by Deborah Carr
“Everything okay at home?”
“Seems so,” she didn’t add that her father had plans to sell the farm so soon. “How are things going on at your current job.”
“Fine,” he said, turning into the farmhouse driveway. “I’d rather be working here though.”
“You’ll soon be back,” she said to cover her delight at his words. “Come inside. I’ll make us coffee and show you my handiwork.”
Tom followed her to the kitchen leaning against the counter as she put on the kettle.
“Right,” said Gemma, pushing the plate of biscuits towards him. “Let’s enjoy some of these, shall we?”
They drank their coffee and made small talk about the village and the shops, and when they had finished, Gemma stood up.
“Come along, then,” she said leading the way upstairs. She showed him into her freshly painted bedroom. “What do you think?” She stepped back to let Tom see her work.
“It looks great,” Tom said. “The floorboards okay?” he asked. “No further problems with that window?”
“All fine, thanks.”
“You’re doing a grand job in here,” Tom said. “I look forward to being back here.”
“So do I,” she said, without meaning to say it out loud.
Chapter 9
Alice
October 1916
Alice walked into the ward to see Mary administering to the captain. Worried something must be wrong, she hurried over to check.
He was lying on his front grimacing, as Mary dabbed antiseptic soaked cotton wool gently onto an inflamed area. “A piece of shrapnel is embedded his buttock,” she said looking concerned.
Alice bent to take a closer look and saw that the area needed urgent attention. “You said you weren’t hurt,” she said, angry at him for lying to her. “Why would you lie about that?”
“I preferred the idea of one of the other nurses dressing my backside, Nurse le Breton,” he said without looking at her.
Alice studied Ed’s firm buttocks.
“I’ll see to the captain,” Mary said, waving her away. “You take a break. You look like you need one.”
Disgruntled at Ed’s dismissal of her, Alice did as Mary suggested and went to leave, almost being knocked over by Doctor Sullivan on his way in to the ward. He grabbed hold of her to steady her. “Apologies, Nurse Le Breton,” he said. “I trust you’re unhurt.”
“I am,” she said, smiling to reassure him. “However, I believe Captain Woodhall might be in need of your attention.”
“The captain is the reason I find myself here,” he said, leaving her standing, stunned.
She watched him go to Ed’s bed and check him. Not wishing to miss his diagnosis, Alice made herself busy tidying the beds of nearby patients. She smiled at each, but didn’t engage in conversation, all the time trying to hear what the doctor was saying.
One of the sisters called her over to the other side of the ward. “Fetch clean sheets for this patient’s bed, Nurse,” she said. Anxious for Ed, but not daring to ignore an order, she nodded, leaving immediately to do as she had been asked. Maybe if she was quick, she’d be back at the ward in time to find out whether Ed’s injury was badly infected, Alice thought hopefully.
She selected the bedding she needed from the store room and was on her way back when Matron gave her a message to give to one of the other sisters. Finally, after a slight delay, she arrived back at the ward. Alice went to the patient’s bed needing to be changed. Glancing over at Ed’s bed when sister’s attention was diverted, she noticed he was no longer there.
Trying not to fret, she finished what she was doing and asked Sister if she could take a break. Sister checked her watch, seemingly taking an age to do so. “Yes, you may.”
Alice walked out of the hut and went towards the theatre tents. Spotting Mary coming in her direction, she ran over to her. “How is he? Are they operating on him?”
Mary put her finger up to her mouth. “Shush, calm down.” She frowned at Alice. “What’s wrong with you today?”
Not in the mood for a lecture, Alice, took hold of her friend’s hand. “Will you just tell me?”
“The captain’s being operated on now.”
“He is?” She covered her mouth, taking a deep breath attempting to regain her composure.
“I’ve never seen you like this about any of the patients,” Mary said. “You’re ashen.” They walked together for a little longer.
Alice had never felt so deeply for any man, let alone a patient, and she admitted her feelings to her friend. “I don’t know what’s come over me.”
Mary stopped her and smiled. “Do you think you could be falling in love with the captain?”
Alice glared at her and continued on her way. She regretted saying anything to Mary, if she was going to begin questioning her. “Don’t be ridiculous, Mary. I’m probably tired, that’s all,” she insisted. But as she said the words she suspected it was not the case. There was something about the man that connected deep within her. It was a new, and not altogether joyful experience.
They spent their break in companionable silence, returning to the ward straight afterwards.
Sister Brown spotted them. “Nurse Jones, come with me,” she said. Alice wondered if the woman ever smiled. “Nurse Le Breton,” she added. “You are to go to the recovery tent. Doctor Sullivan wants you to sit with a patient who has just had surgery.”
Trying not to show her relief, Alice immediately left the ward. She had to concentrate on not running to the small side ward, where she found Ed, still sedated and looking very pale. She carefully lifted a nearby chair and placed it by the side of his bed before sitting and beginning her watch over him.
She didn’t hear Doctor Sullivan enter the canvas room. “The captain should be fine,” he said, his deep voice quiet. “I’ve removed the slither of wood from his muscle and giving the area a good clean. Hopefully, it should heal quickly.”
“Yes, Doctor,” she said. “How long shall I stay with him?”
“Until he regains consciousness. When you believe he has recovered enough to walk, then you may escort him back to the ward and his own bed.”
“Yes, doctor.”
She waited for the surgeon to leave before placing the back of her hand against Ed’s forehead. His temperature seemed fine, she noted with relief. She watched his broad chest rise and fall under his hospital blues as he slept. His fair hair slicked back looked darker. She wished she could lean forward and press her lips against his perfect mouth. Shocked at her thoughts, she sat up straight and glanced at the door. It’s fine, she reassured herself, no one could see into her mind.
A loud bombardment shook the ground causing the captain to stir. “It’s nothing to be worried about,” she soothed, aware that it was another explosion like this that had caused him to be lying here.
His eyes moved back and forth under his eyelids and he groaned. He was about to come around, she thought nervously hoping she hadn’t uttered any of her most private thoughts for him to hear. His eyes flickered and then opened. He stared at her for a moment before his mouth drew back into a wide smile.
“There you are, Nurse Le Breton,” he said, his deep voice croaky from sleep. He took in his surroundings. “We’re here alone?”
She nodded, happy, but shy for once.
“Good.”
Taken aback, Alice frowned. “Why?”
“I’ve been waiting to speak to you privately.”
Alice’s heart pounded. “What about?”
His hand moved, taking hold of hers. “I wanted to thank you for saving me.”
“I didn’t. You were saved by a team of medical staff. I was only doing my duty looking after you.” She wondered why she couldn’t simply take his compliment?
He raised his free hand to touch her lightly on her left cheek. “No, for saving my spirit when I thought all was lost.”
She didn’t understand what he meant. Alice frowned. “I don’t follow.”
He removed his hand from her cheek and cleared his throat. “The last letter I received from home before being injured, was from my brother.” Alice waited while he hesitated. “He informed me that he had fallen in love with my fiancée and that she was breaking off our engagement to marry him.” Shocked, Alice opened her mouth to speak but he continued. “I had suspected there were feelings between them,” Ed said. “I must admit, even I could see she was more suited to him, than to me.”
“That’s no excuse for jilting you,” Alice snapped, horrified to think of anyone treating a brave soldier in such a way, yet aware that it happened only too often.
“When I was injured and lying in No Man’s Land, it occurred to me that maybe it was meant to be.”
“However, do you mean?”
“Only that, if I was dead, then any scandal would be averted and after a reasonable time, my brother and she could be married.”
Alice stared at him, aghast. “How could you even think such a thing?” she asked trying not to show her upset, both at his words and the fact that he was in love with this unfaithful woman.
He closed his eyes briefly. “My mother will be devastated, both for me and as there’s bound to be a local scandal. She values her reputation and that of the family most highly.”
Alice thought of her own mother and how much she valued her reputation on the island. “More highly than your life?” Alice replied, regretting her haste instantly. It wasn’t his fault her mother put Alice’s feelings about marriage behind what the neighbours expected. “I’m sorry, I take that back.”
He took her hand in both of his. “This isn’t why I’m telling you,” he said, calmly. “I want you to know that I believed all was lost, that I had no reason to fight to recover.” She opened her mouth to argue, but he placed a finger on her lips. “Hush. What I’m trying to tell you, in my clumsy, feeble way, is that when I opened my eyes for the first time afterwards and saw you gazing at me, with such concern, I knew that there was still more waiting for me in this life.”
Choked by his words and that she had made a difference to him fighting to survive, Alice took a deep breath.
“You gave me hope. I consider you to be my very own angel.”
It was a strange thing for him to say and Alice wondered if it had something to do with him still being under the effects of the anaesthetic.
Before she could say anything, the canvas door was pushed back. Doctor Sullivan entered, noisily. He glanced at her briefly and then addressed the captain. “I see you’ve come back to join us.”
Alice immediately stood, picking up the chair and turning her back on the doctor. She placed the chair in the corner of the room while the doctor was addressing Ed. Smoothing down her apron, she returned to Ed’s bedside.
“You may accompany the captain back to the ward now, Nurse.”
“Thank you, Doctor,” Ed said.
“Yes, well, next time you receive an injury, my man, be sensible and tell a member of the nursing staff. We must deal with injuries as soon as possible. Leaving them to fester does none of us any good.”
“Understood,” Ed said, looking, Alice thought, suitably chastised.
The following week, Alice was walking to her bell tent when she heard her name being called out. Turning, she saw the captain walking as quickly as he could towards her. He waved at her, wincing momentarily.
Alice didn’t miss his valiant attempt to hide his split-second show of pain, with a smile. “Slow down,” she insisted, walking in his direction. “There’s no need to rush.”
“It’s wonderful to be outside on such a glorious day,” he said looking up at the cloudless sky. He took a deep breath, savouring the clean air. “I find I can almost pretend that there isn’t a war going on nearby on days like these.”
“Me, too,” Alice admitted. “Although it’s becoming less often.”
He reached her. “Join me for a stroll?”
Alice nodded. She had intended spending her break catching up on a little reading but spending time with Ed was much more preferable.
“How are you feeling, Captain?”
“Please,” he said, gently. “As we’re alone, can’t you call me Ed?”
The subtle change in their friendship, although not entirely unexpected after his admission to her after his operation, nonetheless made Alice feel awkward. “I’m not sure.”
“We’re friends, aren’t we?” he asked his smile slipping. “At least, I’d like to think we are. I’d like to hope we could keep in touch when I’m discharged.”
Shocked, Alice stopped walking. “I was only doing my job, err, Ed.” She didn’t want to appear unkind, so added. “You shouldn’t feel that you have to thank me or keep in touch. It really isn’t necessary.”
Ed smiled. “It’s nothing to do with gratitude, I can assure you,” he smiled. “I’d like to correspond with you when I leave here. Would you mind if I did?”
She thought about it and shook her head. “Not at all.” She was so used to focusing on her work and having distanced herself from the friends she had in jersey, Alice only exchanged letters with her mother and occasionally her younger sister. “But I’m afraid we can’t correspond, it isn’t allowed.”
His smile disappeared. “I wouldn’t want to cause you trouble,” he said as they resumed their walk.
They reached the wooded area at the back of the casualty clearing station. Distant muffled gunfire interrupted her thoughts. She didn’t want to lose contact with him but was unable to think how to move forward with their friendship.
“They don’t encourage closeness between the patients and staff,” she explained. She had experienced two nurses being sent home in disgrace when they had fallen in love with patients and another with one of the surgeons and told Ed. “It’s always the woman who’s punished and sent home.”
He frowned. “That’s unfair, but it does seem to be the way of things, I’m afraid.” He bent stiffly to pick a poppy and handed it to Alice.
Embarrassed, but touched by his gesture, she took it and smiled. “Thank you,” she said, gazing at the perfect blood red petals. She’d have to place it between the pages of one of her books if she didn’t want the poppy to shed its petals by the following day. “I love poppies,” she said. “They’re my favourite flowers.”
Ed placed a hand on Alice’s right forearm. Surprised at the physical contact, she stared at him, waiting for him so speak.
He cleared his throat. “This is probably forward of me,” he took a deep breath. “Ordinarily I wouldn’t presume to address you in such a way, but these are exceptional times and our circumstances are unusual.”
Alice suspected he was worried about leaving soon. She waited for him to continue.
His hand dropped from her arm and he stared at his feet. Then, looking into her eyes, he said. “The thing is, Nurse Le Breton.”
“Please, call me Alice when we’re alone.”
With a bare hint of a smile on his lips, he said. “Alice, the name suits you.”
Aware she didn’t have long before she returning to the ward, Alice resisted the urge to hurry him.
“Well, the thing is,” he stopped and thought for a moment, before adding. “May I kiss you?”
“I beg your pardon?” Stunned, Alice stepped back. “Captain, um, Ed.” She was about to rebuff him. Then it occurred to her that now wasn’t the time to play coy. She had developed feelings for him and he would be leaving soon. Maybe forever. Alice could feel her face reddening. She couldn’t believe that she was about to give him permission to kiss her.
“I’m sorry,” he said, taking her hesitation for refusal. He turned to walk away. “I should never have asked such a thing of you. It was wrong of me. Please, forgive me.”
“Yes,” Alice whispered, unsure if he was close enough to hear her.
Ed stopped and turned to face her. “I beg your pardon?”
Alice shrugged, enjoying the new experience of flirting with a man. “You may kiss me.” When he didn’t reac
t, she glanced at her watch. “You’ll need to be quick though, my shift begins in two minutes exactly.”
For someone who’d recently had surgery, Ed took a mere second to reach her. He stopped in front of her, his lips drawing back in a smile. “I find that suddenly I’m nervous,” he said, before bending his head and kissing her.
Alice had only ever kissed one other man and that had been her ex-fiancé. That was only because she desperately hoped to find something appealing about the man her mother insisted she marry.
This was different though. Very different.
Ed took her in his arms; their kiss deepened. Alice’s legs barely held her as she lost herself in the moment. His lips pressing against hers as he held her against his hard chest, was something Alice knew she would never forget. Nor wished to.
She heard someone shouting in the distance. She pushed him away gently. “I have to go,” she said breathlessly. Giving him a brief smile, she straightened her cap and broke into a run. She daren’t look back as she raced to the ward. Try as she might, she couldn’t unscramble her thoughts. She reached the entrance and closed her eyes to gather herself.
“Are you unwell?” Mary asked, in concern. “You look all off kilter. Something happen?”
Forcing a smile, Alice shook her head. “No, of course not. I was concerned I might be late for my shift, that’s all.”
“Hmm, I’m not so sure,” Mary said tilting her head to one side.
Alice sighed. Her friend knew her a little too well to see through her denials. “Come along,” she said, hoping to distract her. “We don’t want to be late to start our shift.”
The following day Alice received a letter from her mother begging her to come home. “She says she’s unwell,” she grumbled to Mary as they rested on their beds that evening.
“Do you think she isn’t then?” Mary rubbed her eyes before lying back and closing them.
Alice wasn’t sure. “She’s used to getting her own way,” she said suspicion increasing that her mother was playing mind games to make her return to Jersey. She re-read the brief letter, trying not to fret. “She’s not averse to using emotional blackmail. I almost married a man I didn’t love because of her persistence. Coming here has given me a freedom I’ve never known before.”