Wearily, she rose from the tub and began drying herself with the sheet Tegan had left nearby. The beige packet taunted her as she performed this task and she found herself propelled closer for a better look. The envelope was unaddressed. Carefully, she allowed her slim fingers to pick it up. As she gingerly turned it over in her hand, she saw on the broken wax seal the impression of a simple, bold “C.”
In spite of her reluctance, Sarah’s immense curiosity overcame her and with a sigh, she put down the letter so that she could don a wrapper to cover herself and ward off the chill. Tying the cord around her slim waist, she sat down at her dressing table, and, with shaking hands, removed the note from its envelope. Momentarily squeezing her eyes shut, she unfolded the paper, mentally preparing to read. When she finally looked, she was immediately struck by the neat yet dramatic scrawl before her. So much like him, she thought: bold and elegant.
With a growing mixture of anticipation and dread, she read: I have not deceived you, Sarah, despite what you may think. But I do not expect you to believe me without an explanation, which I will deliver only in person. Until I see you again, I implore you to postpone judgment and hold dear the thought: circumstances are not always as they appear.
I look forward to our next meeting with great anticipation.
Regards,
S. P.S. Your father will enlighten you as to the news I had hoped to give you myself. In spite of the cost, I am pleased that you chose to meet me.
Sarah threw down the letter with an oath. “He tells me nothing! And expects me to harbor warm thoughts until I see him again! Only a true rake would believe such a fairy tale!” But even as she gave words to her bitterness, Sarah’s thoughts were racing to discover the truth behind his claim of virtue. Circumstances are not always as they appear. But how else was she to interpret the impassioned scene she witnessed in the garden? Stewart and Juliana’s embrace was anything but casual. And even Juliana would admit it wasn’t the first time they had been so entwined, for she had told Sarah about kissing Stewart in the garden on her birthday.
And the nerve of him throwing back in her face her stupid decision to meet him! “What a little fool he must think I am,” she fumed. But how did he know it was she? He must have been sure or he would not have risked writing such an incriminating letter. “Probably some omniscient power given to demons,” she remarked, and abruptly rose.
And with that, her answer was dropped at her feet – a small bit of frayed blue silk trim had fallen unnoticed from the letter into her lap. From her gown, no doubt when she had fled the garden.
“Ooh!” Sarah squealed in absolute frustration over his continuing luck and her seemingly endless misfortune.
CHAPTER 11
It was midday before Sarah departed the sheltering haven of her room and then only because she was summoned by her father.
As she entered the library, dressed in a demure flowered gown trimmed in white at the neck and sleeves, her foreboding was masked beneath a pleasant smile and the bright azure gaze she bestowed upon the Duke, who rose from his massive leather chair by the fire.
“Come,come,mydarling,”hebeckoned cheerily, holding out long arms to great her. “You’ve played the family ghost long enough so I am forced to make an appointment to see you.” Father and daughter shared an affectionate buss, and as he released her to return to the chair, he added, “What has become of my constant shadow? The young lady I trip over every time I turn around?”
“Oh Father,” Sarah returned warmly, “you have been so busy of late; none of us has enjoyed your company as much as we would like. Is that what was on your mind?” Sarah gathered her skirts and lowered herself onto the settee, her expression teasingly innocent.
“Only in part,” he chuckled. “In truth, I am fairly bursting with good news for you and I cannot wait another second.”
“Gracious me!” Sarah reacted, raising a hand to the tall white ruffles at her neck in a gesture of mock surprise, “Tell me now. What is it that excites you so?”
The Duke leaned forward eagerly. “You, my bluestocking, are going to America!”
“Did I hear you correctly?” she gasped. “I am sending you on a visit to the United States of America.” Her father, Sarah could see, was practically beside himself with joy.
“But how did this come about? I’ve never been further than Town in my entire life. What is the reason for such a journey?”
“I wish you to handle the purchase of some property for me there. You know I trust your judgment in land matters, and I am quite sure you will recognize a fair deal.”
“But really, Father,” Sarah argued. “There are many others much more qualified than I to handle such a task. What about your representatives?”
“They have their place. But if I wish to send my daughter to the Colonies, what is to keep me from doing so? Besides, your powers of observation are keen. I would have no better correspondent than yourself to tell me about this land that I shall never see with my own eyes.”
“Oh,Papa,”Sarahwhisperedherchildhood name for her sire, her eyes tearful and brimming with love, “I-I don’t know what to say. It is dreams come true, surely. But to leave you ... and Mama ... and my home? I’ve never been ....”
Weston quickly interrupted. “I’ve no doubt you will suffer some homesickness, child. But it is time you begin living a life of your own, and not cloistered here in the Oxfordshire countryside. You need to meet new people. Society may not approve of a daughter of the ton traveling so freely, but” he added with a mirthless chuckle, “I never gave a care for the ton. And you, my darling, are no gabster. I can think of no one I would trust more, or be more honored to send on this voyage.”
But Sarah saw something more in his rationale, something she felt compelled to name. She gave him a steady look, thinking back on the day when Stewart Chamberlain had given words to her father’s concerns. “I appreciate your modern ideas, but I think you are worried that unless I leave this house, no husband will be found for me. Are you concerned, Father?”
The Duke’s eyes did not blink. “Are you not concerned?”
Sarah’seyeswidenedalarminglyandshe choked on a sudden intake of air. “Father!”
“Well?” “No!” Sarah’s expression was defiant, but her father’s eyes did not waver. It was she who finally broke the stare, as she slumped her shoulders and sighed. “You have always been honest to a fault, haven’t you? I beg you not to trouble yourself overmuch, for I shall marry ... eventually.”
“That is true,” Weston replied sternly, ignoring her defensive tone, “but you’ve taken no interest in the local crop and you have not helped yourself in London by spending more time in libraries than the salons. So pray tell, where are we expected to find this husband for you?”
Sarahflunghergazeaway,roseandwalked toward the fireplace. As she whirled around to address her father, irritation was apparent in her furrowed brows and stony eyes. “What does it matter? It is not as though you are in need of sonsin-law or grandchildren, as Uncle Wesley is your heir,” she said, referring to her father’s much younger brother, who, by the conventions of peerage, would take the place in succession of the son the Duke and Duchess never had.
“If I am destined to marry, I will. But I am not unfulfilled here. I enjoy my life – my family, my books, Serena, helping you, living here. I enjoy my freedom most of all. And yes,” she added, thrusting her hands on her hips, “I will enjoy this voyage to America – but only as your emissary – not as some Friday-faced spinster, desperate to marry. Can this be certain between us, Father?” Sarah implored. “For I refuse to go if you expect otherwise.”
Weston, who had been watching his beautiful daughter critically, rose slowly and joined her in front of the fire. “From the outset,” he began slowly, “our terms have been in agreement. Have no doubt of that. And I remind you that it was you who brought up the subject of marriage. But since you have, I will say one thing and that will be the end of it for all time. Will you listen?”
&nb
sp; Shenodded,knowingshehadnochoice. “You think I want you to marry because that is a gentlewoman’s primary function in life. And that we, your parents, would be spared some humiliation if you were to wed. Well, you are wrong,” he admonished, “absolutely wrong.”
Taking her smaller hands into his great ones, he continued, “I want you to enjoy a full, purposeful life. I simply know that marriage and family should not be underrated in their ability to provide such things. When you choose wisely and make a firm commitment with your spouse to hold to your vows, the world is laid at your feet. Anything can grow from that most sacred bond – an infinite measure of love, courage, compassion, success – and freedom as well.
“Where we di ffer is that I do not put as much trust in chance as you are wont to. We must go after that which we want; make ourselves available to the workings of fate. So,” he concluded, stroking her cheek and tilting her chin to look directly into her misty eyes, “is it permissible for your doting old papa to provide opportunities for you to see what is beyond your own doorstep?”
“Oh, Father,” Sarah cried, throwing her arms around his neck and hugging him fiercely. Mumbling into his collar, she sniffed, “I am not sure whether I agree with your beliefs, but your motives are indeed loving and honorable. And I am touched.”
As they held each other close, Sarah thought of what a wonderful man her father was. They had been close from the time she could remember. Despite the high value placed on sons and heirs, his every word and action told her that he would not have wished her to be anything but what she was. And because he believed an idle mind was the worst sin of all, he had encouraged her natural curiosity, making sure she learned how to read, write and reason as well as a man.
As she grew, he urged her to take an interest in his business affairs. She learned much about the running of the estate, not to mention the duchy, and eventually was able to offer intelligent opinions. Ultimately she gained a place among his most trusted advisors, a position the two of them held discreetly, since the idea would have horrified most of the men Weston dealt with.
This arrangement suited Sarah perfectly and had made her life interesting and full in so many ways. If only the pressure of a suitable marriage weren’t so great, she might be able to enjoy her bounty even more.
But at least she and her father had come to some kind of understanding about that subject, Sarah admitted to herself. And now she could concentrate on the most wonderful opportunity of her life – a journey to America. Immediately, she wanted to learn all the details of her incredible voyage. With one last, brief hug, she stepped away from her father, impatiently wiped the tears that had moistened her cheeks, and said, “You’ve told me almost nothing about my trip. When shall I leave? How long will I stay?”
“Hold!” Weston interrupted, grinning at the sudden onslaught. “One question at a time. Here now, sit down and I’ll tell you the plans.”
Eagerly, Sarah returned to the sofa and unceremoniously plunked herself down, her eyes riveted to her father so as not to miss any of his words.
“You will voyage in a month’s time. And while I do not expect it will take you long to transact the business, I would hope that you will remain in the Colonies until spring. This will give you ample opportunity to explore and learn. Besides, I would not have you sailing during the winter months for it is not only a freezing proposition, but a more dangerous one as well. I trust you agree?”
“Of course, Father.” Sarah’s eyes shone with anticipation. “But you have not yet said where I will be going, or who will accompany me. Pray tell.”
“Your destination is Boston and I’ve arranged for a most trustworthy escort – one who is not only familiar with the country, but one on whom you can rely for counsel and aid while you are about your mission. I speak of none other than Mr. Stewart Chamberlain.”
Had a shot been fired in the library at that precise moment, Sarah’s reaction could not have been more sudden or violent. But even as her mouth dropped open in horror and her face paled, she used inhuman strength to force herself to control her speech.
Knotting her trembling fingers, she replied, “B-but Father! Certainly you are not serious? An unmarried man? I’d be safer traveling alone, surely.” Her nervous chatter sounded shrill to her ears. But the idea was so absolutely appalling! Her own father placing her in the care of the one man in the world she feared and now hated. If only she could explain how vile his conduct had been and how knavishly he was wooing both of the Duke’s daughters. Being accompanied by him would be tantamount to a virgin sacrifice! “Father,” she cried, her tone a combination of outrage and pleading, “it is out of the question. I have reason to believe that Mr. Chamberlain is not a suitable companion.”
To her utter amazement, Weston calmly stroked his chin, and with more than a hint of humor in his voice, replied, “You seem quite disturbed, my dear, just as Mr. Chamberlain himself predicted. Would you mind enlightening me as to the cause of your most obvious dislike of the man? I myself have found him to be of unimpeachable character, and a most charming fellow besides. In addition, he is a seasoned traveler. You would be safe in his care.”
“Safe?!” Sarah flew from the settee, and kneading her slim hands together, marched to the fireplace. With a gesture of helplessness, her blue eyes wide as saucers, she turned to face her father, beseeching, “Safe? Father, I think no woman is safe where he is concerned. With all due respect for your ability to judge character, I would have you know that Mr. Chamberlain is a blackguard. A rogue!”
“I would ask proof of such a charge,” the Duke’s tone was suddenly ominous. Sarah involuntarily crossed her arms over her bosom, hugging herself protectively. “Father, it is unspeakable for me to discuss such a delicate subject. I-I cannot say.”
Weston’s eyes rose mercurially, but his voice was unchanged. “You will say.” Biting her lip, she knew she had no choice. “He-he tried to force his attentions on me.” The charges were leveled and she pinched her eyes shut, waiting for the thunderous reaction of outrage and indignation. But instead, her father cleared his voice and spoke quietly, “And was he successful?’
Sarah’s tenuous grasp on composure snapped as her eyes flew open. “No!” she demanded. “But that’s not the point! Father, don’t you see? He cannot be trusted!” In her anger and humiliation, she began pacing in front of the fire. “He is the least suitable escort you could name!”
Weston slowly sat back in his chair and stretched his stockinged legs before him. Placing his elbows on the comfortably upholstered arms, he touched his fingertips together, seemingly intent on watching his hands flex against each other. “Sarah,” he began placidly, “Mr. Chamberlain has confessed to his attraction for you, and did indeed admit to an indiscreet advance.” His words caused Sarah to stop in her paces. She looked on her father with a horrified expression. Weston, however, seemed not to notice. “But he also mentioned that the two of you have reached an understanding about this and that it has not – and would not – happen again. Was he correct?”
Shaking to the very soles of her slippered feet, Sarah forced out her reply. “Yes, but you must realize,” she implored, “he has you to answer to as long as he is under your roof. There is no telling what might become of me on the high seas – or in America. Father, you are throwing me to the wolves!”
“I have his word that no harm will come to you. And I value his word as I do my own. Surely you would not think of discarding an opportunity to see the United States over a problem already resolved.”
“Well I simply do not like him or trust him, Father, and would find his company taxing. How could I feel secure?” she offered desperately.
“Oh, come now, child,” the Duke of Weston argued impatiently. “It’s not as if the two of you will be inseparable, He will simply be available should you need him. Also, he is making the arrangements for you to stay with his sister and her family in Boston, so you won’t be dwelling under the same roof if that is a concern for you.”
Sarah r
ealized that if she had any intention of seeing America, she would have to accept her father’s terms. But the idea of having to bear Stewart Chamberlain’s company – especially after the horrible discovery she had made last night – was almost more than she could handle. But how could she explain any of this to her father without suggesting she felt something for the Yankee? Of course she could refuse to go, but there would never be another opportunity like this.
The dual-edged blade of this dilemma was a physical pain to Sarah, and feebly she attempted to salve her frustration by demanding, “I should hope you will allow a servant to accompany me?”
Weston rose, laughing out loud with relief as he grasped his daughter’s rigid shoulders. “Do I hear the last request of a man about to walk the gallows?” he teased. Ignoring her pout, he continued, “Of course, my dear. I supposed you would like to take Tegan? A lovely and reliable girl. I will arrange it posthaste. Come now,” he urged, stretching a long arm around her shoulders as he began leading her to the door. “Everything will be grand. You’ll see ....”
“Very well, Father,” she sighed. And then seeing the flash of disappointment on his face, added, “Excuse me, Papa. You are right. ‘Twas a shock you gave me, ‘tis all. I suppose I can be civil to Mr. Chamberlain as long as he is accepting the burden of seeing to my welfare.” If only she could believe her own words! “By the way,” she asked, as she placed her hand on the library doorknob, “Does Juliana know of these plans?
“I think your mother has probably told her by now.” “Do you think she will be disappointed that she’s not going?” Sarah could just imagine Juliana’s ire, especially since Stewart was essential to the journey.
“It is impossible to predict what Juliana’s reaction to anything will be,” he smiled affectionately, “but if I had to guess, I would say no. Somehow I cannot picture her putting up with the inconvenience of a long voyage. As you might have noticed by her comments at dinner last night, she does not have a very high opinion of the Colonies. No, I suspect her only concern will be that you won’t be around to share a confidence ... something I know we shall all miss.”
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