by Lexy Wolfe
"I... see," Nolyn finally said, gesturing for Terrence to continue.
"Dzee was... is... the embodiment of magic in Desantiva. All that was left to the Desanti after the attack was a sliver, a spark just enough to keep them alive. But magic, and most of life itself, was stripped from the land. Master Almek says that Guardians do not always consciously know where they need to be, they simply follow clues, like breadcrumbs."
Absently rubbing the hollow in his throat, Terrence murmured, "When Storm brought Almek to the place she had incapacitated Dzee, the Totani chose me to be her temporary host until Storm took us to the Raging One. Ash... was able to restore her soul to her crystal-encased body." Looking up at Nolyn, he said sadly, "Dzee allowed me to choose whether to complete the bond. I just... I didn't want to see Desantiva abandoned again."
Nolyn whistled appreciatively. "I knew Ash was powerful... I had no idea he was that powerful." He patted Terrence's knee. "Though now I can understand something of your conflict. Being touched by Desantiva and Forenta, when neither nation trusts the other is going to be complicated."
"But why me?" Terrence asked pleadingly, looking at the back of his hand again. "I am... no one important." When Nolyn arched an eyebrow, he amended, "Not like Ash. He's an Avarian."
"The Lirai family is not exactly on top of the social hierarchy, either," Nolyn pointed out. "And the Goddess has named me an Edai Magus. The Se'edai's second over eleven others who have sat longer than I've been alive. It isn't about birthright, Terrence; it's about strength and devotion to Forenta and to Her."
"But my family is about as lowborn as you can get and still have mage talent," Terrence argued. "I did not think I was so... so strong."
"I remember when Ash tapped you to be his apprentice. I would agree back then, your strength was... questionable. But you have stretched yourself in Ash's company. Pushed yourself almost as hard as Ash used to push himself. It is proof that the potential of all able to embrace magic is limited only by their own determination, not the status of their birth."
Nolyn smiled a little. "For years, Ash was an anomaly that forced the narrow-minded to accept that lowborn could have equal potential as highborn. With him being acknowledged as an Avarian, they began to say his achievements were because of his birthright, not his own efforts." He put a hand on Terrence's back. "Now here you are. They will likely try to find the highborn bloodlines to explain you."
"They won't, though," Terrence murmured, looking at his hand again. "They already investigated my heritage when they tried to block Master Ash from taking me as a true apprentice." Reaching up to clasp the crossed swords pendant unconsciously, he looked at Nolyn. "Please don't tell anyone! Not even Master Ash knows about..."
"Tell him when you are ready. There is no rush."
Terrence sighed heavily. "But why me? Master Almek says there is a purpose in all things that happen. What purpose could there possibly be for a-a Githalin Illaini?"
Nolyn considered, looking back out towards the horizon. "I have my suspicions why." He looked to Terrence again. "You are devoted to your master, even though you are essentially equals now, aren't you?"
"Of course!" Terrence replied immediately. "I love Master Ash. He believed in me when no one else did." Looking away, he added, "Even when I didn't believe in myself."
"And you obviously do not have any hatred for the Desanti." Terrence frowned, waiting to see what Nolyn was getting at. "Terrence, you are the one person alive who has any hope of understanding both Desantiva and Forenta without any bias. You are a bridge between two very different people. There is only one reason I can see someone like you will be needed in the future. Hopefully sooner rather than later," he added blandly.
"Hopefully...? Why...?" Terrence's eyes went wide. Nolyn smiled and nodded. "Master Ash and Mistress Storm's..."
"Children. Yes. And unless I'm blind, Skyfire and Lyra's children. If it takes someone directing time energies to effect time shifters as Dusvet Almek said, then she's a latent talent herself, I'm certain of it."
"The goddess told Storm about children at the Ceremony of Choosing..." Terrence stared. "Master Nolyn, how could you know? Only Githalin know how to speak Swordanzen, and I told no one!"
Nolyn waved a dismissive hand. "Having watched how those two behave, it's an educated guess. All you did was confirm what is obvious to me." He put a hand on Terrence's shoulder. "Someone will need to understand both aspects of their children's heritage, because while I have no doubts those four will be fiercely loving and protective parents, neither one has a true understanding of the other's people. Not like you have now. Or like you will in the future. Someone the parents would trust." Nolyn smiled faintly and put a hand on Terrence's shoulder. "Let's just hope that Storm and Ash stop fighting themselves soon. Those two need each other as much as living things need air to survive."
"No kidding," Terrence muttered, smiling sheepishly at Nolyn's chuckle and Petal's giggle.
Chapter 63
Ash closed the door to the desert room, slowly lowering the canvas wall back in place. He turned to watch Storm as she removed her heavy cloak and draped it over a stand with exaggerated care. Though she seemed recovered from Taylin's healing of Almek with the help of Ilsa's Vodani medicines, she was more withdrawn than ever, even for her. A haunted look constantly lurked behind her eyes.
Without a word, Ash approached her, tentatively touching her arm. She startled, turning to look into his eyes for several heartbeats before they each grabbed the other in a fierce embrace. He buried his face in her hair, unable to repress the turmoil of emotions he had kept buried deep. "My Swordanzen. I thought I was going to lose you," he whispered harshly.
Trembling, the warrior woman held him no less tightly than he clung to her. "Forgive me, Ash," she begged, voice catching on a dry sob. "I tried... I tried to make you turn away... so many times since I realized... when I realized you were beginning to care about me."
"Why?" he asked, agonized. Holding her by the shoulders, he looked into her green-gold eyes, azure eyes nearly aglow in the dim light as he stared at her. "Why do you keep pushing me away? I do not understand why, Storm! I have told you repeatedly, I care nothing about what others think of us. I leave the petty narrow-mindedness to the idiots of my people."
Storm looked away, unable to meet his eyes for long. "Because I don't want to hurt you."
With a growl, Ash shook her shoulders a little. "Don't you think it hurts me when you push me away? One moment I think you despise me. Then I start to believe you share my feelings, only to have you rip my heart out and stomp it into the ground! Don't you think that causes me pain?!"
"I know it hurts you when I push you away! But it does not hurt you anywhere near as much as it will hurt you when I die!" Storm fired back, glaring at him. "I do not want you to suffer even more because of me! I could not bear death knowing you had to live through that again."
The fierceness of her words shocked him, his anger faltering in his confusion. "What are you talking about?"
"In Desantiva, I could feel the hurt that lingered over your woman here who had died. Even more when you brought us here to recover. I could see your pain when you got between my suitors and me in First home. I had never seen... anyone who bore the same heartache as I had."
Dropping her head to his chest, her voice was tired, resigned. "As much as I hated you then, I wanted nothing more than to make it stop hurting for you. Because I knew how much losing someone hurts. I lost everyone I ever had in my life when Sumalen killed my tribe. But I was only a child. I learned the hard way when Dzee... when Chase died..." She shook her head sharply. "The longer you let someone share your heart, the more it hurts to lose them." Shoving his hands off her arms, she turned, walking away a few steps. "You were right. It is better to be alone."
He could see her shaking. "Storm," he said, reaching towards her, but not wanting to provoke her into attacking him. "No, Storm, it isn't better to be alone. I was wrong."
"Liar!!" She spun around
to face him, eyes wet with tears. "You're never wrong! You're a mage! An Illaini Magus! You know everything! I'm just... I'm just..." She looked at her shaking hands. "I'm nothing but a flawed human with a hole in my soul, just like all other Desanti."
"Oh, gods, Storm." Ash caught her hands in his; squeezing them as if trying to impart the truth of his words through the turmoil of her emotions that roared like the desert ragewinds beneath his touch. "You are not 'just' anything. You are strong and wise and beautiful... and I love you. I love you!" He held her hands tightly when she tried to pull away. "I love you more than I have words to tell you."
"No!" she whispered, tormented. "Please, no... you can't!"
"Storm," Ash said intently. "I can't not love you. Yes, I cared about Dessa, but I never loved her. I couldn't allow myself to love her because I did not want her to look at me like she looked at other men, like the monsters who had raped her. I couldn't because I felt shame whenever I looked at her because I failed to protect her when she needed me, even if I knew I had done all I could.
"But you, Storm... You don't need anyone to protect you. Most of the time," he added. He allowed her to tug her hands free to flee. She took a few steps towards the door, but stopped. The action heartened him. "The only shame I feel is when I have treated you with ignorance. Even then, I want only to keep you safe when you are hurt."
"Even when I have hurt you," Storm said in a low voice. "You still care about me enough to try to keep me from harm." She stiffened when he stepped up quietly behind her and put his hands on her shoulders, sliding them down her arms.
"My heart," Ash whispered. "I know someday we will lose each other. We are bound by so many duties, to our people, our gods, it will be inevitable." Embracing her from behind, he felt her cover his arms with hers as he rested his cheek against her hair. "But why should we keep trying to deny what we both know is there?" Sighing heavily, he turned his face into her hair. "Storm... when I lose you, I don't want to regret we never shared more. I do not want my only memories of you to be only bitter conflicts and empty loneliness. I just wish you could love me as much as I love you."
Storm turned to cling tightly to him, shaking more like a frightened child than a hardened warrior. "Ash," she whispered. "I do love you. So much I... I am afraid..." She turned her face into his chest as she whispered, "I have never felt so much f-for anyone... Not like this. Not—"
He hushed her gently, holding her close. "There is nothing to fear, my Swordanzen." He kissed her lightly, then more passionately. "My Storm. There is nothing we cannot face together."
Resting her head on his shoulder, Storm held tightly to Ash as she spoke quietly. "When my tribe was murdered, the Totani raised me as one of their own. They trained me to be Swordanzen as they had trained the first of the sacred warriors. I earned my Swordanzen name before my adult name."
When Ash remained silent, letting her speak, Storm continued. "Swordanzen only allow family or those they trust to call them by their adult names. I shared my adult name with no one because... I did not want to allow anyone that close, did not want to risk knowing the pain of loss. Not again. Not like I had before." Still silent, the mage ached for Storm, caressing her cheek in sympathy. "Ash..." She looked up into his eyes, an absolute trust reflected in the depths of her green-gold eyes. "My name is Aelia."
Realizing the gift she gave him, Ash felt as though his heart skipped a beat. Once he recovered from his shock, he held her fiercely tight. Storm's embrace was no less ardent.
Chapter 64
Hours later, Ash slowly began to rouse from the most restful sleep he had ever known. He smiled as he stretched, feeling the tautly muscled body of the Desanti woman pressed against him, remembering vividly the intimacy they had shared. Though their lovemaking had been as vigorous and passionate as he expected, he still marveled how tender and gentle the hardened warrior could be as well. The peace he felt was like nothing he had ever imagined.
Sensing Storm stirring, he hugged her tighter, unwilling to let her go. Without warning, he suddenly saw the room more vividly than he had ever seen anything before in his life, even when he focused on the fabric of things around him in preparation to manipulate it. Except his eyes were not open.
"What the hell?!" Ash sat up so abruptly it startled Storm. He recoiled when she moved with the fluid speed of a striking snake, crouched with her knife in hand, looking around the room for whatever had alarmed him.
Utterly unselfconscious in her nudity, Storm scanned the room. "What is it? Did you see something?"
Ash blinked several times, the residual image fading. "I am... not sure. For a moment, I thought I saw..." He shook his head, rubbing his eyes with the heels of his hands. "It's nothing. Must just be the aftermath of the past few days weighing on my mind."
"No, it is not nothing." Storm put the knife back in its sheath. She knelt in front of him, her green-gold eyes intent on his azure ones. "I can see in your eyes, I can hear in your heartbeat, it is not nothing. Describe what you saw."
"I'm not... sure how to describe it," Ash confessed. "Just that everything suddenly seemed more... vivid. More alive. But I am sure it is nothing, Aelia. Just my imagination—"
With her eyes shut, Storm reached up to touch his lips to silence him. "My Ash... Close your eyes." Curious, he did so without question. He felt her take his hands in hers, holding them tightly. He smiled, relaxing a little when she kissed his knuckles lightly. "Keep your eyes closed... I will open mine. Tell me if you see anything."
Ash chuckled softly. "My heart, I can't see anything if my eyes are clo— Dear goddess..." He inhaled sharply as he suddenly saw himself as if he looked in a mirror. But he could see more than the surface. He wasn't sure how he knew what he was seeing, but he knew it was his own heart, the old pains, the new joy, the lingering fears. "I'm seeing... what you see? This is how you see the world?" He opened his eyes to look into hers. With his eyes opened, he felt as if he was looking at himself and her at the same time. They both released each other's hands as if stung, shaking the double images from their minds. "How is this possible?"
Storm shook her head. "I do not know the how of it. I just know that among my people, it is possible for lifemates to share everything they sense with each other." Closing her eyes, she looked away. "At least, the old stories from before the Before Time spoke of it. It was merely a legend. Wistful yearnings for bonds more enduring than my short-lived people could know."
Ash considered for a long moment, drawing her hands to his lips to kiss. Silently, Storm moved to nestle against Ash, eyes closed. He smiled gently and nuzzled her neck. He caressed her cheek. "Open your eyes, Aelia." Facing the same direction, their visions blended. He sighed softly in awe. "Incredible... What is it you see?" he asked quietly. "Do you know?"
"Life energy," she replied quietly. "Here, it is so very overwhelming. There is so much life in your land. Like shouts in the markets all crowding the ears for attention. It is hard to focus on one thing for all the rest around it. Skyfire and I are getting more used to it now, but it is so hard to find quiet in the clamor before our eyes."
"Oh, beloved, no wonder you and Skyfire have been so agitated. I had no idea."
"What is it that you see?" She tilted her head, frowning slightly. "Everything is so... strange. Like I am seeing many, many tiny pieces all put together." She waved her hand in front of her. "Even the air?"
Ash chuckled softly. "Forenten mages can see the fabric of things, how they are made. Understanding that is how we can influence things. With enough focus, we can even change the fabric itself."
"So that is how magic works." Storm sighed, closing her eyes. "I wonder if my people knew that once, before Dzee was ripped away from Father. Now all we have is our vision and being able to see in time."
The despair about her people's lack made Ash's heart ache for Storm. "Beloved, your people's ability to see is no small thing. Your arts depend on your ability to see through... time." Ash straightened as realization struck. "Aelia... scry
like you had that day when the snow first fell." He could feel her reluctance and murmured, "Trust me, Aelia. I will keep you safe." After a few moments, the world shifted and he inhaled sharply. "By the gods...That's it! Storm! You are wonderful!" He kissed her soundly when she turned to look at him in bewilderment. "I know how we can save Almek!"
Chapter 65
Restless, Nolyn stepped out of the house, watching his breath form in the chill pre-dawn air. He arched an eyebrow as the drizzen made a welcoming noise and made his way out to the corral. He smiled to see he wasn't the only restless spirit up this early. "You couldn't sleep, either?"
Pausing in his greeting to his companion mount, Skyfire looked over his shoulder. "I've slept. I didn't want to disturb Lyra. She is exhausted from all the worrying for Storm and I she has had." Roughly scratching the drizzen's chin until she crooned, the Desanti man said in a low voice, "I wanted to thank you for reassuring her when I was..." Skyfire blinked and looked towards the house, drawing Nolyn's gaze to follow his.
The two men watched Storm and Ash emerge from the house, their hands clasped and fingers twined. Nolyn smiled indulgently. He looked over in surprise when Skyfire stated evenly, "Finally. It is about time they accepted each other."
Nolyn studied Skyfire, looking mildly surprised. "You never were a rival for her attentions, were you?"
Skyfire shook his head, looking back towards the drizzen who was nibbling on his arm lightly for attention. "No more than you were. Storm and I are th'yala. It is... the only intimate relationship Swordanzen are allowed to have. Nothing more."
"...An intimate relationship?" Nolyn looked at Skyfire. "You still love her, don't you?"
"Of course I do." Skyfire arched an eyebrow at Nolyn. He roughly scratched the drizzen's brow, the animal making a strange cooing noise in pleasure. "I have known they were meant for each other when he kept her from dying at the end of the Final Dance. It does not mean Storm and I cannot still care for each other."