by Erin Wright
“Well,” he started out hesitantly, “vehicles are meant to be run. Whenever you drive or start a car, the oil is moved around, re-lubricating everything, so the longer a vehicle just sits there, unused, the worse condition it ends up in. If a car sits out in a car lot for a long time, not being sold, it’ll eventually end up with ‘lot rot,’ which – you can guess just from the name – isn’t good for it.”
“Wow. I had no idea.” Her cheeks flushed red and she stared down at the hardwood floors in embarrassment. How was it that she was technically an adult and yet, there was so much she still didn’t know? If she was old enough to get knocked up, it seemed like she ought to be old enough to know the most basic of information.
Lot rot? Septic systems? Burning barrels? Was adulthood this confusing for everyone or had she missed a class somewhere on how to become a real adult?
Adam reached out and gave her a friendly hug. “Don’t feel bad!” he reassured her. “You’ve never owned a car; you can’t be expected to know every…every little thing about them.” Except the last part came out in a mere whisper as he stared down at her, tucked up against his side, and she was drowning in his whiskey brown eyes, her breath caught in her throat.
I can’t, can’t, can’t do this. I can’t fall in love with my boss/landlord/car salesman.
Absolutely, positively cannot.
Chapter 15
Adam
He was frozen, his arm around Kylie as he looked down at her. She felt it too, he could see it plain as day. She’d make the world’s worst poker player because every thought and feeling was right there on her face.
And her face was telling him that she felt the arcs of electricity between them with every strangled breath.
“Well-I-better-get-going-and-look-at-the-car-and-see-what-needs-to-be-fixed-before-you-can-buy-it-see-you-later,” and he was out the door, running as if someone had set his ass on fire and he jumped into his truck, gunning the engine and tearing down the dirt driveway like a convict making a break from prison.
He couldn’t fall in love with Kylie VanLueven. No way, no how. She was his employee, for God’s sake. And a good fifteen years younger than him. And…and…well, he was sure there were other reasons too, that he’d think of in just a moment.
Oh, like the fact that he was in a position of power over her – that was a damn good reason that he couldn’t fall in love with her. He couldn’t take advantage of her.
Yeah, she felt the sparks right now – he was plenty sure the fine folks of Franklin, 30 minutes away, felt the sparks between them – but what if that changed in the future? She could feel pressured to continue to date him even if she didn’t want to, and how despicable was that? He couldn’t stand the thought of being that guy. He wasn’t built for it.
He couldn’t shake the feeling that he was built for Kylie, though, and the idea of giving her up, no matter how “right” it was, felt like someone had landed a nice right hook to his solar plexus. It was hard to remember what life had been like a few short weeks ago – behind on bills, behind on billing, the office a mess (okay, so it was still a mess but at least it was now a clean mess), incoherent phone messages scrawled out by the world’s worst secretary, no scent of wildflowers to drive him absolutely crazy, no bright smile and cheerful attitude to cheer him up no matter what was happening…
He didn’t want to face a world without Kylie VanLueven in it.
But he also couldn’t take advantage of her youth and naïveté by dating her.
But he also, also couldn’t imagine continuing to keep his hands to himself – his self-control was rapidly disappearing every day that he spent around her.
In short, he was screwed six ways to Sunday, and he had no idea how to even begin figuring out how to save himself, or what “saving” really meant.
Chapter 16
Kylie
Kylie was nibbling on the end of her pencil, looking down her needs list, trying to think if there was anything else she needed to scour Second Time Around for, when she heard the low but insistent moo of a cow.
A cow that seemed quite unhappy with her status in the world.
Kylie shoved some Crocs on and hurried outside. Maybe the cow had gotten her head stuck in something. Maybe she needed more food and water. Actually, come to think of it, she and Adam hadn’t exactly gotten around to talking about the finer points of taking care of the animals. She’d figured they’d go over that after he helped her move in, but then he’d touched her and taken off like a rabbit with a sparkler tied to its ass, and…well, feeding instructions hadn’t exactly happened.
She let herself into the small pasture that was connected to the barn and this time, all of the animals came running at her. The hens, the rooster, Skunk, and Dumbass were all high-tailing it in her direction. She saw the heavy udders of Skunk sway with every hurried step and a lightbulb went off in her head.
Duh.
She was supposed to be milking the milk cow. And the milk goat. Herself. She hardly knew how to set up utilities in her name; barely knew what a septic tank was; only had the vaguest clue about lot rot after Adam’s quick description of it; and was now the sole person in charge of the care and upkeep of real live animals.
She was pretty sure God was laughing his ass off on some cloud up there, watching the light bulbs going off over her head. Yeah, Kylie, you are responsible for real animals who need real food and real care. Get with the program, yo.
Apparently God had a ghetto accent. Who knew!
Dumbass was busy pushing her head up against Kylie’s side with all her goat might, reminding her that Skunk wasn’t the only one that needed milking, while Skunk stood directly in front of Kylie, lowing so loudly, Kylie’s teeth were rattling from the strength of it.
Good fun.
The evening light was fading fast but Kylie figured out how to get the latch undone and open up the door to the barn. There was a general stampede of fur, feathers, and madness as all of the animals tried to thunder inside as one. Kylie jumped to the side and watched as the stream went by, finally breathing in deeply when everyone had disappeared into the shadowy depths.
“I can totally do this,” she said to the world at large, and then went inside, closing the door behind her. She patted around on the walls, searching for a light switch and finally found one, a solitary light bulb flipping on above to reveal a dusty barn with creaking rafters and walls that were nothing more than gray, weathered slats. They were covered with a generous helping of spider webs and a smattering of farm implements that Kylie could only guess had been used at the turn of the century.
The 19th century.
The chickens were busy going in and out and in and out of their coop, obviously wanting to settle in for the night but not quite sure they were ready to make that large of a commitment yet, while Dumbass was preoccupied with chewing on some wooden slats. Skunk was in a stall, her head stuck in the feeding trough, happily eating away for the moment and blessedly not mooing her discontent to the world.
Now Kylie just had to figure out how to milk the poor girl.
She spotted a three-legged stool in the corner, cleaned by regular usage from the dirt and dust that was so thick elsewhere, and pulled it over to Skunk’s side.
Grand, she could now sit down next to the cow. This didn’t mean much since she didn’t know how to do the next step – actually milking the cow – but hey, it was a small victory nonetheless.
Her eyes were darting around, searching for a bucket or pail or some sort of catching-milk-from-a-cow’s-teat device, when she heard the crunch of gravel under tires and then a diesel engine shutting off. She hurried out through the main barn doors to find Adam swinging down from his truck.
“I realized I forgot a couple of important pieces of information,” he called out as he loped over to her with that easy gait of his. Her eyes followed his body with an eagerness that she wasn’t willing to put a name to just yet.
“Ummm…like how to milk a cow?” she said, laughing easily, as
if just being in the same vicinity as Adam Whitaker wasn’t the most torturously amazing thing she’d ever lived through.
“Yeah, like that.” He grinned down at her when he reached her side. “I see you at least got the animals inside.”
“That part wasn’t too hard,” Kylie said with a shrug. “I just opened up the door over there and they practically ran me over to get into the barn.”
“They’ve been doing this for a while, so they’re pretty used to the routine by now. The chickens are the easiest – they like to roost at night, so as soon as the sun sets, they want to go inside where they can get up onto their perches. So, did you find the milk buckets yet?”
She shook her head. “All I found so far was the milking stool.”
“C’mon, I’ll show you where the milk fridge is at.” He led her into a side room with a fridge and some metal buckets stacked on the counter. He rinsed them out quickly in the shop sink, explaining that he did a thorough cleaning job after milking but always rinsed them before milking again just in case dirt or dust got into them, and then they headed back out into the main part of the barn.
As Adam set up the stool and the buckets, showing how to lean against the cow while milking, how to pull down on the teats, how to direct the milk into the bucket, Kylie couldn’t help but stare at him. She shouldn’t, of course, absolutely positively shouldn’t, and yet, it was hard not to. The way his shirt stretched over his broad shoulders, the way his strong hands flew over everything like magic…it was like watching a milking maestro at work.
“You ready to give it a shot?” he asked, looking up at her. She swallowed hard but nodded. Adam knelt next to her, wrapping his arms around her and moving her fingers into place around the warm, soft teats. “Okay, start at the top and pull down,” he said, his deep voice in her ear, sending shivers down her spine. She tried to pay attention to what she was supposed to be doing, she really did, but the world’s sexiest teacher was in her ear, his arms wrapped around her while he gave milking lessons…
She couldn’t really be faulted for not being able to pay attention, right?
They finally stumbled their way through poor Skunk, who looked back occasionally to see who was yanking on her teats with such enthusiasm, but she didn’t otherwise seem too perturbed. Kylie was grateful for the old girl’s patience, because 30 minutes of milking a cow did not an expert make.
They’d moved over to Dumbass and had gotten to work on her when Kylie’s hands began cramping from the strain. “I can’t believe how hard this is,” she said with a small laugh, massaging her hands. “How come you don’t have a milking machine?”
Adam moved into place, letting Kylie sit off to the side for a minute to give her hands a rest. He began rhythmically pulling on the teats, never missing a beat, never causing Dumbass to bleat out in pain or surprise, each stream of milk aimed perfectly into the bucket.
Kylie was pretty sure she’d never be this good, even if she milked for the next 20 years.
“It isn’t worth it for two animals,” he said with a shrug, his hands continuing to move rhythmically even as he chatted with her. “That kind of setup can be thousands of dollars. It just isn’t worth the money for one cow and one goat. You need a whole herd to make the numbers work, and I’m not interested in being a dairyman.”
“So why do you have these guys?” Kylie asked, stroking Dumbass’ side as they talked. The ol’ girl definitely had what could only be described as “goat aroma,” but Kylie found she didn’t mind. It was earthy and real and so authentic compared to games on her cell phone or chatting with friends via texts.
There was a visceral pleasure to being around animals that she hadn’t realized she’d been missing all her life. Her friends back in Bend would think she’d gone around the bend, but Kylie didn’t care. There was something tactile and pleasurable and so real about this.
“That’s a good question,” Adam answered with a rueful grin. “Both of them were surprises. I had patients who couldn’t afford my vet bill, and somehow, I got these guys as payments instead of cold, hard cash. I’d originally thought I’d sell them or butcher them or something, but they started to grow on me, even Dumbass here, and pretty soon, I didn’t want to think about getting rid of them. But the next time someone offers to trade an animal or two for services rendered, I need to remember what a massive pain in the ass it is to take care of those animals.” He shot her a grin. “I am a veterinarian through and through. It’s hard for me to turn down any animal, no matter the circumstances.”
She chuckled even as her heart twisted a little inside. She wondered for a moment if Adam saw her as another stray animal; someone to feed and house and take care of, even though it shouldn’t be his job. Did he ever do something just because he wanted to, not because he felt obligated to do it? Here he was, taking care of his crippled mother, and animals he hadn’t even intended to get, and running a therapy camp for kids with special needs, and practically adopting a girl on the cusp of adulthood who was stumbling around, lost and clueless, no real idea of how to move forward.
Except she didn’t look at him as a guardian and a father figure. No, she definitely wouldn’t classify her feelings like that. But maybe this was all one-sided and he felt nothing towards her. Maybe—
His hand cupped underneath her chin, pulling it up to meet his gaze. “What are you thinking about?” he asked softly, his fingers running over her chin. She trembled a little – whether from the cold of sitting on the concrete floor or from the nearness of Adam, she couldn’t begin to guess.
“You…why are you helping me out so much?” she whispered. Her face flushed hot under his gaze. She hated bringing this topic up again, but dammit all, he’d asked. She couldn’t lie to Adam and tell him she’d been thinking about daisies and sunsets and how beautiful the Goldfork Mountains were.
Because as much as she loved daisies and sunsets and the Goldfork Mountains, she also felt like a loser. She was struggling not to be a mooch off her mother, but she’d somehow turned into a mooch off her boss instead.
It was embarrassing enough to be a mooch off her mother, but she was at least, well, her mother. Being a mooch off a total stranger was much, much worse. Especially a total stranger who she was falling head over heels in love with, and yet he probably didn’t see her that way at all.
She’d never been one to pine over an unattainable guy but there was always a first time for everything…
He shook his head slowly. “You really don’t realize how much of a help you are to me, do you?” he murmured. “Remind me to tell you a story about business cards sometime. And pretty pink jeweled collars.” She stared at him in confusion. He gave her a sexy-as-hell grin that threatened to set her panties on fire. “Never mind that,” he said with a small laugh. “The point is, I think I need you just as much as you need me. I was just thinking this morning that it’d only been a few weeks since I brought you onboard, and already, I don’t know how I’d live without you. Trying to balance the whole world on my shoulders is exhausting, and you’ve helped me just a little with that balancing act. That means more to me than anything.”
She nodded. She believed him…mostly.
But more than that, her stomach was just a ball of nerves and butterflies and shooting sparks as his eyes dropped down to her lips and then back up, locking in on her with an invisible bond that felt unbreakable in that moment. She couldn’t breathe or blink or look away and then he was coming closer, ever so slowly closer, giving her every chance to back off, to scramble to her feet and announce that she needed to go inside right then but she didn’t move an eyelash because she didn’t want to go inside.
She wanted to kiss Adam Whitaker and as her heart almost beat out of her chest, she realized that for once, she was going to do exactly what she wanted to do, consequences be damned.
Finally, his lips closed over hers, soft and demanding and needy and she leaned forward, pouring her soul into the kiss. Her blood was thundering in her ears as his lips molded to her
s and then his tongue swept out, seeking the boundaries of her lips, prodding to find its way inside and she opened up with a moan, her whole body wanting to meld together with his.
Breathing and eating and thinking all seemed so complicated and unnecessary in that moment. All she wanted to do was to melt into Adam and to never let go.
Dumbass let out a bleat, turning her head and knocking Kylie over and into Adam’s side with a powerful jerk of her head. Adam caught her and they laughed for a moment, a quiet breathless moment filled with promise, and then it was broken, disappearing into the ether as if it had never existed.
“I better get on my way,” Adam said, scrambling to his feet and offering his hand to Kylie to help her up. “Tomorrow, I need to look over your car and…and lots of other important stuff, so I should get to bed early.”
And then he was gone, jumping into his truck and pulling away with the deep growl of the diesel engine, leaving a breathless and flushed and scattered Kylie in his wake. She stared after him, her fingertips resting lightly on her lips where Adam had kissed her, wondering if he regretted kissing her.
Knowing that she should regret it.
Knowing that she never would.
Even if she never got to kiss Dr. Adam Whitaker again, tonight’s kiss would warm her at night. She could lie in bed and remember it, reliving every moment of it.
And never, ever regret it.
Chapter 17
Adam
Adam hurried to the dining room, running behind as always. First he had to feed the horses and then get started on looking over his mom’s car. The sooner he could sell it to Kylie, the better. She needed it; leaving a person stranded like that with the closest neighbor being over a mile away and no way to get into town if she needed to…well, it just wasn’t right.