“And do you comprehend, Grimaud?” said Aramis.
Grimaud made a sign in the affirmative.
“That’s all that is necessary,” said Athos; “now for my idea.”
“I should like, however, to comprehend,” said Porthos.
“That is useless.”
“Yes, yes! Athos’s idea!” cried Aramis and D’Artagnan, at the same time.
“This Milady, this woman, this creature, this demon, has a brother-in-law, as I think you told me, D’Artagnan?”
“Yes, I know him very well; and I also believe that he has not a very warm affection for his sister-in-law.”
“There is no harm in that. If he detested her, it would be all the better,” replied Athos.
“In that case we are as well off as we wish.”
“And yet,” said Porthos, “I would like to know what Grimaud is about.”
“Silence, Porthos!” said Aramis.
“What is her brother-in-law’s name?”
“Lord de Winter.”
“Where is he now?”
“He returned to London at the first sound of war.”
“Well, there’s just the man we want,” said Athos. “it is he whom we must warn. We will have him informed that his sister-in-law is on the point of having someone assassinated, and beg him not to lose sight of her. There is in London, I hope, some establishment like that of the Magdalens, or of the Repentant Daughters.at He must place his sister in one of these, and we shall be in peace.”
“Yes,” said D’Artagnan, “till she comes out.”
“Ah, my faith!” said Athos, “you require too much, D’Artagnan. I have given you all I have, and I beg leave to tell you that this is the bottom of my sack.”
“But I think it would be still better,” said Aramis, “to inform the queen and Lord de Winter at the same time.”
“Yes; but who is to carry the letter to Tours, and who to London?”
“I answer for Bazin,” said Aramis.
“And I for Planchet,” said D’Artagnan.
“Ay,” said Porthos, “if we cannot leave the camp, our lackeys may.”
“To be sure they may; and this very day we will write the letters,” said Aramis. “Give the lackeys money, and they will start.”
“We will give them money?” replied Athos. “Have you any money?”
The four friends looked at one another, and a cloud came over the brows which but lately had been so cheerful.
“Look out!” cried D’Artagnan, “I see black points and red points moving yonder. Why did you talk of a regiment, Athos? It is a veritable army! ”
“My faith, yes,” said Athos; “there they are. See the sneaks come, without drum or trumpet. Ah, ah! have you finished, Grimaud?”
Grimaud made a sign in the affirmative, and pointed to a dozen bodies which he had set up in the most picturesque attitudes. Some carried arms, others seemed to be taking aim, and the remainder appeared merely to be sword in hand.
“Bravo!” said Athos; “that does honor to your imagination.”
“All very well,” said Porthos, “but I should like to understand.”
“Let us decamp first, and you will understand afterward.”
“A moment, gentlemen, a moment; give Grimaud time to clear away the breakfast.”
“Ah, ah!” said Aramis, “the black points and the red points are visibly enlarging. I am of D’Artagnan’s opinion; we have no time to lose in regaining our camp.”
“My faith,” said Athos, “I have nothing more to say against a retreat. We bet upon one hour, and we have stayed an hour and a half. Nothing can be said; let us be off, gentlemen, let us be off!”
Grimaud was already ahead, with the basket and the dessert. The four friends followed, ten paces behind him.
“What the devil shall we do now, gentlemen?” cried Athos.
“Have you forgotten anything?” said Aramis.
“The white flag, morbleu! We must not leave a flag in the hands of the enemy, even if that flag be but a napkin.”
And Athos ran back to the bastion, mounted the platform, and bore off the flag; but as the Rochellais had arrived within musket range, they opened a terrible fire upon this man, who appeared to expose himself for pleasure’s sake.
But Athos might be said to bear a charmed life. The balls passed and whistled all round him; not one struck him.
Athos waved his flag, turning his back on the guards of the city, and saluting those of the camp. On both sides loud cries arose—on the one side cries of anger, on the other cries of enthusiasm.
A second discharge followed the first, and three balls, by passing through it, made the napkin really a flag. Cries were heard from the camp, “Come down! come down!”
Athos came down; his friends, who anxiously awaited him, saw him return with joy.
“Come along, Athos, come along!” cried D’Artagnan; “now we have found everything except money, it would be stupid to be killed.”
But Athos continued to march majestically, whatever remarks his companions made; and they, finding their remarks useless, regulated their pace by his.
Grimaud and his basket were far in advance, out of the range of the balls.
At the end of an instant they heard a furious fusillade.
“What’s that?” asked Porthos, “what are they firing at now? I hear no balls whistle, and I see nobody!”
“They are firing at the corpses,” replied Athos.
“But the dead cannot return their fire.”
“Certainly not! They will then fancy it is an ambuscade, they will deliberate; and by the time they have found out the pleasantry, we shall be out of the range of their balls. That renders it useless to get a pleurisy by too much haste.”
“Oh, I comprehend now,” said the astonished Porthos.
“That’s lucky,” said Athos, shrugging his shoulders.
On their part, the French, on seeing the four friends return at such a step, uttered cries of enthusiasm.
At length a fresh discharge was heard, and this time the balls came rattling among the stones around the four friends, and whistling sharply in their ears. The Rochellais had at last taken possession of the bastion.
“These Rochellais are bungling fellows,” said Athos; “how many have we killed of them—a dozen?”
“Or fifteen.”
“How many did we crush under the wall?”
“Eight or ten.”
“And in exchange for all that not even a scratch! Ah, but what is the matter with your hand, D’Artagnan? It bleeds, seemingly.”
“Oh, it’s nothing,” said D’Artagnan.
“A spent ball?”
“Not even that.”
“What is it, then?”
We have said that Athos loved D’Artagnan like a child, and this somber and inflexible personage felt the anxiety of a parent for the young man.
“Only grazed a little,” replied D’Artagnan; “my fingers were caught between two stones—that of the wall and that of my ring—and the skin was broken.”
“That comes of wearing diamonds, my master,” said Athos, disdainfully.
“Ah, to be sure,” cried Porthos, “there is a diamond. Why the devil, then, do we plague ourselves about money, when there is a diamond?”
“Stop a bit!” said Aramis.
“Well thought of, Porthos; this time you have an idea.”
“Undoubtedly,” said Porthos, drawing himself up at Athos’s compliment; “as there is a diamond, let us sell it.”
“But,” said D’Artagnan, “it is the queen’s diamond.”
“The stronger reason why it should be sold,” replied Athos. “The queen saving Monsieur de Buckingham, her lover; nothing more just. The queen saving us, her friends; nothing more moral. Let us sell the diamond. What says Monsieur the Abbé? I don’t ask Porthos; his opinion has been given.”
“Why, I think,” said Aramis, blushing as usual, “that his ring not coming from a mistress, and consequently not being a
love token, D’Artagnan may sell it.”
“My dear Aramis, you speak like theology personified. Your advice, then, is—”
“To sell the diamond,” replied Aramis. “Well, then,” said D’Artagnan, gaily, “let us sell the diamond, and say no more about it.”
The fusillade continued; but the friends were out of reach, and the Rochellais only fired to appease their consciences.
“My faith, it was time that idea came into Porthos’s head. Here we are at the camp; therefore, gentlemen, not a word more of this affair. We are observed; they are coming to meet us. We shall be carried in triumph.”
In fact, as we have said, the whole camp was in motion. More than two thousand persons had assisted, as at a spectacle, in this fortunate but wild undertaking of the four friends—an undertaking of which they were far from suspecting the real motive. Nothing was heard but cries of “Live the Musketeers! Live the Guards!” M. de Busigny was the first to come and shake Athos by the hand, and acknowledge that the wager was lost. The dragoon and the Swiss followed him, and all their comrades followed the dragoon and the Swiss. There was nothing but felicitations, pressures of the hand, and embraces; there was no end to the inextinguishable laughter at the Rochellais. The tumult at length became so great that the cardinal fancied there must be some riot, and sent La Houdiniere, his captain of the Guards, to inquire what was going on.
The affair was described to the messenger with all the effervescence of enthusiasm.
“Well?” asked the cardinal, on seeing La Houdinière return.
“Well, monseigneur,” replied the latter, “three Musketeers and a Guardsman laid a wager with Monsieur de Busigny that they would go and breakfast in the bastion St. Gervais; and while breakfasting they held it for two hours against the enemy, and have killed I don’t know how many Rochellais.”
“Did you inquire the names of those three Musketeers?”
“Yes, monseigneur.”
“What are their names?”
“Messieurs Athos, Porthos, and Aramis.”
“Still my three brave fellows!” murmured the cardinal. “And the Guardsman?”
“D’Artagnan.”
“Still my young scapegrace. Positively, these four men must be on my side.”
That same evening the cardinal spoke to M. de Tréville of the exploit of the morning, which was the talk of the whole camp. M. de Tréville, who had received the account of the adventure from the mouths of the heroes of it, related it in all its details to his Eminence, not forgetting the episode of the napkin.
“That’s well, Monsieur de Tréville,” said the cardinal; “pray let that napkin be sent to me. I will have three fleur-de-lis embroidered on it in gold, and will give it to your company as a standard.”
“Monseigneur,” said M. de Tréville, “that will be unjust to the Guardsmen. Monsieur d’Artagnan is not with me; he serves under Monsieur Dessessart.”
“Well, then, take him,” said the cardinal; “when four men are so much attached to one another, it is only fair that they should serve in the same company.”
That same evening M. de Tréville announced this good news to the three Musketeers and D’Artagnan, inviting all four to breakfast with him next morning.
D’Artagnan was beside himself with joy. We know that the dream of his life had been to become a Musketeer. The three friends were likewise greatly delighted.
“My faith,” said D’Artagnan to Athos, “you had a triumphant idea! As you said, we have acquired glory, and were enabled to carry on a conversation of the highest importance.”
“Which we can resume now without anybody suspecting us, for, with the help of God, we shall henceforth pass for cardinalists.”
That evening D’Artagnan went to present his respects to M. Dessessart, and inform him of his promotion.
M. Dessessart, who esteemed D’Artagnan, made him offers of help, as this change would entail expenses for equipment.
D’Artagnan refused, but finding the opportunity a good one, he begged him to have the diamond he put into his hand valued, as he wished to turn it into money.
The next day, at eight in the morning, M. Dessessart’s valet came to D’Artagnan’s lodging, and gave him a bag containing seven thousand livres.
This was the price of the queen’s diamond.
48
A FAMILY AFFAIR
Athos had invented the phrase, family affair. A family affair was not subject to the investigation of the cardinal; a family affair concerned nobody. People might employ themselves in a family affair before all the world. Therefore Athos had invented the phrase, family affair.
Aramis had discovered the idea, the lackeys.
Porthos had discovered the means, the diamond.
D’Artagnan alone had discovered nothing—he, ordinarily the most inventive of the four; but it must be also said that the very name of Milady paralyzed him.
Ah! no, we were mistaken; he had discovered a purchaser for his diamond.
The breakfast at M. de Tréville’s was as gay and cheerful as possible. D’Artagnan already wore his uniform—for being nearly of the same size as Aramis, and as Aramis was so liberally paid by the publisher who purchased his poem as to allow him to buy everything double, he sold his friend a complete outfit.
D’Artagnan would have been at the height of his wishes if he had not constantly seen Milady like a dark cloud hovering in the horizon.
After breakfast, it was agreed that they should meet again in the evening at Athos’s lodging, and there finish their plans.
D’Artagnan passed the day in exhibiting his Musketeer’s uniform in every street of the camp.
In the evening, at the appointed hour, the four friends met. There only remained three things to decide—what they should write to Milady’s brother; what they should write to the clever person at Tours; and which should be the lackeys to carry the letters.
Everyone offered his own. Athos talked of the discretion of Grimaud, who never spoke a word but when his master unlocked his mouth. Porthos boasted of the strength of Mousqueton, who was big enough to thrash four men of ordinary size. Aramis, confiding in the address of Bazin, made a pompous eulogium on his candidate. Finally, D’Artagnan had entire faith in the bravery of Planchet, and reminded them of the manner in which he had conducted himself in the ticklish affair of Boulogne.
These four virtues disputed the prize for a length of time, and gave birth to magnificent speeches which we do not repeat here for fear they should be deemed too long.
“Unfortunately,” said Athos, “he whom we send must possess in himself alone the four qualities united.”
“But where is such a lackey to be found?”
“Not to be found!” cried Athos. “I know it well; so take Grimaud.”
“Take Mousqueton.”
“Take Bazin.”
“Take Planchet. Planchet is brave and shrewd; they are two qualities out of the four.”
“Gentlemen,” said Aramis, “the principal question is not to know which of our four lackeys is the most discreet, the most strong, the most clever, or the most brave; the principal thing is to know which loves money the best.”
“What Aramis says is very sensible,” replied Athos; “we must speculate upon the faults of people, and not upon their virtues. Monsieur Abbé, you are a great moralist.”
“Doubtless,” said Aramis, “for we not only require to be well served in order to succeed, but moreover, not to fail; for in case of failure, heads are in question, not for our lackeys—”
“Speak lower, Aramis,” said Athos.
“That’s wise—not for the lackeys,” resumed Aramis, “but for the master—for the masters, we may say. Are our lackeys sufficiently devoted to us to risk their lives for us? No.”
“My faith,” said D’Artagnan, “I would almost answer for Planchet.”
“Well, my dear friend, add to his natural devotedness a good sum of money, and then, instead of answering for him once, answer for him twice.”
“Not at all,” cried D’Artagnan, who was anxious the matter should be accomplished; “on the contrary, I think it very easy. It would be, no doubt, parbleu, if we write to Lord de Winter about affairs of vast importance, of the horrors of the cardinal—”
“Speak lower!” said Athos. “—of intrigues and secrets of state,” continued D’Artagnan, complying with the recommendation. “There can be no doubt we would all be broken on the wheel; but for God’s sake, do not forget, as you yourself said, Athos, that we only write to him concerning a family affair; that we only write to him to entreat that as soon as Milady arrives in London he will put it out of her power to injure us. I will write to him, then, nearly in these terms.”
“Let us see,” said Athos, assuming in advance a critical look.
“Monsieur and dear friend— ”
“Ah, yes! Dear friend to an Englishman,” interrupted Athos; well commenced! Bravo, D’Artagnan! Only with that word you would be quartered instead of being broken on the wheel.”
“Well, perhaps. I will say, then, Monsieur, quite short.”
“You may even say, My Lord,” replied Athos, who stickled for propriety.
“My Lord, do you remember the little goat pasture of the Luxembourg? ”
“Good, the Luxembourg!au One might believe this an allusion to the queen-mother! That’s ingenious,” said Athos.
“Well, then, we will put simply, My Lord, do you remember a certain little enclosure where your life was spared?”
“My dear D’Artagnan, you will never make anything but a very bad secretary. Where your life was spared! For shame! that’s unworthy. A man of spirit is not to be reminded of such services. A benefit reproached is an offense committed.”
Three Musketeers (Barnes & Noble Classics Series) Page 58