by Joanne Rock
“Sam and I have talked about that summer. I hope you don’t mind, but he told me what happened to you, Gabby.” The old nickname rolled off her lips without thought, but the conversation had definitely ventured into highly personal terrain. “What happened wasn’t your fault. You can’t feel guilty about something that you didn’t do.”
Listen to her. Doctor, heal thyself, right?
She’d been giving herself the same pep talk for years.
“But I don’t—” The other woman cut herself off. Straightened. “You’re right. I know you’re right. I’ve dealt with a lot of the facets of what happened that summer—my father went to jail, I tried to kill myself, I got attacked, we ran away...” She shook her head. “It was all such huge stuff, and I’ve battled it. But now it’s the smaller things that come back to bite me. Like the fact that I took your guy out of town and I really freaked anytime him or Zach mentioned calling anyone from home.”
“You were scared.” Amy poured sugar in her coffee and passed the plastic container to Gabriella, surprised how much easier it was to talk to her about huge life-and-death events than it was to talk to regular people about little things. But Gabby was a survivor, like her. She understood how that felt. “Sometimes being scared is what keeps you safe. And that’s not a bad thing.”
“Yes. Yes. And hell yes.” Gabby added sugar to her own drink and stirred.
“Can I ask you a personal question?” Amy tipped her head sideways to reassess the delicate blonde, seeing the strength beneath that pretty exterior.
“Anything. You made a weird and difficult confession easy on me, so I owe you a freebie.” She lifted her mug to her lips, her stack of bangles tinkling.
“Who were you trying to forget about when you talked yourself into a crush on Sam?” She was curious. They’d gone to school together. Maybe she knew the guy.
“He hadn’t lived here long when I left, so maybe you wouldn’t remember the boy who moved into the Hasting house after Sam. Clayton Travers?”
Amy’s mug slipped in her grip, sloshing coffee forward before she got a better hold on it.
“Has Zach mentioned to you Clayton is in town?” Amy tried to remember what Sam had told her about him.
Gabriella’s expression froze. She looked like a photo image of herself, unmoving.
“Gabby? He’s not a bad guy, is he? He’s working for your brother, at least until the trial. Zach hired him to be my sister Heather’s bodyguard.” Amy hadn’t met him, but Heather liked him well enough. “He’s a PI in Memphis, but he came back for a reunion of the Hasting foster kids.”
“Clayton?” Gabriella’s voice sounded off. “Travers?”
Okay, then. Definitely a past there.
“Yes. I’m surprised Zach didn’t mention it to you.”
“I haven’t spoken to him in a few days. I was out of town for that seminar, and then I decided to fly straight here for the trial.” She stood, seeming to forget all about her coffee.
Amy rose, too, but before she could try to convince Gabby to sit back down, a flash of metallic black paint passed her front window, and the shadow of a big pickup truck slid by.
Sam was here.
“I’ve got to go, Amy.” Gabriella picked up her sweater. “I’m so sorry to leave awkwardly. I just— I need to go.”
She darted out so fast, she barely acknowledged Sam in the driveway. Amy’s heart was racing now for completely different reasons anyhow. What was Sam doing here?
She couldn’t seem to pull her eyes off him as he stepped out of the truck and said hello to Gabby.
Struggling to catch her breath, Amy ran nervous fingers over her hair. She’d expected him to be busy with work while she finished up on the house and quietly left town. But the way his stormy gray eyes zeroed in on her, she had the feeling he wasn’t here for any quiet goodbyes. There was a tense set to his shoulders. A determined jut of his chin.
And, yes, she could read the man that well, a skill she had probably developed long ago because he simply didn’t say much. He expressed himself in other ways. Like now, when he wore that fearsome expression.
What on earth had set him off this morning?
“I wasn’t expecting you.” She folded her arms across her chest to ward off the morning chill as she stood in the doorway.
“And I sure as hell wasn’t expecting you to turn tail and disappear right out from under my nose. Not after everything that’s happened between us.” He didn’t stop until he stood a hand’s span from her, so close she could feel the heat of his frustration and his raw, masculine appeal. So close she could almost forget her nobler instincts that told her he deserved a chance to be a real family with Aiden and Cynthia.
“I wasn’t going to disappear.” She fought the urge to touch him. Or to step back so she didn’t touch him. Either option would send the wrong message and reveal how very much he affected her.
“Can you deny you’re leaving town again?” His hands seemed just as restless as hers when he rapped the back of his knuckles against a porch post in a quick, anxious rhythm.
“I never planned to stay.” It was the truth, although she might have entertained the thought briefly after she’d spent the night with Sam. So many things in her life had started coming together—her relationship with her mother, her siblings...herself. “I have a life in Atlanta.”
“Oh? Tell me about it.” He sidestepped her to sit on the porch swing, keeping his feet planted on the plank flooring, his elbows on his knees. “I want to hear about this life in Atlanta that you want to return to so damn badly that you moved up the time frame of your renovation project just to get out of here faster.”
Ah. That explained why he was on edge. He must have heard something from the woman who worked in the permit office. No surprise in a small town.
“I have my own business. Doing accounting for people. Some consulting. Some tax preparation. Whatever it takes to stay afloat.” She shifted to stand near the porch post farthest from him, needing that distance to keep perspective. To prevent herself from throwing herself at him and losing herself in the chemistry that had always sparked between them.
“A job you could do anywhere, if you chose to.” He templed his fingers together, never taking his eyes off her as she moved.
“I guess. Although Atlanta is a bigger city where I could hopefully find more clients.”
Though suddenly she didn’t want to return to her tiny apartment, where she’d scrimped and saved every penny for years.
She’d been too proud to ask her family for any kind of support, needing to prove to herself she could be strong. Independent. She actually had solid savings and a few good clients. Plus the profit from her share of the cabin would help her expand the business. She’d planned it all carefully.
“Maybe, but a bigger city means far more competition,” he pointed out, as if this conversation would have any bearing on what she chose to do with her future. “Here, the Finley name is trusted, respected and well-known.”
“True.” But it didn’t matter that he made reasonable arguments. Or that he was the best thing that had ever happened to her. That she loved him and wanted to be with him.
She loved him too much to think about herself.
“Your family has missed you, Amy. I’ve missed you.” The sincerity in his voice was reflected in his eyes.
He was a man of few words, but she knew he meant what he said.
Her throat tightened up.
“It’s been really good seeing you again.” She owed him that much, didn’t she? She couldn’t just pretend this time with him hadn’t affected her, even if she was still going to leave.
“So why the rush to go?” He rose to his feet again, stalking across the planks toward her, not stopping until he was close enough to touch her.
And he did.
His hands cupped her elbows, and his fingers gently stroked the backs of her upper arms through the heavy knit of the long sweater she wore over leggings.
“I know you think there’s nothing left between you and Cynthia. But you share Aiden, and he’s the most important thing in your life. You told me yourself that no one can take a mother’s place.” He’d always said how important family was to him as a foster child. “The two of you will share that bond for a lifetime. And I won’t ruin your chance of having the family you always wanted.”
His hands stilled, but he didn’t move away.
“You weren’t going to ask me about the family I always wanted? You just decided who belonged in it and who didn’t?” His eyes searched hers.
“She’s the mother of your son.” She stepped back, unable to think when he touched her and looked at her like that. “That gives her a pretty strong claim. You said you didn’t want Aiden to go through the pain that you did, losing a mother.”
“She will always be his mother, Amy. But I still get to choose who I want in my family. You should know that blood doesn’t dictate that for me.” He didn’t move to follow her, allowing her to pace the small porch, dodging a roll of leftover insulation from the roofing project earlier in the week. “Lorelei is the only woman I’ll ever call my mother. That’s a bond we chose, not one biology pinned on us.”
“I understand. But I know how it feels to be shut out of your world.” She’d been so hurt when Sam had left town ten years ago. She’d been adrift for years, and it had owed as much to his defection as any rift with her family or even that awful night in the woods. “I remember how awful it was to be on the outside looking in, powerless to have a relationship with you. I don’t want to do that with her when she loves Aiden and maybe she could love you, too.”
She wrapped her arms around her midsection, suddenly unbearably chilled. A breeze ruffled her hair, sending strands across her cheek and neck to tickle her skin.
“But I’m in love with you.”
Even without his hands on her, the words cracked through her defenses to touch the softest, most vulnerable part of her.
Because Sam Reyes was not the kind of man who said things lightly.
She forgot all about the cold.
“Sam.” She couldn’t breathe. “I never thought— That is, I didn’t—” Stopping herself, she wasn’t even sure what to say. She hadn’t counted on this.
“You can’t deny that being back together... It’s as if we were never apart. That day we went to the bridge and you came back to my house, those hours made me happier than I’ve been in a long time.” He stepped close so he was toe to toe with her again, bringing all that strength and raw male appeal with him. “And that was all while I was wrapped up in a huge case. Can you imagine what our days might be like when the only crime I’m stopping is public nudity from teenage skinny-dippers?”
A surprise laugh escaped her even as her heart urged her to accept what he was suggesting. “We might have been the only kids crazy enough to try that.”
“Let’s find a little of that crazy again and take a chance on each other. On a future. I want you in my life, Amy, however I can have you. You leaving isn’t going to change that.” He did touch her then, his hand sifting through her hair to curl a strand around one finger.
“I do love you, Sam.” She had kept enough secrets to last a lifetime. This was one truth she needed to share. “So much. I want you in my life, too. But while I’m getting closer to being ready to testify, I’m not sure I’m quite there yet. Can you ever understand that?”
His arm snaked around her waist, his lips brushing hers as his breath warmed her mouth. “Yesterday made a lot of things clear to me, Amy. And one of those was that things aren’t always black-and-white. I’ll support you whatever decision you make.”
He drew her body to his, fitting her curves to his hard planes in a way that made her light-headed.
Almost as much as his words did.
“I want all the things you talked about. A life here. With you and Aiden.” She confessed the deepest needs of her heart, knowing they would be safe with him.
She didn’t have to give him up so he could have a family. He wanted her for his family.
“I believe I can make you happy here. But if you want to move—”
“I’m excited to be a real Finley again. Family first.”
“Except I’m going to work on making you a Reyes.” He kissed her so softly her toes curled inside her boots, her whole body responding.
“Remember when we first met?” Opening her eyes, she looked into the ones she wanted to see for the rest of her life.
“The teacher asked us to carry the archery boards.” His lips found a vulnerable spot on her neck, and she had to wrap her arms around him to keep from melting at his feet.
“And I told you not to bother helping me because I could manage on my own?” She’d tell that story to Aiden one day when he was old enough to have his first girlfriend.
“So surly when I’m not kissing you.” He swept aside her hair to nip her ear.
“I’m glad you didn’t listen.” She cradled his face in her hands, hardly believing her path had brought her back here, to this man.
The one who’d been so right for her all along.
“Just because you can manage on your own doesn’t mean you should.” He lifted her up in his arms, sliding her body against his as he tugged her off her feet to kiss her thoroughly. “I don’t suppose you have any of the bedrooms finished inside this place?”
He paused to open the front door of the remodeled cabin. Warmth drifted out to envelop them along with the scent of sawdust and pine.
“There is one.” Now that she didn’t have to move up the renovation, she had hours to love this man.
“Good.” He carried her across the threshold and locked the front door behind them. “I want you to show me because I’m in the market for a house. I’m tired of renting. And I have a family to think about.”
Her heart swelled at the possibility they could stay right here in this place she’d come to love deeply. “Really?”
“Only if it can feel like home to you.” He wrapped a hand around each of her thighs and levered her legs up around his waist, striding through the kitchen with her toward the new staircase. “I want a house you’ll never want to leave.”
“This is going to be perfect.” Heat flooded her skin at the intimate brush of their bodies. Her fingers worked the buttons on his shirt as he climbed the stairs to the all-new second story.
He took them sideways through the open door at the top, the one bedroom she’d set up. The bed waited at the center of an otherwise empty room, a new white duvet rumpled on top of the sheets where she’d slept for the first time the night before.
“You know what makes a house a real home?” he asked, tunneling strong hands under her sweater to caress her hips. Her waist.
“Love.” She edged back to look him in the eye.
“That’s right.” A grin lifted one side of his mouth as he lowered her to the bed. “Let’s make some.”
* * * * *
Keep reading for an excerpt from ALL I WANT by Nicole Helm.
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All I Want
by Nicole Helm
CHAPTER ONE
CHARLIE WAINWRIGHT STOOD at the entrance to his brother’s vegetable barn, phone in hand, many, many curse words in his head.
He was about to send his third where are you? text in fifteen minutes but then saw Dell’s head appear, along with a much smaller, darker head leaning against his shoulder.
“You ask for my help and now you’re late? See if I help you again,” Charlie called, keeping the curse words in his head only for his niece’s benefit.
“Mia’s not feeling great. She was going to watch Lainey even so, but the terrible twos are alive and well.” Dell approached, and Charlie had to admit the guy looked exhausted.
“She isn’t two yet.”
“Close e-da...darn-nough.” Dell handed the little girl off to Charlie and then opened up the barn.