement from my doting f-fiancé.” Phoebe choked out the word as she tucked the card into her pocket. “Let’s go.”
She made a move to leave but then remembered the flowers. She turned to the lady who had been helping her with her dress. “Here, you take the flowers, I’m sure my fiancé won’t mind you having them. A thank you for all that you’ve done.”
With that she headed towards the exit, not sure that she’d be back to pick up her dress.
• • •
“You want to tell me what’s going on?” Sophie asked as she placed a tray holding two glasses of white wine and a plate of chips and dips on the table in front of her. “And don’t try to fob me off. I left you to your thoughts in the car. Now it’s time to come clean. Why are you having second thoughts about marrying Marco?”
Phoebe took a sip of wine, hoping that it would give her the courage she needed. The wine had a sharp, fruity taste to it. She took a deep breath and blurted out the name that had been haunting her for the past two weeks. “John’s back.”
Sophie looked at her incredulously, as if she couldn’t quite believe what Phoebe had said. She couldn’t blame her.
“John as in the douchebag who left you the moment his residency was done to chase greener pastures and, no doubt, more ladies? That’s the John you’re talking about?”
“Yes, him.”
“And he’s the reason you’re having second thoughts?”
Phoebe could hear the annoyance in Sophie’s voice. She could understand it, and, as she sat there, she could almost reason with herself that her thoughts were stupid. But a part of her was still wondering “what if.” What if John’s coming back was a sign that he was the one she was meant to be with?
“Phoebe, why are you even entertaining thoughts of John? I thought you loved Marco? I mean, you’re a few weeks away from getting married!”
“I know. I’m so confused. I don’t know what to do.”
“It’s actually quite simple, Phoebs. Do you love Marco? If so, then tell John to get lost. If you have real doubts then you need to think. You should go away somewhere by yourself to think things through.” Sophie paused — Phoebe could see the censure in her friend’s eyes and knew that what Sophie was going to say next wasn’t going to be pleasant. “But don’t hurt Marco, he doesn’t deserve it.”
She was right, of course, but Phoebe was also surprised. Shouldn’t Sophie be on her side? Sophie was her best friend, not Marco’s. Was she, again, about to be let down by someone who she thought would always have her back?
“Whatever I do, someone gets hurt,” Phoebe said quietly.
“Then you need to think long and hard before you do anything stupid like cancelling your wedding. You’re my best friend and I love you, but I won’t sit here and agree that you should go off with John. I remember how he hurt you when he left. He didn’t even consider your feelings. Marco healed you, Phoebs. You’ve been so happy since the two of you hooked up at Louisa’s christening. You seem to be so much more at peace with yourself.”
At peace sounded boring to Phoebe’s ears, further increasing her anxiety. When she had been with John it had always been fun. They had always been joking around, never really taking anything seriously. Unfortunately, her heart hadn’t remembered to keep it light and had fallen for him.
“I thought I had it all sorted. I thought I was happy,” she murmured, almost to herself.
“You are happy, Phoebe.”
; “How can you say that? I had more fun with John than I do with Marco. We were always laughing.”
“But that was superficial. Even Alex has commented on how much happier you seem with Marco than you did with John.”
“That’s because Alex didn’t like John, and I’m seeing his best friend now.”
“Not true. Alex didn’t mind him. He thought John was a good doctor. He just never thought John was your match and Alex didn’t like it when you got hurt by John. Alex cares about you too. He knows how important you are to me.”
The conversation wasn’t going in the direction Phoebe wanted it to. And she was still confused.
Sophie shrugged her shoulders, as if knowing Phoebe didn’t want to continue the conversation. “Well whatever decision you make, you have to remember this: you will see Marco on a regular basis. You’re both Louisa’s godparents. I won’t have one of you without the other at any of her birthdays or other celebrations.”
• • •
“Is everything alright, sweetheart? You’ve been quiet all evening.”
How to answer that question, Phoebe thought as she placed her coffee cup back on the saucer. Ever since she’d left Sophie’s place she’d been thinking over her suggestion of taking some time away, and trying to get her head around the dilemma she found herself in. It hadn’t helped that John had called three more times. He was acting like a stalker. But a part of her still wanted to see him. Talk to him. If she told Sophie that, Sophie would say it was the rash part of her speaking.
As if struck by a cannon ball, she knew what she had to do.
“I can’t marry you.”
The words fired out of her and she immediately wanted to snatch them back. A slight flaring of Marco’s nostrils was the only indication that her words had shocked him. She’d expected to see fire in the depths of his brown eyes. However, his handsome face remained blank, as normal as ever — right down to his lush, full bottom lip, and his nose with the slight bump from when it was broken playing schoolyard football. No one watching him in this restaurant would have any idea that she’d just dropped a major, life-changing, bombshell on him.
He looked around the crowded restaurant before returning his gaze back to her. “I’ll ask for the check.”
Phoebe nodded, unable to speak. She sat quietly while Marco signaled the waiter.
“I’m sorry,” she whispered as the waiter walked away. He held up his hand to stop her from saying anything else.
Why had she blurted that out in the middle of a restaurant? Did she hope that by saying it in a crowded place he wouldn’t make a scene? Did she hope that there was safety in numbers and she could tell him everything and he’d just sit there and take it all in, smiling like nothing was happening? She should’ve waited until they were at her place. Or at least in the car on the way home.
The waiter returned with the check and Marco opened his wallet and pulled out some bills, placing them in the folder. He closed it with a snap, pushed his chair back, and stood up. “Let’s go.”
Phoebe shivered; she’d never seen him like this. So cold and remote. He’d always been open with her. The first time they’d met had been at Alex and Sophie’s wedding. She’d been so caught up in John that she hadn’t paid much attention to him, and had put the connection flaring between them down to the fact that they were best man and maid of honor. The next time they’d seen each other had been at Louisa’s christening. John had been gone for months and well, the connection flared to life again and she had gone home with him.
“Are you coming, Phoebe?” Marco’s tone was impatient and pulled her from the thoughts of their first night together.
“Yes.” She stood and walked towards the restaurant’s exit.
Even in anger, he was the consummate gentleman, holding the door open for her so she could exit the restaurant before him. The short walk to the car passed in a tense silence.
What was she doing? Had she done the right thing telling Marco she couldn’t marry him? They reached the car and once again he held the door open for her. She paused before getting into the car. She looked up at him. In the muted light of the car park he looked to be made of stone. She ached to reach out and touch his cheek, to soften the tension that she could see in his jaw. But at that moment, that would be the worst thing she could do. So she murmured her thanks and slipped into the car. He closed the door firmly. She’d expected him to slam it.
• • •
Marco got into the car, keeping a tight hold on his anger. An anger that had started from the moment Phoebe announced she was calling the wedding off. It was the last thing he’d expected to come out of her mouth. He could tell she wasn’t herself that evening; she’d turned her head when he’d leaned in to kiss her, and she’d been distracted throughout dinner. He had put it down to being preoccupied with their wedding plans. But her pre-occupation had been about cancelling the wedding, not thinking about what still needed to be finalized.
He pulled out of the car park and headed towards … not his house that was for sure. He wanted to have this conversation where he wouldn’t be reminded of the outcome.
He drove for a few minutes before coming across a small park. He pulled into the empty lot.
“What are we doing here?” Phoebe asked.
Marco cut the engine and released his seat belt. He turned to face her. “We’re going to talk.”
“At a deserted park?” He could hear the incredulous tone in her voice.
“Yes.”
“Why not at your house or mine?”
“Because I think we need to discuss this situation we now find ourselves in in a neutral place.”
He didn’t want to have a talk at all. What he really wanted to do was reach over and kiss her. Kiss away her doubts and remind her that they were good together and their marriage would be a good and lasting one. But he knew if he made any move like that it would probably only reinforce her decision to end things. And that was the last thing he wanted to happen. He didn’t want to end things with Phoebe. He’d wanted her since he’d first laid eyes on her at Alex and Sophie’s wedding. He’d bided his time until she was single and then he’d made his move. She was sexy and attractive and he’d felt a connection with her that he hadn’t felt with anyone. Not even Veronika, the other woman he’d considered marrying until she’d betrayed him and he’d learned that loving deeply only led to being hurt. But though he knew he would never let himself make that mistake again — falling in love makes you blind and stupid — he could not deny that his relationship with Phoebe was damn near close to ideal. She made him happy, and he knew he wanted her to always be around. Marriage was the way to ensure that.
“Well are we getting out or are we going to sit here all night and gaze into the darkness?”
He gave a quiet chuckle; he really enjoyed seeing the little glimpses of Phoebe’s sense of humor she shared with him every now and then. He wished she’d do it more often. Sometimes he wondered if she was keeping part of herself away from him.
He got out of the car, walked around to her side, and opened her door before she had the chance to. He held out a hand, ignoring the warmth spreading over him, like it always did when he touched her. There was no way he was going to let her call off the wedding. There was no way he was going to let her leave his life. There was no way their relationship was done.
He didn’t release her hand as they ambled towards the park bench. In any other circumstance, it would be quite a romantic scenario. A moonlight walk in the park, the trees casting shadows, perfect for stealing an illicit kiss or two.
He gave the bench a quick wipe with his free hand, brushing away the leaves that had fallen during the day. He felt a shiver ripple through Phoebe, so he shrugged out of his jacket, hating that he had to release her hand.
“Are you cold?” he asked as he held it out towards her.
“No I’m fine, but thank you.”
He waited until she sat before slipping the jacket back on and joining her on the bench. For the first time in his life he found he didn’t know how to start a conversation with someone.
“I’m not changing my mind, no matter what you say.”
Well that was one way to start it, straight for the jugular. He felt he knew Phoebe really well. He was sure he would’ve noticed if she was having doubts. Prior to the last two weeks, they had spent every possible moment together.
Two weeks ago, the day he’d been unable to meet her for lunch. The thought hit him again. Two weeks ago something happened in her life that she hadn’t shared with him. The anger that had cooled on the drive to the park flared to life again. He didn’t like it when things were kept from him. After all the secrets kept and lies told by Veronika, he valued honesty.
“What happened two weeks ago?” he asked.
Her gasp was all he needed to know that he’d hit the jackpot with his comment. The big question would be whether she would tell him the truth or evade it.
“Nothing. Nothing happened.” Her voice was high pitched — another sign she was nervous and lying to him.
“Don’t lie to me, Phoebe.”
Even with anger flowing through his veins, his hands itched to cover hers as they fiddled with the strap of her purse, twisting it tightly. He decided to tone his questions down. He wouldn’t get to the bottom of the situation if he badgered her. “Tell me why you don’t want us to get married anymore.”
She stood and started pacing in front of him, creating a slight breeze as she passed him. Her blonde hair was caught up in a loose knot at the back of her head, tendrils escaping and caressing her fine cheekbones. In the dim light she looked ethereal. He couldn’t see her blue eyes, but he imagined they’d be stormy — not clear blue like they were in the throes of passion. The faint fragrance of her perfume wafted towards him. The scent reminded him of the times he’d buried his head in her neck, feasting on the soft skin below her ear, her soft moans of pleasure filling his ears. He clenched his fist against the bolt of desire that coursed through his body, replacing the anger that had been there moments before.
Lovers Unmasked: The Complete Series Page 37