by RM Walker
“But we’ve waited a long time for you. We aren’t fucking it up by scaring you away,” Josh said.
“You weren’t scaring me. I trust you. If it gets too much I’ll say.”
“And we’ll always listen,” Josh promised her.
They shifted until Josh had his head resting on her chest and Jake’s head on her stomach. She stroked her fingers through their hair making them hum contentedly. It was like having two big panthers lying on her, purring.
More of the grey clouds had broken away, revealing the blue sky above. She inhaled deeply and let it go slowly. They’d strung her tight with kisses and touches but holding and being held was relaxing her into a comfortable lethargy.
“It’s beautiful here, thanks for bringing me. Was this where we were all going today?” she asked.
“Dunno, hadn’t got that far,” Jake mumbled.
“Matt wants us to take you to the Jamaica Inn. He’s been dying to take you there. There’s a smuggler’s exhibition he wants to drag you around.”
“I’ve always wanted to go there. He remembered.”
“Yeah, he said you’d told him about it.” Josh shifted, scratched the side of his nose, and wrapped his arm around her. “We can go next weekend.”
Excitement rippled through her then dropped away. “If everything is okay by then.”
“Look.” Josh spoke firmly, but he didn’t move. “We’ll get through whatever Drew throws at us. Even if Jonas had betrayed us. The five of us together is all we need.”
“If Matt and Nate can work it out,” she reminded them.
“Teething problems,” Josh replied. “No one here is perfect. But those morons are forgetting one thing; it’s your decision, not theirs or ours.”
“And they’re assuming a bloody lot,” Jake added.
“What?”
“That you want to take our relationship with you that far. It could be too soon for you.”
“Are you?”
“Are we what?” asked Josh.
“Are you wanting to get more intimate with me?” Lily rolled her eyes. “That sounds like some sort of therapist’s line.”
“We wanted to get down and dirty with you thirty seconds after seeing you in class the first time.” Jake laughed. “You were fucking gorgeous. All neat, prim, and proper, just begging for us to mess you up.”
“Ah, so it’s lust that’s the drawing factor.” She poked them both in the shoulder and went back to stroking through their hair.
“There’s an order to it,” Josh said. “Lust. Then lust and like. Then lust, like, and love.”
She held her breath, her fingers stilling in their hair. Was he saying what she thought he was saying? What she desperately wanted him to say? Because it was too late for her, they already held her heart and always would.
“In that exact order?” she asked, trying hard to sound casual as she slid her fingers through their hair again.
“Yeah. For us, yeah,” Josh whispered. They dislodged her hands, sitting up to look down at her. “We’ve worked through the list, Lily. We’re on the last step.”
“But we don’t want to frighten you,” Jake added.
“What are you saying?” She needed to hear them say it.
“We love you,” Josh said.
“We’ll never give you up,” Jake added.
She searched their eyes for the truth and found it there. Relief, love, delight, happiness. They all flooded through her. “I love you both too.”
They high fived each other and then kissed her cheeks.
“You call the shots on this, Lily. We go at your speed,” Josh said.
Nate had said the same, and it filled her heart to the bursting point.
She needed to be as honest and as open as she’d been with Nate. “I’m not ready yet, my body obviously is, but it still scares me a little.”
“We won’t push you, we promise.”
“I know,” she reassured them, touching their cheeks as they hovered above her.
“Baby, this isn’t just about sex, it’s you we want, all of you,” Jake said. “We aren’t going to push you, but it won’t be a one-time shag. You’re it for us.”
“You haven’t had girlfriends before, have you?”
“No. Why?”
“No one you fancied before? No one fancied you?” she asked, not understanding why not.
“Well, there have been girls we’ve liked, but it wasn’t returned. Amy Dewhurst was sort of a girlfriend when we were about nine. But our marble collection was the attraction for her. And she hated rats.” Josh sat back on his heels, looking at Jake.
“Rats?” She stared at them.
“Yeah, we had rats.” Jake scratched his chin.
“Did your parents get a trap or call in the pest people?”
Josh stared at her as if she’d just suggested something truly horrific. “Why would we do that? They were family. Bill and Ben.”
“Oh! You mean you had pet rats. Ewww!” She screwed up her face. “Isn’t that asking for the plague or something?”
“What the fuck? Joshua, we have to educate her.”
“Rats are—”
“Highly intelligent, incredibly clean, and make great pets,” Josh interjected. “Especially for kids. They rarely, if ever, bite and they love human interaction.”
She pulled a face in revulsion.
“We have to let you see one.”
“Oh god, no. It’s the tails, the tails are super creepy.”
“Joshua, we may have to re-think this whole relationship thing.”
She narrowed her eyes. “So, you like me, but you like rats more?”
“Do we have to answer that today? Can we think about it for a bit?” Josh teased her.
“Ah, I see.” She made to get up, but they pushed her back down.
“Don’t be silly, of course, we like rats better than we like you, but if you repent, it’ll raise you to an almost equal status with them.” Jake waggled his eyebrows.
“I don’t have to like you, y’know.”
“But you do anyway, because we are irresistible and meant for you, babe.” Josh lowered his head and kissed her.
“And you are meant for us,” Jake added, stealing a kiss after Josh sat up.
Josh lay on his back and lifted Lily to rest on his arm. He turned into her, his hand going to her hip. Jake rested his cheek on her chest and wrapped an arm around her stomach.
“Did you really have rats for pets?” she asked, stroking one hand through Jake’s hair and holding onto Josh’s hand with her other.
“Yeah, we were in primary. Took them to school and everything. They’d stay in our pockets and weren’t a problem,” Josh said.
“Could you, well, whisper to them?”
Josh snorted into her hair, but it was Jake who answered her.
“We could.” Jake yawned. “We’d know if they were happy, or hurt, or hungry. We knew when they were dying.”
“Aww, that’s sad.”
“We got Pyewacket after that. Mum wasn’t having rats in the house again,” Josh said.
“She doesn’t like them either?”
“She didn’t mind them when they were in their cage, but they didn’t like being confined. Rats are normally nocturnal, so she thought they were asleep under the newspaper and straw. She didn’t know we let them out before she came down in the morning. They were sneaky little things; they knew to hide from her.”
“They were sneaky little things? Don’t you mean you were sneaky little things?”
“You try living in a cage,” Josh grumbled. “They didn’t do any harm.”
“Except for when they’d chew up Dad’s newspapers,” Jake said.
“Yeah, and the time Mum found them in her underwear drawer making a nest from her tights.”
“They didn’t mean to put holes in all of them,” Jake muttered.
“And they never meant to scare Aunt June.” Josh stroked his fingers across her palm as he spoke.
“Wha
t happened?”
“She came over the day after we got them. Mum must have forgotten to tell her about them.”
“She didn’t know either, Joshua,” Jake said. “She found out at the same time. That was when dad brought the cage home for us.”
“Oh, yeah. Anyway, Aunt June was sitting in the front room. They only wanted to know who she was.”
“They’d been hiding inside the curtains. They must have climbed up and then jumped onto her shoulders.” Jake sniggered.
“Unfortunately, she had a cup of tea in her hand. She screamed like the hounds of hell were after her, and sent the tea everywhere,” Josh carried on.
“Mum was screaming, Aunt June was screaming, Bill and Ben were screaming and absolutely terrified. The back door was open, and half the fucking village could hear. Aunt May came rushing up and the three of them were trying to get us to catch them and drown them.”
Lily could hear the horror in Jake’s voice, and she couldn’t help but giggle at the mental image.
“Did you just laugh?” Jake demanded and poked her side.
“Sorry, it’s just, I can see them scrambling over chairs.”
“You’re about right. You’d have thought it was a major infestation of demons the way they carried on. Took us ages to get Bill and Ben to calm down.”
“What about your mum and aunts?”
“What about them?” Josh asked.
“How long did it take them to calm down from the fright?”
They went silent, and Lily couldn’t help but snort. “You didn’t realise they were terrified too?”
“Well, it was only Bill and Ben,” Jake hedged. “We did apologise. We also rang Dad and he brought the cage home and took Mum out to dinner as well. So, it wasn’t all that bad for her.”
“And we brought her flowers from the woods.”
“Your dad sounds nice. He didn’t mind them?”
“No, he’s quite laid back, bit like Nate’s dad, but without the whacky upbringing.”
“We miss Bill and Ben,” Jake said through a yawn.
It set Lily yawning, and almost instantly, Josh was yawning.
“Are you comfortable?” Jake asked her.
“Yeah.” She closed her eyes, turning her head to tuck her forehead into Josh’s neck.
“Let’s lie here for a bit, make our way back later,” Josh said.
Maybe she could buy them some pet rats for their birthday at the end of the month. She’d need to make sure April was okay with it first. An image of kissing them and a rat appearing on their shoulder popped into her head. No, maybe something else instead. She needed to think about Nate first, and it made her eyes fly open.
“Nate’s birthday is Wednesday.”
“Yeah.” Jake sounded half a sleep.
“I need to get him something. Can we go into town after college tomorrow if we ask Matt? Oh.” She’d forgotten about their argument.
“Yeah, good idea. We’ll sort it when we see Matt tonight.”
“Thanks.” Lily didn’t say anything, but she wasn’t as confident as they were. She settled closer into Josh, Jake moving with her. She yawned and let the peace around them settle her.
Est poena mortis
Lily flung open the front door in irritation. She stepped out and the noise grew louder. The source of the ruckus was Jonas and her boys gathered around Drew. They were furious, all shouting at the same time. Matt was ripping into Nate for sleeping with her, Drew was yelling at Jonas about lying. Jonas was yelling at Drew for killing Sarah. The twins were hollering at all of them, demanding to know who’d eaten Bill and Ben.
“Oh, for goodness sake. Stop shouting,” she yelled.
“They’ve been at it for hours. I’m surprised they didn’t wake you sooner.”
Lily looked at her mother sitting in front of her easel on the tiny patch of grass they laughingly called a front garden.
“Well they need to stop,” Lily snapped.
“You won’t be able to stop them until it’s too late.”
“Too late? For what? Some peace around here so I can sleep?” Lily shook her head, folded her arms, and glared at them.
“You didn’t listen. You’ve always been such a good girl. I never had any problems with you, Lilith. Not until we came here, and he found you.”
“He always knew where I was.” Lily crossed to look at the canvas. “What are you doing?” She raised her eyebrows at the large swashes of black her mother was painting over a portrait of a woman. She moved closer and realised it was her on the canvas. “Why are you painting over me?”
“I’m hiding you, darling. If I hide you, they can’t find you.”
“Ah, well that makes sense.” Lily dropped a kiss on her mother’s head. “Thank you.”
Another noise joined the shouting, like a hunting horn blown repeatedly. A pack of hounds were running towards the village, huntsmen on horses not far behind. They reached the village and the lead huntsman lifted his arm straight up and the riders came to a halt.
Her heart went out to the poor fox they were running down. Maybe the twins could help to hide it. She looked over at them and her heart leapt into her throat. They weren’t hunting an animal; they were hunting her boys.
“Run!” She screamed at them. “Run, please, run!”
They made no response continuing to argue and shout.
“Run!” she shrieked, terror racing through her. “The hunt! The hunt is coming for you. Run!”
“It’s too late, Lilith,” her mother said. “You can’t out run the hunt. You didn’t listen and now we’re going to die.”
“No! I won’t let you kill them. I won’t!” Lily tried to open the gate, but it was stuck.
A single huntsman detached himself from the others and came trotting forwards on the largest horse she’d ever seen. The rider’s lower face was covered with a black scarf, his hair covered by a riding hat low enough to cast his eyes into shade. But it was the horse that sent her stumbling back from the gate. Flames flickered in its eye sockets, smoke poured from its nostrils and mouth. Every step it took, the road beneath its hooves melted into sticky, black tar. It neighed, revealing metal points for teeth and a black tongue.
“Nigro notanda lapillo.”
The words were echoed around her, in her head, in her heart. Thick, black words that poisoned every breath she took.
“You’ve been marked with a black pebble. It’s Latin, y’know.”
“What? I don’t understand.”
“You’ve been found guilty, Lily. Black pebble for guilt, white for acquittal. Don’t they teach you anything in school these days?”
“Est poena mortis.” The huntsman turned the horse to the middle of the road.
“What? Mortis, like mortal? Mum, what does it mean?” she cried out.
“Penalty is death.”
Horrified, she saw another mounted huntsman detached himself from the group, draw a sword from his side, and canter towards the boys.
“No!” She was out of time, unable to help them.
The huntsman lifted the sword high and brought it down in a wide arc as he rode past them. Bile rose up her throat, and she vomited as their decapitated bodies fell to the ground.
Screams ripped from her throat as she stumbled towards her mother.
“I told you, it’s too late. You’re next.” Her mother sank to her knees as she spoke. The huntsman stood behind her, holding aloft a sword.
“Mortem.”
“Death,” her mother rasped and fell forwards onto the ground, her head no longer attached to her body.
“Mortem.”
Time slowed as he stepped over her mother’s body. Sunlight glinted on his sword, its edge dripping crimson blood. He swung it high and warmth spread down her legs as the sword descended, slicing fire into her neck.
“WAKE UP!”
Lily jerked awake, frantically feeling around her neck. Josh’s face came into view above her. Relief crashed through her, and she sat up, flinging her a
rms around his neck. “Oh god, you’re alive!”
“You were dreaming.” Jake spoke beside her, and she dragged him into her as well.
“Oh god, you were dead, you were all killed.” She buried her head into Josh’s chest, tears coursing down her cheeks, soaking into his hoodie.
“No one’s dead, Lily, it was just a dream,” Josh reassured her, stroking her back.
“It was so real.”
“All the worst ones are,” Jake replied, rubbing her back.
“If you talk about it you won’t dream it again,” Josh prompted her.
She took a deep breath and told them every detail, she left nothing out, including the bite of the sword on her neck.
“I was petrified, I’ve never been so scared, not even at Matt’s that time. I knew I was going to die. I’d watched you die, Mum die, and I was next. I saw the sword coming down on me and—” She curled her hands into fists, her fingernails biting in to her palms, trying to rid herself of the images in her head.
“Dream? That was a soul-destroying nightmare,” Jake muttered.
“Was it a dream?” Josh looked between her and Jake. “Was it a dream or a vision?”
“You’re suggesting there’s beheadings in our future?” Jake pulled a face.
“You think it was a vision?” Lily shook Josh’s arm to get his attention. “Seriously? We need to...I don’t know. What do we do?” Panic flooded her, swiftly followed by fear.
“We don’t panic,” Josh said. “We need to get back to the others and tell them.”
“And Jonas? Drew? Do we tell them?” she asked as they got up.
“We talk to Nate and Matt first and make a decision together.” Jake took her hands, pulling her up and into his arms. “It’ll be okay.”
“I hope so,” she whispered. “I can’t lose you, any of you.”
Josh moved in behind her and wrapped his arms around her, cocooning her between them. “It’s probably nothing more than a nightmare.”
“A lot has gone on today. Bugger, a lot has gone on for weeks now. We gave you cheese sandwiches and then you fell asleep. It could be a combination of lots of things built up and confused into a nightmare.” Jake kissed the top of her head.
She clung to them, the horror still crouched at the back of her mind, and she prayed he was right.