It’s the change that Andy had dedicated his life to pushing forward.
It’s the change that made possible, just one year after the disastrous election of Donald Trump, the historic victories of trans candidates running to serve in city halls, on school boards, and finally, in one of the nation’s oldest state legislatures.
And it’s the change that allowed me—someone who just four years before couldn’t bring myself to say the words “I’m transgender” in my mirror—to stand onstage at the Democratic National Convention and declare before the nation that I am a “proud transgender American.”
And we have not come this far to stop now. Not with so much work left to do. In too many places, LGBTQ people are still denied the equal protection of the law. Transgender people, and particularly trans women of color, continue to face an epidemic of violence as 2017 became the deadliest year on record for the trans community. From Texas to North Carolina, hateful laws remain on the books. Barriers still exist. Challenges continue. And through it all, the fundamental truth remains that no one in the LGBTQ community is totally equal until everyone—from the gay Muslim refugee, to the queer undocumented immigrant, to the transgender woman of color—is treated with dignity and fairness.
We must never be pacified by our progress or content with the pace of change. But we must always remember just how far we’ve come and hold firm to our vision of a fairer, more just society.
Every day matters in this fight. But I remain as hopeful as ever that tomorrow will be different. That someday, generations from now, when our understanding of “We the People” finally includes everyone, a young trans student or a young queer student will grow up and learn about this struggle for justice and equality in those history books. And they’ll never have to know what this progress felt like, because they will never know anything different.
That will be because of the courage of the countless LGBTQ people who dared to walk down the street as the person they are or with the one they love. It will be because of advocates and activists who dreamed of a different world. It will be because of the allies who stood up and spoke out. It will be because of our generation.
We are powerful. We are making history. And, together, I know that we are unstoppable.
Studies and Resources
CHAPTER 1
Grant, Jamie M., Lisa A. Mottet, and Justin Tanis. “Injustice at Every Turn: A Report of the National Transgender Discrimination Survey.” National Center for Transgender Equality and the National Gay and Lesbian Task Force (2011). http://www.thetaskforce.org/downloads/reports/reports/ntds_full.pdf.
CHAPTER 2
Durso, Laura E., and Gary J. Gates. “Serving Our Youth: Findings from a National Survey of Service Providers Working with Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender Youth Who Are Homeless or at Risk of Becoming Homeless.” The Williams Institute with True Colors Fund and the Palette Fund (2012). https://williamsinstitute.law.ucla.edu/wp-content/uploads/Durso-Gates-LGBT-Homeless-Youth-Survey-July-2012.pdf.
CHAPTER 3
James, Sandy E., Jody L. Herman, Susan Rankin, Mara Keisling, Lisa Mottet, and Ma’ayan Anafi. “The Report of the 2015 U.S. Transgender Survey.” The National Center for Transgender Equality (2016). http://www.transequality.org/sites/default/files/docs/usts/USTS%20Full%20Report%20-%20FINAL%201.6.17.pdf.
“A Matter of Life and Death: Fatal Violence Against the Transgender Community in 2016.” Human Rights Campaign and Trans People of Color Coalition (2016). https://assets.hrc.org//files/assets/resources/A-Matter-of-Life-and-Death-2016.pdf?_ga=2.187411115.226333368.1506486663-1029459558.1454633482.
CHAPTER 5
“2016 State Equality Index: A Review of State Legislation Affecting the Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender and Queer Community and a Look Ahead in 2017.” Human Rights Campaign and Equality Federation Institute (2016). http://assets.hrc.org//files/assets/resources/SEI-2016-Report-FINAL.pdf?_ga=2.249603461.226333368.1506486663-1029459558.1454633482.
CHAPTER 6
Flores, Andrew R., Jody L. Herman, Gary J. Gates, and Taylor N. T. Brown. “How Many Adults Identify as Transgender in the United States?” The Williams Institute (2016). http://williamsinstitute.law.ucla.edu/wp-content/uploads/How-Many-Adults-Identify-as-Transgender-in-the-United-States.pdf.
Grant, Mottet, and Tanis. “Injustice at Every Turn: A Report of the National Transgender Discrimination Survey.”
CHAPTER 7
James, Herman, Rankin, Keisling, Mottet, and Anafi. “The Report of the 2015 U.S. Transgender Survey.”
CHAPTER 8
“When Health Care Isn’t Caring: Lambda Legal’s Survey of Discrimination Against LGBT People and People with HIV.” Lambda Legal (2010). www.lambdalegal.org/health-care-report.
CHAPTER 11
“Sexual Orientation and Housing Discrimination in Michigan: A Report of Michigan’s Fair Housing Centers.” Fair Housing Center of Metropolitan Detroit, Fair Housing Center of Southeastern Michigan, Fair Housing Center of Southwest Michigan, and Fair Housing Center of West Michigan (2007). http://www.fhcmichigan.org/images/Arcus_web1.pdf.
Kosciw, Joseph G., Emily A. Greytak, Noreen M. Giga, Christian Villenas, and David J. Danischewski. “The 2015 National School Climate Survey: The Experiences of Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, and Queer Youth in Our Nation’s Schools.” GLSEN (2016). https://www.glsen.org/sites/default/files/2015%20National%20GLSEN%202015%20National%20School%20Climate%20Survey%20%28NSCS%29%20-%20Full%20Report_0.pdf.
McBride, Sarah, Laura E. Durso, Hannah Hussey, Sharita Gruberg, and Bishop Gene Robinson. “We the People: Why Congress and U.S. States Must Pass Comprehensive LGBT Nondiscrimination Protections.” Center for American Progress (2014). https://www.americanprogress.org/issues/lgbt/reports/2014/12/10/102804/we-the-people/.
CHAPTER 13
Staff. “More Than 400 Incidents of Hateful Harassment and Intimidation Since Election.” Southern Poverty Law Center (2016). https://www.splcenter.org/hatewatch/2016/11/15/update-more-400-incidents-hateful-harassment-and-intimidation-election.
ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
Well, that was a book and a process. I’m so grateful to my family, friends, and colleagues who helped make writing this possible. First, I couldn’t have done any of this had it not been for the amazing team at Crown Archetype, my kind, thoughtful, patient, and spectacular editor Jen Schuster, and the stellar broader editorial team of Trish Boczkowski and Jon Darga, as well as Kathleen, Tammy, Julie, Kathryn, and Maya in the marketing and publicity departments. At a certain point in the writing process, it felt like I was in the middle of the ocean, no land in sight, and unsure of whether I was going in the right direction. But Jen (and Trish and Jon while Jen was out) were my North Stars.
A huge set of thanks to my agent, Katie Zanecchia. I don’t know what I would have done had it not been for her careful read of so many drafts from the proposal to the final manuscript and her reassurances during my frequent flare-ups of impostor syndrome.
Endless thanks and love to my parents, Sally and Dave McBride, for being the most loving and caring people in the world. Nothing I do in this life would be possible without their love and support. As I say in the book, I lucked out in the parent lottery! A big thanks to Andy’s parents, Ardis, Richard, Steve, and Debbie, and the whole Cray-Sweeney crew. A huge “I love you” to my brothers and their significant others, Sean McBride and Blake Marks Landro and Dan McBride and Jamie Prater. I’m eternally indebted to my friends who have been by my side through so much, putting up with me interviewing many of them about memories and, generously, not rolling their eyes when I updated them on the book: Read Scott, Helen Boyer, Mat Marshall, Harry Berger, Liz Richards, Jaelyn Brown, Sarah Fulton, Alanna Mozeik, Tracey Ross, Sarah Baron, Kendall Bills, Wes Garson, Erin Fitzgerald, Kelsey Pacha, Heather Butt, Jaimie Ermak,
Kat Skiles, Kaela Jeffers, Bishop Gene Robinson, Joe Ste.Marie, Erika Zois, Chelsea Babcock, Riley Fujisaki, Taylor Yeates, Eric Reath, Adam Daniel-Wayman, Brett Atanasio, Palak Gosar, Dr. Laura Durso, Sharita Gruberg, Kellan Baker, Rebecca Fox, Jose Morales, Liz Glaser, Mara Keisling, Lisa Mottet, Lisa Goodman, and Mark Purpura.
I couldn’t have written this thing and kept my job had it not been for my accommodating, tireless, fearless, and effective colleagues at the Human Rights Campaign, in particular, Liz Halloran, Jay Brown, Chris Sgro, Chad Griffin, Olivia Alair Dalton, David Stacy, and J. Dee Winterhof. I’ll never forget my former colleague at the Center for American Progress, Lauren Vicary, who told me years ago to write a book.
I’m so in awe of our former vice president, Joe Biden, for his leadership and compassion, and grateful for his willingness to write the foreword to this book. I can’t imagine what my ten-year-old self would say if I had been told then that this would happen. I’m still freaking out. Thank you to Gautam Raghavan and Louisa Terrell at the Biden Foundation. Sonia Sloan is an inspiring advocate in Delaware, and she was instrumental in the beginning stages of the foreword.
Had it not been for the incomparable Roddy Flynn and the LGBT Equality Caucus, who invited me to speak at the convention—with, of course, the permission of Hillary Clinton and her team—this whole adventure would have never been set into motion.
I feel privileged to have been mentored by two amazing leaders, Jack Markell and the late Beau Biden. They took me under their wings, gave unique opportunities to a cringe-worthy seventeen-year-old, and supported me before and after I came out. A quick shout-out to the Great State of Delaware for being small but mighty, and for always feeling like home.
Finally, to Andy, my bean, I love you forever and ever. I miss you every day. I think about you always. I perpetually ask myself, “What Would Andy Do?” I would give anything to have you back.
I hope I’ve made you proud.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Sarah McBride is a progressive activist and currently the national press secretary at the Human Rights Campaign, the nation’s largest LGBTQ civil rights organization. In 2016, Sarah made history when she became the first openly transgender person to address a major party convention.
A native of Wilmington, Delaware, Sarah has been involved in politics and progressive advocacy for more than a decade. She worked for the campaigns of Governor Jack Markell (D-DE) and Attorney General Beau Biden (D-DE). During her sophomore year of college, Sarah made national headlines when, at the end of her term as student body president at American University, she came out publicly as transgender in the student newspaper. She went on to intern in the Obama White House, the first openly trans woman to do so, and after graduating from college, she helped lead the successful effort to pass gender identity nondiscrimination protections in Delaware.
Now as a spokesperson for the nation’s largest LGBTQ advocacy organization, Sarah has become one of America’s most public voices in the fight for LGBTQ equality, culminating in her address before the nation during the 2016 presidential election. She has been featured in the New York Times, the Washington Post, Time, Cosmopolitan, Elle, Vogue, Rolling Stone, and The New Yorker, and she speaks regularly at national LGBTQ and political events.
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Tomorrow Will Be Different Page 29