Peyton knew her eyes were swollen and red from crying after he had dropped her off. She’d managed to keep it together in the limo but once she closed the doors behind her they hadn’t stopped. Even after managing some sleep, she awoke with bags and puffiness no cream would take away.
“What do you want?” She meant to sound harsh but it didn’t come out that way at all.
“To talk.”
Oh, now he wanted to talk? After he’d had his turn to freak out.
Peyton stood up and walked to the door grabbing the edge. She didn’t want to talk anymore. “Game over.” She slammed the door shut and locked it.
Silent sad tears streamed down her face as she stood staring at the white door, wanting the man behind it and not wanting him at all.
“Peyton. Please.” Colt’s strained voice managed through the door and only made her shoulders rise and fall harder. Why was he here?
“I owe you an apology like no other I have given in my life and I’m not sure where to start.”
One hand touched the cold wood door as he spoke. “My reaction to the...” He paused and Peyton slid her other hand over her belly. “I’m sorry that I yelled at you.” He couldn’t even say the word. How had she expected him to be happy about the pregnancy when he couldn’t even say the word? Elaine didn’t know her son as well as she had led on. “I’m sorry about everything I said. I didn’t mean any of it Peyton, not one word.” His apology didn’t correct what he’d already said.
Peyton was hurt. He’d promised he wouldn’t hurt her and the first opportunity he had to uphold his promise, he hurt her. She was done. Game over was very accurate. She was never setting herself up for him to hurt her again.
“There has been so much in my life that I never faced and I hid behind what everyone else thought so I wouldn’t have to face it.” Yeah, no kidding but it was no longer her problem. “That is no excuse and I understand if you can’t forgive me. I wouldn’t forgive me. I felt ambushed when you told me.”
She whipped the door open. “Ambushed?” she yelled at him.
He jumped back startled.
“Well here’s the truth for you. I’m pregnant. You’re the dad. ‘Game over’ were your words but I stand behind them. I might be crying and sad but you made me realize I don’t want this.” She pointed between them. “I never did and you know why? Because it hurts. Because I hurt you. Because you hurt me. Because we both don’t know what to do because I’m pregnant. You’re only over here because I’m pregnant, otherwise you would have walked away.” She paused. “Just walk away Colt.”
“I don’t want to walk away.” When he said it like that she didn’t want him to either.
“I don’t want you to stay.” Yes, I do! But her heart was building a wall to protect herself from him.
“Peyton.” He reached for her.
She stepped back.
She would not falter. She would not let him back in. She would not let him hurt her.
“Game over.”
Chapter Thirty-Two
Friday finally rolled around. Peyton had managed to make it through the week and the two private demonstrations they held which had done better than any of them could have imagined for their new business. In addition, she hadn’t had a melt-down.
Now it was Friday evening and their grand opening had been amazing and extended way past six for the crowds of supportive locals filling baskets of their product. Peyton had wanted to tell her sisters everything when they got home but they were all refreshed and so excited and she didn’t want to dampen their spirits with her drama. So she’d went back to ignoring it. Only this time she didn’t have Colt to distract her.
“Peyton? Peyton?” Kate stood beside Peyton excitedly forcing a glass of red wine in her hand. A little distracted but happy. She accepted and noticed all her sisters hands were occupied with the same thing.
“Today was better than we could have hoped for,” Kate said, sharing glances with all the excited sisters.
Peyton was having a hard time bringing her happiness to the surface. It was there, she felt it deep down because they had accomplished everything they’d dreamed. She had to get her priorities straight. It was strange how priorities changed and you didn’t even see it coming.
“So let’s raise our glasses and count our blessings.” Blessings?
Peyton raised her glass and as her sisters drank to the beginning of what Peyton had once thought was her lifelong dream, she set the alcohol down and didn’t even notice one of her hands touch her middle.
Standing in the soap shop around the antique desk, Peyton found it hard to believe this little room had once consumed her mind. A mind that was now so full of what her future was going to bring and trying to figure out how she was going to handle it all.
She’d thought she’d had Colt, just like he yelled at her. She’d thought since she was pregnant with his child and he wanted a family she wouldn’t have to do it alone. She was just like everyone else after him for security.
Kate sent her a look when she didn’t drink her wine.
Abby also noticed. “Have you been hanging around Colt too much?” she asked. Thankfully, Abby was right back to herself after Peyton ripped a strip out of her. Even if the words had truth behind them that was no way for Peyton to address the situation. Abby was as forgiving as she was wild. “He’s not here,” she whispered. “Take a nice big gulp to make up for lost days.”
Peyton stared at the wine. “I can’t.”
“What do you mean you can’t? Your hands not working??
“Why do you look so pale?” Kate asked.
Sydney touched Peyton’s shoulder. “Peyton are you alright?”
Unable to control her tears, and not even caring whether she did or not, the tears released from their gathering and streamed down her face causing worry from all her sisters.
“What’s wrong?” they demanded.
“I’m pregnant.” Her voice crackled and barely made it past her trembling lips.
Sydney wrapped her arms around her shoulders and squeezed her for a long time slightly rocking her with a motherly comfort. Motherly comfort. How did Sydney know when to do it? Peyton didn’t have that gene in her. She was going to be a terrible mother. When her sobs seemed to slow and her breathing calmed, Sydney let her go.
Abby’s smarts were gone right across her face and she looked a lot like Peyton felt, lost and confused.
Standing beside Abby, Kate wore no look of confusion and also sent Peyton a motherly, comforting smile. Again, where would Peyton find hers?
“Do you want to talk about it?” Kate asked gently.
Peyton shrugged.
“How far along are you?” Her smile was so comforting. Kate was asking the easy questions before Peyton broke down and explained the reasons behind her tears.
Abby handed her a box of Kleenex.
“Since me and Colt and the shower in January.” Might as well kill two birds with one stone because that question was on its way and they already suspected the baby belonged to Colt.
They didn’t share the knowing looks she assumed they would. Kate’s her eyes only focused on her mess of a sister.
“I’m sorry you guys,” Peyton said, taking a deep breath and wiping the tears off her face. “I’m ruining your celebration.”
“It’s our celebration,” Sydney said softly. “And if your heart is sad we would much rather sit around and sulk with you.”
Peyton chuckled under a sniffle. “I’m a mess. I’ve been a miss since the day Mom died and I haven’t been able to get it together. I didn’t help Kate raise the twins. I didn’t help with money, or cooking or cleaning or school...nothing. I was a mess and now look at me.” She waved her hands at her no doubt puffy red mess of a face. “How am I going to be a good mom? How am I going to even be just a mom and give the baby everything Mom and Kate gave us? And everything Sydney gave Haylee? It’s not me. I’m not a mom.”
Everyone was quiet. They all knew it was the truth. They didn�
�t know what to say besides, Yes Peyton, you’re a mess and this baby is in for the ride of its life.
Kate braved the first words. “When we were young, most nights, when my day was so busy and I was finishing up the supper dishes and didn’t think I could take another step, but I knew the twins needed baths before bed. I would climb those stairs, that felt like the walkway to death, and find them bathed, changed into pajamas, and with brushed teeth sleeping on each side of you with a slew of children’s books across the bed.”
Peyton blew her nose. It was nice of her sister to try and find her mommy genes. “That was playing Kate.”
Kate smiled a sisterly smile that was breaking down her reservations. “It’s not always a chore being a mother Peyton.” Kate had taken on a lot of chores. “You walked them to school almost every day when I had to go find Dad because he didn’t come home the night before.”
“I was going that way anyway.”
“And when I had to go find Dad in the middle of the night, and the twins woke up crying out for mom, you climbed into their tiny little twin beds and soothed them back to sleep.”
“You did,” Abby said. “I remember. When we woke up early and Kate was still sleeping, you would take us downstairs for a special tent breakfast under the kitchen table. I loved tent breakfast.” Peyton loved tent breakfast. A tiny smile crossed her face. It was that quiet time when just the three of them shared breakfast and made up crazy stories.
“Don’t you see,” Sydney said. “Motherhood is caring, supporting, loving and taking care of your family. You’ve always been a part of that. It’s in you.”
Peyton took a moment to herself to sort out all of what her sisters were saying and they quietly let her. She had done all of those things and they had come naturally to her because she loved them. She had never considered what they meant because that was just her life, her way, her feelings.
“Your cooking needs improving,” Abby stated and Kate nudged her side sending her a shake of the head. “Too soon?”
Kate nodded.
Peyton smiled. “I suck at cooking.”
“But you’ve mastered cleaning and laundry,” Kate pointed out. “I couldn’t get you to pick up your pants let alone wash them the whole time you lived at home.”
Peyton smiled again.
“And I will teach you to make baby food,” Sydney said. “You blend smoothies like no other and it’s just as easy.”
“Thanks.”
Sydney hugged her again. “We love you Peyton.”
Kate and Abby quickly came around for a huge family bear hug that lasted forever.
“Did you tell Colt?” Abby asked.
Sydney and Kate shot Abby a hush look but then their eyes found hers with curiosity.
Peyton nodded and told them about how he whisked her away to the city in a limo after an explosive amazing early morning bath bomb creation and a night of I love you confessions. She told them about how they were treated like royalty in the restaurant and then escorted to private balcony seats at the theater. Their gazes were lost with Peyton as they relived the wonderful night leading up to the moment she made the announcement.
“I told him I was pregnant in the limo while we were still in the city and on our way to the hotel. But before I told him I asked him what he wanted, you know like a family, kids, a wife. I was scared and I needed to make sure he wanted those things after Lauren. When I told him he was in the middle of enjoying the feel of my red dress and he just lost it.” She still couldn’t get the betrayal in his eyes out of her mind. “He wouldn’t talk to me, and demanded the driver pull over. He climbed out and, when I followed. He was yelling at me, accusing me of being just like everyone else, trapping him into a life with me. Then he said ‘game over’ and I knew.”
“Game over?” Kate asked. “Game over? What does that mean?”
“It means he didn’t want us.”
“I don’t believe that,” Kate said.
It didn’t matter, Peyton’s decision was made and Colt was respecting it. “I don’t want him,” Peyton said.
“Peyton, couples fight. Couples don’t always see eye to eye,” Kate was saying.
Peyton touched her hand. “Kate, I love him. He loves me. He’s been hurt and I’ve been hurt. We are not good together. We hurt each other.”
Peyton looked around at her sisters who were all frowning. She had turned their day of joy into sadness. She was solely responsible and felt guilty for burdening them, even if it felt like her shoulders were a little less heavy now that she’d talked about Colt. About the baby. She was going to be a good mom and she knew for certain that Colt was going to a good dad. This baby would have loving parents, they just wouldn’t love each other.
“Let’s talk about something else,” she suggested with a smile.
“Dad and Elaine’s news?” Abby asked slowly, waiting for the reaction of her sisters. Cautious Abby...that was unusual.
Their father had announced the exciting news only a few days ago, while Peyton had been trying to mend her broken heart. Not only had he proposed to Elaine, but they had decided to get married in two weeks. Two weeks! Peyton should be thankful. The little bump in her stomach would still be little when they tied the knot and family pictures were taken. However there would be no avoiding Colt. When the rehearsal dinner and wedding came around, she was going to have to face him.
Peyton smiled around her sister. “So, what are we wearing to Dad’s wedding?” she asked.
Peyton was happy for both of them...she had been happier before Colt and his ‘game over’ destroyed their relationship. But, like the first day Peyton had discovered Elaine and Kent were dating, Peyton was trying hard again not to punish their relationship because her and Colt’s had failed. Elaine was going to be a part of Peyton’s life now marrying her dad and the future grandmother of the baby, so Peyton wanted their day to be about them and not clouded with Colt and Peyton’s drama.
A look travelled around her sister’s faces as they put together Elaine and Dad’s wedding when her and Colt were in the middle of whatever it was they were in the middle of and this was exactly what she didn’t want to happen
“Guys, stop it. Don’t drag me and Colt into Dad and Elaine’s wedding. Elaine said we could dress in whatever we pleased, but I thought we could all go together and coordinate with her colors.”
They stood quiet.
“Grey?” Peyton suggested.
“I like grey,” Abby said. She would it was the next color to black.
Chapter Thirty-Three
Two weeks later, Peyton drove Abby and Sydney to a gorgeous Tuscan-inspired waterfront mansion located on the cliff where Kent and Elaine would be sharing their wedding vows the following day. There were a lot of rentals in Willow Valley as it was a vacation town and saying their vows overlooking the lake on a gorgeous March afternoon sounded beautiful. They had chosen Sunday for their small wedding when the shop was closed.
“Holy cow!” Abby said climbing out of the vehicle. “How in the hell did Dad afford to rent this for the weekend?” Abby pulled her leather jacket together against the wild wind. It didn’t suit the long black dress she was wearing for the rehearsal dinner, but the woman couldn’t seem to part with her leather and studs.
Peyton suspected Colt’s wallet came into action to help pay for the rental.
“It’s so beautiful.” Sydney said. She was wearing a vintage style lace cream dress that fell just above her knees. “This is going to be so romantic.” She eyed the large pillars between the slate stairs.
Peyton saw Marc and Kate’s Escalade already parked beside her dad’s truck and Colt’s truck.
Colt. He was in there. Of course he is here.
She hadn’t talked to him since the night at her house. He left her alone just like she’d asked. Why then did she feel sad? Because I miss him. Because I love him.
The front doors opened and a gentleman, who introduced himself as Johnathan, welcomed them in, taking their jackets and bags.
/>
Peyton stared around the foyer in awe. So this was what the houses on the cliff looked like inside. If they thought the outside was incredible it didn’t compare to the beauty inside.
The marble floor stretched the distance to the double-high library on the left and the incredible dining room to the right with a carved table that would sit twelve people easily. The posh white carpet swept up the double winding staircase like a wave from the water and led to the second floor overlooking the room behind where the wedding bustle seemed to be.
Johnathan ushered them between two large cast urns with cascading flowers at the bottom of the staircase.
Peyton felt a hand wrap around hers and knew it was Colt before she even turned to face the handsomeness that was always him. He coordinated with this luxury home wearing a designer, no doubt expensive grey suit that fit every angle of him perfectly. That suit would look amazing coupled with the off the shoulder grey gown she had chosen for the wedding the following day. Today she wore a mid-length black dress that flowed from under her breasts, purposely chosen to hide the tiny bulge the baby was creating in her middle.
“Can I show you something?” he asked keeping her behind as the rest met Elaine and Kent’s embraces.
Peyton hadn’t seen him in weeks and she missed his touch and the way his eyes looked only at her.
Peyton nodded, entranced by this man. It could also be her stupid hormones. They seemed to decide everything for her lately. When she would cry, when she would smile, when she would eat, what she would eat...it was disruptive.
Colt headed toward the white posh staircase and she resisted. “Let me take my shoes off.”
“It’s okay.” He didn’t slow his step.
“Colt.”
Her heels hit the white soft carpet and she was horrified. This wasn’t their house. Although she knew Colt could pay the bill to replace the carpet in the entire house. That wasn’t the point.
At the top of the stairs a wooden railing opened to the amazing living room encased in windows overlooking the cliff that had wooden staircases leading down to the lake. It would be amazing to wake up each summer morning and walk down to the lake with a mug of coffee and enjoy the tranquility it offered.
Lakeshore Legend: The McAdams Series (By The Lake Series Book 2) Page 23