“I don’t think so,” Marco replied as he kissed the top of her head. “The locals might know about it, but I’m sure the walk down to the beach is enough to put anyone off.”
He tugged at her hand and pulled her towards the blanket he’d laid down while she was getting back into her swimsuit.
“Let’s eat and then we can take another swim.”
“And talk?” she asked. After all, that was what today was supposed to have been about.
He seemed to stiffen up momentarily, as if he the idea of talking was worse than getting teeth pulled. She wondered why he was being so secretive. What was it that he didn’t want to share with her?
She pulled away, hurt to think that he still didn’t trust her enough to unburden his past on her. What had happened to him?
“Or not talk, if that’s what you want. But then you may as well leave. Wasn’t the whole staying-at-the-house-with-me thing a chance for us to get to know each other better?”
She sat down on the blanket and started to fill her plate with the chicken and salad fixings that Marco had laid out, trying not to let him know how much he’d hurt her.
He sat down next to her, his heat reaching out to her, as if to provide the comfort he couldn’t give with words.
Everything in her wanted to get up and walk away. What did she have to do to become important to someone so they would share their past and future wants and needs with her?
Marco sat and ate in silence, and the more he put the food in his mouth, the more the anger built up inside of her. She had to get out of there before she did something stupid like throw her remaining food at him to try and get some sort of response from him. It was like she’d dreamed they’d made love for all the attention he was giving her now.
Phoebe set her plate down, wishing she could slam it down and make some noise. Anything to break the uncomfortable silence that had taken up residence under their shelter.
“I’m going for a walk,” she blurted out and tried her best to stomp out, which was hard to achieve when walking on soft sand.
She all but ran down to the shore, fighting the tears that threatened to overwhelm her. She felt cheap, giving her body to him so freely only to have him all but reject her when she mentioned talking.
Why hadn’t she’d learned from their previous relationship? She’d once again let her sexual attraction to Marco overpower her sensibilities and her reasoning for breaking off their engagement.
She reached the water’s edge and stood on the firm sand, enjoying the feel of the cool water as the waves washed over her, tamping out the heat of her anger.
She willed the tears away that were welling behind her eyes. A warm hand on her arm startled her and she let out a muffled scream.
“I’m sorry.” Before she had time to comprehend what was happening she was whipped around and wrapped up in strong arms. She tried to pull away but he only tightened his hold on her.
“Sorry isn’t going to cut it anymore, Marco. You asked me to start over. To get to know each other and within a couple of hours … ” She trailed off and waved towards the shelter. “That happens.”
“I didn’t plan for that to happen.” He ground the words out.
“So tell me, what was on your mind for today?”
“A picnic on the beach.” He held up his hands in mock surrender. “I swear that’s all I had in mind.”
“Nothing else?”
Phoebe didn’t need to say anything else; she knew Marco knew exactly what she was getting at. But he just stood there, looking out at the ocean as if the answer would miraculously appear in front of him.
“You seem to be avoiding the question again. It’s getting a bit tiring, you know.”
He let out a frustrated sigh. “Yes, I had thought we could talk, but … ”
“But you decided to seduce me instead in the hopes that I wouldn’t push the issue.”
“No. How many times do I have to tell you that that wasn’t my plan? I was enjoying being with you. Having you nearby. I’ve missed you, and I didn’t want to spoil things by bringing up my past or your past.”
“I don’t get you, Marco. I don’t get any of this. How are we supposed to move on if you don’t share anything with me? If we don’t communicate with each other.”
Phoebe felt like she was a cracked record. How many times today had she said the same words over and over and over, and still it didn’t penetrate the thick cage he’d built around himself.
“You know what? This conversation is going nowhere — again. I’m going for a swim.” She stated as she tore off her over shirt, balled it up and threw it away from the reach of the incoming waves.
With that she turned and strode into the water, ignoring the coolness of the water on her skin. Without looking back to see what Marco was doing she dove in.
The water washed over her and she swam under the waves for a few breaths. When her lungs were bursting she shot up to the surface, treading water as she flicked the hair out of her eyes.
Marco was right next to her. “I was beginning to think I might have to rescue you.”
“I don’t need rescuing, I’m a big girl.” She ducked back under the water and with a swift kick she moved away from Marco.
When her muscles felt sufficiently tired, she headed back to the shore. Once she got back to the shelter she picked up her towel and wrapped it around her.
“Feel better?”
The question grated and her relaxed state immediately went out the window.
“I did until you asked that question.” She started to collect up her stuff. “I think we should head back.”
“Okay.” His agreement surprised her and they quietly packed up their picnic site. Phoebe couldn’t believe that only a couple of hours ago they had been so close, as close as any couple could be. It had felt wonderful to be held in his arms, but now it seemed liked she’d dreamt the whole episode.
They made their way back to the car. They hadn’t spoken a word to each other since he’d agreed to her request to leave.
Phoebe put a final bag into the trunk of the car and failed to stop her sigh from escaping.
“Are you okay?”
She rolled her eyes at his question. “Of course I’m okay. I came away to sort my life out, only to have you turn up and complicate things. Then you say you want to start over, but really, I think you lied.”
“Don’t call me a liar.” Marco ground the words out, his anger reaching out to her. There was a part of her that wanted to infuriate him more. Get some more emotion out of him. The only time he showed any emotion was when they had been making love, and even then it was controlled. She would love to get him to lose his grip on his control.
“Well prove that you’re not a liar. All I’ve seen so far in the last few hours is you lying to yourself about what you really want from our relationship.”
“I won’t stand here and be insulted by you, Phoebe.”
“Why not? You’ve practically insulted me all day.” Phoebe knew she was exaggerating but she couldn’t help it. She could see her comments were starting to get to him.
“I have not insulted you at all today — why on earth would you say that?”
She knew she had backed herself into a corner. Now to try and get herself out of it.
“You haven’t gone out of your way to do anything that you said you would. Like talk to me, share things with me. You know, the whole purpose of this starting over agreement between us. That’s the insult, Marco. That you still think you can ignore how I feel.”
Phoebe glanced up to see Marco watching her intently. What she wasn’t saying was that it wasn’t just about learning his secrets — it was about needing him to trust and love her enough that he would want to tell her his secrets. She needed to know that he wanted and loved her for the pers
on she was, not the person he perceived her to be. Until she knew she had that, then they may as well stop this reconciliation attempt.
CHAPTER 7
Marco flexed his fingers around the steering wheel as he concentrated on the road in front of him. What he really wanted to do was pull over and sample Phoebe’s lips again. Ever since they’d made love on the beach he’d wanted to lose himself in her again. Anything to prevent her from asking questions.
He was being a hypocrite and he knew it. He wanted to know all about her, but he wasn’t quite prepared to share his past history with Veronika with Phoebe just yet. That was a part of his life he’d rather forget ever happened. He’d given his heart and soul to a woman who had never truly loved him, had never been her real self with him. How could he trust what any woman said to him after what Veronika had done?
He shouldn’t let his past color his future. He knew Phoebe wasn’t anything like Veronika. But part of him still held back. If he gave himself fully to her, part of him would be waiting for something to happen. Something that would be worse than what Veronika had done. He didn’t think he’d recover if Phoebe hurt him that deeply.
His emotional mind told him it was unfair to hold back like this, but the last time he’d trusted that part of himself, the trust had been shattered. His rational mind told him to always hold back — no matter what the consequences may be.
“Marco, pull over.” Phoebe’s urgent call broke through his thoughts.
In a split second he checked his review mirror to see if anyone was behind them and then slammed the brakes. The car skidded a little, but he managed to control it and safely pull over to the side.
“What’s wrong? Are you not well?” His immediate concern was Phoebe — looking at her, she didn’t appear to be unwell, just perhaps a little distressed.
“We need to turn around. I thought I saw something on the side of the road. Just back up a little.”
Marco didn’t know whether to feel angry or relieved that nothing was wrong with her. “You screeched at me to pull over because you thought you saw something?”
“I did not screech,” she said indignantly before admitting sheepishly. “I may have spoken loudly though.”
“Uh huh.” He nodded. “So what did you see?”
Please let it not be some injured animal, he thought. He couldn’t deal with seeing an animal hurt and then have to put it out of its misery.
“I think I saw a car,” she said quietly. “I noticed some skid marks on the road and then when we drove past where they finished, it looked like some bushes had been mowed down.”
Sickness permeated Marco’s stomach and he took a couple of deep breaths. Memories of another time; another accident. Memories he’d thought he’d conquered so long ago. Memories that had changed his life and the life of his best friend, Alex.
“Perhaps it was from a couple of days ago.”
“No, I’m sure I saw a car.” She reached out and touched his arm, her warmth a welcome relief from the cold that was beginning its invasion of him. “Please, Marco, I don’t know why, but I have this feeling that something bad has happened.”
He hoped her feeling was wrong. They were basically in the middle of nowhere. The nearest towns were about an hour away in one direction and two hours in the opposite direction. Help could be a long time coming. He knew all about what happened when help didn’t get to an accident site quickly enough.
The memory of Tomasso’s accident threatened to overwhelm him. Tomasso — another person he’d loved who’d been taken from him. Not by pretending to be someone he wasn’t, but by the fates. Tomasso and Alex had been like the brothers Marco had never had. Yes, he still had Alex, but Alex had his own family now. What did Marco have? Nothing but a past relationship which he thought would be everlasting and that turned out to be based on lies, and another relationship that, if he didn’t give himself fully, would crumble as well.
He couldn’t think about those things now, not when he had Phoebe looking expectantly at him, wanting him to be strong and listen to her, not belittle her feeling that something bad had happened.
He had to do this for her.
“Okay, let’s take a look.”
He turned the vehicle and started down the road at a slow pace. “You’ll need to tell me exactly where you think this car is.”
“You’ll see the skid marks, it won’t be too difficult.”
No sooner had she finished speaking when he saw the markings she was talking about. He couldn’t understand why someone would break that hard on this stretch of road. It was straight and there was nothing on the road to indicate that the driver had blown out a tire. It was possible a kangaroo or some other animal had veered across the road in the car’s way. It seemed unlikely, though, as it was still a little too light for animals — particularly kangaroos — to be out; they tended to become active at dusk.
“There.” Phoebe’s voice again pulled him out of his thoughts. He pulled over just up from where she was pointing.
He put a hand on her arm, restraining her from leaping out of the car. “Are you sure you want to do this?” he asked. “It could be pretty unpleasant.”
“Marco, I’m an emergency nurse. I see unpleasant things all the time.”
“Of course. I didn’t think.”
He’d tried to inject a little bit of humor into his voice, but he knew he failed when he saw her eyes narrow in his direction.
“Are you okay? You look a little bit sick. Don’t tell me you’re the kind of guy who faints or throws up at the sight of blood?”
He told himself to pull it together and gave his head a mental shake. He needed to be strong no matter what. He needed to be present to help.
He could do this.
It wasn’t one of his friends in the car. It wasn’t that afternoon when Tomasso had died. It was a stranger or — he held out hope — that the car was abandoned.
“No, I’m fine,” he said grimly as he released his seatbelt and opened the door. “Let’s go.”
They met at the front of the car and Marco took hold of Phoebe’s hand. He needed to feel connected to a warm, living person.
Together they made their way through the bush. After walking a few feet his heart dropped at the sight in front of him. The car was resting on its side, the front end bent out of shape.
“Oh my goodness,” Phoebe breathed beside him. “This is going to be difficult.”
“It’s possible that the accident happened a couple of days ago and they just haven’t come back for the car.”
Marco knew he was clutching at straws. There was no way this was an old accident site. If it had been, the car would’ve been put back on its wheels to help the victims out.
“You really don’t want to be here, do you?”
“I can think of better places I’d rather be. However, we’re here, so let’s see what we can do.”
“Thank you.”
Marco looked at Phoebe; her appreciation and what looked like understanding shone in her eyes. “I’d do anything for you.”
He felt the slight squeezing of her hand in his. “Hello, is anyone there?” he called out.
His words echoed around the bush, but no response came from the vehicle. The sickness that he’d felt in the car returned full force. It didn’t look good.
“Darn, I wish I had a first aid kit,” Phoebe muttered as she released his hand and strode confidently towards the car.
For the first time since they’d started seeing each other, Marco was seeing Phoebe the nurse in action.
“I’ve got one in the car,” he responded.
That stopped her in her tracks. “What, a first aid kit?”
“Yes, I always carry one with me.” He had ever since Tomasso’s accident. Only he’d never had to use it before. Had hoped he would never have to
use it.
“Thank goodness for that. Although I’m not sure how much help it will be if they’re seriously injured but anything is better than nothing.”
He stood a few feet from her, watching as she walked around the car. He couldn’t tell what she was seeing. Her face gave nothing away. A protective part of him wanted to pull her away, except he wouldn’t. She was a trained professional, and she knew what to do and how to react in situations like this.
While he waited for her to come back, he reached into his back pocket and pulled out his cell phone. He only had one bar of signal. He knew that would not be enough to try and get help.
“I’ll need that kit now.”
Phoebe spoke behind him and he whirled around. He could see the strain in her eyes and knew the news wasn’t going to be good.
“How bad is it?” he asked as he reached out and touched her arm, pushing down the desire to pull her into his arms and get the hell away from the scene. He didn’t want to walk up to the car. He knew all he’d see would be Tomasso’s face. The way it had been screwed up in pain before the inevitability of death took the pain away and a strange peacefulness had replaced it. He’d dreamt about those looks for months. He’d never told Alex about those dreams. He’d never told anyone.
“The driver didn’t make it and the passenger is unconscious but it’s difficult to see exactly how badly injured she is. We’ll need to try and see if we can get the car back on its wheels so I can get a good look.”
He pushed down the feelings of panic that started to fill him. “How are we going to do that? Wouldn’t it be better to wait until the authorities come and stabilize the car? What if we do more damage to her?”
“We don’t have time to wait. If we wait it might be too late. We have to do something — help is going to take at least an hour to get here.”
He knew all about how deadly waiting could be.
“Okay, let’s get the kit and then see what we can do about the car.” He wouldn’t let Phoebe see his fears. He would be the strength that she needed and they would get through this together.
Lovers Unmasked: The Complete Series Page 44