by Lucy Monroe
She had loved being a grandmother, no matter what she had thought of her daughter for catching pregnant with no husband in sight.
Ciara’s face was filled with compassion. “She hurt you very much with her disapproval.”
“I am sure Mother thought she was doing right, protecting me from myself and tendencies she thought were damaging.”
“She was wrong.”
Shona almost smiled. Even Audrey had never stated it so baldly before. “Mother wanted what was best for me.”
“Her love was best for you. Withholding it could not alter your course or the woman you had become.”
“With that attitude, you will make a fine mother yourself one day.” It was one Shona shared.
God willing, her children would never doubt her great love for them.
“Thank you.” Ciara beamed. “For your insight and your affirmation.”
The celi di left then, to rejoin her husband. The blinding grin that overtook the man’s intimidating features moments later would imply that Ciara had shared Shona’s belief that they would indeed one day parent children they would call their own.
“You are a very special woman,” Caelis said from beside her as his great warhorse nuzzled her mare.
She turned and smiled at him and Eadan, who was riding for this part of the journey in his da’s lap. “I am pleased you think so.”
Eadan grinned back proudly, clearly thrilled to be where he was.
“I am not the only one. Thomas and Audrey sing your praises; even the Lady Abigail is as protective of you as one of her own.”
The words were gratifying, but they brought up another worry Shona had been doing her best to ignore.
“Will Thomas stay with the Sinclairs when we leave?” she asked, her heart twinging at the idea.
Caelis shook his head, the depths of his gentian gaze telling her without words he understood her feelings. “I offered to complete his training and he has accepted. He will wear MacLeod colors.”
Emotion clogged Shona’s throat, but she forced out a heartfelt, “Thank you.”
Caelis had made no secret of the fact he did not like Shona’s closeness to the young Chrechte, but he had still taken care that she would not lose Thomas from her life.
His next words confirmed Caelis’s understanding of the matter. “He is important to you.”
“As if he were my own brother.”
“You have a big heart, Shona.”
“For a long time, I tried very hard not to acknowledge my heart at all.”
“I do not think you were ever successful.”
Looking back at the way she’d accepted Audrey and Thomas into her affections as well as the love she had for her children, which grew daily, Shona thought he might be right.
But she had tried.
“I never loved the baron.”
“How could you? Your heart was full of me. Besides, he was a bastard.”
The baron had been neither kind nor considerate, but he could have been much worse and so both her parents took pains to remind her on any occasion they deemed it necessary.
“I refused to even speak your name aloud.”
“But you never forgot me, just as I never forgot you.”
“Even when Uven had convinced you of my death?”
“Even then. I did not try to make love to another woman even then. I would have known you lived if I had done.”
She was sorry for the pain of loss he’d suffered, but couldn’t regret he’d never been tempted by another woman. Even if he did not love her as she loved him—and she was not as certain of that fact as she’d once been—she was definitely his mate.
The only woman he wanted. The only woman he needed physically.
And that was pretty special, as he’d said, even if that was not exactly precisely what he had meant.
* * *
The mating ceremony was beautiful beyond imagination and yet more natural than any wedding Shona had ever attended.
It took place deep in the caves the Chrechte had named sacred, in a chamber redolent with the power of millennia’s worth of spiritual ceremonies for the Chrechte. The chamber glowed with an inexplicable light emanating from the walls. The Clach Gealach Gra on the stone pedestal in the center burned brightly like it was lit from within by a flame so hot it burned white.
The light shimmered red as Prince Eirik led Vegar and Audrey to lay their hands on it and in speaking vows to one another in the ancient language of the Chrechte.
Shona did not understand, but Caelis translated the vows for her via their mating bond. The mutual promises of lifelong care, protection, respect, fidelity and honor brought tears to her eyes even as she imagined repeating them with Caelis.
They uttered their last vows and then a profound silence fell over the cave, the air so still Shona could hear her own heartbeat in her ears.
The stone glowed a deep, dark red like a blood ruby and both Vegar and Audrey released a simultaneous breath before looking at one another with a connection so strong, Shona could feel its power from where she stood.
“Your heart is pure,” Vegar pronounced of his mate.
Audrey dipped her head. “It is yours.”
It should have been too soon for such declarations, but Shona was certain she was not the only witness there who felt the absolute sincerity of their words.
“I will treasure that gift always,” Vegar replied in a tone every bit as solemn.
Ciara stepped forward, another stone held aloft in her hands, this one glowing like a dark, translucent emerald. She invited Vegar and Audrey to lay hands on it as well before speaking a blessing over their union, which once again Caelis interpreted for Shona inside her head.
The blessing had the sound of a prophecy and Shona stored her joy for her friend in her heart.
The green light seemed to reach out and surround the mated couple and the Faol’s celi di, swirling around all three of them like a glowing mist.
Shona felt drawn to the stone, the urge to touch it so strong, her hand lifted toward them before she forced it back to her side. With great effort, she held herself back, careful to keep thoughts of how much she wanted to touch it far from the forefront of her mind. She did not understand this need, but she would not give in and mar her friend’s special moment.
Chapter 22
The gifts of the sacred stone require sacrifice on the part of the one blessed by them, but destiny cannot be denied.
—CIARA OF THE SINCLAIR
Prince Eirik pronounced Vegar and Audrey lifetime mates, responsible first and foremost to the sacred bond between them.
A great cheer went up, echoing off the stone walls of the cave, resounding with both triumph and happiness.
As a child, Shona had witnessed a wedding in her clan that received the same joyful response. She remembered thinking one day she would marry her warrior and the whole clan would rejoice. Even then, the only groom her mind could conjure was the young boy Caelis, only a few years older but a world ahead by a child’s standards.
Laird Sinclair stepped forward, a black fur over his forearm, and offered it to Vegar. “For your mating.”
Caelis moved away from Shona and only then did she realize he also had something in his hands. “That your mating may begin as it will continue, acknowledged by me and all Chrechte among the MacLeod.” Her mate offered Vegar and Audrey plaids in the colors of the MacLeod.
The other soldiers wearing those colors came forward, all dropping to a single knee and placing their right fists over their hearts.
“We will protect your mating and mate with our lives as is right among our kind,” Caelis said in tones far more like his conriocht than the man.
“Aye,” the kneeling soldiers said as one.
Emotion overwhelmed Shona, but she had her own gift to offer. She approached the newly mated couple and offered the silver hairbrush she’d brought among the few belongings she’d deemed absolutely necessary when she had fled the barony. “May you both find
joy in your service to one another.”
Vegar accepted the hairbrush, the tender glance he gave Audrey saying he knew exactly who was supposed to be offering the act of service. Then she handed Audrey a satchel filled with herbs and remedies. “May you care for your husband and children to come, healing scrapes as well as hearts.”
Audrey’s eyes overflowed with tears. “You prepared for this, even though you could not know…”
“I knew the sister of my heart would one day take a husband and that I would be prepared to show my good wishes for that joining.”
Audrey embraced Shona, a soft sob sounding in her ear. They hugged for long moments before Shona stepped back and Thomas took her place. He offered his sister and the man by her side a butter-soft skin to cover their mating bed.
When she saw it, Audrey again started to weep, but Vegar simply muttered a heartfelt thank-you.
Afterward, everyone stayed in the chamber for the Sinclair’s youngest child’s welcome-to-life ceremony. The green stone glowed again, enveloping the child bringing forth gurgles and joy-filled baby laughter before fading.
Caelis and the other MacLeod soldiers accompanied the mated couple out of the cave. Minutes later, the howls of several wolves echoed along the underground passageways.
Caelis returned to Shona and the children shortly thereafter, looking exactly as he had upon leaving. She’d no notion if he had shifted or not.
“Part of the mating ritual?” she asked.
“For the Faol, yes.”
And Audrey was Faol, though her English friend had little true notion what that meant.
Shona merely nodded in acknowledgment, not certain she wanted details, as she would be facing her own mating ceremony at some point in the future.
* * *
The trip to Balmoral Island was uneventful, if Caelis could ignore the soppy looks passing between his fellow Cahir and the man’s new mate.
Who knew Vegar even had that particular expression in his repertoire?
And the former Englishwoman spent as much time riding in Vegar’s lap as she did in her own saddle.
For some reason, both Caelis’s children found this vastly amusing and their giggles echoed through the forest as the horses galloped toward the sea.
Their party made it to shore where the boats were kept in a cave by the Sinclairs faster than he would have expected traveling with children and a newly mated pair. The sea crossing itself went quickly, with the four robust warriors to man the oars. The three women entertained and watched over Marjory and Eadan, making sure Caelis’s son especially did not go tipping over the side of the boat into the waters.
Eadan had a sense of adventure untempered by caution that made Caelis both proud and terrified at the same time.
The boy showed no more fear of the sheer drop down the unprotected side of the switchback trail they had to climb to reach the Balmoral keep than he did riding a flat forest trail, either. Caelis breathed a strong sigh of relief when they reached the top and headed toward the imposing castle on the cliff overlooking the sea.
Shona laughed a little and he turned to her. “What amuses you?”
“When I first saw the Sinclair’s keep, I had the wish but little hope that the Balmoral’s would be as well fortified and imposing.”
“It is near impenetrable.”
“I can see that. My family here, if they had a mind to, could protect Eadan from Percival’s evil intents with little effort.”
“He has no need of their protection. He has mine.” Was that still in doubt in her mind?
Shona smiled up at Caelis, her lovely green eyes sparkling with the love she’d admitted to. “I know, but surely you can see the irony?”
“I do.” Though he did not like the fact she was still thinking of others protecting their son.
“I’m not,” she said, exasperation twisting her smile.
“I said nothing.”
“Did you not?” she asked, her eyes saying otherwise.
But he truly had not. He had not thought his feelings aloud, either. He was sure of it. He had never heard of mindspeak being so much like mind reading before. The latter being a myth parents told their children about in stories before bedtime.
Their traveling party was stopped and questioned at the gate, but let through because they were with Prince Eirik. Nevertheless, a small contingent of Chrechte soldiers accompanied them to the keep and did not leave them until dismissed by the Balmoral.
Caelis had no doubts the man would be able to point them in the direction of Shona’s family. Lachlan knew his clan from the oldest Chrechte to the youngest human infant, by sight and by name. The laird not only participated in training all the soldiers, Chrechte and human alike, he spent time training with the Cahir each sennight as well.
His wife, the Lady Emily, took a personal interest in all the families of the clan, no matter their origins and encouraged friendships between her children and those of the kitchen staff as much as the highest-ranking warriors.
Moments after explaining their quest to find Shona’s remaining blood relatives here on Balmoral Island Caelis was speechless from the knowledge imparted by Lachlan.
Shona was not so affected. “You are my cousin?” she asked the laird, her eyes shining with delighted interest. “How can this be?”
She was no doubt thrilled to discover her familial connection to the one of the most powerful Chrechte lairds in the Highlands.
“His mother was human,” Emily, the laird’s wife, offered. “It is not nearly as difficult as you might imagine.”
The Balmoral smiled indulgently at his wife, but shook his head.
“Actually, my great-aunt who left our island to join her mate among the MacLeod was Chrechte. She was sister to my father’s mother.”
Lachlan looked at Shona expectantly. She stared back, uncomprehending.
“You are saying her grandmother was Faol?” Caelis asked his voice near faint with shock.
The Balmoral laird nodded. “Aye.”
“But I’m human!”
“Those of mixed parentage are as likely to be born human as Chrechte,” Lady Emily offered with an interesting look for her husband.
“But my father was human.”
“He was,” Caelis affirmed. He would have been able to tell otherwise; it would have been revealed in the man’s scent.
Lachlan shrugged, apparently unconcerned by the fact his cousin had been human. “His mother was Faol.”
But then, Lachlan’s own brother had been human, with no wolf to share his nature. By all accounts, their father’s reaction to his firstborn being unable to shift had caused resentment and eventually Ulf’s death.
’Twas a sobering lesson not to be dismissed by a man with one Faol and one human child already.
“That explains Uven’s predecessor appointing my da as seneschal.” Shona sighed, the sound filled with weary pain. “My father never told me. Anything.”
The fresh betrayal in her voice sliced at Caelis’s heart.
Lachlan nodded as if he understood. “He was raised in a clan where the Fearghall had a deep stronghold. No doubt he believed he was protecting you.”
“Perhaps he was taught, like we were, that to reveal the true nature of the Chrechte meant death?” Audrey offered, her concern for her friend apparent.
Clearly accepting neither explanation, Shona looked up at Caelis, her expression filled with pained helplessness. “Why?”
Ignoring the others around them, he turned to face her, cupping her cheeks, wishing he had an answer that could take away the pain. “I dinna ken, but this I know: it was not your doing. The lack was in your da, not you.”
“I loved my parents. So much.”
“They loved you, too.” Neither had been effusive in their affections, but in their years among the clan, they’d shown the high esteem they held their only offspring in.
“It does not feel like it.”
She had too many fresh memories to supplant the ones from her
childhood, when she would have been certain of their love and care. And maybe that explained how sure she was that Caelis did not love her.
“They made mistakes, but they did not stop loving you.”
“My father had to know how horrible my marriage would be for me and yet he pushed me into it.”
Because her father would have known that Shona was true mated to Caelis or she could not have conceived his child. Caelis himself did not understand why the man had not returned to the clan to tell him of his child.
Shona’s father must have known that Caelis would have claimed his true mate pregnant with his babe, no matter what his laird had dictated.
Instead, the former seneschal of his clan had forced his daughter into a marriage he had to know would be difficult, if not impossible, for her.
Only because she was more human than Chrechte had her body allowed penetration by the baron. Caelis could be grateful for that, because had her body responded like a Chrechte’s, Shona would have been subjected to even more pain.
He was certain of it. The dead baron had been a lecher and a cur.
“He thought you were fully human,” Caelis said to Shona now, knowing it would be little comfort.
“I’m not.”
Caelis would not gainsay her on that claim. There was too much to support her supposition, though he’d never heard of a non-shifting Chrechte exhibiting other traits of their race.
It bothered him that he could not tell what Shona thought about the fact she was part Faol, but there could be no denying it either. Her reaction to her marriage to the baron was far more Chrechte than human and the strange way Caelis and Shona sometimes read each other’s minds could well come from latent Chrechte gifts.
“You do not have a wolf.” Of that he was certain.
Her eyes sparked with unexpected mischief. “I thought you said that you were mine as much as I am yours.”
Relief flooded Caelis. If she could tease, she was not too devastated.
He would never again allow himself to be surprised by the depths of his mate’s strength.