by GM Scherbert
Setting up appointments to talk with an attorney and insurance people in the next two days is something that I take care of as Alex drives us home. As we drive back from Chicago to Zion I make note of the little differences I notice by not seeing this town everyday for the last four weeks. Pulling up into our driveway a short time later I am surprised to already see some of our family have arrived at our house for our dinner.
Chapter 7
Alex
Walking into the house we are surprised to see half of our family and friends are already there. As we sit around recalling the last month of travels slowly the rest of our family and friends arrive. We repeat the stories again and again before the house is full to the brim with those that we love. Putting out the plates we make sure that everyone takes their fill in food as we start to dig into the amazing home cooked food that has been arriving throughout the night.
Margaret and her husband Peter are last to arrive. We have known them for many years, actually the whole time we have been in Zion, all sixteen years. They have two boys that are older than our girls, Nick has to be twenty-four and Joshua has to be around twenty. Both of their boys are in the military and we have not seen them for years. Margaret and Peter have been enjoying not having kids in the house these last few years by traveling and involving themselves in lots and lots of social engagements. We have slowly grown apart over the years since the boys have moved out of the house, but when trouble comes you can always count on your close friends and family to stand by you.
The remainder of this evening along with the next two nights that we are in Zion, are meet with much of the same. Lots of friends and family stopping by and appointments with lawyers and insurance brokers fill our days and nights before we take off again on our way West on Sunday morning.
The girls have really found some great stops for us on this trip west. I am sure that we will go to Mount Rushmore, but Andrea has found a place that she has not been able to stop talking about, The Corn Palace in Mitchell South Dakota. I am not sure what caught her eye about this place but she is really excited about getting there. It is a short nine-hour drive from Chicago and we will stay at least one night to be able to explore this place that she has found.
Leaving the Corn Palace two days later, I am awed by what it was that we just visited. I will not dwell on it now as we make our way towards Mt. Rushmore. None of us have ever visited it before and we all are awed by the majesty of it when it finally comes into view. Spending only two days, the first of which we spend at Mount Rushmore and the next exploring the Black Hills we continue on our way.
We travel for another three days until we reach Seattle. Shannon takes the last leg of the trip driving as we pull into Seattle later that evening. We get to the hotel that we have booked for a week and start to map out some of the things that both us and the girls would like to do while we are here. On our list of things we have included Pikes Place, the Space Needle, and visiting Starbucks. I’m sure there is a lot more to see, but those were some of the top choices that we wanted to make sure we got to see.
Leaving Seattle, a week later we start our journey south and try to drive by the coastline as much as possible on our way to California. As we are leaving Seattle I notice that Shannon is slower to get moving and is having more pain than what we are being led to believe. After the first night as we make our way further towards San Diego I pull over in Sacramento early morning and we decide that Shannon will take a flight home as soon as possible.
Making plans for Shannon to get on a plane immediately, I contact our family and have someone at the airport when the plane lands later today. Letting airport personal know what is going on I have also contacted the doctors scheduling a doctor’s appointment for Shannon early tomorrow morning. The girls and I set a route for home as soon as the plane takes off and we plan to be there in a long three days.
Chapter 8
Shannon
It was a rough plane ride home to say the least. My dad came to get me at the airport and we headed straight to the hospital that the Doctor’s had told me to go to when I got home. It was rather a quick process from checking in to getting a room, they must have been told that I was coming.
When the first doctor shows up they tell me that I have taken a turn for the worse and should think about having home hospice or looking into staying at a hospice until the end. The care coordinator comes to my room and tells me that my insurance paperwork is all in order and whichever I decide will be set up quickly. When Alex and I had talked about this we had decided that I would stay at home for as long as possible, so I let the care coordinator knew that. She puts me in touch with two different agencies and they send someone over the next day to discuss the different options with me.
Trying to fall asleep that first night in the hospital knowing that Alex and the girls won’t be here for at least two if not three days only keeps me up. Knowing that they are traveling such a distance is somewhat worrisome to me. Alex has never been one to take the girls safety in hand but, it is still a long distance.
We check in with each other frequently during the days that we are apart making sure that we are talking through each step of what is going on, both with their drive home as well as what the doctors and care team are telling me. I let them know that the care coordinator has been by a few times and that I have decided to go with in home hospice nursing. As soon as they get back to Zion we will get the plans moving, the care team needs for there to be some family in the home before they will allow me out of the hospital.
Dad has been by every day that I have been here. Most of the rest of the family has also been here at some point over the last three days. Family members have been coming to see me for only short periods of time before leaving the hospital and me to return to their normal day to day lives. The same day to day lives that I will no longer have with Alex, Audrey, Andrea, and Annabelle.
The latest visitors were Margaret and Peter. I made sure to ask them to watch over Alex and the girls when I can no longer do so. I want to make sure that Alex is happy and that no matter what happens in the future, it is all that it can be for everyone who is left behind. They have agreed to watch over and prod Alex as much as needs to see that the life being led is one that should be led. A life which should be long, happy, and full of laughter and love until the day that it ends.
As I struggle with sleep that night, I know that Alex and the girls will be home and in turn here tomorrow. Knowing that they will be home safe puts my mind to ease a bit. I have found it hard to even go these past few days being away from them, but that is something that we will all need to get used to.
Chapter 9
Alex
The drive back from the West coast has been uneventful, but stressful to say the least. The girls and I have stopped each night and called Shannon to see what’s going on at the hospital. The doctors want the in-home hospice to start as soon as we get back to Zion. Shannon has set everything up with the care coordinator so we are all set to get the services at the house. Having someone with us full time is going to be a change, but with the care that Shannon will need, I am glad that someone with experience will be there with us. I am not sure how much that I would be able to do by myself, or really even with the girls trying to help.
The next weeks go by far too quickly. Shannon comes home the day after we get back into Zion and the hospice workers are at the house twenty-four hours a day after that. Having someone in your house every minute of every day is something that you would think would be awkward. We did not find this the case however, the nurses that were in our house were almost like family as soon as they walked in the front door. Hospice nurses must have one of the hardest jobs in the world and I for one am glad that we got some great ones to help with Shannon.
Shannon doesn’t start off needing much help but as the days pass more help is gradually needed each day. It starts off with nothing more than making sure the meds are given and being tracked, but within a few weeks it turns into full sup
port in all ways. Shannon even needs help getting out of and into bed, using the bathroom, and even drinking. Food is no longer being given seeing that it just serves to make the cancer spread faster. It is difficult to watch, but something that we all knew was coming.
The girls are back in school for the last few weeks of the school year as soon as we get back. Shannon and I are spending that time together, which is more for my benefit. About three weeks after Shannon came home from the hospital, the deterioration has been quick, which is exactly how the doctors told us that it could go. We think that there are probably only days left. It is hard watching the love of my life go through this, I just don’t know if I am strong enough to do this and every day I think about and question how I will go on.
When the girls get home from school a few days later, they notice a change and cling to Shannon. As they each say their goodnights and goodbyes we all have a feeling that it will be for the last time. The hospice workers have told us two days ago that with Shannon’s vitals and such there is probably not much time left. I give the girls all hugs and leave the room momentarily to tuck them in and when I return Shannon has gone into a deep sleep that never lifts.
A few short hours later and Shannon is gone and the stark new reality of my life is like a slap in the face. The girls stay home from school and we cry together for hours. As people come and go from the house Shannon’s dad comes over as well as my mom. We are trying to comfort each other and get through this dark time together.
The next weeks go by in a blur. The wake and funeral are attended by many family and friends, as well as lots of students from the present and past. As the days go on everyone slowly starts to get back to their lives, but I am left alone: without the other half of my soul, without a partner in life, without a father for my children, and without a husband to share it all with.
Throughout the story, not sure if you noticed, there were no uses of the pronouns he or she- well at least when speaking about the two main characters~
Shannon and Alexandra- this was done on purpose to build on most people stereotypes or misconceptions that breast cancer is a female thing. This story was written with that in mind and the twist of Shannon not being the wife but the husband has rocked more than a few people.
~Cancer fucking sucks and has affected more people that I love than I care to think about most days.
I lost my dad after only a six-week battle with Pancreatic Cancer too young and too quickly for my heart to take~
Unbroken Fates
By: GM Scherbert
Alex~
Being a single mom is nothing that I would have ever thought would happen to me, yet here I am raising three teenage girls by myself. Little time to myself, let alone to meet someone else. After, all the years I spent with Shannon, I am not sure that I want to.
When Nicholas comes into my life, it is like a freight train hits me. He is all consuming and it is something that I never want to end.
When I find out who he really is, I will never be the same.
I cannot be with him once I know.
No matter how much he has made his way into my pants, my life, my heart.
Nick~
I have wanted her for as long as I can remember. When I see her across the bar from me that night I knew I had to have her. I wasted no time in taking what I wanted, and had her underneath me that very night.
For a while I am truly and utterly happy. Being with her is something that I have never experienced before. I don’t want it to end.
When she finds out who I am, everything changes. She won’t be with me. She is afraid and scared.
She doesn’t understand this is what I have wanted since I was old enough to know what my dick should be used for.
She will be mine.
Chapter 1
Alex
It’s been a few years since Shannon died and each day I think about him still. I don’t cry near as much as I used to, but the tears still flow, and I still miss him almost as much as ever. Only within the last three or four months have I even started to head out with girlfriends, knowing that life goes on, even if my husband did not.
Being a single mom is nothing that I would have ever thought would happen to me, yet here I am raising three teenage girls by myself. The girls started to get back into a normal routine and within six months of their fathers passing they had finally fallen back into it completely. Audrey who is now in her senior year of high school is really looking forward to going to college next year. Getting away from Zion as quickly as she can. Andrea who is fifteen and in her freshman year, looking forward to getting her temps in only two short months. Then there is Annabelle, thirteen going on thirty if there ever was one. She is putting me through the ringer at every turn, never stopping herself from questioning each and every one of my decisions.
Margaret, Melissa, Ivette, and I have been friends for the majority of the time that I have lived in Zion. They are dragging me out with them for the first time since Shannon’s death. Not that they haven’t tried, because they sure as hell have, but because I couldn’t come up with an excuse quick enough to escape this torture, here I am, stuck. Ivette needs grown up time away from her nephew and niece that she is raising alone. Margaret needs a night away from her ball and chain, so that she can listen to something other than, as she puts it, him complain about all the shit their sons are into. Melissa on the other hand, as always, is the ring leader in this. She is single and has no problem heading out most nights of the weekend, fuck that the whole week, to find some fun. Even when the girls were young I always looked forward to seeing Melissa and hearing her stories from her previous escapades.
I am on the PTA and have been widowed for a little more than two years and I don’t want to get back out there. The girls, however, have different ideas about what I need and where tonight will lead. We are going out to a dance club for some god forsaken reason. Us, a bunch of over forty somethings, going to a place that we will by far be the oldest people in and for what? So that I can be thrown back into the dating scene, FML.
Getting out of the shower I reach, almost instinctively for the LulaRoes, knowing that comfort is the only thing that will keep this night somewhat bearable. Knowing that Melissa and Ivette arrived about ten minutes ago, I throw my hair up and head downstairs. Before I even reach the bottom step I hear, “awe hell no! Get back up those stairs, we are not going to fucking yoga class we are going out, and you sure as hell are not wearing those or heading out looking like that.”
FUCK ME!
Turning around I head back up the stairs, suddenly finding myself with two shadows following me. Ivette heads towards my bathroom and starts digging through makeup, while Melissa heads to my closet after putting her glass of wine on the nightstand. Shaking my head, I know that the comfort that I was so looking forward to tonight has just gone out the window. Sitting on the bed, taking a sip from her wine, kid you
I look towards Melissa, who walks out of the closet with empty hands before heading out the door into the hallway. I am not left to wonder long, before she returns with a dress out of Audrey’s room.
“Missy, what are you doing? I am not wearing that out tonight, come on.”
“Then you better get your ass up and find something in that closet that you can wear out.”
As I get up off the bed Melissa slaps me on the ass before lying out on the bed reaching for her glass of wine. Heading to the dresser I reach for the bottom drawer sliding it open slowly. Moving a few things around I pull out a dress that has been hidden away and fling it on the bed.
“Oh see now, you were holding out on me,” Melissa says holding up the little black dress making it dance as she does. “This is perfect, and I saw a pair of red heels in there that would be perfect.” Getting off of the bed she heads back into the closet as I change into the dress.
Glancing towards the in-suite bathroom I see Ivette waving me over. As I get to the door I see that she has laid out an assortment of makeup and plugged in the curli
ng iron.
“Sit down Alex, let me get a hold of that hair quick so we can get going.” Sitting on the side of the bathtub I hear Melissa talking from the other room. It gets louder as she walks into the bathroom with the red heels. Closing her phone, she puts it in her pocket as she looks towards us.
“Margaret is out. She has to stay home or some shit because Peter isn’t feeling well. Ugh fucking dudes.”
Laughing at her, I feel a tug on my hair before I can answer her. “Look straight ahead Alex, I am trying to get this hair to match that hot as hell little black dress.”
When Ivette finishes up with my hair she steps in front of me and does my makeup quick, putting it on much heavier than I ever would. As we head back downstairs, I let the girls know that I’m heading out and if they need anything to call. Audrey lets me know that I don’t need to worry, that I should go out and have a good night, try to make some new friends.
HA! New friends, that is just what I don’t need. The ones I’m heading out with tonight seem to have it in for me the way it is. Heading for the Square, I feel our night is about to get a lot more interesting.
Chapter 2
Nick
When I got done serving my country it didn’t take long for me to reach out to my local veteran affairs office and find some other soldiers to shoot the shit with. Serving overseas is not something you forget easily and having someone to talk about that shit with, is a great way for me to heal. Plus, it really helps me keep my chair filled at the tattoo shop. I have made a name for myself doing it, I even have a guy, Gun, who does tattoos for his MC near Chicago, come get some ink from me a couple times. Of course, we meet through the Veteran Affairs office, but he appreciated my work and has let me do a few pieces on his back.